Recap: Krystle is pensively staring at herself in the mirror when Blake enters the bedroom. He orders her to tell him the whole sordid story of how she and Mark met, how and why they got married - and to look at him while she's telling it, damn it. (It remains unclear why the decade old story of how Krystle met/fell in love with/married Mark is any of the fuckbag's business.) He also wants to know why she insisted on making her divorce from Mark so personal when she could have just handed the matter over to his lawyers. Well...d'yuh. Krystle calls her divorce from Mark "a private thing" which she would prefer to deal with in her own special way...and she really has no desire to talk about it with him. Joseph interrupts to inform Blake that he has an emergency call from Hong Kong, and Blake mutters that his investigator flunky must have finally located Steven. He heads to the study to take the call, even though there's a phone extension in the bedroom - but maybe the call came through on one of his private lines that can only be accessed in only one room of the mansion. Ah, '80s phone technology. Krystle has a flashback of when she was married to Mark and sported her unflattering Big Valley hairdo. She and Mark are admiring the tiny photo of him that she has inside her locket, and she coos, "Now I'll have you close to my heart whenever I wear it." She tells him she'll miss him, and will join him when he hits it big - so he sheepishly breaks the news that he's not actually on the tennis circuit anymore. Krystle looks unfazed and assures him that someday, somehow he'll become a superstar on the court, and the two gabble about how much they need and love each other and start smooching in earnest. Krystle is suddenly jolted out of her reverie when Blake re-enters the bedroom, looking ashen and discombobulated. Krystle asks him whassup, and he slumps into the nearest chair and tells her there was an explosion in the Java Sea. Five men working aboard an oil rig are missing and presumed dead - Steven among them. Krystle puts on her pensively sympathetic face and tells Blake how sorry she is - and Blake retorts by railing about how he wants answers about the explosion, and that she can shove her sympathy 'cause he won't allow anyone to write Steven off just yet. The next morning, Blake books a first class ticket to Bali. Jeff offers to contact his staff at the Bali division of ColbyCo (LOL) to look into the explosion, but Blake says it's best that he take care of the matter himself. He can't seem to shake the feeling that Steven is alive, calling out for him...and feels closer to his son than ever before. Fallon begs him to take her to Bali with him, but he insists he needs to do this alone. After Blake heads upstairs, Jeff tries to comfort Fallon, but she bitchily shoves him away and runs off. Kirby, who witnessed the snub from across the hall, explains to Jeff that Fallon is in so much pain that it's hard for her to let anyone get close. She starts caressing his cheek, when suddenly Joseph - ack! - appears and glares at them disapprovingly. He brusquely reminds Kirby that she has nannying to do, and she and Jeff scurry off in opposite directions.
Blake finds Krystle packing her suitcase and asks her why the hell she's doing that, and she gives him a funny look and says, "I'm going with you." He growls, "I have to do this alone" and explains that since it's his fault that Steven angrily left Denver at the end of Season 2, he should be the one who searches for him now. Krystle insists that her place is with him and begs him to change his mind, but he snarls, "I don't need anyone to fight my battles!", shoots her the stink-eye, and storms out. Krystle stares after him with a pensively anxious expression on her face. Jeff arrives at the penthouse to break the news about Steven to Alexis...but Adam bitchily tells him she's unavailable. Jeff says he needs to talk to her, like asap, then blurts out that Steven is presumed blown up after the rig he was working on exploded in the Java Sea. Adam cringes, gasps, then exclaims, "Oh my God, Jeff!" and says he should prolly be the one to deliver the bad news to his mum. Jeff doesn't reply and just stares at him blankly. Fallon's in Steven's bedroom, draped across his bed, sobbing. Krystle tiptoes in and asks her if she's OK, and she snaps, "Go away!" Krystle scrunches her face in irritation and says she doesn't get this family, and complains about how the Carringtons have a tendency to deal with tragedy by going off alone like wounded bears. She reminds Fallon that she too loved Steven - and that for a long time, he was her only friend in the mansion. She then offers to help with anything Fallon might need done at the La Mirage, and needlessly informs her that she's heading over there later to clear up some things with Mark. Fallon glares at her and accuses her of planning to hook up with her ex-husband the minute her current husband is out the door (or vice versa, since she's still technically married to Mark). Krystle says she's going to let that cunty remark slide, since she knows how upset she is, then reminds Fallon that the only reason Mark is in her life right now is 'cause she and Alexis worked so hard to put him there. To be fair, that was really more Alexis' doing. Alexis is slumped over the couch as she despondently processes the news about Steven. She moans to Adam, who's tightly cuddling her from behind (OMFG), about how drained and numb she feels, then breathily murmurs, "Thank God I have you." He asks her if it's a wise idea to fly to Bali with Blake, then snidely adds that he feels zero sympathy toward the old goat. Alexis points out that Steven's death is Blake's loss too, then chides Adam for holding grudges at such a sad time. Incidentally, there's something very Bates Motel-ish about this creepy mother-son relationship.
Alexis and Adam arrive at the mansion in search of some familial sympathy. Fallon gives Alexis an obligatory hug, then snarkishly asks Adam what he's doing here. Alexis tut tuts her hostility, and Adam says this isn't the time or the place to try to settle their differences. Alexis and Fallon amble over to the study, where Alexis reminisces about the last time Steven told everyone to go to hell. (Hee! That was an awesome episode.) Alexis then shakes off the disturbing memory and says she needs to pull herself together before she talks to Blake - but Fallon informs her that Blake is already en route to Bali. Alexis silently ponders that nugget as she looks out the window and seems intrigued when she notices Krystle morosely wandering around the pool. She flounces through a set of French doors leading to the backyard and storms over to Krystle. She admonishes her for bringing her trashy family into their lives, and Krystle looks perplexed and reminds her that Sammy Jo is long gone. Alexis insists if she hadn't brought that tart into the mansion, Steven would still be alive. Wait - wuh? Krystle says she's going to ignore that nonsensical accusation 'cause she knows she's mourning for Steven, but Alexis continues to rail about how much she hates Sammy Jo for what she did and hates her (Krystle) for her part in all of it. Krystle reminds her that she's the one who paid Sammy Jo to leave Steven, then says if she'd stayed in the marriage, maybe the two would have been able to make a go of it. Well that's just crazy talk. Alexis scoffs at that and says there was nothing between those two - but Krystle disagrees, so Alexis derisively snaps, "Love?" and Krystle replies, "Yeah...but a fragile, special kind of love." LOL - the kind that can only exist between a sexually confused rich man and a gold-digging opportunist. Krystle extends her sympathies to Alexis for the loss of her son, but reminds her that she feels it too 'cause she also loved Steven. She abruptly storms away, which was unfortunate 'cause I was kinda hoping that Alexis might shove her into the pool and thereby spark another of their legendary cat fights. Over at La Mirage, Mark is giving a tennis lesson to a super cute blonde woman named Barbie, who looks exactly as I would imagine a real life Barbie doll would look like. We get a lot of gratuitously superfluous footage of Barbie jiggling bralessly across the court - until Mark notices that Krystle has arrived and is watching him from the stands. He aims a rough serve in Barbie's direction, and she pauses her jiggling to exclaim, "Darn near took my head off!" Mark apologizes and says they need to wind it down for today, but promises to give her extra time tomorrow - and she's like, "OK!" and happily scampers off. Mark walks over to Krystle and asks her whassup, so she tells him she came to apologize for accusing him of lying about their divorce not being legal. She tells him she went to Mexico to check it out and learned he was telling the truth. She then asks him if they can talk in private, so he invites her to his place...and when she furrows her brows concernedly, he assures her she'll be safe and adds, "I'm not hittin' the moves like in the old days." Well that's a relief.
Krystle tells Mark she's going to file for divorce in Colorado and that the process will take about three months. Mark says she could have just sent a lawyer to inform him of this - no duh - so she says, "I felt it was really my problem." She reminisces about all the wonderful years they spent together as husband and wife and says she didn't want it to end with lawyers and hostility. He wryly thanks her for not throwing in his face all the not so wonderful problems he caused in their marriage, then promises not to do anything to hold up the divorce proceedings. He asks her if they can still be friends, and she gives him one of her vapid smiles and says, "Of course we can" and he perks up and goes, "Do you really mean that?" She assures him she does, shoots him another vapid smile, and exits his apartment...leaving him staring after her longingly. Oh dear. Blake is en route to Bali, and he's in the first class cabin, re-reading the letter that Steven sent to Fallon during the La Mirage episode. Alexis enters the cabin [hey - how'd she get aboard the flight so fast?!], and when a flight attendant half-heartedly tries to prevent her from entering the restricted area, she snarks that there were no first class tickets available on this shitastic airline, and then flounces over to where Blake's sitting. He glares at her and growls, "What the devil are you doing here?" and she snatches the letter, looks it over, and bitches about how no one told her that Steven got in touch with the family. She then rails about how no one also bothered to inform her when her grandson was safely recovered from his kidnapper. Blake snarls that the current Steven Situation has nothing to do with her, and she narrows her eyes at him and wails, "What kind of monster are you?!" and lunges at him with her hands wrapped around his neck. Hahaha!! Awesome! Blake easily shoves her off of him and insists that Steven isn't dead, and she stares back at him with an expression of intrigue while dramatic duhn duhn duhn music abruptly starts playing in the background. LOL. Back at Carrington manor, Fallon is morosely gazing into the swimming pool. She hallucinates that she sees a dead body at the bottom of the pool and starts shrieking and wigging out - and Adam (who, for some reason, is loitering nearby) runs over and asks whassup. She says she was just imagining that Steven's lifeless body was floating near the bottom of the ocean (er...OK?), then apologizes for her bitchitude yesterday. He tells her not to worry about it and that he'd like it if she stopped thinking of him as an intruder on her grief. He says he would have liked to have met Steven, and that it would have been cool to have grown up with siblings [instead of a demented kidnapper]. Fallon says that Steven was very special to her, since he's the only person who really understood her...and Adam says he'd like a chance to be her brother too, but Fallon's like, "I dunno" and says it's too painful for her to ponder at the moment. She mutters, "Maybe in time" and then spacily wanders off. Kirby's walking Baby Blake in his huge baby carriage on the estate when Adam drives by. He stops the car and apologizes for acting like an aggressive psycho at Fallon's party the other night. He admits, "I came on pretty strong. It happens sometimes - especially when I meet a girl who turns me on as much as you do." In other words, the aroused state of his penis is totally Kirby's fault. Kirby looks icked out, the way she generally looks in Adam's presence, and says he needs to apologize for saying that just now - but Adam just chuckles and says she owes him "a sporting chance" to get her in the sack. He invites her out for a night of dinner and dancing, but she gives him a funny look and reminds him he just lost a brother. He shrugs and says that Steven's nothing more than a name to him - whereas she is attractive and, is once again, turning him on. Baby Blake gurgles his disgust, so Adam peeks into the carriage and derisively mutters, "Ahh...the little prince." He then slips his arm around Kirby's waist and pulls her close to him and says he'd like some time with her without the pesky baby hanging around. He breathily adds, "Look forward to it, Kirby. I do." Gross.
Joseph arrives at ColbyCo to speak with Jeff, who's looking sicker and sweatier than ever from the toxic blue paint, about his flirty behavior with Kirby. Jeff looks up at him, bleary-eyed, and goes, "Huh?" so Joseph explains that Kirby has had a huge crush on him since girlhood, and that he'd appreciate it if he (Jeff) wouldn't do anything to encourage her. Jeff looks puzzled, then suddenly becomes so enraged that he starts yelling at Joseph for accusing him of being a rapist. He grabs him by the collar, hauls him to his feet, and bellows, "What evidence do you have?!" and Joseph just stares back at him, unfazed. LOL. Jeff looks like he suddenly realizes now nutty he's acting and promptly releases Joseph. He apologizes and says, "I don't know what came over me" and wonders if the ghost of Cecil is torturing him, since the more time he spends in this office, the worse he feels. Joseph says he's probably just overworked and apologizes for bothering him. Jeff assures him he won't do anything to lead Kirby on, and Joseph thanks him and stiffly exits. Joseph informs Krystle that Frank Dean (Sammy Jo's pa) is at the mansion gate, waiting to see her. Krystle purses her lips pensively, then tells Joseph it's OK to let the deadbeat inside. A few seconds later, Frank ambles into the study and is surprised to learn that his skanky daughter no longer lives in Carrington manor. Krystle explains that she moved out awhile ago...and he sheepishly admits he's a lousy father and that his ex-girlfriend was a bad influence on him where parenting was concerned. He says he wants to do raat by Sammy Jo, and offers his condolences for Steven's untimely death, but Krystle rolls her eyes and accuses him of just wanting to get his hands on Steven's money. Frank denies that and says he isn't leaving until she tells him where Sammy Jo went, but Krystle says she has no idea. Frank snarls that his daughter is bound to come into money from her dead husband's estate - and he's going to ensure that she gets it. Krystle angrily throws him out. Blake has arrived in Bali and is admonishing Cassidy, the investigator (or whoever), for not formulating a plan fast enough to search for survivors of the explosion. Cassidy points at a large map and says the area is just too big...and much of it is open sea. He mentions that the foreman of the rig survived the blast...and Alexis, who's also in the room, perks up and says she'd like to speak with him. Cassidy says she can't 'cause he's at a hospital far away from here, but he'd be happy to fly them both there tomorrow. Blake snaps, "That's not good enough!" and says he needs to fly them there right now, but Cassidy explains that a typhoon is expected to hit the area within the next few hours. Blake bellows, "I don't care!" and orders him to find a suicidal pilot who's willing to fly in a typhoon. Cassidy gives him a look of puzzlement and asks, "Why won't you listen to reason?" - bwahahahahaha! - and Blake snatches up the phone receiver from a nearby desk, thrusts it at him, and barks, "Do it!" and the scene fades to black before Cassidy can tell Blake to go pee up a rope. Over at Carrington manor, Fallon and Krystle are picking at their breakfasts, waiting for Blake to call. When the phone rings, Fallon quickly answers - but is disappointed when it's just Mark calling for Krystle. He asks Krystle to meet him at the La Mirage in an hour to sort out a property settlement issue, and Fallon rolls her eyes in disgust and stalks out of the room. In the next scene, Krystle heads out in her fancy car...and is spotted by Frank, who's been staked out near the mansion in his shitty little car. He follows her...and when they both arrive at the hotel, he gets out of his car, runs toward her and loudly admonishes her for treating him like trash. Mark witnesses the altercation and runs over, pulls Frank away from Krystle, and tosses him across the parking lot. He warns the white trash skank never to put his hands "on this lady again" or he'll fuck him up royally. Krystle, who looks kinda turned on by the sexy rescue, gives Mark a grateful hug. Krystle and Mark sit at an outdoor patio. She asks him what he meant earlier by "property settlement", so he hands her an envelop...and when she opens it she finds the locket she owned when they were married. She coos, "Oh Mark!" and he tells her he pawned it during his alcoholic days, but then bought it back so he'd have something to remember her by. For some reason, Krystle looks touched by that. Blake is in his hotel room in Bali, poring over a map of the area when Cassidy stops by. Blake bitches at him for not getting back to him sooner, and an exasperated Cassidy says, "Anybody ever tell you you're not much fun to deal with?" Blake instantly looks sheepish at being called out on his douchewaddery by a man who's not one of his flunkies, and apologizes for behaving like such an ass. Cassidy says he found him a pilot who's stupid enough to fly during a typhoon, then points at himself. Blake thanks him, and the two agree to meet at 6:00am.
Alexis bursts into Blake's room, complaining about the lack of services at this flea-infested hotel. LOL. Blake snaps at her to go back to the States, but she stops her bitching and says she doesn't want to fight...and that she also wants to believe Steven is still alive. She asks Blake if he'd like to have dinner with her and reminisce about their child - but before Blake can answer, he gets a call from Carrington manor. He gives Fallon a brief update of his conversation with Cassidy and says he's flying out at 6:00am to speak with the injured foreman. He then asks if he can speak to Krystle, but Fallon sullenly tells him that she's at a rendezvous with Mark at the La Mirage. Alexis perks up at Blake's obvious irritation...and when he ends the call, she offers to order some room service, then stares at him hopefully. He glares back at her and sarcastically retorts, "So we can comfort each other?" and Alexis breathily replies, "Yesss." LOL. Blake rails at her for wanting to destroy his marriage and predicts she'll gleefully run to Krystle at her first opportunity and claim that they hit the sheets. Alexis insists she has no desire to doink him, then declares that he'll soon thank her for bringing Mark into their lives. Blake's all, "Wuh? What do you mean by that?" but she suddenly acts all cagey and says she doesn't want to spoil the ending for him. She stares at him smugly and says, "What you thought you had, you never really had at all!" then whirls on her heel and exits the room. LOL. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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