The Facts of Life - Season 8, Episode 21

"Turns out I prefer old broads."

"Younger Than Springtime"
Original airdate: 3/21/1987

Episode summary: Jo is shocked when her dad starts dating a woman thirty years his junior.

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Recap: Andy excitedly bursts into the living room to tell Beverly Ann that his favorite heavy metal band, The Walking Dead, is going to be in New York next week and he really really wants to go. Beverly Ann says, "Sure" and that she'll happily get them a couple of tickets, and Andy makes a face and says he'd much prefer to go without her, given that none of his friends are going to be supervised at the concert by their moms. A few seconds later, Tootie and Natalie enter the room...and when Andy tries to get them to help make the case as to why he should be able to see The Walking Dead without adult supervision, Tootie contorts her face in disgust and says that at a recent concert, the lead singer took off his pants and ate them, while Natalie recalls that another band member recently set fire to a bunch of shit.

Jo gabbles excitedly about her dad coming to Peekskill for a visit this episode, and Blair says she's really looking forward to seeing "the sweet guy". Beverly Ann asks what he's like, and Jo kind of shrugs and says he's just a regular guy...and that she's mostly looking forward to meeting his new gal, Marlene. A few seconds later, Charlie arrives, warmly greets all the Facts gals, and is introduced for the first time to Beverly Ann. Jo asks about Marlene's whereabouts, and he breezily says she couldn't make it, then heads over to the nearest bathroom to wash up. Once he's out of earshot, Blair clucks sympathetically and says it's written all over Charlie's face that he's just been dumped, and Jo's all, "Wuh? Nah.." Blair urges her to be a comfort to her fragile pa, but Jo insists that her dad is resilient, if indeed he has just been dumped, and is going to be just fine.

When Charlie re-enters the room, Blair tells him, "Be strong" and heads off to the store...and when a tentative Jo asks him how everything in his life is going, he correctly assumes that she figured out the truth about Marlene giving him the heave-ho. Jo says that instead of staying in a motel by himself all weekend, he's welcome to bunk in their living room, and he's like, "Great!" and rushes out to the car to get his suitcase.

"So...how's everything in your life?"

"Is it that obvious I've been dumped?"

Later in the communal bedroom, Blair tells Jo that Charlie is clearly depressed about the dumping, and that the best way to get over a broken relationship is to start a new one. When she offers to set him up with someone, Jo emphatically barks, "No!" and hastily exits the room. Blair then picks up the phone and calls her friend Cynthia and invites both her and her mom to a museum outing.

Andy snarks at Natalie and Tootie for kiboshing his chance to attend The Walking Dead concert and tries to guilt them into getting Beverly Ann to change her mind - but the most they're willing to do is advise him to be thoughtful, do stuff around the house, and kiss up to his adoptive ma at every opportunity. Andy mulls that over and decides 'yep, I can do that'. 

Beverly Ann returns home with a bag of groceries, and Andy rushes over to her, takes the bag and offers to put the items away. When Charlie witnesses the good deed and asks her if he's always this helpful, she explains that the kid is only sucking up to her so that she'll let him go to a concert. Charlie advises her to give in and passes along the sage advice: "sometimes you have to let go to hold kids closer". 

Cynthia and her mom (Maggie) arrive, and Blair promptly introduces the two to Charlie as Jo stares daggers at her. Blair then announces that she, Cynthia, and Maggie are off to the museum and invites Charlie along, and he says he's game...then wryly agrees with Maggie that this definitely feels like a non-subtle set-up. Blair excitedly assures Jo that Charlie and Maggie are perfect for each other, then happily dashes off.

"Hello handsome."

"The young one's over eighteen, right?"

Later, Blair tells Jo that the museum outing worked out great, and that Charlie had an awesome time with Maggie and her daughter. A few seconds later, Charlie returns home looking visibly perky and gaily tells Jo he had a super fun time. He then starts putting on a tie and announces that he's off to a French restaurant for a romantic evening...and when Blair smugly tells Jo, "I told you so", Jo is forced to admit that she did a good thing by setting Charlie up with her friend's mom.

That evening, the doorbell rings, and it's Cynthia (!) who steps inside to see what's keeping her date. Charlie grimaces and reminds her that he told her to wait in the car...and she reacts by looking completely TV trope-ishly oblivious of the awkwardness of being stared at in speechless horror by Jo and Blair. When she and Charlie head off on their date, a sheepish looking Blair nervously giggles before she and Jo race up the stairs. 

"You can call me mom if you want."

"I'd much prefer lassie."

A startled Blair tells Jo that she definitely didn't see this coming - just as Tootie and Natalie enter the bedroom to ask whassup. Jo snarlingly informs them that stupid Blair stuck her nose where it didn't belong, and as a result her dad is dating someone thirty years his junior. Natalie breezily says it's only one date, while Tootie points out that every marriage starts with one date. Jo's all, "Ack!" and shakes her head while lamenting the embarrassment of having to watch her middle-aged, divorced dad hitting the town with an extremely young woman.

Later, Jo is reclining on the couch, pretending to read a magazine, when Charlie returns home from his date. He asks Jo whaddup with her strange behavior and urges her to come right out and tell him what's on her mind...so she's like, "Uh, OK" and tells him how much she haaaaates him dating Cynthia, and that he looks like a ridiculous old fool, hooking up with a woman who's literally young enough to be his daughter. Charlie angrily snaps, "How dare you talk to me like that!" and says that Cynthia makes him feel special, and that he hoped his own daughter would be happy for him. Jo falls silent and hangs her head shamefully and promises to try, and he thanks her and gives her a fatherly cheek kiss.

"Your mid-life crisis is an embarrassment."

"Yeah, I was afraid of that."

Andy is wearing headphones that are blasting the weird punk/heavy metal drudgery of The Walking Dead into his ears when Beverly Ann wanders over and asks him if she can have a quick listen...but after a few seconds of the noise, she contorts her face in horror and hastily gives him the headphones back. She tells him she's decided to allow him to attend the concert, regardless of how grisly the band seems, and Andy happily hugs her and scampers off to give his friends the good news.

Charlie arrives home with Cynthia after a tennis match and tells Jo and his new girlfriend to get to know each other for a minutes while he goes upstairs to change. Cynthia smugly tells Jo that she and "Chuck" are going into New York City tonight - but adds that, as far as she's concerned, they're only casually dating. Jo looks alarmed and says it's clear that her dad is serious about their budding romance, but Cynthia just shrugs and says she can't be responsible for how the old goat feels, and that since she's only twenty-three, she has plans to hook up with a lot of different guys for the foreseeable future. As Jo mulls over that troubling over-share, Charlie re-enters the room, and he and his gal pal leave.

Beverly Ann tells Jo that she let Andy go to The Walking Dead concert...but arranged for Tootie, Natalie, and Blair to go incognito and keep an eye on him.

Later, Andy returns home with his hair gelled and dyed with multiple colors and a tiny skeleton hanging off one ear. He raves about what a great time he had at the concert - just as a shell-shocked Tootie, Natalie, and Blair return home and stiffly say that "the movie" they went to see was extremely loud and psychologically disturbing. Andy chuckles and tells Beverly Ann it doesn't look like they enjoyed The Walking Dead's performance much...and when she stares back at him in shocked sheepishness, he makes it clear that he doesn't mind having been secretly chaperoned by three Facts gals.

Charlie returns home from his date and informs Jo that he finally came to his senses and broke things off with Cynthia, and now knows that if he wants to hang with someone thirty years younger, he can spend time with his actual daughter. He adds that he came to the realization that he'd much prefer to date "an old broad" who's at more of a similar stage of life as he is, and Jo chuckles and assures him that he's still the hippest guy in town...and when he mutters something incoherent about Cynthia and a skeleton earring, the episode comes to an odd, abrupt end.

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