The Facts of Life - Season 4, Episode 7

"I'm not sexist...I just feel more comfortable when women are subservient to men."

"A Woman's Place"
Original airdate: 11/24/1982

Episode summary: Jo's budding romance with a fellow mechanic sours after she - and not he - is offered a promotion.

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Recap: Mrs. Garrett notices Natalie hitting the books in the cafeteria and praises her for being so focused on her schoolwork for the past several hours. Natalie explains that she's studying psychology and is utterly fascinated with the complexity of the brain. Jo bursts in with her friend Doug, who she's been working with at the motorcycle shop for the last five weeks. She excitedly tells the Facts gals that today she fixed a totally "dead bike", and her boss Garo looked it over and grunted, "Huh. It works" - which, for him, is extraordinarily high praise. Jo thanks Doug for convincing Garo to hire her, which wasn't an easy sell 'cause normally the curmudgeon would never consider employing females. Doug explains to the gals that Garo is "old fashioned" about women.

Blair enters the cafeteria and announces that she broke daddy's Porsche - aka his pride and joy - and is worried he's going to freak out and do something drastic, like cut off her credit. She turns to Mrs. Garrett and wails, "What do I dooooo?!" then suddenly perks up and says, "I know! I'll just buy him a new one!" but then looks despondent again and says he'd probably be able to tell the difference. Jo asks her exactly what she did to the car, so she sheepishly says she accidentally shifted from third to reverse, then starts panicking again 'cause she needs to return the car to her father by Friday. Jo tells her if she brings it into the motorcycle shop she'll try to fix it...and Blair looks unsure 'bout that, but agrees when Jo points out that she has no other options. Doug tells Jo he's going to head out now - but that he'll come by at 7:30pm so they can grab a pizza and catch a movie. Tootie, who I notice hasn't had a storyline during the last several episodes, gets all in their faces and chirps, "That sounds great!" Blair shoots Jo the stink-eye and wails, "How can you play modern romance when daddy’s car is fighting for its life?” and Jo snarks back that she and Doug have a business relationship, nothing more. A skeptical Tootie asks if that's really true, and Jo snaps at her to mind her own damn business. 

"You can't leave daddy's car high and dry while you go on a date."

"It's a business-related pizza and movie."

At the motorcycle shop, Doug compliments Jo on her kick-ass work in fixing a bike's engine, then tells her he really really enjoyed their evening at the arcade. The two lean toward each other and smooch - then quickly break apart when Garo stomps in, refers to Jo as Joan of Arco, and asks her how the Warner's Porsche is coming along. She tells him it's going pretty good - and Garo grumpishly asks her if she's really a girl, tells her she's good for business, and thanks her for expanding his business by bringing in an expensive car to fix. He tells Doug he's glad he listened to him about hiring her, gushes about her extensive knowledge of motorcycles, and leaves. Jo and Doug play kissy-face again, and this time they're interrupted by Mrs. Garrett and the rest of the Facts gals. Blair looks horrified at the sight of daddy's car in pieces and wails, "What happened?!" so Jo explains that she usually has to take a car apart before it can be fixed and properly put back together again. Garo comes over to see whassup, and doesn't look thrilled by all the females suddenly milling around his garage, so Jo explains that they came by to check up on the Porsche. Mrs. Garrett tells Garo about what a super awesome mechanic Jo is [in case viewers missed hearing it the first ten times], and he mumbles, "I know" then barks at Mrs. Garrett to keep her mitts off of his tools. LOL. He then chooses that moment to make a special announcement, and prefaces it by explaining that the weekend Service Manager, Rex, has just resigned. He pats Jo on the head and says, "Congratulations. You got the job" and Mrs. Garrett and the Facts gals gather around Jo and squeal excitedly...but when Jo looks over at Doug to get his reaction, she's met with a pissy scowl.

"Congratulations, Jo! You've been promoted to head grease-monkey."

"Uh oh. This isn't going to be good for our budding romance."

Later, Doug is pissily throwing tools around...and when Jo asks him whassup, he snaps, "Nuthin'." When she tries to advise him on what might be wrong with the engine he's currently working on, he gets all snappish and says if he's not doing it right she should do it herself. She calmly explains that sometimes the problem is electrical (not mechanical - the conclusion he always seems to jump to), and he screeches, "You're the boss!" and whines about how her promotion has discombobulated his male sensibilities and metamorphosed him into a passive-aggressive moody girl-child. She reminds him that they're still a team, and he snaps, "I work for you now" then storms out of the garage like the insecure, immature little dickwad he's quickly proving himself to be.

When Jo arrives home, Blair asks her how the Porsche is coming along, and she barks, "It'll be ready on time! Get off my case!" Blair looks taken aback and goes, "OK, OK. Whatever you say. You're the boss" and that last remark triggers a rant from Jo about about how people keep calling her the boss. A puzzled Mrs. Garrett asks her whaddup with her sudden bitchitude...and Natalie tiptoes over and quietly informs her that, based on her psychology readings, it appears to be "a classic case of latent psychosis with neurotic overtones". Haha! Jo grumbles about how today was supposed to be a great day - a chance to prove herself in her new job - but, everything got ruined 'cause Doug acted like a bitchy, oversensitive prick the entire time. Tootie points out that he's probably disappointed that he wasn't promoted, and Jo says she gets that, but figured he was a liberated enough guy to at least be happy for her. Natalie tells her that that doesn't usually  happen in real life situations, and that a lot of guys can't handle reporting to a woman. Mrs. Garrett argues that not all men are like that, then reveals that she used to date Howard the Cook during the time she was his supervisor. Um...OK. Not only is that hook-up a retroactively disturbing visual alert...but it's also very weird that the writers would throw a shout-out to Howard in the script of a feminist-centric episode, considering the blatant sexist douchebaggery with which he was introduced in Season's The New Girl, Part 2 episode:

Mrs. Garrett tells Howard the Cook that he no longer needs to find kitchen help; he now has four helpers! Howard nods approvingly and dickishly declares, "A woman's place is in the kitchen" and he gets a lot of boos from the studio audience and is appropriately referred to as a chauvinist pig by Natalie.

Mrs. Garrett tells Jo to treat Doug with respect, and maybe he'll respond by being more secure in his masculinity...'cause, yeah, that's realistic. Blair, meanwhile, dispenses her pearls of wisdom:

• No man is an island [nor is any person]
• Always let the boy win [fuck that shit]

She explains that things at the garage would probably run a lot smoother if Doug were led to believe that he's the one in charge (despite it not matching up with reality) and adds that it wouldn't kill her to act like a helpless damsel every once in awhile. Natalie, who's all brushed up on the issue from reading her psychology books, agrees that the male ego can be a major pig to deal with, but backpedals when she insists that women of the '80s should be able to have it all. Or at least shouldn't have to be treated like a bag of shit from an idiot teenage boy who can't get comfortable with a female supervisor.

"Treat Doug with dignity and maybe he'll stop acting like such a douchewad."

"Not according to my reading. Douchewaddery is an integral part of the fragile male ego."

Garo is ambling around the garage while Jo and a sullen Doug plug away at some bike repair. Blair and Mrs. Garrett arrive to pick up the Porsche, and Blair is thrilled when she learns that the car has been restored to its default settings. Doug, meanwhile, is continuing to act like a whiny little bitch...and Jo throws up her hands and says she has no idea what to do about it. Blair says, "Of course you do" ... so Jo rolls her eyes, then tells Doug she can't seem to find the strength to tighten one of the bolts on the bike she's working on. He comes over, easily tightens it, and smugly says, "Sometimes it just takes a little extra muscle" and Jo forces out a girlish giggle and coos, "You're so right!" Blair nods approvingly, while Mrs. Garrett looks a mixture of perplexed and icked out. Natalie and Tootie arrive at the garage and say hey to Doug, just as Garo wheels in another damaged motorcycle for Jo to look it over. She quickly does, and says it looks like the electrical system is shot - then suggests that he give it to Doug to fix, since fixing electrical stuff is his specialty. Garo looks irked by the suggestion, orders her to handle it, and saunters off. Doug tells Jo he's surprised that she praised him to Garo just now, but reminds her that Garo told her to fix it. Jo says he should go ahead and do it 'cause she suddenly thinks of herself as a silly, inept girl who doesn't know a carburetor from a piece of cardboard. Blair pulls her aside and reminds her that her advice was to act helpless - not brainless. And that she doesn't need to pretend to not know how to fix a bike. Jo grumbles that she hates acting like a dumb female at all...and Mrs. Garrett weighs in and tells her that anyone who truly cares about her will want her to be everything she can, not just what his fragile little ego is comfortable with. 

Garo sees Doug working on the bike, gets annoyed, and admonishes Jo for not doing the work herself. Jo stammers out an apology, but he cuts her off and says he's demoting her 'cause although she's a great mechanic, she sucks as a manager. After he stomps out, Doug shakes his head faux sympathetically and goes, "Tough break" and offers to take her out for pizza. She gives him an incredulous stare and says, "So...everything is OK with you, now that I'm not your boss anymore?" and Doug admits to being caught off-balance by the very confusing male/female reversal he's had to contend with this episode, and says, "I'm not a bad guy. I just need things to be a certain way." Jo mutters, "Right" and turns down his offer for pizza and 'cause she'd rather have lunch with her friends. She then smugly informs him that the bike he's working on is "running rough" not 'cause of the carburetor, but because of the timing coils. Haha! In yer face, dickwad! Doug scrunches his face in confusion and is all, "Timing coils? Wha-a?" while Jo shoots him a final glare and stalks out.

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