Recap: Fallon joins Steven in the breakfast room and asks him how things went with Sammy Jo in New York. He mumbles something about how badly it went, and she nods and says she figured that things wouldn't work out with the vapid tart. Steven shoots her the stink-eye and asks, "Are you really sorry?" and Fallon says she is, but knew the marriage was doomed from the beginning - but gets that he had to figure out the obvious for himself. Steven says that from now on he's going to focus on moving forward; however, because he was presumed dead for so long, he has no access to any money. You'd think Blake would have taken care of that by now. He tells Fallon he needs $3,000 so he can hire a divorce lawyer and then get an apartment for himself and Danny. Fallon says she's sad that he's planning to move out, and points out that living at the mansion would be a whole lot easier 'cause there's already a team of servants to look after Danny 24/7. Steven bitchily snaps, "I want a loan, not a lecture!" and starts to storm off, but Fallon stops him and promises she'll get him anything he needs...then jokes about wanting to negotiate a peace treaty between him and Blake. The better option would be to throw in the towel and let them become estranged so that the tedious father-son arguments in the mansion's study can come to a merciful end. In the study, Krystle advises Blake to apologize to Steven for acting like his usual dickwad, homophobic self, but Blake disagrees and grumbles, "There's nothing to apologize for." Krystle reminds him that, during the previous episode, he told Steven that Danny shouldn't be raised by a single father who's unable to set a positive example, and Blake goes, "Well, that's true, isn't it?" and says that Danny deserves the more wholesome kind of influence she could provide. Krystle says that Steven is still Danny's father (we're assuming, anyway) and that it really doesn't matter what his lifestyle choices are. Blake rolls his eyes and says, "You mean his gayness? That is the polite word they're using nowadays for it, isn't it?" [Yes, Blake. It's definitely a good substitute for the language you were using in Season 1.] He starts to storm out, but stops and apologizes to Krystle for snarling at her a few seconds earlier - then explains that he's in a shitty mood 'cause he's stressed about having to attend Alexis' merger meeting.
A group of portly white men are sitting around the Denver-Carrington boardroom, chatting and smoking cigars. Blake enters the room and sarcastically asks the men if they're all in good health, then snappishly says he wasn't able to reach any of them on the phone this morning. Alexis and Adam are on their way to the boardroom when they run into Jeff, who informs them that he's attending the meeting to protect his interests. The three enter the boardroom, and Alexis, who's looking fabulous in a white hat and chic tailored suit, greets Blake and gleefully refers to the occasion as his Abdication Day. Blake snaps, "I haven't abdicated" and Alexis smugly retorts, "Yet." When the meeting officially comes to order, Alexis lays out her edict: the two Denver-based oil giants, ColbyCo and Denver-Carrington, will form a merger "by joining assets and forces". She adds that the interest on Wall Street and around the world is enormous. She then warns the men that she's a very direct [and vindictive] woman and says, "If I don't get your vote, I shall fire you all on the spot and replace you with a board who will approve the merger." They all look suitably freaked out, and when she asks for a show of hands in support of the merger, all of the men fearfully raise their hands...and even Blake gives in and says he'll go along with the majority. Alexis looks delighted and chirps, "Splendid!" then wishes them all a pleasant evening and exits the room with Adam dutifully trotting behind her. Blake glares at the board members and sarcastically thanks them, so Sam Dexter explains that they were merely protecting their interests. Blake starts railing about how Denver-Carrington is his company, and that he learned the oil business when he was a young man, then clawed his way to the top and founded Denver-Carrington, blah blah.. Oh just suck on it, Blake. No one held a gun to your head and forced you to take the company public. Over at Carrington manor, Jeff receives a letter from his alma mater, grins as he reads it, then races up to the nursery. He finds Fallon cuddling Baby Blake and waves his letter in the air and says that their son has officially been registered by his college out east. (Not sure why an infant would need to be registered by a college. Is this an actual thing Americans do?) Fallon says that's great and all, but what will happen if Baby Blake decides he wants to attend Northwestern? The two start reminiscing about some dance they attended when they were teenagers, then relive the past and start dancing together. Kirby suddenly appears in the doorway and witnesses the tender moment, then backs away dejectedly. Krystle enters the sitting room where Kirby is playing Chopin on the piano and looking sad. Krystle sits on the bench next to her and asks whassup about her sadness, so Kirby admits she hates living under the same roof as her husband's ex-wife (and probably isn't thrilled about living in a house where her father is the head servant). Krystle nods sympathetically and says she understands how horribly that sucks, and that she was in a similar situation when Alexis moved into the nearby art studio during Season 2. She assures Kirby that Fallon is no longer part of Jeff's life, other than their shared responsibility parenting Baby Blake, and that she's nowhere near as cunty and intrusive as Alexis.
Blake calls Alexis and tells her that her people have "juggled the figures" on his company so badly that it's practically criminal. He demands a meeting with her, and after some hemming and hawing she agrees to meet with him at her penthouse at 6pm. Blake says he's much rather meet in her office, but she says she likes to relax in the evenings, and he reluctantly agrees. Steven enters the nursery and finds Krystle cuddling Danny on the window seat. She asks him how it's going, and he grumbles that the apartment hunt is lousy 'cause it's hard to find a cheap place that can accommodate a baby. He announces that he'll be staying at the La Mirage until he can find a suitable apartment, then asks Krystle if she'd mind looking after Danny a little while longer. Krystle happily agrees and says she hates what's happening between him and Blake. She reminds him that Alexis' claim that Blake was trying to buy Danny from Sammy Jo was bullshit, and that all he wanted to do was ensure that the tot was well cared for. Steven admits that Blake does have some good qualities and wishes he could love him like she does...but there's just too much pain and douchebaggery where he's concerned and he's given up hope that the wounds can ever heal. Alexis is at her penthouse, eating lunch and trying to call Mark at the La Mirage...but she's told he's busy and can't be reached. Take a damn hint, Alexis. A few seconds later, Morgan Hess arrives to deliver his report on Operation Dig Up Dirt on McVane. Turns out the sleazy politician is messing around with the seventeen year old daughter of some governor. Ick. Alexis reads the report and grins with delight. Hess, meanwhile, ambles over to her balcony, looks down, and notices a big black car with an ominous, burly man standing beside it. He looks jittery and asks Alexis if there's a back exit in the building, then explains that in his line of work he makes a lot of enemies. Alexis, who doesn't seem overly concerned about his safety, breezily directs him to the service elevator. Over at ColbyCo, Adam demands to know from Jeff why he was at the merger meeting (didn't Jeff tell him and Alexis that he was there to protect his interests??). Jeff tells him that Blake called him up and asked for some figures and asked him to attend the meeting. He then picks up some papers and starts waving them around, accusing Adam's ColbyCo flunkies of underestimating Denver-Carrington's oil reserves by 30%. Adam flatly denies that and accuses his head of not being screwed on straight. LOL. He then shoots Jeff a sly grin and says, "Kirby can really get a man going. She is, as they say, one sexy doll." Jeff glares at him in disgust and tells him to stop talking about his wife in such a crude manner, so Adam fake apologizes and says, "I meant to say she is one very sexy woman. I oughta know." Ouch. That sounds a lot worse than the first thing he said. Jeff's all, "Wha-a?!" then grabs Adam with both hands, slams him against the nearest wall, and threatens to kill him if he implies anything unsavory about his wife.
At the La Mirage, Mark is in the hotel's boutique with Fallon, and the two are brazenly flirting while he helps her try on a pair of tennis gloves. Alexis suddenly appears at the store's entrance, and looks startled and dismayed when her ex-gigolo and daughter start smooching. Alexis makes a beeline over to Fallon's office, and is pacing across the floor when Fallon enters. She tells her daughter she's been concerned about her ever since Mark followed her to Haiti to be her "good friend". She says he's a certain type of man, then gives up trying to be diplomatic and blurts out, "He's a male tramp." Fallon says she doesn't believe that, so Alexis assures her it's true...and that she knows this 'cause she had him investigated and learned that after he split with Krystle, he made a career out of living off of wealthy women. (Like her, for example, when she became Mark's sugar momma earlier this season.) Fallon rolls her eyes and goes, "So what?" and refuses to fire Mark. Alexis storms back to her office at ColbyCo and barks at her secretary, David, that she's not to be disturbed. As she fixes herself a drink, Adam bursts in to tell her that he just eavesdropped on something disturbing: apparently, the cronies in Washington D.C. have agreed that they cannot rule on the merger until "all ramifications have been examined", which could take months. Alexis growls, "It's because of McVane...miserable scum" then starts railing about how tired she is of being used by men. She suddenly gets a delicious idea and buzzes David and asks him to connect her with a reporter from The Chronicle. She smiles smugly into space and says she's no stranger to unfeeling men, and that she used to be soft and giving - but no more! Now it's "use or be used". David puts the call through, and Alexis gets on the horn and tells her reporter friend she has a story that's going to make headlines across the country. Steven and Fallon are hanging together at the La Mirage. He thanks her for setting him up with a deluxe suite and giving him access to some much needed funds. He then says he's off to see his lawyer, who's also an old college buddy. Steven's lawyer friend's name is Christopher Deegan - hey, he's the oldest brother from Eight is Enough! - who runs a small law firm. Steven tells him he wants to end his bad marriage, and Chris sympathizes and says he had a bad one too. He agrees to take Steven's case, but says he doubts it'll go smoothly, considering the kind of shameless gold digger Sammy Jo is...and Steven agrees that she'll probably want a big payoff. Regardless, he wants that skank out of his life and acknowledges that she never should have been there in the first place. Chris goes, "I know what you mean" and gives him a not-so-subtle mmm hmm look. Mmm hmm.. Steven drops by ColbyCo to talk to Alexis, but instead finds Adam hanging in her office. Adam says he regrets not hitting it off with him prior to his trip to New York, and that having a kid brother means a lot to him. He tells Steven the sad tale of how he grew up in isolation in Montana with his fake grandmother who never let him do anything...probably 'cause she was so scared that someone would figure out she was a kidnapper. He tells Steven he'd really like to be friends and tries to give him a brotherly hug - but Steven stiffens and snaps, "We're not friends!" Damn he's one prickly little bitch. Alexis enters her office at that moment and asks whassup, so Steven tells her he's accepting her offer to work at ColbyCo, and she gushes about how absolutely thrilled she is - unlike Adam, who's clearly not so thrilled. Alexis scolds Adam (not sure why) and says she doesn't want to see any fighting between them, and Adam gets understandably miffed and storms out. Alexis then turns her attention to Steven and tells him again how happy she is, and that eventually Adam will come around and love him. Adam returns to his office, glumly stares at himself in the mirror, and says, "You tried...still alone." He pulls out a bottle of pills and looks as though he's about to take some of the medication, but then changes his mind and stares contemplatively into space. If they're antipsychotics, he should definitely considering taking a few. Blake is impatiently waiting for Alexis at her penthouse. When she arrives, he snarks that she's a half an hour late and that he wants to go over those papers now. Alexis ignores his grumbling and casually sashays over to the bar, where she pours herself a drink. Blake tells her that her people came up with a phony evaluation of Denver-Carrington's reserves, oil leases, refineries, etc. and Alexis is all, "Wuh?" and looks insulted at the accusation. She announces that she's going upstairs to change...and after she flounces off, an irked Blake calls Krystle and tells her not to hold dinner for him 'cause he has no idea how late he's going to be. He tells her he's at Alexis' penthouse, trying to work through "her creative arithmetic".
Alexis appears on the landing of the staircase dressed in a strapless fuchsia outfit, then puts one hand on her hip and sexily poses for a few seconds. Blake nods approvingly and says, "That's quite a change" and she coos, "It's much more comfortable." Blake holds up his martini and toasts her loveliness, and she thanks him, returns downstairs, and pours herself another drink. She announces that she's ready to discuss business - and Blake suddenly picks up the phone and tells her he's calling Krystle to invite her to join them. What in the hell for? Alexis gets mad at her lost opportunity to...I dunno, flirt with/flash/seduce Blake?? I thought she recently decided she hated him. She snaps, "Forget the meeting! We'll have it tomorrow." Blake scornfully says she'll have to dress in a much more dazzling outfit if she plans on robbing him blind, then smugly informs her that he has McVane and a bunch of other powerful contacts working for him in D.C. He mocks her for being an amateur in this business and snarls, "I've got weapons that will blast you right out of this town!" LOL. Alexis retorts, "We'll see about that" and Blake smirks as he heads out. She responds by dramatically shaking her head from side to side and yelling, "Oh God I hate you!" then hurls a vase at the elevator. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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