Recap: Kirby is so distressed by the news of her father's suicide that she races out of the mansion and into the backyard. Jeff rushes out after her, then stands over her as she kneels beside the lily pond, weeping about how she didn't get a chance to say goodbye to Papá or tell him how much she loves him. "Oh Papá!" she cries, then collapses into Jeff's arms. LOL. Blake and Detective Merrill arrive at Alexis' penthouse to inform her that Joseph offed himself, and that he left a note confessing to being the person who set the cabin fire. In the note he explained that he set the fire in an effort to stop "the evil woman from ruining another life" and prays that his death will satisfy her need for vengeance. Detective Merrill asks Alexis if she has any idea what that means, and she looks fake befuddled and says she can't imagine what was going on in the deranged majordomo's mind. Detective Merrill says he'll do his best to follow through on the case, then heads out. Once he's safely out of earshot, Alexis pours herself a glass of champagne and chuckles to Blake about what a fool Joseph was to believe that she'd ever tell Kirby about her crazed, slutty mother. She only made the threat to put him in his place - not provoke him into wanting to burn her alive. Blake argues that, aside from being a murder-seeking arsonist, Joseph was a decent, moral man...and vows to lie to Kirby so she that never finds out what a damaged wretch her mother was. Alexis laughs at his sanctimoniousness and says that Joseph was nothing more than a paid house spy who enjoyed badmouthing her. She then makes a weird accusation about Blake and Joseph's nutty wife having a little somethin' somethin' going on, and Blake glares at her and warns, "If you tell Kirby one thing about her mother, I'll finish what Joseph tried to do!" then storms toward the elevator, leaving Alexis staring after him worriedly. Over at Carrington manor, Steven is chatting with Fallon and Krystle about Joseph's shocking self-inflicted mercy killing. Fallon says she has no doubt that Alexis drove him to suicide because of the crappy way she always treated him, and Steven gets irked at the remark and snaps, "Can't you ever give her the benefit of the doubt?" Krystle chides them in her pensively gentle way for fighting with each other, so Steven switches gears and announces that Claudia is finally being released from the funny farm tomorrow. He wonders aloud if he should go pick her up...and Fallon reminds him he promised, and that it would be shitty to just not show up. Well duh. Blake arrives home and gets a warm hug from Fallon and a stiff handshake from Steven, who offers his condolences for the tragic loss of his ass-kissing majordomo. He then says he should get home to Danny and beats a hasty retreat. Blake shakes his head and mutters that he can't seem to make things right with Steven and that it feels as though they live in two different worlds. He then turns his attention to Krystle and thanks her for dropping by the mansion during this sad time, and she smiles serenely and says she knows how much the uppity manservant meant to the family. Jeff enters the room to inform Blake that Kirby has lots of questions about her father's suicide. Blake mutters that there's lots of stuff he won't be able to answer, then goes upstairs to do his best to comfort the grief-stricken girl. After he exits the room, Fallon joins Krystle on the couch and gabbles about how she, Steven, and Kirby all grew up in the mansion together...and that Joseph was always stiffly looming nearby, keeping an eye on his little girl. She then laments how desperate Joseph must have been to off himself and leave his precious daughter without parents. Blake sits by Kirby's bedside and tells her how sorry he is about her father's death. A tearful Kirby asks him why her Papá would want to burn Alexis alive, then whimpers, "What did she do to him?" Blake says it was probably more about what Alexis was planning to do to him (as in himself) - referring to her plan to take over Denver-Carrington via the merger. Blake suggests that Joseph's love and suck-up-itude for him was so boundless that he figured the only way to save his master's company from Alexis' evil clutches was to lock her inside a burning cabin...but when his grisly murder attempt got thwarted by Mark Jennings, he became so dismayed he put a bullet in his chest. Kirby mulls over Blake's completely illogical theory, decides she can definitely buy it, and bobs her head in satisfaction...while Jeff furrows his caterpillar brows and looks skeptical. Blake then tells Kirby he doesn't want her and Jeff to move out of the mansion, like ever, and says they'll always be a part of the Carrington family. He then gives her a fatherly kiss on the forehead and tiptoes out of the room.
Steven and Chris are passing the evening playing a board game in their apartment. Chris rebukes Steven for walking out on his father earlier, even though none of this is any of his business, and Steven snaps that after he offered his condolences, there wasn't a reason to hang around. Chris urges Steven to assure his homophobic father that their roommate situation is platonic, then says he got an unpleasant phone call from Sammy Jo the other day. Apparently, she got all bitchy when she learned that the father of her spawn is living with a gay man. Steven says he's not worried 'bout that and reminds Chris that he and Sammy Jo are divorced and that he has legal custody of their son. As for Blake's homophobia and judgey-ness, Steven insists he no longer cares about seeking the old goat's approval. Chris implores him to give Blake one more chance (shut up, Chris), and Steven stares contemplatively into space as he mulls over that ill-advised idea. Blake informs Krystle that the charges against Mark have been dropped. He apologizes for being so adamant about blaming the gigolo for setting the fire, and admits he let his feelings of resentment cloud his judgement. Krystle applauds his honesty and gives him another nauseating serene smile, and he excuses himself to go break the news of Joseph's suicide to the rest of the staff. Mark drops by Krystle's suite at the La Mirage to give her two pieces of good news: 1) Fallon refused to accept his resignation so he's going to stay on as head tennis instructor, and 2) the police told him he's a free man. Krystle gives him a hug and tells him she's happy for him, then says they can talk more about it in the morning. She tries to give him the bum's rush out the door - but Mark ignores the hint and steers her over to the couch, where he overthanks her for always believing in him. He touches her face and calls her "warm, tender, and loving" then describes Blake as a douchebaggy, cynical manipulator...and says he's glad she finally wised up and dumped his ass. Krystle tells him that Blake admitted he had been wrong about him and thinks it was big of him to acknowledge his error in judgement...then says it's getting late and that he really really needs to leave now. Blake is eulogizing Joseph to a roomful of tearful servants, blathering about how the suicidal arsonist was a good friend who had principles and high standards of excellence. Blake says he'll miss his bitchy, uptight manservant dearly and coos, "Sleep well, dear friend." Steven arrives at the funny farm to pick up Claudia, who's now sporting ultra short poofy bangs. She tells him she's sooo ready to leave the funny farm, but is grateful to the staff for helping her sort out her various mental incapacities. She's excited to go out into the real world again and exclaims how everything will be "beautiful and great". Steven ferries Claudia over to the La Mirage - since, in the Dynasty universe, it's the only hotel in Denver. They check into her room, where a lovely bouquet of yellow roses (from Fallon) is waiting. Steven tells her it's nice to have her among the sane again, then takes one of the roses from the bouquet, hands it to her, and says, "Welcome to your future, Claudia." She tells him she's happy to be with him in the present - but then he gets a faraway look and says he was just thinking about the past, specifically that episode in Season 1 where they doinked in the cabin. Claudia gets a dreamy look on her face and recalls that she had said, "Make this night last forever", then touches his face while gazing at him longingly...and the two start making out on the bed. He tells her he hasn't touched a woman since Sammy Jo, and Claudia replies, "And I haven't touched a man who mattered since you" and the two start going at it in earnest. OK...so Steven is, uh, straight now?
Alexis arrives at La Mirage in her fancy car. She tells her driver she thinks they were being followed and orders him to keep an eye out for any psycho stalkers. She then sashays over to the tennis court, where Mark is wrapping up a tennis lesson, and asks him if they could have a chat. She admits it was stupid to go to the cabin unprotected when five viable suspects were brazenly threatening her life during the Season 3 finale. She laments being a target for jealous and angry men, but Mark's just like, "Sucks to be you" and starts to walk off. Alexis rushes after him and tells him he's wasting his life being a tennis instructor, then offers him a job as her bodyguard. He sneers and says he wouldn't lift a finger to save her life a second time, then stalks off. A few seconds later, Alexis runs into Fallon and asks her when and where Joseph's funeral service will be held. Fallon tells her that Blake has ordered everyone to not tell her any of the details of the event 'cause she's not welcome to attend. Steven and Claudia are lounging in bed, post coitus. She asks him why he didn't tell her that he and Blake are feuding, and he says he didn't want to ruin her homecoming after she worked so hard at the funny farm to get better. Plus, it should simply be assumed that Blake and Steven are never not feuding over Steven's gay lifestyle...except in this episode, when he suddenly seems to be into women. She lectures him about how Danny needs a grandfather, then starts nattering about the grandmotherly love Lindsay received from Matthew's mother - despite the cunty way she treated Claudia. She insists that the love of a grandparent is very important to a child and urges Steven to make up with Blake so that Danny can know Blake's douchebaggy brand of love. The two cuddle as Steven mulls over her suggestion. The cast (minus Alexis) arrives for Joseph's funeral. As Blake escorts Kirby inside, Jeff ambles over to Krystle and tells her how worried he is about his wife. She won't talk about her father, refuses to eat, and stays locked away in her room all day. He asks Krystle to talk to her and see if she can figure out whassup. In the next scene, Krystle is asking Kirby why she's been acting so squirrelly lately, and Kirby wails, "God is punishing me!" then confesses that she deliberately caused the horseback riding accident. She tears up and says she has to let out her horrific secret before she implodes, and reveals to Krystle that she's pregnant with Adam's baby - and that it's the result of a rape he committed last season. Krystle gasps in pensive shock and asks her if Adam knows...and Kirby starts weeping and says she never wants the sick rapist to know. Krystle, who seems oddly content to gloss over the 'I was raped' part of Kirby's story, advises her to tell Jeff he's not her baby daddy, since he'll probably learn the truth eventually. She asks, "Can you live with this?" and Kirby tearfully shakes her head. Andy advises Blake not to file for custody of Danny 'cause of how dickish it would be for a grandfather to challenge the right of his perfectly capable son to raise his own child. Blake snarls, "I'm challenging my gay son's right to raise his son in an unwholesome, unnatural environment." Andy says this is uncharted territory and that custody cases between parents and grandparents generally degenerate into bitterness. He warns Blake not to jump into this thing - but Blake argues that he's not "jumping into" anything and insists he's being pushed by the anti-gay forces within himself. Andy puts his hand on Blake's shoulder and urges him to reach out to his son before he makes a move, and Blake stares contemplatively into space as he mulls over that possibility.
Blake enters the restaurant in La Mirage and sees Krystle eating breakfast with Claudia. He goes over to say hey - and Claudia thanks him for offering her a job at Denver-Carrington, but politely declines and says she wants to go in a different direction. She gets up and heads off, and Krystle gives Blake another of her nauseatingly serene smiles and says it was soooo nice of him to offer Claudia a job. Blake nods at his generousness and says it took losing a friend like Joseph to realize that "none of us is an island". He recalls that there once was a time he took pride in not needing anyone, but it was a "false pride", and he now knows it was wrong to shut her out. He then spells out where this conversation is leading: he wants her to become his wife again (don't do it!!) and move back into the mansion. Krystle pensively nods and promises to think about it. Adam drops by Fallon's office and informs her that he's moving back to Billings. Hurray! If only. Fallon looks pleased to hear that, mostly 'cause he's inspired icky feelings of mistrust ever since stepping foot in Denver...plus, he brazenly lied about not knowing Dr. Edwards and anything about The Mysterious Case of the Mercuric Oxide he had been involved with while practicing law in Billings. Adam dismissively calls her "the suspicious daughter of a suspicious mother" and needlessly gripes about how Alexis suspected him of torching the cabin. After he stomps out, Fallon immediately gets on the phone to start digging around, searching for companies in Montana that manufacture mercuric oxide. Krystle stops by Steven's apartment to bring a present for Danny - and she's all, "Ack!" when Alexis answers the door. She offers to come by another time, but Alexis invites her in so she can order her to never to darken her son's doorway again. She accuses her of alienating Steven and Fallon from her - but Krystle chuckles and says she doesn't need anyone's help alienating herself from her children. She then reminds Alexis that her special friendship with Steven goes back as far as Season 1, and says that Steven won't tolerate her dictating who his friends should be. At that moment, Steven arrives home and asks whaddup with all the arguing, and Alexis assures him they were just talking...albeit in a loud, hostile manner. The phone then rings, and it's Blake, inviting Steven over to the mansion for another father-son blowout in the study.
Steven arrives at the mansion and enters the study, where things always seem to go very very badly for these two. Blake tells Steven he wants him and Danny to move back into the mansion...and that Chris can live in the apartment alone, or go pee up a rope for all he cares. Steven looks dismayed and glumly states, "So this is really about Chris." Blake says that the mansion would be a wonderful home for Danny, then happily remarks, "Andy was right about reaching out." Steven asks what his lawyer has to do with any of this, then jokingly asks if he plans on taking him to court in order to force him to move back into the mansion. Blake's like, "Well, d'yuh" and Steven moans, "Oh God.." Blake admits he was about to sue him for custody of Danny, but Steven refuses to move back in and tells his father he can't make him. Blake says he doesn't give a rat's ass where he lives and barks, "Just give me Danny" so that Krystle (assuming she's dumb enough to move back in) can raise the tot the way a tot should be raised. Steven tells him he's nuts if he thinks this will bring Krystle back, and Blake ignores that jab and promises to drop any legal action if he cooperates with his edict. Steven shakes his head in disgust and heads toward the door, and Blake growls, "I'm not through with you!" Steven snaps back, "I'm through with you!" and the two start shoving each other like frail kittens. Blake growls, "This isn't the end of it, Steven! I'll see you in court. I'm going to get my grandson!" and Steven glares at him...but also starts to look worried. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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