Recap: Krystle rushes into Blake's office at Denver-Carrington, passing a small mob of reporters on the way. She tells him that the phones are ringing off the hook and that every journalist in the country wants to score an interview with him. She says she just talked to Fred Palmer, the editor of World Finance, and that he wants to dispatch one of his reporters to write up a cover story that will nauseatingly gush over Blake's brilliance in negotiating the South China Sea deal - and Blake looks amused and says he'll only agree to do it if the cover photo includes his hot trophy wife. Krystle chuckles and says that Fred wants the skinny on how Blake was able to pull off the world's most amaaaaaaazing oil deal, but warns him that he'll want his reporter to ask him some sticky questions about why he would agree to negotiate with a devious double-crosser like Rashid Ahmed. Blake reminds her that he doesn't trust Ahmed, and that he merely acted as an intermediary for the government of whatever unnamed country he inked the South China Sea deal with. Seems weird that a government would appoint a non-citizen of arguable shadiness to represent their sovereign country in a major oil lease deal that will supposedly bring about major changes in energy consumption around the entire world...but whatevs, writers.
Kirby is at the police station, asking to get a look at the note her father wrote before ending it all with his self-inflicted mercy killing during The Bungalow episode. In the note, Joseph admits to setting the cabin fire in an effort to stop that evil woman (aka Alexis) and hopes that his death will satisfy her need for vengeance. Kirby thanks the police officer, then stares into space and robotically says she now fully understands what her father's death was all about.
Adam bursts into Steven's office to express his annoyance about Alexis being in Hong Kong. Steven snappishly tells him she jetted there to salvage whatever oil leases she could get after Blake scooped up the prime ones - thanks to the stolen evaluation that he (meaning himself) wrote up about the South China Sea. Adam warns him about calling the report stolen and reminds him that he too worked very hard on that report. Steven's like, "Whatevs" and tells Adam he never bothered to tell Blake about Alexis' trip to Hong Kong, then barks at him to get the hell out of his office.
Blake and Adam are shooting pool at Carrington manor. Blake remarks to Adam how distracted he seems and assumes it's 'cause of Kirby's recent discovery about her mother's death. Adam says it was cruel of Alexis to inform Kirby that her mother was a philandering murderess shortly before learning of her untimely death, then reminds Blake that Alexis is in Hong Kong, picking over whatever scraps in the form of oil leases he left behind. Blake says he doesn't give a rat's ass about inconveniencing Alexis and insists that nothing will stop his monumental oil deal.
Over in Hong Kong, Mark is pouring two glasses of champagne when Alexis breezes into her hotel suite and demands to know what the hell he's doing here...then orders him to get lost 'cause she has a dinner date. She hands him a small wad of cash and urges him to go out and enjoy himself, and Mark grabs the cash and meekly allows himself to be dismissed. On his way down the hall he sees Rashid Ahmed amble over to Alexis' suite...and when Alexis opens the door and greets him all sexy-breathy, Mark chuckles to himself about the doinkfest that's sure to follow. Ew.
After Rashid and Alexis smooch intensely, he smarmily tells her what an awesome night they have ahead of them. Alexis blushingly agrees, then gleefully asks, "Do I ruin Blake Carrington or don't I?" and Rashid's just like, "Dunno. Are we hitting the sheets now, or what?"
Dex has arrived at Alexis' hotel in Hong Kong...and he's on a pay phone, trying to reach her - but can't 'cause she's too busy doinking Rashid at the moment. He spots Mark in the bar, seats himself beside him, and complains about how he and Alexis should be working together on the South China Sea deal 'cause he's worried she's going to do something stupid to screw it up. Mark assures him he has nothing to worry about regarding Alexis getting double-dealed, then dutifully covers for his boss and tells him that she's currently out shopping.
Adam enters the breakfast room as Jeff is drinking his morning coffee and looking over his divorce papers from Kirby. The two snipe at each other until Adam suggests they end their animosity, then points out that he and Kirby (aka his former rape victim) will be married while he (Jeff) and Fallon will likely retie the knot. He proposes shaking hands to officially let bygones be bygones and holds out his hand, but Jeff shoots him the stink-eye and snaps, "Don't press your luck" and stalks out of the room.
Dex has enlisted two hotel manservants to give him access to Alexis' suite and assist him in delivering a sumptuous breakfast and a giant bouquet of flowers. When they enter the suite, a bewildered Rashid stumbles into the living room with a towel wrapped around his waist...and after the two men glare hatefully at each other for several seconds, Dex snappishly orders the hapless manservants to take the flowers and food away. Rashid threatens to call security - just as Alexis breezes into the room in her silky pink negligee to see whassup. She stares in shock at Dex and moans, "Dex...oh my God..." and Dex snaps, "Happy hour's over" and orders Rashid to get dressed and slink through the back door if he hopes to avoid an ass kicking. Rashid angrily tells Alexis he'd be happy to deal with "this whining dog", but Alexis assures him she's more than capable of handling this private matter and assures him that it's OK for him to leave. She then turns to Dex and chides him for bursting in on her unannounced, and he gets all indignant as he reminds her that he had pledged his fidelity to her during the previous episode 'cause of his deep love for her...then contorts his face into an angry expression and snarls, "But what I fell in love with was a slut - a slut with the morals of a dog in perpetual heat!" An enraged Alexis smacks him across the face, and he responds by smacking her back (!), and she retaliates to the counter-smack by lunging at him and knocking him to the floor, where they start wrestling around. Before things can turn too weirdly violent-erotic, Alexis scratches Dex on the cheek and begins throwing things at him...and he smirks and says, "Nice to see the real you, Alexis." An enraged Alexis lunges at him again - but this time Dex hauls her to her feet and gives her an intense smooch. The two stare at each other with horny rancor before Alexis pulls him toward her - but Dex shoves her away and decides that, nope, he's not going to forgive her for cheating on him with Rashid and reward her with a jealousy-fuelled hate-doink and declares, "We're through!" [I honestly didn't see that coming.] Alexis widens her eyes and dramatically shakes her head in disbelief - LOL - then contorts her face into an expression of disdain and snarkishly calls him "an overrated cowboy", and refers to herself in the third person as she haughtily pronounces, "Nobody owns Alexis!" and throws a champagne bottle at him. Dex shoots her one last stink-eye and stalks out of the suite. Awesome!
Kirby is at a gun shop, looking to buy a handgun. The store clerk spends a few minutes lecturing her on the dangers of guns and reminds her that she can always call the police if she finds herself in peril...but then lays a few small handguns on the counter for her to peruse.
Blake is primping for his interview with Gordon Wales, the local editor of World Finance. Krystle offers to accompany him 'cause of the strong likelihood he's going to lose his temper and come off looking an angry dickwad. Blake declines her help and says that while he's not a pushover, he's confident that the interview will go very well.
In the next scene, Blake is letting his inner [but also largely outer] dickwad shine as he snappishly admonishes Gordon Wales about conducting the interview like an inquisition, then bitchily refuses to answer any questions about Rashid Ahmed. Gordon drops the subject and brings up Tracy Kendall's firing and asks him whassup with firing her during such an important business trip - and Blake clams up and declares the interview over. Gordon shrugs and promises to send him a copy of the article once it's published...and Blake snaps, "I'll be sure to show it to my legal staff!" Smooth, Blake.
Back at Carrington manor, Krystle and Claudia are about to leave for work when the phone rings...and it's another suspicious sounding call for Claudia. Krystle offers to take it, and as soon as she picks up the receiver she hears Matthew's voice on the other end pleading, "We need you, Lindsay and I. We're a family." Krystle's like, "Hello? Matthew? It's me, Krystle" and is mystified when Matthew doesn't respond to her. When the call abruptly ends, Krystle stares pensively into space before recounting to Claudia what Matthew said. She says it sounded like a recording...and Claudia decides it's finally time to mention that when Matthew was in the Middle East while she was at the funny farm (pre-Season 1), he told her that he had mailed her a cassette tape in lieu of a written letter. According to Matthew's mother, the oral letter never arrived - but Claudia thinks that maybe it did arrive and that Mama Blaisdel cuntishly kept it from her all these years. Krystle promises to help get to the bottom of the matter that could easily have been resolved during the first installment of The Voice episode trilogy.
Jeff invites Fallon to go horseback riding with him...and by horseback riding, he means go with him to a nearby park with a carousel. As the two climb onto plastic horses, Jeff asks her if she's ready to get remarried yet, but she doesn't reply 'cause her head suddenly starts to ache from the around-and-around motion of the carousel. Fallon promptly returns to her office, pours herself a drink, and calls the doctor who treated her after her skull fracture.
Krystle and Claudia arrive at Mama Blaisdel's house to inquire about the tape Matthew recorded pre-Season 1 and mailed to Claudia from the Middle East. When Krystle threatens to call the police and report her for harassment, Mama Blaisdel cracks and admits that she sold the tape for $500 to a mystery man who outright said he planned to use it to fuck with Claudia's head. She then snarks about how Claudia doesn't deserve a moment of happiness in her marriage with Steven, with whom she cheated on Matthew...despite the fact that Matthew also cheated on Claudia. With Krystle, amusingly enough.
Krystle heads over to Denver-Carrington to give Blake an update on the Claudia/Mama Blaisdel situation. Blake suspects that Alexis somehow orchestrated the "Matthew" calls, and tells Krystle he'll handle everything from here on in.
Blake heads over to the office of Morgan Hess and forces his way inside. He snappishly asks the P.I. if he's still doing shady work for Alexis, but Hess just stares at him blankly and says he has absolutely no clue what he's talking about. Blake spots a tape player on his desk, shoves past Hess, and hits the play button...and naturally it's the tape Matthew had recorded for Claudia. Blake demands to know how much Alexis paid him to torment her own daughter-in-law, but Hess insists it wasn't Alexis, a woman he now hates with the intensity of a thousand suns. He says he intends to plant the tape in Alexis' office so that Steven would find it and hate her for what she's been doing to his wife. Blake barks, "Scum!" and admonishes him for playing games with Claudia's fragile sanity. He then summons the police sergeant who, up until now, has been lurking in the hallway [and apparently takes orders from Blake - as opposed to his superior within the police department] and places Hess under arrest.
Claudia is standing in front of the fireplace, staring at a photo of Lindsay. Steven enters the room and asks whassup, and Claudia tells him she couldn't bring herself to bring charges against Mama Blaisdel after all the suffering she's been through. She then decides, 'Enough grieving over my deceased crybaby daughter already' and tosses Lindsay's photo into the fire, then says she wants to focus all of her energy on her future with him and Danny. Steven gives her a smooch, then picks her up and carries her to the bed, where they start to go at it.
Tracy ambles into the bar of her Hong Kong hotel and notices Dex drowning his sorrows in the bottle. She joins him and tells him that Blake fired her from Denver-Carrington - though conveniently leaves out the icky part about her trying to seduce the old goat. Dex mutters something about Alexis' betrayal then offers to buy her a drink, and Tracy flirtily sizes him up as she chuckles about Alexis hooking up with another man. In the next scene, the two are enjoying some post-coital afterglow...and as they banter about how awesome each other is in the sack, Dex offers Tracy a job working for Alexis so that she can spill any damaging insider info she may have about Denver-Carrington. He then says that if she's willing to double-cross Alexis and spy on her for him, he'll give her an additional salary. Tracy looks into it, asks if an occasional bed romp with him could be part of the sleazy arrangement (it can!), and the two start going at it again.
Jeff informs Blake that the last loan for the South China Sea deal was approved and wired to Hong Kong. He compliments Blake for being such a brilliant risk-taking businessman, then scoffs about Alexis' unwillingness to ever take a similar risk with ColbyCo. Blake smugly tells him that he successfully shut Alexis out of getting any oil leases from the South China Sea deal, then laughs about how the only remaining leases are worthless.
Rashid stops by Alexis' hotel suite to give her a gift: a jeweled mirror that once belonged to the Empress of Tibet. Alexis coos over its beauty and says she'll treasure it forever, then asks how their deal is proceeding - and Rashid says it's going well, but that he's making his moves carefully. When Alexis presses him to tell her when his plot will be unleashed, he says, "The explosion will be heard all over the financial world" and adds that soon Blake will be dead financially. Alexis poutishly murmurs, "Blake's funeral, finally" then stares contemplatively at herself in the jeweled mirror.
Recap: Rashid Ahmed drops by Blake's (Hong Kong) hotel suite in advance of their joint press conference in front of the world media...'cause apparently the world media is waiting - with bated breath! - to hear all about how their deal making went. Ahmed assumes that Blake hit the sheets with Tracy since he's so far away from home and all...then compliments the old goat's yummy track record of hot wives. Blake snappishly reminds him that they're about to make a statement to the press - and Tracy pokes her head into the room to inform them that the news crew has just arrived.
Blake makes a quick phone call to Krystle to inform her that the South China Sea deal is all signed and ready to implement...and that he's taking Tracy out for dinner as a reward for all of her diligent note-taking. A delivery guy interrupts his call to drop off his missing luggage from the airlines...and when Blake browses through the contents of the carry-on bag, he realizes that the delivery guy brought him Tracy's bag by mistake. He's shocked to find a framed photo of Tracy canoodling with Eric Grayson (the guy who recruited Blake to become State Chairman of the Party) - 'cause, yeah, who doesn't slip a framed photo of oneself with a secret married lover in carry-on luggage when flying overseas for work? - just as Tracy drops by his suite to swap their mixed up bags. She anxiously says she hopes he didn't look inside her carry-on 'cause she's such terrible packer, and Blake just grunts unintelligibly. She giddily reminds him that dinner is in thirty minutes, then rushes back to her room to change and primp for a night out with goat daddy.
Mark is shuffling around Alexis' penthouse in his fuzzy warm bathrobe, helping himself to the decadent breakfast food that some flunky from the restaurant downstairs must have just delivered. He turns on the television set just as Alexis sweeps into the living room wearing a pale blue negligee ensemble...and she complains of a headache from all the champagne she drank at a party last night. She snappishly orders Mark to turn off the TV - but he begs her to pleeeeeease let him watch sports news. Before Alexis can incredulously contemplate the useless man-pet she's been keeping in her penthouse for no explainable reason, a TV news anchor interrupts the regularly scheduled programming to announce that Blake Carrington has just made "the deal of the century". The camera then pans to an uninspiring press conference featuring Blake and Ahmed stiffly seated at a table together, while Tracy is quietly seated in the background.
Blake introduces Ahmed as the representative of the cooperating government (of which country, we're never told), and that the South China Sea deal they just negotiated will tap into new sources of energy and benefit not only their two countries, but the entire world. Sounds implausibly lofty, but OK. Alexis angrily shuts off the TV and barks at Mark to get lost so she can make a private phone call. She calls an operator in Hong Kong to track down Rashid Ahmed...and when she hears a weird clicking sound on the line, she irritably orders Mark to hang up the phone in his room and get his ass back upstairs so she can reprimand him face-to-face. When he sheepishly emerges from the little stairwell that leads to his hovel, he explains that he only eavesdropped on her 'cause he wants to improve his future and was hoping she could give him a few leads on how to grow his savings. Alexis somehow refrains from bursting out laughing [like I couldn't help doing] and tells him she's impressed by his desire to accumulate more wealth and promises to discuss it with him after they return from Hong Kong. Mark perks up and is all, "Wha-a-a?! I get to go to Hong Kong?!!" and she explains that she's going to need protection while in Hong Kong 'cause the trip will involve "staggering amounts of cash" ... and for some reason believes that Mark's lackluster bodyguarding skills will be adequate to provide a high level of security. Mark stares into space, looking flattered and intrigued by the weighty assignment. LOL.
At dinner, Blake asks Tracy what she thought of Eric Grayson, and she just shrugs and says she hardly knows the man, then asks why he's asking. Blake cagily says he just wants to be sure they'll get along 'cause she's going to have to work closely with him on the party's campaign once they return to the States. Tracy flirtily says she's most looking forward to working with the State Chairman of the Party, then grins stupidly and discreetly removes one of her earrings while he's not looking.
Over at ColbyCo, Alexis' new assistant (Lloyd) informs her that her reservations for Hong Kong have been booked and confirmed. Soon after, Dex arrives with a wrapped gift and tells Alexis he has to fly to L.A. for business later today and would like her to accompany him. Alexis unwraps the gift and coos happily at the violet corsage inside - and Dex schmaltzily suggests she wear it during their L.A. trip. Alexis tells him it's lovely, but that she's too busy to travel with him today...and adds that he'll probably want to be unfettered during the trip so he can hit the sheets with all the hot L.A. women he's sure to rub up against. Dex is all, "Whoa.." and tells her he stopped whoring around ever since the two of them hooked up, pronounces, "I'm old fashioned that way", and cites his deep belief in fidelity. Alexis credits him for being so delightfully old fashioned, but says she's still unable to accompany him on the trip. Dex says, in that case, he'll conduct his business in L.A. as quickly as he can so he can hurry home and be with her...and the two cap off the scene with a yuckily intense smooch.
Krystle drops by La Mirage to lunch with Claudia...but Claudia gets all wigged out when she sees a young blonde girl who looks a lot like Lindsay. Krystle gives her a comforting pat and says it's perfectly normal to mistake strangers for dead loved ones. But that her daughter would never ever be allowed back on Dynasty after the spectacle of her unspeakably ugly crying scenes in Season 1.
Alexis coos to Steven about how happy she is that he's safely back from [the TV back lot that was populated with enough donkeys and colorful ponchos to make viewers believe that they had been magically transported to] Peru. She bitches about how Blake sneaked off to Hong Kong and tied up a bunch of leases in the South China Sea without giving ColbyCo a fair chance to get in on the bidding. Steven argues that Blake doesn't sneak or steal - but insists that Adam would. Alexis rolls her eyes and changes the subject to her imminent trip to Hong Kong, where she's going to see about wrapping up any of the remaining leases. Steven suddenly gets distracted when he stares across the room and spots the violet corsage that Dex had given her earlier, then spacily wanders over to it. Alexis assures him it has nothing at all to do with the weird violet deliveries that Claudia's been getting, and reminds him that violets are a very popular flower.
Back in Hong Kong, Blake and Tracy are walking back to their hotel suites. She flirtily thanks him for dinner, then pretends she lost her earring while making phone calls in his suite earlier. Blake pretends to take the bait and invites her in...and when he's not looking, she discreetly takes her "missing" earring out of her purse and pretends to find it on the carpet. She thanks him for his kindness in not drawing attention to her earring-less ear while they were dining in the restaurant, and Blake scrunches his face grouchily and says he didn't draw attention to it 'cause he knows full well that she was wearing both earrings during dinner. He says he's well aware of "women's games", then calls her out on the "Eric Grayson charade". Tracy correctly assumes that he must have come across her framed photo of the two of them when their bags had gotten mixed up by the airlines, and chirps, "Guilty as charged" ... then casually admits that, yep, she's been boned by Eric from time to time. She refers to him as "an attractive man", then gives Blake an appreciative once-over and purrs, "And I happen to believe in going after what I find attractive. And I think you're very attractive." She puts her arms around him and asks if he feels the same way 'bout her - but Blake irritably pushes her away and sternly reminds her that the only reason she's here is 'cause his wife is pregnant and was unable to fly. He orders her to forget about her attraction to him - and by him I think we can safely assume they both mean his money and associated perks - then fires her and tells her to figure out her own transportation back to Denver. Tracy poutishly retorts that he can't fire her 'cause of how good she is at what she does, but he just snaps, "Good bye!" and glares into space as she tearfully rushes out of the suite.
Kirby tells Adam she thinks she may have found out where her murderess mother is being incarcerated: some asylum in Bismarck. When Adam rolls his eyes and tells her to please leave this tedious subplot alone 'cause it's doubtful that any good could possibly come of it, she snarkishly retorts that she's going to search for her long-lost mother with or without his help. To that I say: please do it without his help...preferably off camera. Adam grabs her, envelopes her in a tight hug, and insists he loves her. She barks, "Show me that!" and the two silently stare at each other until the camera pans away.
Fallon and Jeff return to the mansion after a day of horseback riding. After some flirty banter, Jeff proposes marriage before the ink on his divorce papers from Kirby can have time to dry. Fallon says it's definitely tempting, but that she doesn't want to say yes for the wrong reason, and that she should prolly take some time to think about whether or not they should jump into a re-marriage. Jeff contorts his freakish caterpillar eyebrows and says he's good with that...and the two smooch.
Blake's private plane lands at a small airstrip in Denver...and eagerly awaiting his arrival is Krystle in a bulky fur coat, along with a news crew that must not have had anything more newsworthy to cover that day. As Blake steps onto the tarmac, the reporters surround him and gush about his expert deal making - LOL - but he rudely shoves past them to stare creepishly at Krystle and kiss her hello. Once they're out of earshot from the reporters, he informs her that he fired Tracy for trying to seduce him...and Krystle somehow refrains from laughing/cringing at the visual of an attractive thirty-two year old woman pretending to be hot for goat daddy, and promises to handle his publicity from now on. She adds that she can't really be too mad at Tracy 'cause of her excellent taste in men...and the two get all schmaltzy and compliment each other's awesomeness.
Kirby and Adam arrive at a reporter's office in Bismarck. The reporter hands Kirby an article he clipped about her mother, who was released after being declared sane. Kirby asks if he knows where she went after her release, and he solemnly replies, "Yes, I know where she is" ... and in the next scene, Adam and Kirby pull up to the local graveyard. By scripted coincidence, Kirby runs into an old friend of her mother's, who directs her to the proper gravestone, which for some spooky reason just has her name engraved on it - no birth/death dates. The old friend tells Kirby that her mother loved her soooo much, and that she had a doll she named Kirby. During her incarceration, she nattered incessantly about hoping to be forgiven by her husband and daughter and had wanted to return to Denver, but didn't have the courage after her life was destroyed. Kirby has a flashback of when Alexis taunted her about how her mother ran off with and killed her lover, then thanks the kindly old woman and returns to where Adam is waiting. He asks her if she's ready to go home, and she stares vacantly into space as she robotically replies, "Home...yes. I know exactly what I have to do there." That can't be good.
Dex drops by Alexis' office and is miffed when Lloyd tells him that she left for Hong Kong not long ago. Steven appears out of nowhere and snarkishly asks Dex if he's going to send his mother another violet corsage. Dex acknowledges that he's well aware that he (Steven) doesn't particularly like him 'cause of how much he resents his relationship with Alexis, then correctly guesses that he suspects him of being the sicko who's been sending Claudia weird violet deliveries. Steven warns him to not hurt anyone he cares about, and Dex snaps at him for making threats and storms out of the office. It's really too bad that these two yawns don't have the volatility of Krystle and Alexis engaged in a heated argument while standing next to a muddy pond. (Dynasty cat fights are so damn awesome to recap.)
Krystle is playing with Danny in the nursery when Fallon enters the room and slumps into the rocking chair. She says she's now grateful to Alexis for warning her about Peter, who made it clear that he didn't particularly like children. She says if she had married Eurotrash, he might have pulled her away from Baby Blake - but Krystle doesn't agree that she would have allowed that to happen, however infatuated with the weirdo she had allowed herself to become. Krystle remarks that she and Jeff seem really close lately, and Fallon gets a dreamy look on her face and says it's definitely possible that they could end up together again.
Blake summons Eric Grayson to his office to sternly announce that their political partnership is over, and judgily adds that he doesn't do business with liars. When Eric scrunches his face confusedly, Blake says he knows he's been boning Tracy, and that he wants nothing to do with a party that would put up with the likes of him. Actually, his affair with Tracy seems pretty mild in the sleazy world of D.C. politics, but OK. Blake promises to not out his affair for the sake of his family, but makes it clear that he's resigning as State Chairman of the Party...then brusquely orders Eric to make the announcement to the press.
Claudia gets a call at La Mirage, and once again it's Matthew's pleading voice: "Claudia, we need you, Lindsay and I." She tells Fallon to call the police - but a few seconds later the caller abruptly hangs up. By coincidence (or not?) we see that Dex is in a phone booth, booking a flight to Hong Kong.
That evening at Carrington manor, Blake tells his lawyer Andy that he almost has all the cash he's going to need to pay for the South China Sea oil leases. Andy warns him to not get too cocky about his oil lease deal, 'cause of the humiliation he could face if it fails and he "falls from a great height". Blake brushes off the notion that anyone could possibly screw up this deal for him - like Alexis, for example - and smugly calls the South China Sea deal "a once in a lifetime thing".
Alexis, Mark, and a mountain of luggage arrive in Hong Kong. Alexis enters her fancy hotel suite, which is filled with flowers...and Ahmed makes a schmaltzy entrance decked out in a black robe adorned with gold embroidery and lays it on thick about her beauty. He pours them both a glass of champagne and toasts "the most provocative and fascinating woman in the world". And while he's doing that, the fake black mustache he's sporting struggles to remain glued on his face.
Ahmed tells Alexis he was intrigued when she had implored him to stay in Hong Kong after his dealings with Blake. He then tries to get her into the sack, but she brushes off his advances and says she's too exhausted to allow him to tap that. She does, however, promise that once she's rested they'll have a chat "about you and me...and Blake Carrington and five million dollars". Ahmed looks intrigued, then leans in for an intense smooch.
Recap: Fallon grabs a quick breakfast with Blake and Krystle before heading off to La Mirage to resume her career now that she's swiftly regained the ability to walk. Blake bids her adieu, then flirtily banters with Krystle about their upcoming business trip to Hong Kong.
Steven wakes up alone in bed and finds a note from Claudia: I've gone to Peru to find out if Matthew is really dead.
At Denver-Carrington, Blake and Krystle are briefing Tracy on The Far East Situation when Krystle suddenly looks pale and nearly falls over. Tracy brazenly asks if her shakiness is pregnancy related...and as Krystle stares at her in bewilderment, Blake scrunches his wrinkly face confusedly and is all, "Wha-a-a-a?" Tracy contorts her face into a faux sheepish expression and explains that she nosily discovered that Krystle recently had an appointment with an obstetrician, and put two and two together when she nearly fainted just now. She scuttles out of the room before Krystle has a chance to ask why in blazes she's so interested in her doctors' appointments...and then Krystle tells Blake that the doctor told her that pregnancy was within the realm of possibility. Blake grins stupidly and says he's keeping his fingers crossed that she's carrying his spawn. Blech.
Over at ColbyCo, Steven is commiserating to Alexis about how Claudia is being driven to near madness by whatever mysterious person has been tormenting her with strange, Matthew-related deliveries. Alexis assures him that she's not the one behind the deliveries, and that she had advised his wife-beard to contact the police so that they could get to the bottom of this harassment. She then rolls her eyes and snarks about how illogical it was for Claudia to jet off to Peru in the middle of the night, then says when she returns to Denver, it might do her some good to get checked back into the funny farm for a round of mental health treatment. Steven stares contemplatively into space as he mulls over that sensible suggestion.
Jeff invites Fallon to go skiing with him in Aspen...and after some flirty back and forth, Fallon says she'd love to, then needlessly assures him she's totes over Peter De Vilbis.
Krystle and Blake are dining at La Mirage when the waiter brings over a telephone so that Krystle can take a phone call from her doctor. He confirms that, yep, Blake's bun is definitely in her oven...and Krystle thanks him for calling, then grins at the old goat and squeals, "It's a yes!"
Claudia arrives at her Peruvian hotel in a dilapidated station-wagon taxi...and in the background are extras decked out in colorful Peruvian ponchos wandering around with donkeys in tow so that viewers can get a real feel for what it's like to be on a ridiculously fake looking TV studio back-lot. An American man named Pat Dunne appears out of nowhere, somehow knows who Claudia is, and tells her he was working in Peru when Matthew had his fiery jeep accident in the jungle. He offers to help with whatever she came all this way to find, then invites her to have dinner with him later.
Blake cautions Krystle against making the trip to Hong Kong on account of her delicate condition and says she should stay home and rest. He then tells her that he arranged for one of his manservants to buy a few tokens of his love for her, then steers her over to one of the mansion's many sitting rooms and presents her with a sable coat and a giant gaudy diamond necklace. Krystle chuckles gleefully at the extravagant gifts, assures him she'll take it easy now that she's in a family way, and gives him a happy hug.
Mark runs into Dex at La Mirage and offers to buy him a drink so they can work through the grudges that each of them has been holding toward the other for no intelligible reason. Dex shrugs and goes, "Sure, why not?"
Later, Dex is sipping on a martini at the penthouse when Alexis arrives home. He tells her he just had a drink with Mark and that it's pretty obvious that the mustached gigolo was trying to get the skinny on whatever nefarious schemes she has brewing. Alexis says she's not in the mood to discuss Mark, 'cause at the moment she's far more concerned about what a burden nutty Claudia is on her beloved son.
In Aspen, Fallon and Jeff are sitting by the fire, drinking hot chocolate and canoodling. They agree on how far they've both come from the vapid dinkwhistles they were in Season 1, then stare longingly at each other. Fallon suddenly clutches her head and says she has a headache, and Jeff says no doubt it's 'cause she cracked her skull during the drunken hit and run three episodes ago. Fallon asks for a rain check on any further canoodling, and Jeff suggests she take a nap and meet up with him for dinner later.
After dinner, Claudia and Pat Dunne are strolling around the fake outdoor Peru set. Pat urges Claudia to report in with the local police, then gets all grab-handsy and invites himself up to her room. She pulls away and is all, "Whoa buddy, I'm married" and tells him she wants to be alone now - and when he starts getting even more grab-handsy, Steven appears and orders Pat to take his hands off his wife-beard. Pat shrugs, tells Steven he's a lucky man (LOL, OK..?), then ambles off. Claudia races over to Steven and hugs him and says she's sooo happy he followed her to Peru.
Back at Carrington manor, Kirby ambles into the kitchen in her satin nightie and runs into Adam. She tells him she's having trouble sleeping 'cause she can't stop thinking about her criminally insane mother...and Adam's like, "Whatever" and says he can't think about that right now 'cause he has to focus all of mental energy on monitoring Blake's Hong Kong trip. Kirby snappishly accuses him of not giving a damn about her family problems, and Adam's like, "Well d'yuh" and changes the subject to their upcoming nuptials and how he'd like them to try for another baby asap, which...ew. He then backpedals and acknowledges how shitty it was of Alexis to hire an investigator to gather together all those newspaper articles about her murderous mom, but reminds her that Blake really likes her and couldn't be happier that she's about to become a member of his dysfunctional family. This seems to placate Kirby, and he plants her with one of his creepishly intense smooches.
Blake is in his fancy Hong Kong hotel suite, complaining over the phone to the airlines about how they lost his and Tracy's luggage. A few seconds later, he gets a surprise visit from Sheikh Rashid Ahmed, who smugly informs Blake that he's representing the government that Blake is currently negotiating his pending oil deal with. Blake haughtily calls this arrangement unacceptable, but Ahmed just shrugs and says he can either deal with him or walk away from the negotiations.
Jeff and Fallon are canoodling in bed, and both agree that they've enjoyed their impromptu Aspen vacay.
Adam storms into Alexis' office to declare that he's marrying Kirby, and that she (Alexis) will regret it if she does anything more to hurt his future wife/former rape victim. Alexis urges him to consider his future, specifically the kind of woman with whom he wants to share his wealth and business success. She derisively describes Kirby as a low-class liability with skeletons in her closet - but before Adam can retort, he gets an emergency overseas call from Blake, who tracked Adam down 'cause he urgently needs him to determine whether or not Rashid Ahmed's current government assignment is on the up and up. He tells Adam to keep this intel from Alexis...and Adam's like, "Can do", but then presses his pen hard while writing AHMED (in all caps!) on her notepad 'cause apparently he's incapable of committing one man's name to memory. After he rushes out of the office, Alexis cleverly uses her pencil to shade the imprint of what Adam wrote on the pad and easily sees that it's AHMED. She stares contemplatively into space as she silently mulls over what this revelation could possibly mean.
Later in the penthouse, a drunk Mark overhears Alexis talking to someone on the phone (Morgan Hess?) about how Blake is making some kind of deal with Rashid Ahmed in Hong Kong, and that she wants plenty more dish 'bout that.
The local police escort Claudia and Steven into "the jungles of Peru" to visit the site of Matthew's fiery jeep accident. When they reach the site, a police officer points at a ravine where the charred debris of Matthew's vehicle can still be seen and says that no bodies were ever found. He solemnly adds, "The jungle has a way of claiming everything" and says it's more than likely that some ravenous jungle creatures dragged the charred bodies away from the vehicle and had a good munch-fest. Claudia looks horrified by the grisly visual, then wails, "OMG!" when she hears the snorting noise of a creature (LOL...Piglet, is that you?) lurking nearly. The officer shrugs and apologizes for grossing her out just now...and Claudia collapses into Steven's arms, sobbing with inconsolable grief.
Back in Hong Kong, Rashid Ahmed returns to Blake's room for a scheduled meeting and gets testy when he sees Tracy standing a few feet away. Blake explains that he wants a witness at their meeting, then gruffly suggests they get down to business. He tells Ahmed he had the legitimacy of his current assignment checked out, was satisfied with the results of that, then pulls out a check for $5 million. He says it's a down payment for the $100 million he plans to pay on the various oil leases...and after some rancorous back and forth, the two men agree that Blake will pay the payment in full within the next thirty days. Ahmed tries to seal the deal by merely shaking on it, but Blake insists he sign the formal contract so that everything's above board. An unhappy Rashid Ahmed reluctantly signs the agreement.
Alexis is enjoying a light breakfast in her penthouse when Fallon drops by unannounced, decked out in a ratty looking sweater jacket with fugly wool things hanging off her shoulders. She apologizes to her mother for her extreme rudeness when she first regained consciousness in the hospital, and also when she tried to warn her about what a scheming womanizer Peter De Vilbis is. She acknowledges the bond that inherently exists between parents and children - and Alexis breathily coos, "Oh Fallon!" and gives her a happy hug.
Fallon returns to Carrington manor and congratulates Krystle on her pregnancy, and the two schmaltzily exchange I love yous. As Fallon exits the sitting room, she clutches her head in pain and looks shaky...then stares worriedly into space about whatever kind of delayed-reaction head injury she may be suffering from. It remains unclear why she doesn't just go to a damn doctor and get a head CT.
Blake and Tracy are wrapping up a coffee klatch in Blake's hotel suite - but Tracy says she doesn't want the evening to end and suggests they go over her notes from the Ahmed meeting. Blake doesn't look thrilled by the idea, but reluctantly agrees...and Tracy scurries back to her room and returns a few seconds later with her notes and a silky pink negligee. She holds it against herself and coquettishly says she saw it while she was shopping and couldn't resist buying it...and when Blake just stares blankly at the sexy garment, she asks him if she should buy one for Krystle. He declines that offer, decides that nothing good could possibly come of viewers being subjected to the icky spectacle of a repugnant old goat like himself getting it on with an overly-ambitious gold digger who's more than thirty years his junior, and woodenly says they can discuss her meeting notes in the morning. A disappointed and slightly bewildered Tracy leaves him her notebook, packs up her pink negligee, and heads very slooooowly towards the door.
Back at Carrington manor, Steven, Claudia, and Krystle are cooing at Danny's cuteness in the nursery. Claudia, who's oddly upbeat considering the grisly news she just received in Peru, giddily says she's soooo happy to be home, and what a relief it is that the Matthew/Lindsay/death in Peru storyline is finally over. Gerard pokes his head into the nursery and tells Claudia she has a phone call, and she ambles into the hall to find the nearest phone. When she picks up, she hears a voice that sounds like Matthew's...and he's urgently saying, "We need you, Claudia! We're a family!" Claudia shrieks, "Where is Lindsay?!!" then keels over and hits the floor as she loses consciousness. Steven and Krystle come running over and are all, "Wha-a-at's going on?!!"
Recap: Blake drops in on Fallon, who's sitting in the chair in her hospital room looking despondent about her faux below-the-waist paralysis. Blake tells her she looks great, says he's delighted that she'll be coming home today, and assures her that she'll be up and walking before the end credits roll. Fallon says she's not quite sure 'bout that, then moans about how none of her doctors have been able to explain the mysteriousness of her paralysis. Blake looks contemplative for a few seconds and says he'll go talk to the doctor about it right now...and in the next scene the doctor confirms that, nope, there's nothing physically wrong with Fallon and that he's pretty sure the "problem" will resolve itself once she breaks through her emotional blockage, such as opening up about the humiliation of getting dumped by a Eurotrash assbag like Peter De Vilbis. Until then, he advises that she exercise her leg muscles and regularly stretch out her tendons.
Morgan Hess delivers an assortment of newspaper clippings to Alexis about Joseph Anders' wife - who was presumed dead, but is actually alive and serving time in a prison for the criminally insane. Alexis snarks to Hess about how long it took him to gather all this info, and he counter-snarks about how time-consuming it is to compile this kind of stuff without the benefit of Google...and that it's extremely cunty of her to play God with people's lives. He warns her that one day her nefarious schemes will blow up in her face, but she's like, "Whatever", gives him his check for services rendered, and orders him to skedaddle.
Alexis drops by Blake's office while he's on the phone with Fallon's nurse...and when he finishes the call, he gives Alexis an update on their daughter and invites her to the mansion this evening for the grand homecoming. Alexis poutishly declines 'cause of how hostile Fallon was to her when she first regained consciousness during the previous episode, then changes the subject to Adam and complains that he's about to ruin his life by marrying so far beneath his station. Blake disagrees, reminds Alexis that Adam is a big boy, and that he doesn't believe a marriage to Kirby is necessarily a bad thing...the utter creepiness of him fucking marrying the woman he violently attacked in Season 3 notwithstanding. He says he's thrilled that Adam is finally "acting like a man" (er, OK..?) and doesn't want to interfere with that, and Alexis haughtily retorts that it's obvious that of the two of them she's the only one who cares about their children, insists that Kirby is not good enough for their creepy rapist spawn, then gets up and sashays out of his office.
Fallon is chauffeured via a mini limo to Carrington manor, and she's accompanied by Blake and Krystle. Jeff bounds out of the mansion to greet them and scoops Fallon and her lifeless legs into his arms to transport her inside.
Later, Fallon is relaxing on a chaise in her room petting a cute white cat we've never seen before when Blake drops by to urge her to open up about Peter's callous dumping of her. Fallon brushes off the dumping by saying it was a mistake she'd rather forget...and when Blake tries to press the issue, she firmly tells him to leave it alone and to go fetch Baby Blake so she can indulge in some much needed mother-son cuddle time.
Adam stops by Kirby's room, shirtless and sweating after a workout in the gym. Ew. When he gets all grab-handsy with her, she implores him to let her go - and he creepily asks, "Do you really want me to?", then responds to his own question by declaring, "I don't think so." He smooches her intensely and gabbles about how all of their dreams are about to come true: power, wealth, a Carrington heir. Ew. Kirby stares back at him blankly and asks him if he really just wants to marry her to secure an heir, and he breathily retorts, "I want it all.." and plants another intense smooch on her lips. Kirby somehow relaxes in his iron grip and gets into his creepy foreplay just as the phone rings...and a disappointed looking Adam leaves the room to give her some privacy to take the call. On the line is Alexis, scantily covered by a towel while she receives a massage. She tells Kirby she'd like to get to know her better since she's about to become her daughter-in-law, then brusquely orders her to come by the penthouse for lunch. When Kirby tries to politely decline, Alexis refuses to take no for an answer, crisply says she'll send her car to the mansion to pick her up, then abruptly hangs up.
Claudia enters the breakfast room and wigs out when she sees a small box sitting on the dining table. Krystle calms her down and tells her it's just a box of napkin holders she asked one of the servants to order, then opens it to show her the contents. Claudia apologizes for squirrelling out and explains that today is hers and Matthew's wedding anniversary, and that she's nervous 'cause she knows someone is out there doing his/her best to destroy her mental state...which, even on the best of days, is pretty fragile.
Fallon is working out in the mansion's gym...and by working out I mean she's sitting on a stationary bicycle with her lifeless feet fastened to the pedals as the motorized apparatus forces her lifeless legs to bob up and down in a cycling motion. Krystle enters the room and urges Fallon to dislodge her mental block by unburdening her anxieties onto a psychiatrist - but Fallon argues that it's her legs not her head that isn't working. Krystle stares back at her in pensive concern for few seconds before shrugging indifferently and exiting the gym.
Tracy flounces into Blake's office to show him the head shots she arranged for him to get done for some kind of Denver-Carrington PR campaign. While she gushes over his photogenic awesomeness, Dex bursts in with an angry look etched on his wooden face. After Tracy hastily excuses herself to get out of the line of fire, Dex snarls at Blake for cancelling the deal to refine oil for his and Alexis' newly formed Lex-Dex corporation...and Blake shoots him a sly grin and says, "Welcome to the big time" and says he made the oil refinement deal with Oscar Stone, not the flunky Lex-Dex, Inc. [with whom Stone signed a deal]. He admonishes Dex for choosing to work in cahoots with Alexis over remaining loyal to Denver-Carrington, then dismissively barks, "Get someone else to refine your oil."
Kirby arrives at Alexis' penthouse for lunch and runs into Mark, who's wearing a dark velvet track suit and is promptly yelled at by Alexis to beat it 'cause he's not invited to this ladies lunch. Someone please explain to me why Mark, whose usefulness as Krystle's still legal husband has long expired, hasn't yet been killed off or written out of the show. Alexis snarks at her manservant 'cause apparently the lunches he just brought up from the downstairs restaurant are Cornish hens - not quail. She then steers Kirby over to the living room for a chat and tells her that a position in the Paris branch of ColbyCo (?) has just materialized out of thin air, and that it includes a fat salary, use of a luxurious Paris apartment, and a car and chauffeur. Kirby says she knows this is just a ploy to keep her away from creepy Adam (which one could think of as an incentive) and says, "No sale, Alexis." She then reminds Alexis that she was raped by Adam in this very living room - ew - then accuses Alexis of [figuratively] doing the same thing to her right now. She defiantly pronounces that her next baby is going to be a Carrington, and Alexis haughtily tells her she doesn't deserve to mingle among the Colorado elite on account of her "bloodline" being in question. When Kirby scrunches her face in confusion, Alexis informs her that her mother is alive and serving time in prison 'cause she killed the lover with whom she abandoned her husband and only child. Kirby shrieks, "You're a liar!" so Alexis hands her the assortment of newspaper clippings she got from Morgan Hess and smugly watches Kirby's shocked and pained reaction.
Fallon and her lifeless legs are parked in a chair near the mansion's pond when Jeff and a small army of manservants appear with all that is necessary for a huge picnic lunch. After everything is spread out, Jeff sets Fallon on the blanket and pours a glass of wine for each of them. Fallon complains about how everyone is bugging her to see a shrink and talk about Peter De Vilbis - but that she really has no desire to re-invoke that tedious storyline. Jeff says he's A-OK not talking about Eurotrash, and that she'll learn to love and walk again once she's fully mentally recombobulated. Fallon gazes at him lovingly for a few seconds, then leans over and gives him a smooch.
Steven drops by Adam's office at Denver-Carrington to snarkishly accuse him of stealing his China Sea Evaluation Report. Adam pretends to have no earthly idea what he's talking about, but then kind of implicates himself by chiding Steven for taking all the credit for a report that he (Adam) did most of the legwork for. Steven shoots him the stink-eye, says that one day soon he's going to find himself tossed out on the street where he belongs, then bitchily storms out of the office. Maybe in the future Steven will think to make a photocopy of his important reports.
In the next scene, Adam presents the China Sea Evaluation Report to Blake and says that he and Steven worked on it together - but only after he (Adam) initiated the project. Blake nods his head and looks very impressed, then buzzes his secretary to ask her to please track down their affiliate in Hong Kong.
Fallon and her lifeless legs are now lounging by the swimming pool when Jeff brings Baby Blake outside to hang with her. When Jeff is called away to take a phone call, Baby Blake gets distracted by his toy truck, which is motoring dangerously close to the pool. Fallon watches in horror, then starts shrieking, "OMG! Baby Blake! Noooooo!!" ... but before the tot can topple over into the water, Fallon leaps up from her chair, runs over to her son, and scoops him into her arms. Jeff rushes over to ensure that no disaster occurred and squeals, "You can walk!" and Fallon's all, "Wha-a-a?" then realizes that since she was suddenly so easily able to regain the use of her legs, her disability had probably been as giant a load of bullcack as when Blake temporarily lost his eyesight in Season 2.
A tearful Kirby shows Blake the assortment of newspaper clippings that Alexis gave her earlier, then asks him if it's really true that her mother is a murderess and still alive. Blake admits that Joseph told him about his wife being institutionalized, and that he had never wanted her to find out. When Kirby wails, "He lied to me!", Blake says that the family she has now is what's most important...and that once she marries his rapist son, she'll officially become part of his dysfunctional clan. He then tells her that tonight the Carringtons are celebrating Fallon's legs being restored to their default settings, and that she would be missed by everyone if she didn't attend the party.
Krystle gabbles at the kitchen staff about how excited everyone is about tonight's dinner, which looks to be an assortment of Fallon's favorite foods.
The Carringtons are dressed up and mingling in the library when Jeff and Fallon make their grand entrance...and Fallon showcases her re-functioning legs and lifts her arms as if to triumph over the disability she's been faking for the last week or so. The family hoots and claps, cries, "Congratulations!" and envelopes her in hugs. At dinner, Blake gives a speech about how sensitive yet resilient Fallon has proven herself to be, then raises his glass to salute her awesomeness.
Alexis is sprawled on her sofa, overindulging on martinis. Dex arrives and reminds her that they have plans to go to the theater - but she tells him she has a headache and therefore no desire to go out. He asks her why she's at home drinking instead of celebrating the end of Fallon's faux paralysis storyline, and Alexis poutishly says that Fallon has proven with her snarkitude that she doesn't want her around...then sadly admits that they've never had a very close mother-daughter relationship. Dex hands her the phone receiver and urges her to reach out to her daughter...and after a few seconds of mulling that over, Alexis cries, "I can't do it!" She then clings urgently onto Dex and barks, "Hold me close like you never have before!" LOL.
During the celebration dinner, a manservant hands Claudia a large envelop that was just delivered to the mansion, and Claudia excuses herself to a private room to examine the contents. Inside the envelop she finds a photo of herself that Matthew took on their first wedding anniversary...and when Steven enters the room to see whassup, she shows him the photo and says she's increasingly skeered of whoever's been sending her all this Matthew-related stuff. Steven shrugs and brushes off her concerns by assuring her that somehow everything is going to be A-OK. He urges her to return to the party, and she says she'll join him after she takes a few minutes to "freshen up". Once he's out of earshot, she picks up the phone and books a flight to Lima, Peru, presumably to investigate for herself whether or not Matthew is really, absolutely, truly dead.
Recap: After the moment of impact between Fallon and the belligerent drunk driver, we get a short replay from the scene in the previous episode where an ashen Blake mutters, "My God.." as Fallon lays unconscious on the ground. Jeff is anxiously hovering over her, and a bunch of other people rush over and gasp at the horror of what they've just witnessed. The intoxicated driver says she appeared out of nowhere, then drunkenly natters about how the accident wasn't his fault. Blake kneels beside Fallon and tells her she'll be OK, and that an ambulance is on its way.
Back at Carrington manor, Kirby is moping in the conservatory while being served coffee. Krystle enters the room to check up on her and bring her some sheet music to encourage some recreational piano playing, then suggests she take a walk in the garden and get some fresh air. Kirby thanks her for her kindness and concern, then snarkishly says she really doesn't want to be bugged right now. Krystle says she totally gets what she's going through - having lost a child herself - and that the best remedy for her depression is to open up and talk about her feelings. Kirby snarks that it's all fine for her, 'cause she has a rich husband and a mansion...then self-piteously calls herself "a downstairs girl" who is expected to keep her feelings to herself. Krystle assures Miss Mopey Pants that she's loved for who she is, not what she is, then hastily excuses herself when Adam bounds into the room. He gushes about how super happy he is that she's home from the hospital...and when she glumly asks if this is home, he says yes, and that she belongs here with him. She asks him if it's OK that she's marrying him even though she doesn't love him, and he grins and says, "You will!" and insists that however long it takes, eventually she'll get so beaten down by his relentless smothering that she'll have no choice but to resign herself to loving him as much as he loves her. Kirby mulls that over and decides, "Ah...what the hell" and Adam's like, "Woo hoo!" and gives her a grabby hug. He gabbles excitedly about all the children they're going to have - ew - and Kirby looks less than thrilled at the horror of what that will entail, then makes a blech face as she snarks, "Carrington children. Only the best." Adam frowns concernedly and says it doesn't sound like her to be so hard and calculating, and she bitterly retorts, "Watch me. I learn fast" and he's just like, "Whatever" and leans in for a smooch.
Blake paces the waiting room of the hospital while Fallon remains unresponsive. When Dr. Walker finally appears, Blake snaps, "What's going on, damn it?! I want to know what's wrong!" then bitchily reminds him that he hired him 'cause he's the best neurosurgeon in the country. Dr. Walker coldly retorts that he wasn't hired to babysit anxious family members who question his credibility, then informs Blake and Jeff that after examining Fallon, he has determined that her only injury is a skull fracture...and that even though she's in a coma, it doesn't look like she suffered any brain damage. Blake apologizes for his dickish behavior and sheepishly thanks the doctor for the update, then mutters to Jeff that he's off to the La Mirage 'cause there's someone he needs to see. Peter!
Blake is irked when Peter's lawyer informs him that the scoundrel is fleeing town...and when Blake demands more details, the lawyer reveals that Peter is due to catch the next flight to New York any minute now, and then is off to Morocco 'cause it has no extradition treaty with the United States. Blake vows to track down the con artist and snarls that he'll personally see to it that he rots in jail. He storms over to Fallon's office, calls the airport, and barks at whoever answers the phone to hold all planes scheduled to leave for New York, then bellows, "I don't care what it takes! Do it!" - LOL - and the airport staffer he's talking to refrains from telling him to go pee up a fucking rope since he has absolutely no authority to be barking orders at him.
Peter is going through the security gates at the airport when an x-ray of his briefcase reveals something suspicious. The guard orders him to open it for inspection, and inside is a giant bag of cocaine. Smooth move, Peter. Blake arrives at the airport with two police officers in tow. He quickly spots Peter, bolts through the security gate without any alarms going off, and lunges at him...then steps aside so his stunt double (whose hair lacks the limp greyness of Blake's 'do) can give him a few solid punches while yelling, "This is for my daughter!" The police officers eventually grab the old goat and restrain him from continuing the implausible beat-down of a man half his age...and as Peter is being handcuffed, Blake snarls, "You're lucky. I would have killed you!" which seems like a very bad thing to utter out loud when you've already been on trial for manslaughtering your son's lover and then accused of almost killing the man you caught schtupping your slutty ex-wife.
Alexis and Dex are canoodling in her ginormous bathtub which is filled with foamy white bubbles, and sexy music is playing in the background. Alexis marvels at how strange it is that the more she rebuffs him, the more interested in her he becomes. Dex cockily says he refuses to take no for an answer - but she cautions him to never overstep his boundaries or criticize her family. Dex asks her if that includes Blake, and she's like, "Hell no" but adds that her past relationship with Blake is none of his business. Dex argues that if someone makes her unhappy, it is his business...and she's like, "Uh, OK" and the two start going at it amid the bubbles.
Later, the two lounge in the penthouse living room in their robes, feeding each other sushi and oysters. Dex remarks on all the passion, bitterness, and hatred she expends on Blake and worries that one day he'll lose her to her ex-husband...but Alexis just chuckles and sassily says he can't lose what he doesn't have in the first place. A few seconds later, Krystle phones the penthouse to give Alexis the news about Fallon's accident, and she's all, "Wha-a? OMG!"
Alexis rushes over to the hospital and gets an update on Fallon's condition from Krystle...and then the two rush around to find the doctor.
Blake is meeting with some guy named Eric, who wants to install Blake as State Chairman of the Party. (Which party, the show doesn't specify...but I have my suspicions.) Eric wanks him about how the party needs a big man who wields power, influence, and respect on its side so they can win back the state house and start passing legislation. Dex suddenly barges into Blake's office and snarks that he just heard about his meeting with Eric, then adds that he's very involved with Colorado politics and doesn't think it's a good idea to appoint Blake as State Chairman of the Party. Eric disagrees and insists that Blake is the best man for the job, and Blake hems and haws about taking on this responsibility while he's currently got the Fallon Comatose Situation to contend with...but then mulls it over for a few more minutes and agrees to give the chairmanship a shot.
Steven, Krystle, and Jeff are in Fallon's hospital room, pacing and wringing their hands. When Steven and Krystle step out of the room to get some coffee, Jeff sits by her bedside, holds her hand, and has a series of flashbacks from their Season 1 elopement, and their recent doink in a Montana motel room. When he's jolted back to the present, he coos to Fallon about how much he and their son love and need her.
Claudia stares at the most recent Lancelot card she received, stares contemplatively into space for a few seconds, then puts the card back in her drawer. She calls up her former mother-in-law and tells her that something strange has been happening involving Matthew and their past life, then asks if she could drive out to the house and have a chat...and Mother Blaisdel's like, "Sure! Come on over!"
Claudia thanks Mother Blaisdel for agreeing to see her - even though she hated her not so long ago - and Mother Blaisdel says they share a great loss and is glad that the bad blood between them finally got smoothed out off-camera. Claudia tells her about the Lancelot cards/violets, then asks her if she can think of anyone who hates her and also knew that she nicknamed Matthew Lancelot. Mother Blaisdel says she can't think of a single person who would say an unkind thing about her, much less play cruel tricks on her...and the two women clutch hands and smile wistfully at each other.
Alexis is on the phone, railing at Krystle because of how Blake stubbornly refused to listen to her about Peter being a shady mofo...and while she's railing, she's dramatically shaking her head from side to side. Krystle stares pensively into space, then decides she doesn't feel like being yelled at anymore and abruptly hangs up on Alexis. LOL. A few seconds later, Mark arrives at the penthouse and generously helps himself to the caviar that Alexis has laid out. He smugly tells her that if she hadn't come between him and Fallon, none of this would be happening right now, and Alexis snarls at him to take his caviar sandwich to his room. A few seconds later, Adam enters the penthouse, looking irked at being summoned there to explain himself after proposing to Kirby. Alexis says she doesn't want him to throw his life away by marrying a commoner, then bewilderedly asks, "What is to love?" Adam insists he loves Kirby...and that when they canoodle, all the years of loneliness he endured as a kidnapped baby/boy/grown man melt away. Alexis reminds him that he's heir to a vast fortune, and Adam says she has no right to live his life for him, then stalks out of the penthouse. Alexis strides over to the phone and calls up Morgan Hess and says she has a job for him: contact The Chronicle and dig up all the dirt he can on Alicia Anders. She nonsensically blurts out, "The crime was murder!"
Tracy and Eric are enjoying a romp in her apartment. He thanks her for suggesting that he ask Blake to be State Chairman of the Party, and she giggles and says, "You're welcome" and tells him that in return she wants to be in charge of the PR so she can hit the campaign trail with Blake. Eric's like, "Whoa, I already have a man in the job", but Tracy orders him to get rid of his man and snaps, "You owe me" and threatens to reveal their affair to his wife if he refuses to do her bidding.
Back at Carrington manor, Adam confesses to Jeff that he was the person behind his poisoning last season. Jeff's all, "Wha-a-a?!" then bellows, "You're asking me to forgive you? Are you out of your mind?" and Adam's like, "Well d'yuh" and retroactively pleads temporary insanity. Jeff doesn't buy it and says the poisoning was obviously premeditated and threatens to go to the authorities, but Adam reminds him that he just lost his child and sadly asks, "Isn't that punishment enough?" Jeff's like, "Uh no" so Adam gets all snarky and tells him that if he presses charges, he'll just deny that he confessed the crime to Blake (along with his confession of a few seconds earlier, I assume) then stalks out of the study.
Adam enters the dining room, where Steven is glumly eating breakfast. Steven informs Adam that Jeff just told him he confessed to poisoning him and framing Alexis. Adam scoffs that Alexis isn't as innocent as she'd like everyone to believe, then urges Steven to look at their mother as an adult would, not a baby boy. It's interesting how quickly Adam's contriteness about his dastardly crimes is starting to wear off.
Jeff runs into Kirby as she ambles down the upstairs hall, looking pale. He ushers her back to her room and cautions her not to push herself too hard or rush into anything - like marry a creepy psychopath, for example. He doesn't get how on earth she can marry Adam, and she cryptically says they all get what they deserve in life, and that she can live with that. Whatever, Kirby.
Blake is sitting at Fallon's bedside, repeatedly barking her name and asking if she can hear him...but she doesn't stir. Jeff enters the room and says he'll take over the next sitting vigil shift, and Blake agrees and says there's something he needs to take care of.
Blake meets again with Eric at his Denver-Carrington office to discuss the state chairmainship. Eric tells him he has a press conference lined up, and that he needs a PR person and has the perfect candidate in mind: Krystle! He then pretends to rethink that dumb suggestion and says that since she's his wife, it may cause the press to look unfavorably on that...then decides it can't possibly be Krystle. Smooth, Eric. He asks Blake if there's anyone else on staff he trusts, and Blake smiles knowingly as he buzzes Marsha and asks her to summon Tracy. In the next scene, Tracy looks fake surprised and reminds Blake that she already has a job at Denver-Carrington...but when he urges her to accept the position, she gushes, "I could never say no to you!" Blake leaves her to "get acquainted" with Eric...and once he's out of earshot, the two make arrangements to get together later for another romp.
At the hospital, Jeff apologizes to Alexis for all the terrible things he said to her when he thought she was the mastermind behind his poisoning, and she assures him that all is forgiven. A nurse rushes over to the waiting room to excitedly announce that Fallon is regaining consciousness! Alexis and Jeff rush after the nurse and hover over Fallon anxiously as she stirs and mumbles, "Peter.." but when she sees her mother, she gets agitated and barks, "Get out of here!" A miffed looking Alexis dejectedly exits the room.
Neil McVane enters Alexis' office to inform her that Blake has been named State Chairman of the Party. He gleefully points out that it means Blake will be privy to whatever political decisions are made in Colorado, which in turn spells success for Denver-Carrington...but doesn't mean anything good for ColbyCo. Alexis breezily tells him she's not going to sweat it, then buzzes Mark to escort "the unemployed congressman" out of the building. LOL. Once McVane is out of earshot, she tells Mark about Blake's new political appointment, then vows to do everything within her power to ensure that he doesn't get that seat.
McVane orders Mark to watch over Alexis like a hawk, 'cause he'd like to blackmail her once she's put her plan to destroy Blake in motion. He cackles about how desperate she'll be to pay him for his silence once her plot has been blown wide open. Sounds like the ex-congressman is in desperate need of a life.
Dr. Walker is examining Fallon. She tells him she doesn't remember much from the accident, and he says she seems fine, save for a slight skull fracture. He checks the reflexes of her arms, and everything seems A-OK in her upper body region...but when he does a reflex check of her feet, she tells him she can't feel anything. She then looks alarmed and cries, "OMG! I can't move my legs!" and Jeff concernedly furrows his caterpillar eyebrows.
Recap: Dr. Winfield calls Blake to let him know that Kirby has finally stabilized. Blake passes the news along to Krystle, who says how great that is, then frowns worriedly and remarks how wigged out he must be over Adam's confession. Blake concurs he is and says he'll confront his son about it tomorrow....then tells her he never would have been able to endure the various storylines of the last several episodes - Kirby's convulsey pregnancy, Allegre's fake kidnapping, Fallon's stoopid romance with Peter - without her love and support. Krystle smiles serenely, coos, "I love you darling", and assures him she'll always be here for her sugar daddy.
Kirby wakes up in her hospital bed in a groggy, confused state. Adam explains that she's been in the hospital for the past few days, and that he's been wringing his hands at her bedside the entire time. Kirby tells him she had a dream that she was holding her baby girl and asks him if it was just a dream...and Adam puts his anguished face on and tells her the doctors tried very hard to save her, but she was too small and weak. Kirby wigs out and shrieks, "Noooo!" and blames herself for the baby's death 'cause of how much she hated her up until the minute before she was born. Adam assures her that his rape spawn must have sensed how much she was loved...and the two hug and weep over what they've just lost.
Fallon summons Claudia to her La Mirage office and tells her that since she and Peter will be honeymooning for the next month or so, she'd like her to take charge of all the upcoming banquets and conventions. Claudia makes a blech face and says she doesn't get why this wedding/honeymoon has to be so madcap, and Fallon giggles and says, "It's my middle name, isn't it?" Claudia gushes about how much she admires everything she's accomplished in her [privileged] life - with the YUGE exception of her engagement to Peter, who gives her a serious case of the heebie-jeebies. When Fallon asks her why Peter icks her out so much, Claudia tells her that he's made passes at her on several occasions. Fallon brushes it off as Peter just being friendly around women, and Claudia shrugs at her stubborn delusion and says it's up to her if that's the way she chooses to see it. Fallon says it is, then coldly tells her to run along now so she can finish up her work.
Tracy's getting it on with her old reporter friend from New York, Jeremy, who writes for the sleazy tabloid rag, The Whisper. She coyly tells him she's picked up some pointers in the sack since moving to Denver...and when he looks intrigued and says he'd like to experience them all, she says they first need to talk business and offers to give him some "hot tips" he can publish in his rag. She poutishly tells him she was cheated out of the top PR job at Denver-Carrington by the boss's trophy wife, and plans to do everything in her power to drag her down. The camera then pans over to her bulletin board, which is filled with newspaper clippings on various salacious stories related to the Carringtons.
Fallon takes a break in her workday and drops by the mansion to spend some quality time with her son. She runs into Jeff, who asks her whaddup with her wedding plans...and she tells him that nothing definite has been scheduled yet, then snaps, "It's none of your business!" Jeff points out that anything that affects their son is his business, and warns her to keep the weird Eurotrash hustler away from anyone named Colby.
Jeff gets a flat tire not far from Carrington manor, so he calls Tony to come and change his tire for him...and Tony quickly drives over in an unbuttoned shirt. I've noticed that he seems to enjoy baring his chest whenever possible. Tony gabbles to Jeff about how upset Blake was when Allegre went missing and worried that he blamed him for the kidnapping...and then the scene cuts to Jeff recounting this conversation to Blake. He tells him that Tony reportedly drank less than a glass of wine before passing out, and Blake solemnly mulls that over and says it's likely he was drugged.
Blake summons Jack, Allegre's trainer and Peter loyalist, to an impromptu interrogation with Jeff and himself. Jack says he was very shaken up when the horse went missing, and recalls that on the night it happened, he was eating pizza and drinking wine with Tony. Blake gets him to confirm that they were the only two people anywhere near the stables on that fateful night...and when Jack leaves the meeting, he looks nervous as he glances around shiftily.
Steven and Claudia are enjoying a buffet lunch at the La Mirage. She's still weirded out by the violets delivery from three days ago, and Steven tells her it's just a sick joke and to forget about it. She tells him that all of this conjuring of memories has made her "see" Lindsay again - ack! - and that she had a vision of her at their Season 1 bungalow decked out in a fancy yellow dress. Steven urges her to forget about the flowers and the weird Lancelot messages, but Claudia tears up and says she can't stand the fact that someone she doesn't know is out there and hates her enough to torment her with tedious violet deliveries.
Steven tells Alexis that some nut has been sending Claudia violets and cards signed Lancelot, and Alexis says it's obviously someone with a perverse mind who's trying to cause her great suffering. When Steven glares at her accusingly, she insists she had nothing to do with it. Steven reminds her she's never liked Claudia, and has never given her enough credit for working through her nuttiness by spending all that much needed time at the Funny Farm. Alexis points out that the worst she's done is level minor criticisms at Claudia concerning her bad mullet hair and frumpy clothes...and that it's a far cry from terrorizing her with strange flower deliveries. She tells Steven she loves him too much to hurt someone he loves and begs him to believe her, and Steven suddenly looks sheepish and apologizes for thinking the worst about her.
Blake orders his secretary Marsha to summon Dex to his office, 'cause he needs to give him a stern talkin' to asap.
Jeff calls up his private investigator, Victor, to ask him to look into Peter's claim that he purchased $2 million dollars worth of diamonds to pay for Allegre's ransom.
When Dex arrives at Denver-Carrington, Blake tells him that his father, Sam Dexter, asked him to have a chat with his misguided son regarding his partnership with Alexis and to do his best to straighten out his head. Blake says it's rumored that he's hitting the sheets with Alexis, and warns him that she'll use him for as long as their business/sexual relationship satisfies her...but eventually she'll do everything she can to destroy and/or get rid of him. Dex seems amused by Blake's dire warning, then shuts him down and says he doesn't want to hear this kind of trash-talk about his lady. He then reveals that his spineless father once told him that he had an affair with Alexis while she was married to him (Blake), and Blake grimly mutters, "First the father, then the son" - eww - and murmurs that his ex-wife is "a real humdinger". Dex says that only he chooses his business and bed partners and declares that he's deeply in love with Alexis. Blake's like, "Blech...but whatever" then shrugs and says he kept his promise to Sam by having this awkward conversation. He wishes the dumb sap luck with his ill-fated relationship, and Dex smugly grins and stalks out of the office.
At the La Mirage restaurant, Claudia tells Alexis about the weird flower deliveries she's been getting and agonizes about who could be so cruel. Alexis suggests she bring the letters to the police so they could try to track down who's been doing this - but Claudia says she's reluctant to do that 'cause she worries they'll think she's just being paranoid and crazy. Alexis tells her that her days of being a Funny Farm patient are behind her, and urges her to leave all that in the past.
Adam drops by Blake's office to report that Kirby is finally out of danger. He then tells Blake that not only did he poison Jeff, but he tricked Alexis into signing purchase papers from The Toxic Paint Store to make it look like she was the culprit. Blake exclaims, "How could you have done that?! You could have killed Jeff!" and Adam says he never intended to kill him - just temporarily weaken his ability to think straight so that Alexis could secure her position as top dog at ColbyCo, thereby earning her love. Blake tells him how dicked up that is, and reminds him that real love can't be bought or negotiated...and Adam says he totally gets that now, and realizes that nothing can make up for his past crimes. He says he's going to 'fess up to Jeff, then return to this office to receive his official punishment. Blake says he has no idea what that will be, and Adam says he'll accept whatever it ends up being.
Blake drops by ColbyCo to apologize to Alexis for ever doubting the love she has for her children...then tells her he knows about Adam poisoning Jeff. He says he needs her help trying to understand their psychotic son, in particular what kind of punishment to dispense (report him to the police? fire him from Denver-Carrington? sternly admonish him?). He cries, "Help meeee!" and Alexis says she totally gets what he's going through, 'cause she went through it herself when she first learned what Adam had done. She tells him she went to Billings to talk to Dr. Edwards and learned that Adam had a nervous breakdown...and before that was a lonely boy with no real family or friends in his life. Blake says he now regrets calling off the search when Adam was kidnapped as an infant, and Alexis tells him it's all in the past now...and that perhaps what Adam needs most is love [and probably some 'round the clock anti-psychotic-tendencies therapy]. Blake thanks her for making time to talk to him 'bout this, then heads over to the elevator...and Alexis stares after him with a pouty, longing look on her face.
Dex is at the penthouse, drinking, when Alexis returns home. He tells her he gave Mark the night off, then jokes that he wants to be the one to guard her body tonight. Alexis tells him she's tired and just wants to be alone tonight, but he's like, "No can do" and decides that it's the ideal moment to propose to her. Alexis tells him it's very sweet that he wants to marry her...and that while she has strong feelings for him, she isn't ready to plunge into a marriage. She tells him she likes their sack-based relationship, but he insists he wants a wife, not just a lover. She's like, "Whatever" and tells him she's not in the mood for lovin' right now 'cause she went through something emotionally heavy with Blake just now...and Dex gets irked and accuses her of not being able to fully let go of Blake. She denies it, they bicker about her denial...blah blah...and she orders him to leave. Dex sternly says he refuses to take no for an answer, then grabs her by the shoulders and forcibly smooches her. He vows to make her forget she ever met Blake, then barks, "How about that?!" and stalks off...leaving her staring after him in kind of a turned on way.
The next morning, Alexis is lounging on her couch, trying to get in touch with her old European pal, Princess Maria Elena. Mark eavesdrops and says he has a hunch that she's trying to screw up things between Fallon and Peter...and Alexis coldly tells him his hunches are unwelcome, and that she's rethinking keeping him on as her bodyguard. Mark bitterly guffaws and says that McVane was right when he predicted she'd eventually try to get rid of him. Alexis says he shouldn't be talking to that washed-up nut, then orders him to get lost. A few seconds later, she gets a return call from Princess Maria Elena and asks her if she remembers a cad named Peter De Vilbis.
Alexis heads straight over to the La Mirage to tell Fallon that Princess Maria Elena told her that Peter dumped her 'cause she was pregnant and refused to have an abortion. Fallon rolls her eyes and says that the princess probably just wanted to trap Peter, and that he refused to be trapped. Mmm...no. Doesn't seem reasonable that a European royal, who's probably in a high enough station in life to have any man she wants, would waste her time trying to trap a low-life playboy like Peter. Alexis reminds Fallon that she has a son, then asks her what she'll do if Peter order her to ditch the kid so they can jet around the world. Fallon insists that Peter loves her and is pretty sure he'll love her son too. LOL. Alexis reminds her that she knows first-hand what it's like to be deprived of her children, then strongly suggests she look into Peter's love/indifference with respect to his future stepson before taking the marital plunge.
Tracy flounces into Krystle's office and shows her an unflattering article about her in The Whisper. Krystle looks at the incorrectly punctuated headline, Are the rich above the law!, then peruses the article, which accuses her of being the spoiled wife of a tycoon who's pretending to be a career lady. Tracy points out that the article includes a juicy tidbit about her marriage to Mark, and her failure to properly divorce him before marrying Blake for the first time. She tells Krystle it's obvious that someone wants to embarrass her, then offers to "go after" that person...but Krystle frowns and tells her it's probably best to leave it alone. Tracy snarkishly disagrees and urges her to fight back, but Krystle remains mute and just stares pensively into space.
Jeff checks in with Victor and learns that, just as he suspected, there was no purchase of $2 million dollars worth of diamonds in Denver on the day Peter claimed the purchase was made. Jeff calls up Blake on his car phone, and the two agree to meet at La Mirage so they can deal with Lyin' Peter together.
Jeff makes a beeline over to Fallon's office and tells her he has proof that Peter is a crook, and that he was the one behind the kidnapping of Allegre...along with Jack, who drugged Tony so there'd be no witnesses. What all of this means, he earnestly spells out to his idiot ex-wife, is that Peter didn't actually put up any ransom money - but instead took Blake's money and has most likely absconded with it. Fallon angrily accuses him of "inventing garbage" against the man she loves, and that she intends to put a stop to it right now. She storms out of her office and heads upstairs to Peter's suite.
Peter's creepy lawyer answers the door and tells Fallon that Peter has left Denver...but that he did leave her a message: don't come looking for me 'cause I have no desire to ever see you again. Ouch. Fallon scrunches her face confusedly and asks him what kind of sick game he's playing, and he tells her that while Peter found her very beautiful and amusing, their romance is over now that he's done with the long con. Fallon remembers what Jeff just told her and asks the lawyer if her father's money has anything to do with this, and he says he's not at liberty to talk 'bout that (so, uh, yes). Fallon wails, "My God!" and has audio flashbacks of all the recent warnings she's received about Peter from various family and friends.
Jeff ambles outside the La Mirage and encounters a drunk hotel guest, who complains to no one in particular about the bartender, who's refusing to serve him. Jeff and the valet uselessly stand there and watch the drunkard stagger over to his car, get in, and weave around the parking lot. Jeff half-heartedly cries out, "Hey! You shouldn't be driving!" just as a weeping Fallon rushes past him. Jeff chases after her and says they need to talk, then corners her at her car - but she refuses to listen to him and pushes him away and runs off...directly into the path of the drunk driver. Jeff lunges at her to push her out of the way - but we don't get to see how that turns out, 'cause the camera abruptly pans over to Blake, who has just arrived at the La Mirage. He looks ashen as he witnesses the horrific accident and exclaims, "My God!"
Recap: Kirby continues to convulse while Dr. Winfield checks her vitals and barks orders at the nurses. A distraught Adam moans, "Oh dear God, please help her.." as Blake hustles him out of the room. In the next scene, the doctor informs the Carringtons that he hopes to have Kirby stabilized within a few hours - since her high blood pressure could cause her brain to implode at any moment. He says that as soon as she stabilizes, he'll perform a Caesarian - and Adam looks alarmed and says the baby isn't fully developed and therefore, as he himself said during the previous episode, wouldn't have a good chance of surviving. The doctor's like, "Well d'yuh", but that since Kirby's life is in serious jeopardy, he can't risk waiting much longer. He urges everyone to go home, since there's nothing any of them can do for Kirby for the next several hours. Blake tells Krystle that tomorrow he has an emergency closed door Energy Studies Commission Meeting in D.C. he probably shouldn't cancel, so he's going to head home and pack for that. Adam insists on overnighting it at the hospital...and when Krystle offers to stay and keep him company, he gives her a grateful hug.
Blake arrives home and tells his manservant he needs him to pack an overnight bag for his D.C. trip...then gets a call from Peter, who's about to fly out of LAX. Blake tells him he still doesn't like the idea of paying a ransom of diamonds to Allegre's kidnappers and keeping the police out of the loop, and Peter snarkishly reminds him that half of the ransom money is his...then says his flight is about to board and abruptly hangs up. Fallon, who has been eavesdropping from the doorway of the study, asks Blake why he's always so dickish to Peter...and Blake tells her he doesn't approve of the way Peter is handling the ransom request, and that (in general) the weirdo is starting to make the hair on his neck stand up. Fallon says she's chosen to ignore all the red flags flapping around her Eurotrashy inamorato and stupidly insists she's marrying a terrific guy - but Blake reminds her how little she knows about him, and that she's proven to be far too impulsive when it comes to marriage, as evidenced by her ill-fated elopement with Jeff in Season 1. Fallon insists that her second marriage has nothing at all to do with Jeff, then snarks at her father to just come out and say he doesn't approve of Peter. Blake tells her he can't formulate an opinion about a man he barely knows, then says he knows and loves her and doesn't want her to get hurt. Fallon poutsishly says that someone has been publicly badmouthing Peter and suspects Jeff - but Blake tells her that, in fact, Alexis has been the one tittering about a nasty scandal that Peter allegedly instigated. He then urges her to pay her mother a visit and learn as much as possible about her creeptastic future husband.
Over at the penthouse, Alexis is daintily eating scrumptious looking delicacies from a silver tray and admitting to Fallon that, yep, she's been telling anyone who will listen that Peter De Vilbis is a shady, soulless, shell of a hard-hearted douchewad. She says she was in Mallorca when she witnessed Peter publicly dump his rich young fiancee then jet off to Monte Carlo with a sexy starlet...and when the fiancee heard about the starlet, she tried to commit suicide. She tells Fallon she's very concerned about her hooking up with such a callous troll, but Fallon snaps, "Stay out of my life!", says she doesn't trust a word that comes out of her mouth, and reminds her of that weird scene when she crawled into Mark's bed while he was in the shower so that she could "catch her in the act" enjoying a glass of post-coital champagne. LOL. That awesome scene was as ickily repugnant as it was delicious to watch. She accuses Alexis of being jealous of her happiness, since she hasn't been able to find joy with a man since Blake threw her out of Carrington manor. Ouch. Mark emerges from his servant's hovel and stares at the ugly scene with an amused expression on his face...but Fallon ignores him as she whirls around, barks at her mother once more to stay out of her life, and flounces towards the elevator.
Krystle asks Blake if he'd like her to fly to D.C. with him, but he tells her he'd prefer it if she held down the fort at home - considering everything that's going on with Kirby, Allegre, and his idiot daughter. He then stares contemplatively into space and mutters, "Maybe I'm wrong about Peter...hopefully." Right. 'Cause he always seems like such a normal, non-creepish, appropriate kind of guy.
Jeff spots Peter at the La Mirage bar and offers a sarcastic congratulations about his impending nuptials. Peter grunts thank you...then looks irked when Jeff sits beside him and lectures him about giving Fallon flying lessons. Peter argues that Fallon is determined to learn how to fly...and that he's her instructor - in air and in bed - (ew), and Jeff dry-heaves in disgust and gives him a hard smack across the face, which was soooo super awesome to watch. The two start taking swings at each other until Fallon rushes over and breaks it up...then shames Jeff for not spending more of his spare time at the hospital with his convulsing wife.
Over at the hospital, a stressed looking Dr. Winfield is working overtime trying to stabilize Kirby. I think it's time to seriously consider unplugging her.
Alexis and Mark return to the penthouse after a night at the opera, and the two share a drink and compliment each other's hotness. Alexis asks him if he misses the days of yore when they used to regularly indulge in nooners...but instead of letting him answer, she seductively asks him to take off her gaudy necklace. He obediently does and then lifts her little hat veil (LOL) so he can lean in for a kiss - but she abruptly pulls away and instructs him to take the necklace to the jeweller's and get the clasp fixed 'cause it's been bothering her all night. Mark's all, "Wha-a?" ... and when Alexis ignores him and struts across the room to go upstairs to bed, he and his deflated penis dejectedly shuffle off.
Fallon and Peter are going at it in front of the fireplace in his La Mirage suite, which...ew. He orders her to tell him how happy she is that he's back from LA ('cause that's not weird)...and a few seconds later, he gets a call from the fake kidnappers. Peter tells them he has the $2 million in diamonds, as per the bizarre instructions, then warns whoever's on the other end not to harm the poor horse. After he hangs up, he tells Fallon he just received instructions on where to deliver the diamonds in exchange for Allegre...and Fallon offers to go with him in the absence of Blake, who's in D.C. on business. Peter refuses to endanger her, then caresses her face and orders her to wait in the suite so she doesn't put two and two together and figure out that he's up to no good.
Adam is pacing the hospital's waiting room when Jeff drops by to report that he looked in on Kirby and is keeping his fingers crossed that she'll somehow make it through this endless pregnancy-in-crisis storyline. He then remarks on how they've been enemies since their first interaction in the Siblings episode and admits to resenting his presence in ColbyCo and dickishly attempting to put him in his place. He assures Adam that he [is totally brushing off the fact that he's a vile rapist and] now sees him as an equal...but that all of their past cockswinging is unimportant in light of what's now happening with Kirby. Jeff recalls the way he blamed him for the poisoning that made him act so squirrelly for much of Season 3...and that it was later proven to be Alexis' doing. He apologizes for "wrongly" accusing him, and a mute Adam stares back at him with a stricken look on his face.
Jeff and Krystle share a brandy in the study and have a heart-to-heart. He laments that he had no right to marry Kirby...and that he's caused her nothing but heartache, since he's still in love with Fallon. He then stares mournfully into space and says it's not over with his fickle ex...but Krystle scrunches her face confusedly and says it has to be, 'cause her life is currently going in another direction. Jeff says he's pretty sure that Peter is going to hurt her, and that he feels helpless 'cause he can't do anything about it...and Krystle just stares back at him, her face contorted in her default expression of pensive concern.
Adam is sleeping in the waiting room at the hospital, dreaming and crying out, "Kirrrrrrby!" The nurse pokes him awake and asks him if he's OK...and he stares bewilderedly into space, then says he needs to see Kirby, pronto. When he enters her room, Dr. Winfield has determined that her blood pressure is still too high, then barks at the nurses to transport her to Intensive Care STAT! Adam encourages the unconscious Kirby to continuing fighting to keep herself and their rape spawn alive.
Fallon and Peter happily inform Blake that Allegre is back in his stable, safe and sound. Blake is irked that no one called him regarding the ransom drop-off, and insists that he had been reachable in D.C. Fallon pissily tells him he should be more grateful to Peter for risking his life to handle this crisis...and Blake sheepishly apologizes and says he's just happy that the horse is back.
Over at the stables, the trainer assures Blake that Allegre is fine and shows no sign of mistreatment. When the police sergeant arrives, Peter gives him his account of the ransom drop-off...after which he was told he could find Allegre in a nearby pasture. The sergeant is annoyed that he wasn't informed about the initial, scrapbook-esque ransom letter and snarks, "Maybe they don't play it that way where you're from" and Peter puffs up his little chest and nonsensically replies, "Maybe you don't know who you're talking to. I'm Peter De Vilbis. I'm not vun ov zuh trash you usually deal vis." Fallon quickly ushers Peter out of the stable and stubbornly refuses to get a clue about how weird he acts in every fucking situation...and Jeff quietly remarks to Blake that Peter's continued bitchiness is very odd, considering that the horse has been returned. Blake mulls that over and solemnly replies, "Maybe there's more to Peter than any of us knows."
Tracy tells Blake that, according to her secret sources, an oil rich plot in Wyoming owned by Oscar Stone was just purchased by Lex-Dex, Inc. Blake says he's deeply impressed by her loyalty and overall work performance, and Tracy flirtily giggles and says, "I'll be sure to keep it up!" and compliments the "lovely warmth" emanating from him that always makes her feel so welcome at Denver-Carrington. OMFG, I can't even fathom where the writers think they're going with this unholy flirtation.
Disgraced ex-Congressman Neil McVane arrives at ColbyCo after being summoned by Alexis. She shoots him a smug smirk and reminds him that he tried to strangle her in this very office, and he sheepishly says it happened a long time ago and hopes she can just let bygones be bygones. Alexis is like, "Er, not" and tells him she's looking to hire a D.C.-based consultant for when her Canadian tar sands deal comes through...and McVane perks up and reminds her of how well connected he is in D.C. Alexis rattles off the names of two prospective consultants and asks him which of them he'd recommend, and McVane looks crestfallen and tells her that he would be the best person for the job and barks, "You owe me!" Alexis says she doesn't owe him a damn thing...and a few seconds later, Mark enters her office to drop off her newly repaired necklace. Not sure why he wouldn't have just taken it straight to the penthouse. Alexis orders him to escort the ex-Congressman out of the building...and when McVane protests about being dicked around purely for her amusement, she growls, "Get out of my sight, you miserable has-been!"
Mark escorts McVane to the nearest strip club, and the two order a drink and moan about the shittiness of living sad, testicle-free lives under Alexis' thumb. McVane openly tells Mark he'd kill Alexis if killing wasn't too good for her...but figures he can bring her to her knees by hitting her in the checkbook. Mark says he doesn't want to hear him trash-talking his boss, so McVane reminds him that Alexis had him arrested after he rescued her from the cabin fire...then warns him that Alexis will throw him away like yesterday's news once he's outlived his usefulness to her.
Kirby is being wheeled into surgery for a Cesarean. Steven comforts Adam, assuring him she'll be OK...then regales him with stories of how brave and sassy Kirby was when they were kids...blah blah. Adam thanks him for his kindness and says it's nice to have a brother, then grimly says, "It'll take a miracle to get Kirby through this."
Dex sexily strides into Alexis' office after spending the day in Utah, and gives her an intense smooch. He tells her that Blake has summoned him to Denver-Carrington, but assures her that nothing and no one will kibosh their land deal with Oscar Stone.
Claudia is chatting with Krystle at the La Mirage when she gets another delivery of violets with a Love, Lancelot note. Ugh. This again. Looking ashen-faced, she explains to Krystle that Matthew used to send her violets and that her nickname for him was Lancelot (despite it never being in the script throughout the entire first season), then recalls the last time she saw Matthew - the Season 1 finale when he mercifully absconded with Lindsey off-camera. She asks Krystle if she's seen him since then...and, if so, does he hate her for marrying a gay straight man? Krystle gives her a funny look and reminds her that Matthew was killed off after his storyline was deemed by producers to be lame-ass and unwatchable, but Claudia says she has doubts that he's really really dead, and is worried he's trying to punish her. She wonders if it's possible for Lindsey to still be alive [OMFG...I sure as shit hope not], then gets teary and clutches the violets.
Dex admits to Blake that he and Alexis (aka Lex-Dex, Inc.) signed a deal with Oscar Stone, and Blake snarkishly reminds him that he's on the board of Denver-Carrington - which makes such a deal a YUGE conflict of interest, and threatens to kick him off the board. Dex shrugs, challenges him to do it, says his joint ventures are none of his business, and stalks out of his office. A few seconds later, Blake's secretary buzzes to inform him that Kirby was just taken into surgery...and Blake's like, "Ack!" and immediately rushes over to the hospital.
Adam is in the chapel, praying for Kirby, when Blake enters and seats himself beside him in the pew. Adam natters about how alone he feels deep inside 'cause of what a psychotic shithead he's been since first appearing on Dynasty...then confesses to being the mastermind behind Jeff's paint poisoning. Blake scrunches his face in confusion and says that can't be 'cause he saw Alexis' name on the toxic paint purchase order, and Adam explains that he duped Alexis into signing it...and fervently hopes he can be forgiven. As Blake processes the shocking confession, Dr. Winfield enters the chapel to inform them that Kirby is alive...but that her baby girl didn't make it. Adam looks tormented and starts wailing, and a discombobulated looking Blake half-heartedly pats him on the shoulder. Awkward.
Recap: The police arrive at Carrington Farms to investigate the abduction of Allegre. A police sergeant questions Krystle and Blake...and then Tony ambles over and says he didn't see or hear a thing. The sergeant looks skeptical and asks him if he tied one on last night, and Tony admits he had a little wine with his pizza before falling asleep.
Kirby is tossing, turning, and moaning in her sleep. Jeff pokes his head inside her bedroom - but when he sees Adam hovering at her bedside, he wisely tiptoes back out. Kirby wakes up and whines about how annoying it is to just lay around, but Adam urges her to rest and get her blood pressure under control. He coos at her reassuringly and says that somehow they'll all get through this OK. Kirby wonders aloud why she should marry him, so he reminds her she's carrying his rape spawn...plus she no longer has a husband, father, or any friends to speak of. He caresses her face and says they're all each other has in the world, and she helplessly concedes that sad fact and drifts off to sleep.
Allegre's trainer (Jack) laments to Fallon and Peter about how sorry he is that the horse vanished from his stall. Peter dickishly snaps, "You ah not paid to vatch television" - and Fallon tut tuts him for his uncalled-for bitchitude and says they really can't blame Jack for Allegre's disappearance. The sergeant then walks over and tells Peter and Blake that he needs to speak with them privately.
In the study, the sergeant asks Blake and Peter to disclose whatever info they might have about their enemies...and when they both scrunch their faces in pretend confusion, the sergeant says there's no way that wealthy, powerful, dickish men such as themselves wouldn't have pissed off a lot of people on their way to the top. Blake argues that the horse's disappearance is most likely about getting a ransom, then barks at the sergeant to stop his witch hunt for enemies and focus on horse kidnappers. Instead of telling Blake where he can shove his unsolicited advice on how to conduct an official police investigation, the sergeant meekly nods...which, gaaa!
Alexis is dressed in a scarily poofy pink ball gown for a night out at the ballet, which seems overly dressy...but OK. After trying to track down Dex by phone, he arrives at her penthouse a few minutes later looking dirty and disheveled from scouting oil fields all day. He tells her he found some land in Wyoming that has five working oil wells - and that it's owned by some old coot who hasn't been paying his bills and is currently facing foreclosure. Alexis perks up and says they can go to the ballet any old time and insists they fly out to Wyoming asap and convince the old coot to sell them his property. An exhausted Dex suggests they wait until morning, then starts stripping off his clothes...and Alexis looks all into his naked form - including his freakishly hairy back - and the two rub up against each other and start going at it.
Over at Carrington manor, Claudia is studying the note that came with the delivery of violets she received during the previous episode when Steven enters the room carrying a bottle of champagne and two glasses. He asks her why she hasn't thrown the violets away yet, and she spacily replies, "I didn't want to let go of them." Steven reminds her that they were sent by someone who clearly has a sick, perverted mind...and that since she's a Carrington, it's inevitable that people are going to take shots at her. He then takes the flowers and accompanying note and tosses them into the fireplace...and Claudia does her best to not start twitching, and assures him that she's still in her happy place.
Adam tells Jeff they need to talk, then apologizes for raping Kirby and for his general dickwadishness this season. That said, he reminds Jeff that he never really loved Kirby, and that their marriage was a rebound 'cause he's never fully gotten over Fallon. He implores Jeff to be reasonable, then holds out his hand...and Jeff stares at it disdainfully for a few seconds before finally shaking it.
Kirby wakes up and tries to pour herself a drink with a heavy glass pitcher (Tupperware would have been so much lighter) - but when her hands start shaking uncontrollably, she's all, "Ack!" and drops the pitcher onto the floor. Jeff hears the glass shattering and runs into her room to see whassup. Kirby wails that her hands won't stop convulsing, and Jeff urges her to chillax...and a few seconds later, Adam bursts into the room. He's aghast at the sight of Kirby's out-of-control hands and barks at Jeff to call the doctor.
Kirby is admitted into the hospital...and after examining her, Dr. Winfield tells Jeff (and Adam who's also standing there) that Kirby has preeclampsia, which could possibly lead to organ failure or a stroke. He adds that Kirby is additionally screwed 'cause he's unable to perform a Caesarian until the spawn is more developed. Adam demands to know what he's going to do, and Dr. Winfield chides him for interrupting him while he tells the father whassup...and Adam puffs up his little chest and announces that he's the baby daddy. Dr. Winfield's all, "Wha-a?" and stares at Adam and Jeff in mute bewilderment.
Fallon and Peter arrive at La Mirage and are besieged by reporters who pepper them with questions about Allegre's kidnapping. When they quickly bore of the poor horse's plight, they ask the lovebirds how they met and if someone introduced them, and Peter brusquely declares, "She vill zoon be Mrs. Peter De Vilbis". When Fallon widens her eyes and is all, "Wha-a?!" one of the reporters cheerily remarks that it looks like the impending marriage is news to the bride...and Peter goes, "Really? Judge vor yourzelves" then pulls Fallon toward him and gives her a grotesque smooch. The reporters chuckle delightedly and cackle about how much fun it's going to be to cover yet another lavish Carrington wedding. I can only assume that this must be one slow news day in Denver.
Kirby wakes up in her hospital bed and finds - ack! - Blake and Krystle hovering over her. She moans about how afraid she is of falling asleep in case something bad happens, but Krystle smilingly assures her that everything is going to be A-OK. Blake ambles out to the waiting room and finds Adam glumly staring into space. Blake urges him to go home and get some rest, but Adam insists on staying so he can be near his beloved, who he says he now regrets assaulting. Blake tells him he's making up for it now, and Adam wails, "Can I?" then remarks that whenever he loves someone, he ends up smothering them and frightening them away. Blake says that [hopefully] his psychotic behavior is all in the past, and Adam concurs and vows to give Kirby the kind of un-smothering, non-violent affection she deserves.
Blake tells Krystle that the doctors have managed to stabilize Kirby...and now that that's settled, he's hoping for some good news about Allegre. He then frowns and expresses dismay about Peter's proposal to Fallon on live TV and says there's something about the guy he can't quite put his finger on ['cause, yeah, it's just so hard to see that weirdo for the Eurotrashy, brazen con artist he is]. He sighs, now regretting his irresponsibleness in raising Fallon to be an impulsive brat who grabs at what she wants without ever thinking it through.
Fallon joins Jeff in the mansion's breakfast room. He glumly congratulates her on her impending nuptials, and Fallon gabbles about how much she looooves Peter's style. Jeff makes a seriously? face and asks her why the douche would propose to her so publicly, and Fallon doesn't have a retort for that and tells Jeff he's just going to have to get used to her and Peter being a couple. She credits her fiance with being a hardworking man who's earned everything he has - unlike him (Jeff) who just got handed everything from a rich uncle. Jeff flinches at the bitchy comparison and starts to storm off in disgust - and Fallon hastily apologizes and sheepishly says she didn't mean what she just said. He snaps, "Save it!" and says he knows she meant exactly what she said.
Alexis and Dex are hanging in a Wyoming bar with Oscar Stone, the landowner they're trying to cut a deal with. Alexis, who's decked out in a fantastic brown leather jacket and pants, coos to Oscar about how attractive he is (not), then purrs at him to accept their offer. Oscar scrunches his face in deep contemplation and says he can't make up his mind all quick-like 'cause there's another party interested in buying his land. Alexis fake brightens and chirps, "I'm in the mood for dancing!" - LOL - and invites Oscar to hit the dance floor with her. Oscar bounds down the stairs and gets the resident fiddler and guitar player to start playing a high-energy folk song...and a dismayed Dex creepily watches them from a few feet away. After several minutes of fancy footwork, square dance style - ye haw! - the musicians dial it down with a slow song, and Alexis allows Oscar to press against her while they sway to the music. He drunkenly asks her if she'll take good care of his land if he sells it to her, and she replies, "Of course!" then whispers something in his ear that makes him cackle with delight. She then sashays over to Dex and covertly explains that closing this deal will require her to either sing for Oscar or sleep with him - and since there's no way in hell she's hitting the sheets with the dumb yokel, a performance it is. She then takes the stage, sits astride a chair that's facing backwards, and belts out Boys in the Backroom. Everyone in the bar cheers at her sassy performance.
Steven drops by the study to see whassup with Blake...and Blake tells him he's bummed about his kidnapped horse and could use a drink. As he pours two brandies, Steven gabbles about how comfortable he feels in the mansion now that he's no longer living the gay lifestyle that always grated on the homophobic douchewad and sparked so many tedious arguments between them - in this very study. He asks Blake if he has any problem with him living at Carrington manor and working for Alexis at ColbyCo, and Blake chuckles and says he deeply admires his fierce sense of independence, and urges him to never lose it. He assures him it's totes fine with him to continue his job at ColbyCo, and Steven thanks him for being so understanding and raises his glass in the air before taking a sip.
In a cheap Wyoming motel room, Alexis and Dex celebrate the contracts they were finally able to persuade Oscar to sign. Dex compliments her shrewd dealmaking abilities and says he'd really like to get it on with her once he's had a shower. He strips off his clothes and strides into the bathroom naked, and Alexis grins with horny delight as she checks out his taut buttocks and freakishly hairy back, then also gets naked and joins him in the shower.
Peter is loafing in Fallon's office at the La Mirage when Claudia enters and is all, "Ack!" when she sees him creepily standing there. Peter smirkingly asks her if she's going to congratulate him, and she snorts with disgust and says that Fallon is very important to her, and that she doesn't want to see her get hurt. She snarls about seeing him "in action", meaning he makes passes at any woman who's handy...then scowls at his obnoxious smirking and says it probably wouldn't be very funny to Fallon. Peter continues to smirk and says, "About making passes. You mean zomezing like zis?" and pulls her toward him for a forcible smooch - but Claudia pulls away, smacks him across the face, and storms out.
Mark runs into Fallon at the La Mirage bar and scoffs about how wonderful it is to see money marry money. Fallon says that her deep love for Eurotrash has nothing to do with money...and when he asks, "What does it have to do with then?" she flounces away without answering.
At Denver-Carrington, Blake receives a note from Allegre's kidnapper, which is pieced together using cut out letters and numbers. Looks like it was a fun scrapbooking-type project. Krystle bursts into his office after being urgently summoned, and he hands her the note: $2,000,000 in diamonds or Allegre is shot. No cops. Blake grimaces and says he doesn't like those terms one bit - LOL - but Peter announces that he will pay the entire ransom himself. His lawyer concurs and says they'll call the cops once the horse has been returned (not). Blake doesn't like the sound of that plan, but easily caves in.
Tracy is at the La Mirage, having lunch with her old boss, Bill Rockwell. Bill tells her that his new PR firm is doing very well and offers to hire her. He promises an excellent salary and loads of responsibilities, but Tracy declines and says she's headed for the top at Denver-Carrington. Bill looks skeptical and reminds her that Blake is never going to fire or demote Krystle - but Tracy says she doubts that Krystle will be an employee for much longer, then dishes to him that she had an appointment with Dr. Winfield, an obstetrician. She figures that Krystle wants to have a baby, which means she'll probably quit Denver-Carrington soon to be a full-time mother. Tracy says she's next in line for the top PR job, and Bill asks her if she has her eye on the boss as well - ew! gross! - then cheekily reminds her that she followed a similarly slutty path when she came to work for him. Meow, Bill.
Kirby tells Krystle she's feeling much better, and Krystle smiles serenely and says they all love her and will see her through this preeclampsia crisis. Kirby thanks her for always being there for her, especially through the hard times...and Krystle tells her how obvious it is that Adam wants this baby. Kirby concurs - then suddenly shrieks that she has a horrible pain in her head . She cries, "It's bursting! I can't stand it!" and Krystle races into the hall to summon help...and then Adam and Blake burst in, aghast at the sight of Kirby clutching her head and crying in pain. She continues to wig out while the nurse takes her blood pressure...and that's where the episode abruptly ends. Weird.
Recap: Kirby's at the doctor's office, having her pupils checked and blood pressure taken...while Krystle waits for her in the waiting room. The doctor tells Kirby she has mild preeclampsia and prescribes bed rest, and warns that if she doesn't stay off her feet, she may have to be hospitalized. Kirby thanks him, then goes back into the waiting room and fibs to Krystle when she tells her that her fingers are only sausage-like 'cause she's suffering from tension.
Jeff breaks the news to Blake that he and Kirby are divorcing due to irreconcilable differences. Blake chides him for throwing away a marriage when a child is involved, but Jeff just kind of shrugs and says he's moving ahead with the divorce nonetheless. Blake offers to act as a mediator to help them resolve their differences, and Jeff somehow refrains from laughing at the idea of this belligerent old goat acting as a marriage counsellor, and politely tells him there's no possible way that his and Kirby's deeply-rooted [rape spawn] problems can be sorted out.
On the way to the stables, Krystle tells Blake that Kirby is just suffering from tension, and Blake furrows his brows and grumbles about how irresponsible she and Jeff are being in getting divorced, and adds that he gets the feeling Jeff is hiding something. Krystle stays mum about Kirby's rapist baby daddy quagmire, and the two mount their horses and trot off for an afternoon ride.
Fallon and Peter are canoodling naked in front of the fire in her La Mirage suite, soaking up some post-coitus afterglow. She gushes about how he's brought some much needed excitement into her life...and this emboldens Peter into unveiling his cocaine stash. Fallon looks puzzled and asks whassup with that, and he replies, "I think you should have a real party" but Fallon says she's not into snorting blow 'cause she's seen too many people ruin their lives with the powdery poison. She holds up her glass and says she's happy to stick with guzzling champagne. Peter says he finds coke to be very stimulating, and smugly says he'll eventually get her to change her mind about powdering the inside of her nose. Ack! Red flag alert, Fallon.
Alexis, who's gussied up in a shimmery white gown, calls the La Mirage restaurant to have a large bottle of Dom Perignon sent to the table where Steven, Claudia, Blake, and Krystle are celebrating Steven's birthday. Mark enters the living room and idly asks whassup, and Alexis smugly replies, "Keeping people off balance." Mark's like, "OK, whatevs" and says he's off to the gym...and passes Dex as he enters the penthouse decked out in a tuxedo. Alexis irritably reminds him that they were supposed to meet at the party/charity event, but Dex says he thought it would be much nicer if he picked her up and they made a dramatically grand entrance together. He notices that she's wearing the gaudy necklace he gave her during the previous episode and says it deeply pleases him, and she admits she's becoming fond of him too and gives him a sexy squeeze. Dex stares at her with creepish intensity and says he's a lot more than just fond of her, then breathlessly declares, "I'm falling in love with you." Alexis tells him not to say that 'cause it might spoil things between them...but then cancels her limo and gives him a long smooch.
During Steven's birthday dinner, Blake steps away from the table to talk to Fallon, who's stumbling around the La Mirage bar clutching a bottle of champagne. He tells her it looks weird for the hotel's owner to be openly carrying booze while visibly drunk, and she breezily explains that she's on her way to a friend's [coke and champagne] party.
The next morning at Carrington manor, Krystle tells Blake she's concerned about him sticking his big fat nose in Jeff's and Kirby's impending divorce - and Blake agrees that it's in no way his business to interfere in the lives of these adults and promises to back off. That is...uncharacteristically self-aware and considerate of him. Krystle tells him she'll meet him downstairs...and once he's out of hearing range, she gets on the phone and confirms her doctor's appointment for later that day.
Fallon enters the breakfast room, says good morning to Blake, and that she wants to discuss Adam - namely the obnoxious way he's trying to push her around while she's trying to do "something special and beautiful" at the La Mirage. Blake points out that the costs for the new addition are unnecessarily high, but Fallon insists she'll earn the money back from satisfied hotel guests and doesn't believe, as Adam does, that Peter's architect is being too extravagant. Blake says that Adam is super smart about real estate, and that he's been warned about Peter being a high roller - which is fine when he's risking his own funds, but he doesn't want Eurotrash to be influencing her. Fallon objects to the word influence, so Blake backs down and says he'll go over the cost sheets himself and talk to Peter as an impartial observer. Fallon goes, "Fine" and flounces off to the stables.
Fallon snarkishly orders Tony to have Sampson ready for her to ride this afternoon - but Tony warns her that Sampson is far too frisky a filly to safely ride. Jeff, who's also hanging around the stables, concurs. Fallon says she can take care of herself, then smugly mentions that Peter is giving her a flying lesson later. Jeff says he doesn't like the sound of that, and Fallon accuses him of objecting to her having a new lover...and Jeff looks icked out by the disturbing visual as he stares concernedly into space.
Krystle tells her doctor - the same doctor Kirby saw earlier - that she's pensively upset with him for agreeing with Dr. Miller's findings, which are that she's as barren as the Sahara. He tells her that due to her uterus being all out of whack, she might possibly get pregnant, but won't likely be able to carry the baby to term. With that settled, he asks her how Kirby's bed rest is going, and Krystle's all, "Bed rest? Wha-a??" and tells him that, other than the sausage fingers, she had no idea anything was seriously wrong with her. The doctor tells her it's imperative that Kirby spend the rest of her pregnancy days resting, otherwise the consequences could be dire.
Blake asks Tracy if Krystle is in, and Tracy tells him that she had some kind of mysterious appointment. He grimaces and says that the Energy Studies Commission meeting just got moved up, and he needs his PR Director on hand in case the Commission people put him on the spot. Tracy dutifully jots down the new time and place of the meeting and promises to leave the message for Krystle...but when Blake leaves the office, she places the message onto the floor and smiles evilly.
Adam returns to Carrington manor to fetch some papers he forgot. He hears a weird noise coming from the nearby sitting room and quickly dashes over. He finds Kirby with her head slumped onto the piano keys - which was kind of a funny visual - so he picks her up, lugs her over to the hall, and calls for help. Krystle happens to enter the mansion at that moment, goes, "Ack!", and immediately calls the doctor.
Just before the Energy Studies Commission meeting is set to begin, Blake is pacing in front of the meeting room, checking his watch. Tracy arrives and tells Blake that Krystle never returned to the office, but that she'd be more than happy to fill in. He thanks her for her diligence...and then she gets all close and personal as she flirtily straightens his tie. OMFG the horror. He gigglingly thanks her, and the two head inside the meeting room.
Adam watches as Baby Blake and Danny are being spoon fed by their nannies, and grins at the cuteness. Maid Jeannette walks by and remarks to Adam how beautiful the little Carrington heirs are, and Adam spacily contemplates the notion of Carrington heirs as he makes his way upstairs to see Kirby.
Adam urges Kirby to remain on bed rest, then asks her why she ignored the doctor's orders. She rambles something about ever since the baby was conceived, they deserve whatever happens to them...and Adam says that what they deserve is a wonderful child. He chides her for endangering her health and declares that their baby will be a Carrington. Furthermore, he no longer wants to hide the truth of the baby's paternity, and plans to announce to everyone that he's the baby daddy. When he proposes marriage again, Kirby stares back at him with a forlorn, defeated expression.
Blake pops into Krystle's office to let her know she missed the Energy Studies Commission meeting this afternoon. She's all, "Wha-a?" but he tells her it's A-OK 'cause Tracy stood in for her perfectly. He says that Tracy left her a note about the meeting change, but Krystle looks around her desk and says there's no note. After Blake is called away to take a call from the governor, Krystle summons Tracy and asks her what happened to the note regarding the meeting. Tracy plays dumb and says she left it atop her desk...so Krystle looks around and finally spots it on the floor. She snarks, "How did it get down there?!" and Tracy looks fake contrite and says she must have forgotten to weigh the note down...and a draft must have blown it off the desk. Krystle irritably snaps that she got back to the office in plenty of time to attend the earlier scheduled meeting, and Tracy cowers and whimpers, "You're angry." Krystle backs off and assures her it's all fine, and thanks her for filling in. Tracy thanks her for being so understanding, then smirks to herself as she flounces out of the room.
Blake is annoyed when he learns that Peter has stood him up at their meeting. Peter's lawyer explains that Eurotrash had to suddenly jet off to Chicago to check out a hotel he's interested in purchasing. Blake grumbles to the lawyer about all the money that's being wasted at La Mirage on frivolities, so the lawyer explains that Peter likes to add luxurious surprises for his rich guests. Blake doesn't look at all impressed by that and tells the lawyer he needs to talk to Peter personally.
Kirby is in bed, reading, when Jeff drops by for a visit. He says he had no idea she was so ill, and that he would never have agreed to a divorce if he'd known. He offers to call it off so he isn't walking out on her while she's bedridden, but Kirby snaps, "It's a little late for white knights" and tells him she's made other plans. She announces that once their divorce is final, she's going to marry Adam. Ew! Gross! Blech! Jeff furrows his caterpillar brows and goes, "WHAT?!! Are you crazy?!" and Kirby's like, "Well, d'yuh."
Over in the study, Blake bellows, "You raped that girl?!" and Adam "explains" that he and Kirby were two very lonely people who had too much champagne. Blake growls, "Don't give me any damned excuses!" and says that rape is an act of violence and abuse. He says if this were another time, he'd horsewhip him and brand him an animal...kind of like what should have happened to him after he raped Krystle in Season 1, the boorish hypocrite. When Blake learns that Kirby's baby is a result of the assault, he realizes that this icky secret must have been the thing that Jeff declined to tell him. Adam then tells his father that, completely insane as it may be, Kirby has agreed to marry him. As Blake moodily stares into the fireplace, Adam offers to take Kirby and their spawn and move to Billings - but Blake snaps, "No! You're not going anywhere!" and orders him to stay at Carrington manor and learn what it is to behave like a man, a Carrington. LOL. Adam agrees to stay, tells Blake he loves him, and promises to change his rapey ways. He imploring adds, "Please belieeeeeve me" then flees the room, leaving Blake staring concernedly into space.
Alexis tells Steven she's irked that he's moving into Carrington manor, so Steven explains that he's putting the safety of his child above all else. Alexis says they could still move into a duplex in her building, but Steven points out that he and Claudia would still have to take the baby to a public park, whereas Carrington manor has extensive grounds on which Danny can safely play. When he tells her his mind is made up, Alexis poutishly retorts, "Well, as long as it's your decision - not your wife's" then accuses him of indulging Claudia's fears and paranoia. She asks Steven if he's ever even seen this strange man from the park, then reminds him that Claudia has a history of mental squirreliness and did time at the funny farm on two separate occasions. Steven admits he's never seen the creepy park man, but insists that Claudia has a firm grip on reality. Alexis drops the issue and assures him she'll always be around to help him with his problems.
Blake, Krystle, Fallon, and Peter are at the track in Los Angeles, watching Allegre race. It's a nail-biter (not really), and the four loudly cheer when Allegre wins, then get a group photo taken with the jockey. Fallon gushes to Krystle about how exciting this is, and Krystle asks her if things between her and Peter are serious. Fallon says they are, and that she'd totes marry him in a heartbeat if he asked. Yikes. I guess she wasn't as turned off by the coke as I'd be.
Adam whines to Blake about how slowly Kirby's/Jeff's divorce is going, and Blake wryly says he should know first-hand how glacial the pace of these things can be, him being a lawyer and all. When Krystle enters the dining room, Gerard brings in a telephone and tells her she has a mystery caller...and when she looks alarmed, Blake mans up and says he'll answer. The caller tells him to check on Allegre, then abruptly hangs up...and in the next scene, everyone rushes over to the stables to see whassup. They're shocked to discover that Allegre has disappeared. The distressed trainer says that someone must have come into the night and stole - nay, kidnapped - the horse. Eeeek! The camera pans from face to face - Krystle, Blake, Fallon, Peter, Tony - and they all look suitably concerned. Krystle, of course, looks pensively concerned.
A mystery man buys violets in a flower shop, then leaves the store without collecting his change.
Steven and Claudia are packing up the rest of their things from the apartment...then get amorous and start canoodling on the bed. Nope, still no heterosexual chemistry there. They're interrupted by the doorbell, and find a small box on the doorstep with Claudia's name on it. She brings it inside, opens it, and finds violets. She remarks that it's been a very long time since anyone sent her violets...and when she reads the message on the card - Remember? Lancelot - she's like, "OMG!" She explains to Steven that Matthew always used to send her violets [though never during Season 1], and that Lancelot was the nickname she gave him when they were first married. Steven stupidly replies, "But Matthew is dead" and deduces that someone must have sent her the violets as a practical joke. Claudia looks rattled and wails, "Who would do this to meeee?!" and Steven's like, "I dunno" and gives her a comforting hug.
Recap: Krystle is enjoying a swim in a private pool (courtesy of the Rio honeymoon hotel) while Blake stands nearby and creepily watches. A few minutes later, she climbs out of the pool - revealing her freakishly leggy, lean physique - and Blake hands her a thick bathrobe and then gives her a from-behind canoodle. A small army of servants and musicians file in to deliver food and live music...and they're followed by the manager of the hotel. He tells them he just spoke to Peter De Vilbis (the owner of the hotel, apparently) and that he ordered him to personally ensure that their honeymoon is as romantic and special as humanly possible...and Blake and Krystle coo, "Oooh! That's so niiice of him!" The manager tells the newlyweds to enjoy the local delicacies and traditional Brazilian music, then saunters off. Blake gazes at Krystle and asks her if she's hungry - 'cause if she's not, he's hungry for something that ain't food, which...gross. He then grins at her goofily, and the two smooch intensely for what seems like a really looooong time.
Jeff is packing up his stuff from his/Kirby's bedroom when Kirby enters and snaps, "Not wasting any time, are we?" and Jeff's like, "Well d'yuh, you're the one who desperately wants a divorce." She asks him to call Andy so he can get the divorce ball rolling, and he's like, "Can do" ... and after he exits the bedroom, Kirby bursts into tears.
Mark is transporting Alexis' suitcases from her bedroom to the penthouse's living room when Dex emerges from the private elevator. It's funny how the concierge seems to allow this non-resident to saunter in and out of Alexis' private living space without permission. Mark tells him his boss is out - but that as soon as she returns, they have plans to jet off to Rio. Dex orders Mark to bring her suitcases back upstairs, but Mark shoots him the stink-eye and says he's Mrs. Colby's lackey, not his. Dex snaps, "Fine" then grabs the bags and says he'll do it himself, and Mark punches him in the face...and soon the two men are brawling in the living room. A few seconds later, Alexis arrives home and demands to know what the hell is going on here, and Mark snaps, "I was just showing him the way out." Dex says he dropped by to stop her from making a fool of herself, then implores her to stop wasting time on bitter memories [of a man who clearly can't stand the sight of her] and let go of the past already fer fuck's sake. He says, yeah, Blake was a fool to let her go...but nevertheless he did, and it's totes OK 'cause she now has him (Dex) to add a little man spice to her life. Alexis says he may be right 'bout that, then tucks her arm in his and steers him over to the other end of the living room. As an emasculated Mark looks on helplessly, Alexis urges Dex to call the airline and cancel her reservation...and he obediently does and quickly learns that it had already been cancelled. Alexis smugly tells him she decided all on her own to cancel the trip, but that she's still into the idea of destroying Blake; however, it'll be in his board room, not his hotel room. Dex seems pleased with that pronouncement...thought I have no idea why, since she's clearly unwilling or unable to let go of her bitterness/anger/hurt/whatever she so deeply feels for her wrinkly old goat of an ex-husband. She sternly reminds Dex that she, and not he, makes her own decisions and runs her own life.
Tracy is rifling through confidential files in Denver-Carrington's appropriately named Confidential Files Room. Andy happens to walk in and is all, "Wha-a?" when he sees what's happening, and Tracy tries to act all nonchalant as she breezily chirps, "I'll be out of your way in a minute." Andy tightly says he didn't realize that the PR department kept its files in this room, and Tracy says they don't, then spouts some nonsense about how Krystle is always saying that PR deals with private matters and so one must always be prepared. She smugly says, "That's why Krystle gave me the keys" then flounces out, leaving Andy staring after her suspiciously.
Tracy asks Marsha (Blake's secretary) if Blake called and left any messages for her, and Marsha just stares back at her blankly, 'cause why in the hell would the CEO of a large oil company be calling a PR flunky while he's on his honeymoon? Marsha reminds her that she has a 2:00pm appointment with a reporter from The Chronicle, and Tracy declares that she'll be conducting the interview in Mrs. Carrington's office. Marsha looks appalled and says she didn't realize she'd be using her superior's office, and Tracy bitchily snarks, "I'm telling you now" and flounces off. I'm not sure it's a wise strategy for a corporate wannabe to piss off the CEO's secretary, but whatevs.
Back in Rio, Krystle is decked out in a fancy red dress, while Blake is in an all white suit. He pours them a drink and toasts to a lifetime of happiness...and after they each take a sip, they stare at each other intensely. He asks her what she was thinking about earlier, remarking, "I know that pensive Krystle look" - bwahahaha! - and Krystle explains that she's physically unable to contort her face into an expression other than one of pensiveness 'cause she's been thinking a lot lately about how much she wants to give him a child. Blake frowns and says he has no desire to repeat the I'm-soooo-depressed-about-my-miscarriage storyline from Season 2 'cause she was such a major bummer to be around. He reminds her that they have Baby Blake to cuddle and enjoy and will soon have Kirby's spawn to dote on. Krystle pensively contemplates this, and the two start slow dancing.
Jeff and Kirby are having an awkward dinner in the mansion's dining room. When Jeff remarks that she's not eating very much, she snaps, "I'm not hungry!" He asks her whassup with the bitchitude, so she tells him he didn't call Andy as he had promised - but Jeff informs her he did, actually, and that Andy isn't available to meet with them until tomorrow. Kirby says she's irked that they have to keep pretending to be a normal couple, then throws down her fork and storms upstairs. Adam spots her fleeing to her room and, a few seconds later, barges in as she's standing by the window heaving. Kirby wearily tells him to get lost, but he insists she needs him...and she bitchily retorts that she doesn't need anyone, least of all her date rapist baby daddy. Adam stubbornly declares, "You need my love", reminds her that he proposed to her yesterday, then for some reason starts talking about himself in the third person: "Adam loves you as he's never loved anyone before." LOL. Kirby retorts, "Kirby doesn't want your love!" and says she's fine with having only her baby to love her...but Adam warns her that her baby will grow up hating her for depriving it of its birthright, not that that's going to happen anyway 'cause he refuses to allow her to take his rape spawn - a Carrington by blood - away from him.
Two weeks later..
Claudia is chatting with Danny's nanny in the park when a strange man comes over, acts overly familiar, and refers to Danny by name. The concerned nanny tells Claudia that he comes over to them everyday, but Claudia just shrugs unconcernedly and says he's probably just a friendly type of guy, then says she needs to dash off to work now.
Alexis barks a to-do list at Steven for his upcoming business trip, then poutishly invokes his birthday plans with Claudia, Blake, and Krystle. Steven's like, "Uh, d'yuh" then suggests she have dinner with him and Claudia shortly after his birthday, and she seems happy enough with that idea. He asks her whassup with the Lex-Dex company, specifically the tar sands project, then grumbles about how he's received no real information about it from Dex. Alexis breezily says she'll handle Dex, and that he should run along to the airport now. A few seconds later, Dex drops by unannounced and Alexis chides him for his presumptuousness in not calling ahead. Dex says he doesn't have time to play games, then in the next breath tells her he was playing games when he fibbed to her about being in Australia on business for the last two weeks. He says no matter where his tortured mind took him, it always came down to one woman: her. Alexis feigns indifference and says, "Sorry, not interested" - but Dex insists she wants him as much as he wants her. He then whips out a large velvet box and says he managed to put a little something together that so perfectly reflects her beauty...and inside the box is a dazzling diamond and emerald necklace. Alexis gasps and says, "It's breathtaking" and Dex tells her all about how he picked out each stone, polished them lovingly, then carefully cobbled them together to create this glittery tribute to her stunning awesomeness. He sure likes to spout some serious, waist-deep feces-wading bullcack, that Dex. He puts the necklace around her neck, and Alexis sashays over to the mirror and admires her new jewels. Dex looms behind her and declares, "Magnificent!" while an impressed Alexis smirks happily at her reflection...and then the two start smooching intensely.
Fallon is in a meeting with Peter's Brazilian architect, Ernesto, discussing the proposed expansion of the La Mirage. She calls his work brilliant, sips coffee, and toasts Peter for bringing them together. Adam enters her office just as Ernesto is on his way out...and after he glances at the blueprints, he warns Fallon that this building project will likely be a lot more expensive than she's being told, and that, generally speaking, Peter is a con man who's full of hot air and empty promises. Fallon snappishly tells him to let her worry about Peter, then tells him to get lost 'cause she's got lots of work to do.
Andy has drawn up divorce papers and is going over them with Kirby. He urges her to think it over carefully before signing - but she ignores that advice and impatiently grabs the pen, pauses for a moment to tough out a sudden near fainting spell, and defiantly signs the papers. After Andy leaves, she rubs her temples and stares worriedly into space.
Andy heads over to Denver-Carrington to deliver the divorce papers to Jeff...and Jeff tells him how displeased he is about failing at marriage #2. Andy asks him if the split has anything to do with his lingering feelings for Fallon, and Jeff assures him it has nothing to do with that, and that Fallon has her own thing going with her weird new Eurotrash boyfriend. Andy reminds him that if she marries Mr. Eurotrash, he'll become Baby Blake's step-daddy, and Jeff stares mutely into space as he contemplates that disturbing notion.
Ernesto drops in on Peter's head manservant/lackey and snarks about how Peter owes him $2 million. The lackey reminds him that Peter did just pay him $1 million, which he earned on the sale of his horse to Blake Carrington. Ernesto says he needs all of his money back and complains about how Peter squanders so much of his dough on nose candy. The lackey assures him that Peter always [eventually] pays his debts, then smiles all sinister-like and says he's about to strike oil.
Blake and Krystle return to Denver and are greeted on the private airstrip by Fallon and Peter. The newlyweds gush to Peter about how magnificent his Rio hotel was and thank him for all the hospitality they enjoyed. Fallon informs them that Peter is about to give her another flying lesson, and doesn't seem nearly as concerned as Blake clearly is that he's not a licensed instructor. Once inside the tiny plane, Peter stares creepily at Fallon and gives her an intense smooch before taking off.
Claudia is hard at work at La Mirage when the nanny calls her in a panic to report that the overly familiar man followed them home from the park and is now standing outside the apartment building. Claudia orders her to double lock the door and sit tight until she gets there.
Claudia peers out the window and tells the nanny she doesn't see anyone - but the nanny insists that the weirdo was standing right across the street, staring up at them. Claudia mulls that over and decides it's probably not weird enough behavior to call the police over - but when the nanny goes into the nursery to check on Danny, Claudia tries to call Steven wherever he travelled to on business, but is told he can't be reached.
Andy tattles to Blake about how Tracy was rifling through the confidential files in the Confidential Files Room - but Blake doesn't look at all concerned and tells him that Krystle entrusted her with the keys. Andy reminds him that these files are super secret and that an underling shouldn't have access to that kind of information, but Blake argues that this underling is a very capable woman. A few seconds later the phone rings - and it's Claudia, who suddenly decided that she should panic over the stalker weirdo. Blake furrows his brows concernedly and is all, "Wha-at's the matter?!"
In the next scene, Claudia is getting Danny and the nanny settled into Carrington manor. Blake assures her she's doing the right thing and that they all belong at the mansion anyway 'cause it's their home. Claudia says she's skeptical that Steven will agree to live here permanently, but Blake points out that it makes the most sense for the sake of his baby's safety. After Claudia heads back to the La Mirage, Krystle comes downstairs and tells Blake that Danny and his nanny have settled in nicely. Blake says he has a meeting to get to, but urges her to take the day off so she can spend time cooing at and cuddling little Danny, and Krystle smiles serenely and says she definitely likes the sound of that.
Alexis is furious when she hears about Danny's new living arrangements and bitchily demands an explanation. Claudia says the decision wasn't an attack on her; she did it purely for the baby's safety. Alexis wails that the mansion is a prison and that she won't be able to ever visit the tot, and Claudia promises she'll bring her grandson to her penthouse any time she wants to see him [provided she immediately stop screaming at her for making her own life decisions]. Alexis snarls that Steven, not she, is the biological parent in this equation and as such he should have been the one to make this decision. Claudia angrily replies that Steven considers her to be Danny's mother in every way that matters, and that she doesn't need her permission to determine what is safest for him. Alexis scoffs at the idea that Danny is safe with Blake and shakes her head dramatically from side to side - LOL - and calls him a destroyer. Claudia accuses her of being willing to jeopardize Danny's safety 'cause of her hatred for Blake, says she feels sorry for her, then tells her to go pee up a rope 'cause she's got work to do.
Jeannette (the maid) tells Krystle she's very worried about Kirby 'cause the circulation in her swollen ring finger is slowly being cut off. She says that Kirby is in a lot of pain, but no one on the housekeeping staff has a clue what to do. Krystle does some quick thinking and tells her to call Tony at the stable and ask him to bring a metal cutter.
Tony saws off the ring while Kirby whimpers in pain and Krystle comforts her. When he finally cuts the wedding band off, Kirby breathes a deep sigh of relief. Krystle tells her she'll take the damaged ring to the jewellers' and get it all fixed up before Jeff comes home - but before Kirby tells her that that won't be necessary, she stares down at her sausage fingers (via footage from another person's man hands) and remarks on how swollen they are. She cries, "Look at them! Ooooh noooo!" and Krystle quickly offers to call the doctor.
I'm a recapper not an obstetrician, but isn't finger swelling kind of a normal thing during pregnancy?