Recap: Audrina has brought Justin along to check out a prospective apartment in what looks like a very urban neighbourhood in L.A. She remarks on the deficiencies of her current living situation and says that since she's been relegated to the guest house (um, a decision of her own making), she might as well just get her own place.
Spencer summons Stephanie over to his apartment to report that Heidi never came home last night and if she happens to know whaddup with that...so Stephanie informs him that Heidi is in Las Vegas doing pretend Bolthouse work and might possibly pretend that she's going to permanently relocate there. Spencer looks aghast at that news and declares that he's jumping into his car and driving to Las Vegas...and that, for whatever reason, she's going to need to tag along on his romantic adventure.
Sam Nazarian and Brent are giving Heidi a tour of their newest acquisition, the Sahara Hotel & Casino, and she's busily jotting down notes detailing their various plans to renovate the property. After that, they head upstairs to one of the suites to get a gander at the incredible view of the city and beyond, and Heidi expresses great excitement at being part of Bolthouse's exclusive A-team.
Over at People's Revolution, Whitney asks Lauren how Audrina is doingk, and Lauren sadly says they haven't really talked much lately, and that she's starting to seriously wonder if Audrina even wants to be quasi-roommates with her and Lo anymore. She says that when they lived together at Hillside Villas, the only thing they really had in common was being roommates...and if you take the roommate component out of their friendship, there really ain't a helluva lot left.
After arriving in Las Vegas, Spencer orders Stephanie to call Heidi and ask her where she is at this very moment, so Stephanie dutifully rings her up and learns that she's having a pretend work meeting with Brent, Sam, and some other flunky at the Palazzo Hotel. Spencer's all, "On it!" and drives straight to the hotel, parks in front of the main entrance, and races into the lobby. Stephanie sheepishly shrugs at the parking attendant and asks if it's OK for her and the car to wait here until her idiot brother returns from his quest to win back the heart of his beloved.
Spencer interrupts Heidi's meeting with The Bolthouse Boys to ask her if they can have a privately filmed Hills moment outside. Once she's out of earshot, Brent puts his limited acting chops to work wondering aloud what the hell that was, while Sam quips, "I guess you have to find a new project manager!" before laughing heartily. [LOL. That he does, Sam. That he does.] Heidi admonishes Spencer for barging in on her very important over drinks work meeting, and he retorts that he can't bear for her to relocate to Las Vegas - but, more importantly, doesn't want them to be broken up anymore. Heidi tells him she can't do this right now, and he's like, "Pleeeeeeeeease come back to L.A. with me." Heidi scrunches her face into an expression of wistful rumination before returning to the table and apologizing to The Bolthouse Boys for the interruption. Brent tells her that she needs to get this situation under control asap and make some life decisions, then warns that she only gets one shot with Sam [despite Sam's obvious amusement at getting tangled up into this contrived reality show spectacle].
Lauren and Lo are in their kitchen, cooking fish and wondering if Audrina is going to actually join them for dinner. They get their answer when Audrina exits the guest house and quietly ambles past the main house on her way out for the evening. A miffed looking Lauren murmurs, "That's weird", while Lo chucklingly says, "I guess it's just you and me."
The next morning at the Palazzo Hotel, Brent is standing outside the main entrance and anxiously checking his watch, presumably waiting for Heidi to appear. When she fails to materialize, Sam arrives and tells Brent he's ready to head to the airport now...and that since clearly Heidi isn't interested in her pretend promotion, he's A-OK with leaving her behind. A few seconds later, the camera pans over to the hotel lobby, where Heidi, Spencer, and Stephanie are solemnly riding the down escalator.
Back at Casa Unease, Lauren tells Lo that she feels the need to hash things out with Audrina 'cause of all the tension that's been brewing lately. Lo says she's fairly indifferent about her working out anything with Audrina and chuckles over the ridiculousness of the situation... and Lauren reminds her that the two of them have a twelve year lead on her flimsy, reality show friendship with Audrina.
Lauren drops by the guest house for a tête-à-tête with Audrina. She complains that they never really see each other anymore, and Audrina points out that it was soooo different at Hillside Villas 'cause their bedrooms were right next to each other...whereas now she feels awkward even going into the main house, much less going up to the second floor where the bedrooms are. Lauren insists that she and Lo want her to hang with them, but Audrina just kind of shrugs and says she's been doing her own thing lately, mostly 'cause she feels ignored and 'dissed by Lo, who she strongly feels is pulling them apart. Lauren tears up at that and insists that neither Lo nor anyone else influences who she's friends with - but, by this time, Audrina has shut down...and the two just stare at each other in sad muteness for several seconds. After that, a deflated looking Lauren departs the guest house, leaving the strained situation unresolved.
Heidi and Spencer arrive at their L.A. apartment and walk inside hand-in-hand, looking happy and newly re-coupled.
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Recap: Heidi requests a meeting with Brent to tell him she's super eager to play a larger role in Bolthouse's acquisitions and is totes open to travelling or relocating as needed. Brent pretends to be delighted by her sudden ambition, appoints her the company's newest Project Manager, and invites her to accompany himself and Sam Nazarian to Las Vegas to check out a hotel/casino they just bought and are planning on renovating. Heidi perks up at that and tells him she's definitely up to the challenge. LOL.
Lauren and Lo are sunning themselves by the pool when Audrina ambles over to inform them that she's off to Pulse Studios, where she and Chiara are overseeing a recording session with the band Alkaline Trio. She invites them to stop by later and check it out...and Lauren asks her to text her the address, while Lo rolls her eyes disinterestedly and later tells Lauren she'd much rather go shopping.
Over at Bolthouse, Heidi tells Kimberly that Brent has elevated her status to Project Manager, and that in a couple of days she's going to be jetting to Vegas to check out a new hotel/casino everyone's going to pretend with a straight face that she's going to play an important role in renovating. Kimberly shares in her excitement before asking what Spencer is going to say 'bout all this, and Heidi tells her she really couldn't give a rat's ass.
Alkaline Trio is killin' it during their recording session at Pulse Studios when Audrina gets a call from Lauren, announcing that she and Lo have arrived. Audrina tells them to come right into the control room...and Lauren does her best to look interested in watching the band perform, while Lo can't bring herself to fake anything and fiddles with her phone before complaining that she's hungry. Lauren looks conflicted for a few seconds before telling Audrina that she and Lo are off to get some sushi. She invites Audrina to come along, but Audrina is forced to decline 'cause she and Chiara are expected to stay until the band is finished recording. After Lauren and Lo leave, Chiara contorts her face into a 'the fuck?' expression and remarks on how weird it is that the two only stayed "for five seconds".
At Luckyfish, Lauren and Lo select their desired sushi and talk about the way they just rudely skipped out on the recording session Audrina invited them to. Lauren says that clearly Audrina expected them to stay the whole time - or at least longer than five seconds - but Lo just shrugs and fake self-deprecatingly says she doesn't feel as though she's cool enough to hang out with with a band.
Stephanie drops by Heidi's apartment to grumble about how desperately she wants Spencer to move out 'cause of what a mess he's making of her living room. Heidi's like, "Yeah, whatever" and breaks the news that she just got a faux new job opportunity with lots of travel, and that she might possibly relocate to Las Vegas. She says, "There's nothing really holding me back" now that she and Spencer are pretending as though either has any intention of moving on from their relationship. Stephanie argues that Spencer has zero interest in dating anyone else and wanks her about how perfect they are for each other...and Heidi digests that for a few seconds before asking Stephanie to please not tell Spencer about any of this - which, of course, Stephanie correctly translates to mean 'you need to tell Spencer about my travel/relocation plans at your earliest opportunity'.
Lauren and Lo are playing with their adorable new puppy (!) when Audrina enters the house and is all, "Who is this cutie?!" They introduce her to baby Chloe...and Lo jokes about how Chloe is going to brag to the other pooches in doggie daycare about having two mommies. Audrina looks wounded by being excluded from the new puppy's mommy circle and reacts by getting up and leaving...and Lauren scrunches her face into an expression of sad regret at her roommate's abrupt departure.
Stephanie rails at Spencer for messing up her kitchen and says she's officially fed up with him squatting in her apartment and controlling her personal life. She orders him to get the hell out of her place today, and he tells he'd be more than happy to move out, not least 'cause he's tired of listening to her bitch and moan about his aimless/jobless existence.
Audrina brings Justin into the kitchen of the main house she shares with Lauren and Lo to get something to eat. She tells him she doesn't typically spend a lot of time in the main house 'cause there's a weird vibe to the place now that Lo is part of the roommate dynamic. Justin clucks sympathetically and says it's not very desirable to live with that kind of tension, and Audrina agrees that she's sick of Lo's eye-rolling and phone fiddling whenever she tries to engage with her. Justin suggests she consider looking at other places to rent, and Audrina mulls that over for a few seconds and agrees that maybe a change in living arrangements is in order.
At the Van Nuys airport, Heidi, Brent, and Sam Nazarian board a Las Vegas bound private plane. Sam asks Heidi why she's suddenly available to do all this travelling...and when she just sort of mumbles a non-answer, Brent interjects and says that until recently, Heidi was tied down with a toxic assbag of a boyfriend. Heidi adds that the assbag is now out of the picture, which prompts Sam to wonder aloud what his reaction is going to be when he learns that she's jetting off to Vegas. When he asks how old Spencer is and learns that he's only twenty-four, he laughs heartily and then cackles, "Yep, he's going to lose his mind."
Spencer arrives at Heidi's now vacant apartment and wanders dejectedly from room to room before pulling out his phone and calling Stephanie, ordering her to call him back pronto. As he stares sadly into space, the camera pans over to Heidi, who's staring out of the plane window in equally morose contemplation.
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Recap: Lauren, Lo, and Audrina get their first look at the house they're going to be renting and squeal happily over the huge amount of space it has. Audrina lays claim to the guest house across the yard and says she looooves that it's so private...and the three agree that they're going to need to throw a housewarming party asap.
Later, while dining in an outdoor cafe, Lauren tells Lo that she invited Stephen Colletti to their housewarming party - but makes it clear that she and Stephen are strictly platonic friends now, despite the fact that she never really stopped liking him since their high school years.
Stephanie finds Spencer taking a break from lounging on the couch in her apartment to lounging on a couch in the Karma Coffeehouse. She informs him that Lauren invited her to her upcoming housewarming party, and Spencer's all, "You're being disloyal to the Pratt clan", then gruffly orders her to get lost...and when she refuses to leave, he responds by getting up and shuffling out of the coffeehouse.
Over at the new house, Lauren, Lo, and Audrina are discussing the guest list for their housewarming party. Audrina lists the various people she plans to invite, including - ack! - Justin...and at the mention of Justin, Lauren's like, "Wait a minute, rewind!" and makes Audrina confirm that the slovenly shitbag she dumped just ten episodes ago for his boorishness is, in fact, being invited into their home. Audrina reacts by squinting stink-eyes while an oblivious Lauren announces that she has invited Stephen Colletti to attend the party...and Lo squeals her approval and gushes about how they've always had a thing, even though Lauren insists again that their relationship is strictly platonic.
Party time! The housewarming party guests begin to arrive, including Brody...who introduces Lauren to his bosom-y new girlfriend, Cora.
Stephanie stops in at Heidi's apartment to needlessly inform her that she's on her way to Lauren's housewarming party. Heidi's all 'the fuck?' and makes it clear that she's absolutely not OK with her and her ex-BFF hanging out together. Stephanie points out how dumb it is that she's expected to run her social plans past her and Spencer for approval...and how much dumber than that it is that she actually does run her social plans past her and Spencer for approval, only to feel guilty when they constantly cast shade on her friendship with Lauren. Heidi sanctimoniously says that she must feel guilty 'cause she knows she's doing something wrong...then, like Spencer, questions her loyalty to the family. Stephanie grumbles that this tedious feud all seems "so middle school", then - in a visibly disheartened fashion - reluctantly agrees to skip the housewarming party and offers to mopishly spend the evening with her, watching a movie or doing something equally as boring.
Lo is gushy and thrilled when Stephen Colletti arrives at the party - at the same time a grubby looking Justin arrives and is warmly greeted by Brody and Frankie. Lauren then engages in a one-on-one with Stephen and somehow gets on the topic of her stewing estrangement with Audrina and how she doesn't feel welcome to wander over to her private guest house, even just to say hey.
Audrina, meanwhile, is hanging with Justin in her private guest house, grumbling about how annoyed she was when Lauren and Lo made a big stupid deal about her inviting him to the party. She mumbles that she just wants to do what she wants, preferably without their bitchy commentary.
Stephen tells Lauren that they should catch up at dinner tomorrow night, aka not when there's this level of madness around them [the MTV camera crew notwithstanding, I guess].
The next day at FIDM, Lauren tells Stephanie that the housewarming party was a success, and that it's a shame she's a grown woman who doesn't have the stones to tell Heidi and/or Spencer to go pee up a rope regarding with whom she chooses to socialize. Stephanie complains about how much she haaaates it when Heidi and/or Spencer accuse her of being disloyal to the family, and Lauren says she kinda/sorta feels bad for putting her in this position, then changes the subject to Stephen Colletti and their upcoming dinner date.
Lauren is primping for her dinner with Stephen while telling Lo she's not 100% sure if this is a full on date or not, despite the many proclamations this episode about their platonic status. A few seconds later, Stephen arrives...and after the two hug hello and tell Lo not to wait up, they head out to Il Cielo. As the two catch up while eating dinner, Lauren gets on the topic of Audrina again and gabbles about how she's not quite sure what's going on with Audrina and Justin...and that she and Audrina aren't the kind of roommates who bare their souls to each other. Stephen's like, "Wow, bummer" and changes the subject to how thrilled his mom was to hear about their dinner date, even though he emphasized to her that they're just platonic friends. Lauren chuckles and tells him that her parents love him a lot too...but agrees that, yep, there's nothing but strict platonicness going on here. After dinner and while en route home, Lauren reminisces to Stephen about how he always managed to get her home before her curfew...and he recalls that he drove fast enough to get her home on time - but not in a reckless fashion 'cause, "I had precious cargo." Lauren looks touched by that remark...and when he pulls up to her house, the two bid each other goodnight with a chaste hug.
Lo is up late, working on her laptop when Lauren returns home...and when she asks how the date went, Lauren says it was fine - but wistfully adds that some things are better left the way they are. Lo insists that she and Stephen are so darn cute together [though I'm sorta meh 'bout that] - but Lauren says she always feels like she's back in high school whenever the two of them hang out, and reminds Lo that she's not in high school anymore. Lo's like, "Whatever" and dreamily says she'd looooove it if she and Stephen somehow re-connected and got married one day.
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Recap: While packing up designer clothing items to be returned to the People's Revolution's New York office, Whitney asks Lauren whassup with Audrina lately. Lauren's like, "Dunno" 'cause she hasn't really talked to her in awhile, but is grimly aware that she and Heidi have been hanging out lately. She admits that it's kinda awkward 'cause she can't dictate to Audrina who she can and can't invite to her apartment - but at the same time doesn't like the idea of Heidi being in what is also her apartment. Whitney clucks sympathetically, then swiftly changes the subject to how thrilled she is that ever since People's Revolution became The Hills' new Teen Vogue, they get to work/chat/gossip together again.
Later at Hillside Villas, Lauren, Lo, and Audrina are discussing their plans to party at Goa. Lauren mentions that Stephanie might be there, and Lo cheekily wonders aloud if she's going to bring Heidi...and the three silently contemplate that not coincidental awkwardness.
Stephanie is at Heidi's apartment, helping Heidi select an outfit for a night at Goa. Heidi says she's looking forward to a fun girls' night out, then wonders if Lauren is going to be there...and says if she is, maybe this'll be the first time that Lauren doesn't treat her with open disdain. She adds that the bad blood between them is soooo early Season 3 and describes the whole situation as "old water under the bridge".
Lauren and her posse are partying at Goa when Stephanie and Heidi arrive. In an added twist, Stephanie glances across the room and notices that Justin - ack! - is also in the club and points him out to Heidi, and Heidi says she's just itchin' to break this news to Audrina - but is wary to approach her table on account of she's sitting next to Lauren. A few seconds later, Lauren and Lo leave the table to get drinks, so Heidi uses that as an opening to seat herself beside Audrina to inform her of the Justin sighting. Lauren, meanwhile, notices what's happening and is all 'the fuck is Heidi doing sitting at our table?' and sits beside Stephanie and asks her why in blazes she thought it was a good idea to bring Heidi along to their night out. When Stephanie mumbles a non-explanation, Heidi debates leaving - but then decides to stay when Justin shuffles over to say hey and seat himself between her and Audrina. Heidi greets Justin as if they're old friends and gabbles to him about how silly it is for her and Audrina to not be friends 'cause of a beef Lauren can't seem to let go of, and Lauren overhears her and snarls, "OMFG, I need to leave this table immediately." She gets up and heads toward the exit, telling Lo that she wants to go home now 'cause she simply can't bring herself to pretend it's normal to be sitting at a table with Heidi.
The next day, Heidi grumbles to Stephanie that their girls' night out wasn't quite what she expected, and is bummed that Lauren is still clearly not OK with even being in the same club as her.
At Hillside Villas, Lauren tells Lo it's very inconvenient that the two of them live so far away from each other...and adds that her lease for this apartment is up soon and that it'd be sooooo fun if they all got a house together. Lo asks her if by they all she's including Audrina, and Lauren says she is - but admits that she's less than jazzed about the possibility that she might bring such undesirables as Heidi and/or Justin by the house. Lo concurs as she chucklingly replies, "That's not allowed."
Audrina meets up with Justin at a restaurant called Republic, and he gushes over her cute leather ensemble and asks her if she misses riding on his motorcycle. She admits that she does, and is visibly pleased when he wanks her about how he hasn't had anyone on it since her. He updates her about his new place on the beach, and that he wants to do his damnedest to behave better now that he has his priorities straight...and Audrina tells him she's hanging out with Heidi again, but hates all of the subsequent drama surrounding their renewed friendship. Justin says it's always nice to re-connect with people, then asks her what she's doing later...and when she shrugs and is all, "Dunno", he grins and murmurs, "Uh oh." Ugh. My sentiments exactly.
The next morning, Audrina tells Lauren she went out with Justin last night, and that he got hisself all cleaned up and didn't belch once. As Lauren digests that troubling development, Audrina adds insult to injury when she says she's also on solid footing with Heidi again, and that it feels great to have an old friend back in her life.
Heidi drops by Casa Stephanie, where she encounters Spencer doing his usual couch lounging. She tells him about her less than satisfying evening at Goa 'cause of how uncomfortable Lauren still is being around her, and Spencer says he has zero desire to talk about Lauren and/or anything that happens while she's out clubbing. He suggests she shut it and quietly wait for Stephanie to return home - but Heidi decides she'd rather leave...and as she's sashaying toward the door, Spencer remarks on how great she's looking.
While dining out at The Spanish Kitchen, Lauren and Lo begin discussing their plans to move in together - just as Audrina arrives. They fill her in on their change-o-housing plans...and when Audrina says she's fairly lukewarm about the idea, Lo tells her that the social dynamic between the three of them will be different than when it was just her and Lauren, but just as fun [though, as it turns out, not so much].
Recap: Heidi drops by Epic Records to lunch with Audrina in the lovely outdoor garden cafeteria. Heidi tells her it's sooooo nice to be able to hang out and talk, then adds, "I'm really, like, gaining myself again." She tells Audrina she wants to have a girls' night out - with no Spencer, obviously - and asks her if she'd like to come...and Audrina responds to the invitation by staring back at her mutely.
Lauren arrives at a very busy People's Revolution, which is bustling with prospective runway models. She's immediately put to work by Kelly, who orders her to help with casting by taking Polaroids of the models and matching the photos with their names.
Stephanie tells Spencer she's off to party at S Bar...and when she doesn't confirm whether or not Heidi is going with her, Spencer says he'll take that as a yes. After Stephanie leaves the apartment, he stares contemplatively into space.
Stephanie and Heidi arrive at S Bar and quickly locate Audrina and Chiara. Stephanie regales the gals with tales of Spencer squatting in her apartment, and they - Heidi included - seem greatly amused by his inability/unwillingness to lazily lounge on the couch all day inside his own living accommodations.
Over at People's Revolution, Lauren tells Whitney she's happy for her for having this dream job and wistfully says it'd be soooooo cool to work here...and Whitney points out that if she impresses Kelly with her efficiency, maybe she'll hire her. A few seconds later, Kelly ambles over and tells Lauren she'd like her to help out with the various shows tomorrow, then orders her to get a good night's sleep and show up tomorrow wearing an all black, non-boob-baring ensemble.
Over at S Bar, Heidi et. al. gabble about how super awesome it is to be single - just as Spencer and his friend Kevin arrive at the club. When Spencer starts chatting with a group of nubile young ladies, Heidi complains about how aggressive girls can be, and declares [as if it'd be worth the effort], "I will kill some b**** if she comes up to him." Heidi grows agitated when Spencer is witnessed doing shots with the ladies...and when he ambles over to where she's standing, she confronts him about his behavior. The two bicker about whether or not he's sassing her by publicly flirting with other women, blah blah...and Heidi tells him she's sooooo angry at him for making a fool of her during what was supposed to be a fun girls' night out.
The next morning, Audrina tells Lauren about Spencer's boorish antics at S Bar, and Lauren remarks on how weird it is that Heidi isn't even able to have a civil interaction with the guy she is (was?) engaged to. Audrina says it's surprising that a Chucky doll lookalike could find so many young ladies with whom to hold court at S Bar, and Lauren contorts her face into an expression of disgust and says he prolly paid them, then snarls, "No girl would willingly touch that scum." She then chuckles at the vehemence that just spilled out of her mouth and is all, "Oops! where did that come from?!", then says she doesn't have time to focus any more of her energy on a shitbag like Spencer, 'cause she has a busy day of model herding to get to.
Lauren and Whitney arrive at Smashbox Studios to help Kelly with the rehearsal runway show and lock down the specific colors of the fancy lighting.
Over at Bolthouse, Heidi and Kimberly pretend to sort out something work-related before Kimberly asks her whassup with her glum aura. Heidi says she had a rough night, then tells her about how Spencer showed up at her girls' night out and drank shots with a coterie of fawning ladies. As Kimberly's all, "Wha-a-a-a?", Heidi wonders if he's over their coupling, but Kimberly points out that if he were over it, he wouldn't have created such a spectacle at S Bar. Heidi admits that she haaaated seeing her [ex?]fiancé in the company of other women, then rhetorically asks, "How can you love and hate someone so much at the same time?"
Later, Spencer calls Heidi to rehash the drama of the prior evening, and she suggests he swing by Bolthouse so that they can have one of their in-car tête-à-têtes.
Lauren and Whitney are backstage at one of the fashion shows People's Revolution is producing...and after the models are successfully herded, lined up, and sent out to the runway, Kelly applauds their organizational skills. Lauren gushes to Whitney about how much she loooooved working backstage at the event and gives her a thank you hug.
Heidi climbs into Spencer's car and irritably tells him that if he wants to be single again, he needs to let her know. A bewildered Spencer's all, "Wha-a-a?" and points out that she's the one who made him single when she insisted on this "relationship vacation" ... and Heidi argues that she simply wanted some space, which she didn't assume would translate to him hooking up with other women. Spencer counter-argues that talking to women in bars doesn't constitute hooking up, and adds that he doesn't think it's fair of her to expect him to hang in limbo until she gets around to deciding when their relationship vacation is officially over.
Kelly gushes over the wonderful job Whitney and Lauren did backstage and tells Lauren she's so impressed with her that she's offering her a job at People's Revolution...and Whitney beams in great delight at this predictable development.
As the episode comes to a close...
Heidi exits Spencer's car.
Whitney and Lauren gabble happily as they head home after the fashion show.
Spencer drives off as a sad looking Heidi ambles back to Bolthouse.
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Recap: While eating out at a cafe, Lauren tells Whitney that Spencer admonished Stephanie for attending her birthday party at S Bar last episode, and that his dickishness about it was so harsh that it made Stephanie burst into tears. Whitney points out that since Stephanie (presumably) had zero to do with sex tape-gate, she has no reason not to be nice to her...then promptly changes the subject to her recent New York trip to help out with the Sass & Bide fitting during the run-up to Fashion Week. She describes her assigned tasks of putting the models in proper order and announcing them as they hit the runway, and Lauren coos excitedly and says she'd looooove to be able to do fun stuff like that.
Over at People's Revolution, Kelly calls an impromptu staff meeting, and begins by barking at her staff to..
Kelly then asks Jessica (the L.A. publicist) what she's done regarding celebrity outreach and/or if she has any press scheduled for their clients with preview opportunities...and Jessica stares back at her blankly and is like, "Uh, no, no, and no..?", then weakly says she's been half-heartedly working on something or other. Whitney makes a helpful suggestion about reaching out to celebrities who have performed with someone I'm guessing is one of clients (?) ... and Kelly applauds her 'out of the box' problem solving abilities while simultaneously shooting Jessica the stink-eye.
Lauren is sitting by herself in the Teen Vogue closet office when she decides to call Whitney to say hey. Whitney tells her she's sooooo busy gearing up for L.A. Fashion Week, glumly wishes they still worked together, then hastily gets off the phone when a styling emergency arises.
At Casa Stephanie, Heidi and Stephanie vow to indulge in a 'girls' night out' at least once a week. Heidi reminisces about how she used to go clubbing every night, and can't wait to get back into the nightlife scene. Later, the two arrive at a club called Vice...and after a few minutes, Heidi notices that Audrina, Chiara, and a couple of guys are sitting at a table across the room. Heidi reminds Stephanie that she was friends with Audrina before Lauren was friends with her, then figures that that entitles her to wander over and say hey. Heidi asks Audrina if she can sit down for a minute, then laments how hard this ongoing feud with Lauren has been on her...and, now that she's having problems with Spencer, she realizes how desperately she needs her gal pals back in her life. Audrina diplomatically calls it "a learning process" to figure out that you're supposed to keep your friendships intact while dating someone, and Heidi earnestly tells her that if she ever wants to hang out or go clubbing during a 'girls' night out', she should give her a call. After the two hug goodbye, Audrina tells Chiara it's somewhat encouraging that Heidi is making an effort to reconnect with her - but that she can't help but feel wary about the shit-storm this renewed friendship is likely to bring about.
Heidi and Stephanie are shopping for decor items at a store called Room Service...and Heidi is gleeful about being able to pick out stuff for an apartment that no longer has unsightly graffiti art sprayed across her living room wall. She mentions that she left behind a few items at Lauren's apartment and would love to pick them up, preferably when Audrina is home alone. She adds that there's no reason for the two of them to not be friends - but Stephanie points out that since Audrina is under "Lauren's wing", she's likely going to do everything possible to not piss her off.
Lauren, Lo, and Whitney are working out together at the gym...and Whitney describes her new job at People's Revolution as waaaay more intense than anything she ever did at Teen Vogue. Lauren recalls meeting a very crotchety Kelly Cutrone during the Season 1 finale, and Whitney chucklingly says she recalls the panicked phone call she got from her afterwards...then dishes about how Kelly directed her ire at Jessica, the L.A. publicist, during a recent staff meeting, and that it was a scary sight to behold. She then suggests that Lauren drop by during her lunch break sometime so that she can see her new workplace.
At FIDM, Stephanie reports to Lauren that she and Heidi went to Vice last night, ran into Audrina, and that the two are cool after a heart-to-heart. Lauren reacts to that development by staring back at her with an expression of irked contemplation.
When Audrina returns home to Hillside Villas, Lauren comes right out and asks her if she talked to Heidi at Vice last night...and when Audrina confirms that she did, Lauren cautions her to be careful about resuming that friendship 'cause she wouldn't put it past her ex-bestie to want to hang with her (Audrina) just to piss her (Lauren) off. Audrina promises to be careful, but insists that she's only mildly tempted to go behind her back and consort with someone who was even tangentially associated with something as sleazy and friendship-ending as sex tape-gate.
Lauren arrives at People's Revolution to lunch with Whitney - but Whitney says she doesn't have time for lunch after all, then asks her if she'd like to help catalogue a rack of clothing. As they're doing that, Emily (a co-owner of People's Revolution) wanders over and tells Lauren that they're always looking for extra help during Fashion Week, and Lauren says she's definitely intrigued by the prospect.
Heidi drops by Hillside Villas to visit with Audrina as she picks up the odds and ends she left at the apartment in Season 1. She says it's very awkward being here, and both agree that it's "crazy and random" that Lauren and Stephanie have become fast friends. A few minutes later, Heidi says she should prolly high-tail it outa here before Lauren comes home, then tells Audrina again that if she's ever interested in hanging out, she need only give her a call.
When Lauren returns home, Audrina dutifully reports that Heidi stopped by earlier to pick up the last of her stuff. Lauren's all 'the fuck?' and makes it clear how much she haaaaates the idea that Heidi was in her apartment, chillin' and chattin' as if everything were normal. Audrina mumbles about how it's "just weird" and that she doesn't know what more to say about the defrosting of this estranged friendship...and the two just exchange mute stares before the end credits start rolling.
Recap: Lauren invites Stephanie to her 'girls' night out' style birthday party at a club called S Bar...and when Stephanie reminds her that she's Spencer's sister and therefore prolly not the most desirable party guest among Spencer haters, Lauren says she's going to continue not holding that against her and would looooove for her to join her and her posse for a celebratory night on the town.
Spencer drops by Heidi's apartment to pick up his jellyfish tank and video game machines. He asks Heidi for clarification about whether or not they're still dating so he knows if he's free to date other women...and she shoots him a seriously? stink-eye and snarkishly tells him that if he's actually interesting in dating someone other than her, he should go ahead and do that. Spencer grumbles that she doesn't care about him hooking up with other women, and Heidi makes it clear that she's not remotely interested in dating anyone else...and that if he truly wants to jump back into the dating pool, they should probably break up. Spencer cheekily retorts, "I thought we were broken up", and Heidi wearily threatens to punch him in the face if he doesn't immediately stop talking.
Over at Hillside Villas, Lauren tells Lo that she invited Stephanie to her S Bar birthday party...and that it's more than likely to drive Spencer around the bend.
Stephanie returns home and is less than thrilled to see that Spencer has deposited his jellyfish tank and video game machines in the middle of her living room. She's all the fuck? and orders this stuff to be gone by tomorrow...then starts railing about the general aimlessness of his unemployed, homeless existence. Spencer informs her that he's officially launched Operation Win Heidi Back At Any Cost, but doesn't elaborate further 'cause he's worried she's going to blab about his grand plans to Lauren [as if she could possibly be interested in the inner workings of his relationship with Heidi]. He then orders his sister out of the living room, aka his personal space while he's squatting in her home, so he can lounge atop the couch and watch TV...and an incredulous Stephanie tells him that the jellyfish tank and video game machines better be out of her place by tomorrow. Or else.
Kimberly is working the front door of S Bar when Stephanie and her friend Roxy arrive for Lauren's party. Inside the club, Lauren is having a blast, blowing out the candles on her birthday cake, and dancing in her usual 'arms above the head' fashion. She warmly greets Stephanie and Roxy, then introduces them to Audrina and Lo, who are openly incredulous about how they're suddenly expected to socialize with Spencer's sister. They grumble their 'blood is always going to be thicker than water' concerns while sitting at a table across from where Lauren is laying it on thick to Stephanie about how awesome it is that she and Roxy are at her party. The three then yell, "Cheers!" to Audrina and Lo, who reluctantly return the happy woot.
The next day at Bolthouse, Kimberly dutifully reports to Heidi that Stephanie showed up as an invited guest to Lauren's birthday party at S Bar, and Heidi scrunches her face confusedly while murmuring, "That can't be right." Kimberly assures her it did, in fact, happen, and that she witnessed Stephanie sitting at Lauren's table for much of the evening. Heidi says she simply can't grasp Lauren's logic in shunning her while becoming friends with Spencer's own sister...and intends to ask Stephanie what in blazes is going on.
Heidi phones Spencer to inform him that Stephanie attended Lauren's birthday party, and Spencer's all, "Wuh?? That has to be a joke." He says he can't believe this is happening, then mumbles about how Stephanie is "like Brody junior over here".
Lauren meets up with Brody for lunch and acknowledges how weird she was to him when she ran into him at Les Deux the other night...and he tells her his new girlfriend's name is Cora and that she'd really like her. Lauren says that she, on the other hand, doesn't have much of a love life these days - but, on the upside, is getting A's in her FIDM classes. She adds that Stephanie is in her computer class, and thus far has found her to be a nice girl. Brody says he knows Stephanie pretty well, and warns that she might have an ulterior motive for befriending her...and wouldn't put it past the Pratts if this budding friendship was all some sort of unguided sinister plot.
Spencer gives Stephanie the what for for attending Lauren's birthday party, and sarcastically asks her if she also plans to start hanging out with his Brody, aka his ex-bestie. Stephanie tells him that Lauren hasn't said a single unkind thing about him and/or Heidi - but an unmoved Spencer just stares at her in utter incredulity and says that he doesn't get how she doesn't get how disloyal she's being. Stephanie tears up and says she hopes to be the bridge that can make Heidi's/Lauren's friendship whole again and asks him why he insists on continuing on with this boresome feud, and Spencer dismissively accuses her of making herself cry 'cause of how guilty she feels about becoming friends with the enemy.
At FIDM, Stephanie tells Lauren that Spencer was a monumental jerk about her attending her birthday party, and that his cold admonishment made her cry. Lauren clucks sympathetically at the familial pressure she's currently under and assures her she did nothing wrong.
Stephanie drops by Heidi's apartment to further beat the dead horse that was her presence at Lauren's S Bar party. Heidi sullenly says she heard the news from Kimberly, and was thoroughly dismayed 'cause she considers them to be best friends and practically sisters. Stephanie tells her she knows how much she wants to be friends with Lauren again, then comes right out and asks her what she and Spencer did to Lauren that caused the seismic rift. Heidi snaps, "Nothing!" and says she's infuriated that she'd even think she were capable of spreading a sex tape rumor. She then urges caution about getting close to Lauren, 'cause one day she's your best friend, and then another...not so much.
Recap: Lauren is in her class at FIDM when the teacher starts a roll call, which includes the name Stephanie Pratt. As Lauren's all, "Wha-a-a?!", Stephanie rushes into the room and takes her seat, and is as shocked as Lauren to learn that - surprise! - they're both in the same computer class.
Whitney arrives at People's Revolution in New York just prior to Fashion Week and is quickly briefed by Kelly Cutrone about her duties for the day: stand around and be as helpful as possible during the Sass & Bide fitting. Whitney assures her new boss that she's willing to do whatever it takes to be a successful stylist helper (?) ... and a few seconds later, Kelly introduces her to Sarah Jane and Heidi, aka the Sass & Bide designers, and says they'll all likely be working late into the night.
Back at FIDM, Stephanie is texting Heidi about her Lauren sighting...and Heidi reads the message while lunching with Kimberly, calling the [non]coincidence "so crazy". She texts Stephanie back, jokingly urging her to say hi to Lauren, at the same time Stephanie is sneaking a peek over at Lauren, who's texting Audrina...who's at Epic Records and squealing to Chiara about how Lauren currently finds herself trapped in a classroom with Spencer's sister. Chiara chuckles, "Poor Lauren."
At the Sass & Bide fitting, Whitney offers the designers some particularly useful input about whether or not some scarily tight leather pants (on one of the models) could be in the 'ready to wear' category. Or some such thing.
At Hillside Villas, Lauren cackles with Audrina over the "random" coincidence of Stephanie Pratt being enrolled in the same FIDM computer class as her. Lauren says she'd have no issue if this were a bigger class in a lecture hall, as opposed to a small group of sixteen students - but then shrugs and says [that despite the MTV camera crew hoping to capture some juicy 'you know what you did!' type screaming matches] she just wants to get through the class with as little hostility and drama as possible.
The next day at FIDM, Stephanie ambles over to where Lauren is sitting and apologizes for her bitchitude during the A Night At the Opera episode, and Lauren says she too is sorry if she came off like a bitch. Stephanie sheepishly explains that she was [over]reacting to her brother and Heidi being upset from all the fallout of sex tape-gate, declines to further elaborate on the [now tiresome] feud, and acknowledges that she's well aware of what a complete horse's ass her brother can be. Lauren says she gets that she's protective of her brother and future sister-in-law - but didn't like being yelled at in a nightclub...however, greatly appreciates her sincere apology.
Back in New York, the Sass & Bide team is primping and assembling the models for the fashion show. The designers make it a point to tell Kelly Cutrone that Whitney was extremely helpful last night and seemed to know her way around 'ready to wear' (or not) tight leather pants...while Whitney is getting instructions on how to line up the models in proper order and send them out to the runway. The show seems to run largely without a hitch...and afterwards, Kelly applauds Whitney for the great job she did, and promises that when they get back to L.A., her role will be expanded [though not really, 'cause she's well aware of the time commitments involved when filming for The Hills].
Heidi has enlisted Stephanie to help her paint her living room a deep green...and Heidi remarks on how this was the color of the apartment she first shared with Lauren. She then tells Stephanie she thinks it's HI-larious that she's in the same computer class as Lauren and jokes that they should become friends...and Stephanie's like, "Well, actually.." and tells her she did, in fact, apologize to Lauren for her boorish behavior at Opera and vowed henceforth to keep her nose out of the Heidi/Spencer/Lauren fracas. Heidi shoots her a troubled 'seriously?' look, then quietly resumes painting her living room wall.
While out at Lola's, Lauren, Audrina, and Lo discuss the interesting turn of events regarding Stephanie Pratt. When Audrina and Lo try to counsel Lauren to be wary of trusting Stephanie, Lauren insists that there's no real risk involved 'cause her plan is to simply not get into public arguments with the She-Pratt.
Heidi and Kimberly are tottering around town in their stilettos, discussing the awkwardness of Stephanie's budding friendship with Lauren. Heidi says she simply can't grasp how Lauren can be friends with Spencer's own sister while continuing to shun her...and Kimberly somehow refrains from pointing out that, to anyone's knowledge, Stephanie had nothing to do with the crux of Lauren's beef with her and Spencer: sex tape-gate.
While eating takeout, Spencer grumbles at Stephanie that since she's about to go clubbing with Brody and his posse and attends a FIDM class with Lauren, he can no longer count on her to be on his side. Stephanie insists she's not a disloyal sister, but then calls him immature, lame, and a homeless loser...and expresses incredulousness that a hottie like Heidi would even contemplate coupling with him. Spencer's just like, "La la la...I don't even hear you anymore" and says that, from this point on, he's firmly keeping his mouth shut around her.
At FIDM the next day, Lauren and Stephanie lunch outside and chat about their computer class...and also how annoying it is for Stephanie to be saddled with a brother who's squatting in her apartment. She tells Lauren that Spencer no longer trusts her because of their budding friendship...and Lauren clucks sympathetically, but points out that it's silly to penalize her for being a good person. Lauren expresses some half-hearted worry that she's going to get Stephanie in trouble for hanging out with her, and Stephanie agrees that, yep, when Spencer finds out that they're fast becoming friends, it ain't going to be pretty.
Recap: Lauren bursts into her apartment - newly returned from Paris! - and gives Audrina a happy hello hug. She says she's still jet lagged, didn't have a whole lot of downtime throughout the week, but looooooooved getting out of L.A. for a few days. She adds that she now fully realizes there's guys other than Brody in the world and is over the sudden collapse of their pretend romance. She then changes the subject and reports that Whitney no longer wants to work for Teen Vogue.
Whitney meets with Lisa Love to discuss her career aspirations, namely her passion for stylingk. Lisa tells her she doesn't currently have this type of position available at Teen Vogue...and so gives her her blessing to pursue an opportunity with the woman who's about to become her Hills mentor-in-the-fashion-world replacement: Kelly Cutrone at People's Revolution.
Over at Bolthouse, Heidi tells Kimberly she's still trying to sort through whatever contrived dysfunction is escalating between herself and Spencer...and, to that end, has asked him to move out. She admits that it'll be heart-wrenching to watch him pack up his computer and Xbox games, but firmly believes it's the right thing for both of them. Kimberly asks her if either of them plan to see other people during the separation, but Heidi looks aghast at the prospect and says she can't even fathom getting into the laughable predicament of competing with other women for the affection of a malevolent Chucky doll lookalike.
Spencer tells Stephanie about his surprise trip to Crested Butte, and she says that by the sound of it, it was an utter disaster for him. Spencer laments how deeply annoyed he is at Heidi for asking him to move out, and says had he known this was going to happen he never would have asked her to move in with him in the first place. He tells Stephanie she's welcome to hang out with Heidi during their trial separation - but not at her (Stephanie's) apartment, given that that's where he's going to be squatting, and he doesn't want Heidi to accuse him of not giving her her space. He then mumbles about how much he hates the thought of re-entering the dating pool, but nevertheless is pretending to consider it.
Over in the Teen Vogue closet office, Whitney tells Lauren that Lisa was supportive of her decision to move on from the magazine...and that it's given her a boost of confidence for her upcoming job interview with Kelly Cutrone. Lauren says she's happy for her - but also a bit sad, 'cause she hasn't known this faux internship without her.
The next day, Whitney arrives at People's Revolution for her job interview...and as she waits for Kelly Cutrone to present herself, she can hear her snarling about something or other from her office. A few seconds later, Kelly - in all of her unfiltered glory - enters the area, introduces herself to Whitney, and gives her a brief description of her company...which apparently spends about 85% of its time and resources on styling. Whitney makes her case for why she's the ideal candidate by describing herself as a potential asset when it comes to styling models during photoshoots, for their look books, and in preparation of runway shows. Kelly says she's impressed enough by Lisa Love's strong recommendation that she's totes willing to take a leap of faith and hire her [though part time so that it doesn't interfere too much with her Hills filming schedule] - but warns, "You're basically making a deal with the devil." When Whitney's all, "Wuh? Why would you say such an ominous thing?", Kelly explains that by taking a job with People's Revolution she'll be giving up her life - but in exchange will get a whole new one.
While out for lunch, Stephanie strongly hints to Heidi that Spencer might want to date other people...and Heidi's all, "Wha-a-a-a?!" and reiterates that they're not broken up, merely temporarily separating. Stephanie shrugs and tells her that people do crazy things when they're mad...and Heidi scrunches her face quizzically while insisting that she really does love the dumb loafer.
Over at Hillside Villas, Lauren and Audrina plan a night out at Les Deux. Audrina warns that Brody might show up with his new gal - but then the two agree to just go out and have fun like the 'fully single, ready-to-mingle' gals that they are.
Hours later, Lauren and Audrina are partying at Les Deux...and when Brody and Frankie arrive, Lauren hugs Frankie hello - but pointedly ignores Brody as he awaits his hug. When Brody's all, "Whassup with you snubbing me?", Lauren responds by passive-aggressively asking, "Where's your girlfriend?" ... and Brody acts all confused about what she's talking about, then inquires about her Paris boyfriend. He calls her sudden hostility ridiculous and gets so irked that he announces he's outa here...and when Frankie chides Lauren for her rude bitchitude, she retorts that she really doesn't feel like being nice right now.
While eating out the next day, Lauren tells Lo about Whitney's new job at People's Revolution...and when Lo asks her why she seems so glum, she says it was really awkward seeing Brody last night, even without his new girlfriend in tow. She says that somehow Brody always makes her feel as if she isn't good enough, and Lo calls that poppycock and advises her to work on finding a nice guy who isn't Brody.
Spencer is packing up his stuff, while Heidi supervises and reminds him that they're not actually separating in the 'broken up' sense. The two haggle over who owns what books, Xboxes, and television sets...and when Spencer is all packed up, he wearily says, "Enjoy your space" and heads out, while Heidi poutishly stares after him.
Whitney packs up her stuff from her Teen Vogue workstation and tells Lauren she's feeling happy, excited, nervous, and a little sad that they're no longer going to be seeing each other every day. The two joke about having to maintain a long distance relationship, then reminisce about the pilot episode, when Heidi et. al. crashed Teen Vogue's Young Hollywood party. Whitney jokes that they should have known then that she was bad news, then gives Lauren a goodbye hug as the two exchange I love yous.
Spencer puts his stuff in the trunk of his car and drives off, while Heidi continues to stare despondently into space.
Whitney is carrying her box of stuff to her car, while Lauren stares sadly at her friend's now vacant workstation.
Recap: Lauren and Whitney arrive in Paris and are promptly greeted by a hot local named Stephane, who ends up being their personal driver for the week. As the gals climb into their limo, Stephane hands them an itinerary that specifies various tasks in the order in which they're to be completed...and when Lauren and Whitney decide to bypass the order and pick up their ballgowns first - as opposed to retrieving the shoes needed for a photoshoot first thing in the morning - Stephane scrunches his handsome face concernedly.
Across the pond in Crested Butte (Colorado), Heidi [whose lips are looking noticeably poutier than before the hiatus] is enjoying a day of downhill skiing with her mom, Darlene. The two enter a cafe and order some hot cocoa, and Heidi says she's been thinking a lot about her relationship with Spencer...and Darlene strongly suggests she think less about that Chucky doll lookalike and more about how she can improve herself and determine what she wants out of life.
Lauren and Whitney arrive at Alberta Ferretti to pick up their ballgowns, then rush back to the limo and ask Stephane to help them cross item #1 off their list: pick up the shoes for the photoshoot from a store named Collette. They get slightly panicked when the store is already closed by the time they get there, then make a plan to return first thing in the morning. Whitney says, in hindsight, they probably should have gotten the shoes first - but figured that since they literally just got off the plane and are spending the week in Paris to function more as reality stars than Teen Vogue staff, someone actually employed by the magazine would, no doubt, have retrieved the shoes prior to now if the errand was truly that important.
Stephanie stops by Spencer's apartment, which is in a terrible state of disarray now that Heidi's not around to do the house cleaning. Stephanie's all, "Wuh?" when she learns that Heidi left town to visit her family in Colorado, and tells Spencer that this development wouldn't be such a bad sign for him if Heidi's parents didn't regard him as a moronic halfwit. Spencer mulls over the idea of jetting to Crested Butte to woo his beloved back to L.A. - but Stephanie advises him to do the opposite of what his generally horrible instincts are currently telling him to do.
The next morning - at Le Grand Hotel in Paris (!) - Lauren and Whitney look over their itinerary/to do list and agree to instruct Stephane to get them to Collette asap to pick up the shoes, and then hightail it over to the Crillon Hotel for the photoshoot.
Spencer lands in Crested Butte, rents an SUV, and arrives at Casa Egelhoff, much to the visible dismay of Heidi's step-dad, Tim. He's all, "What the heck?" and tells Spencer he could/should have phoned prior to showing up announced, so Spencer explains that Heidi isn't taking his calls right now. Tim says he's mildly OK with him being part of the picture, as long as he fully grasps that, within the Egelhoff orbit, Heidi is always going to be their priority. When Spencer reacts to that by just staring mutely into space, Tim sighs and says he supposes it'd be OK for him to wait inside the house until Heidi and Darlene return from their ski day.
Lauren and Whitney arrive at the Crillon Hotel, deliver the Collette shoes...and then check in with Kimball, who assigns Lauren to help out in the hair and makeup area, while Whitney is to jot down any interesting quotes and anecdotes about the models/debutantes. Whitney makes kind of a yeech face at that task, while Lauren slips away to call Audrina to see whassup in L.A. ... and learns that Brody was spotted at Les Deux with a woman he's telling everyone is his girlfriend. Lauren reports this "troubling" development to Whitney, who can't seem to keep herself from openly chuckling about how it took a mere two days for Brody to move on from their pretend romance...then hastily points out to Lauren that Paris is full of guys who are très cooler than Brody.
Under the watchful glare of Tim's disdain, Spencer is fiddling with his phone when Heidi and her mom finally return home from skiing...and Heidi pretends to be shocked to see him [and the MTV camera crew] camped out in her living room. As Spencer hands Heidi a bouquet of roses, she asks him what the hell he's doing here, and makes it clear that she's not at all happy about this unexpected pop-in.
Lauren and Whitney meet up at a club with a French rock band they apparently met (off camera) in L.A. The guitarist (Matthias) tells his bandmates on the down low that he thinks Lauren is cute...then asks Lauren, who's sitting across the table, if she's seen the Eiffel Tower yet. She says she hasn't, so he suggests they grab a bottle of champagne and head over there now...and a few minutes later, Lauren, Whitney and the French band are all standing under the iconic landmark, toasting it with a loud, "Cheers!"
The next day at Le Grand Hotel, Matthias calls Lauren to invite her and Whitney out to a fancy club called Neo that evening. Lauren mulls over the wardrobe she brought to Paris, and realizes that - for some unearthly reason - she mostly just brought pencil skirts in lieu of something appropriate for a formal night out on the town. Whitney laughingly points out that they always have their ballgowns, and Lauren contemplatively stares over at her ballgown and says she knows of a foolproof way to shorten the skirt by sewing a running stitch along the hemline. Whitney reminds her that she has to wear this gown to the Crillon Ball tomorrow and makes it clear that she thinks this is a very bad idea - but Lauren breezily assures her it'll be fine [which we can all assume means a problem is in store].
Heidi and her parents are dining at Timberline restaurant, and Spencer's presence is making for a tension-filled meal. Heidi raises her glass for a toast, and makes it a point to limit her praise to her loving and supportive parents...while Spencer sits across from her at the table, grinning like an idiot. Heidi asks her mom to reiterate what she was saying earlier in the episode about respecting a person's space, so Darlene tells Spencer that Heidi wants to work on some [desperately needed] self-improvement and is hoping he's not averse to giving her some breathing room. Spencer says he's A-OK with whatever Heidi needs, apologizes for showing up in Crested Butte unannounced, and assures the Egelhoffs that he fully intends to treat Heidi with the respect she deserves...all while Tim is staring over at him with a look of unveiled scorn. LOL.
Lauren and Whitney arrive at Neo and once again meet up with the French band. An escort for the Crillon Ball debutantes (Edoardo) decides he too wants to be featured on The Hills Goes to Paris...and when he arrives at the club, he chit-chats at length with Lauren, much to the irritation of Matthias. After glaring at Edoardo for several minutes, Matthias asks Lauren if this dork is her new best friend, but she emphatically says, "Nope, I'm single" ... then says she's very sad to have to leave Paris without having had a chance to see very much of the city. As the evening comes to a close, Edoardo hugs and kisses Lauren goodbye...and Matthias pouts and glares at him some more before running out of the club after Lauren to make hasty plans for one last rendezvous tomorrow night.
Back at Le Grand Hotel, Whitney remarks on the general weirdness of Edoardo, then laments the lack of styling she was allowed to do at today's photoshoot. Lauren, meanwhile, is busily removing the running stitch from her ballgown when she notices unsightly brown stains all over the fabric. She's all 'the fuck?!' and insists that the stains weren't there last night...and upon further investigation realizes that it was her hot curling iron that burned various parts of the dress. Whitney retrieves the business card she got from the sales guy at Alberta Ferretti and calls him to inquire about getting a replacement ballgown for one that has an unspecified stain on it...and when he's seemingly dickish about how this isn't his problem, Whitney diplomatically replies that she'd appreciate it greatly if he could just be a damn mensch and help them out. He tells her he just happens to have a spare ballgown in Lauren's size laying around - but that she must come by the store pronto...or she can attend the Crillon Ball dressed in her stained rag of a ruined dress for all he cares.
While en route to Alberta Ferretti, a sheepish Lauren implores Whitney not to mention this mishap to the ever-uptight Kimball. When Stephane pulls up to the store, Lauren jumps out of the car, retrieves her replacement gown, and promises the sales guy she'll do her best to not ruin this one.
Over a cup of hot tea at the Crested Butte Brewery, Heidi asks Spencer when he plans to leave Colorado, and he's like, "I can't get outa here soon enough" and adds that he totally regrets making the trip. The two nonsensically bicker about why they've been bickering so much lately, blah blah...until Heidi snappishly lays out the conditions of them moving ahead (or not) with their unholy coupling:
Lauren and Whitney arrive at the Crillon Ball and get their latest superfluous assignments from Kimball. Whitney is instructed to hold up signs specifying which debutante is wearing which designer...and looks less than thrilled to be doing this type of low level grunt work.
Later, Kimball asks Whitney how she thinks the ball is going and whether or not she's enjoyed carrying out the downright silly tasks he's been assigning her during this Paris episode. She tells him how much she looooooves being part of all of the fashion and excitement and is grateful for her time at Teen Vogue - but would really prefer to be more directly involved with the stylingk aspect of the fashion industry. Kimball, in his usual haughty-contemptuous manner, says it's fairly obvious how lackluster she's been about the trivialness of her role during the Crillon Ball, and that she should feel free to go elsewhere to pursue her passion while simultaneously filming more Hills episodes.
When the Crillon Ball wraps up, Matthias offers to give Lauren a tour of Paris on his Vespa, so she gathers the billowy skirt of her ballgown and climbs onto the bike behind him. They ride along the Seine and past the Eiffel Tower...and later drops her off at Le Grand Hotel and blows her one last kiss.
The next morning, Whitney tells Lauren she's had an awakening about wanting to do more than pretend office work in the Teen Vogue closet office and is looking to venture into the stylingk side of the fashion world, capping off her life decision by saying, "It's kind of, I think, my time. You know?"
Spencer bids Heidi adieu, and she says she half-heartedly appreciates him making the effort to fly to Colorado to woo her back - but makes it clear that she's going to need more time to ponder their situation. She promises to call him as soon as she returns to L.A.
Lauren and Whitney are ready to head to the airport...and they agree that while it was soooo cool to attend the Crillon Ball, it's definitely time to get this reality show back to America.
Spencer hugs Heidi goodbye, then drives off...and a sad looking Heidi stares after his SUV rental.
Lauren and Whitney look visibly pensive as Stephane transports them to Charles De Gaulle Airport.