Recap: Blake is sitting up in bed, staring at the 'your wife is sleeping with her shrink' note. Again. He turns out the light, puts his blind man glasses on, and stares moodily into space. When Krystle enters the bedroom, he barks, "Where have you been?!" so she tells him she was in the study reading. She climbs into bed seeming more pensive than usual, so he asks her what's wrong. She complains about the wall that exists between them, and that even though they're close physically (ew), they're miles apart emotionally. He tells her, "Walls can come down" so she wails, "When?! And what will it take?" Blake sighs and admits how crazy he's been driven over "the Rhinewood thing" and tells her he lies awake nights thinking about ways of tracking down the elusive mobster and forcing him to answer for ordering the attack that blinded him. He tells Krystle he doesn't want to subject her to all of that anger and angst, and she argues that she wants to share the good and the bad and be a real wife to him...but he has to meet her halfway and start acting like a real husband to her - as opposed to the dickish tyrant he's been behaving like up until now.
The next morning, a large package from The Fur Store arrives at the mansion. Joseph signs for it and brings it to the study, where Krystle is doing some more reading. He asks her if she recently ordered a new fur, and she scrunches her face in confusion and says no. She opens the box and pulls out a long black mink coat and notices the initials SJC embroidered on the inside. She presses her lips together in disapproval and asks Joseph to summon Sammy Jo to the study, like pronto.
Steven and Fallon are in the mansion's workout room, doing stretching exercises together. Steven gives her breathing tips, and the two collapse on the mat, giggling. Steven suddenly looks sad and forlorn, so Fallon asks him whassup, and he tells her that things aren't working out and that he hates living at the mansion. Fallon says that's an awful thing to say, but he argues that his perpetual sadness has a negative effect on everyone else in the mansion, so he just wants to pack it in and leave with his wife by the end of the month. Fallon hugs him and assures him that everyone loves him to bits, but he continues to look miserable and asks, "What about Sammy Jo? The love should include her too." Fallon stares blankly at her clueless brother for a few seconds, then says, "OK, if that's what it takes to make you happy, you've got it" and promises to do her best to get to know the nitwit.
Sammy Jo enters the study, and Krystle sternly asks her whassup with buying an expensive mink coat. Sammy Jo looks delighted that her purchase has arrived and cuddles the furry garment, then drapes it around her shoulders. Krystle asks her if she charged the coat to Steven, and Sammy Jo's like, "Duh...he's my husband." Krystle points out that Steven doesn't have that kind of money, and Sammy Jo rolls her eyes derisively and says, "I've heard." Krystle asks her who she thought was going to pay for the coat, then snaps, "Blake?" and Sammy Jo just kind of nods. Krystle barks, "Well, he's not!" and yanks the fur off of her niece's shoulders and tells her she's sending it back, monogram and all. (I highly doubt The Fur Store will give a full refund now that it's been customized.) Krystle tells Sammy Jo that this sort of thing can't happen again, then says if there's something she needs, she has to run it by her first. Sammy Jo smirks cheekily, and Krystle looks exasperated and snarks, "What's going on in that mind of yours?!" Sammy Jo snidely tells her she'll have to figure it out sometime, then adds, "Like when you're wandering around in the middle of the night - instead of in bed, with your husband." (?? Not sure what Krystle's bedtime habits have to do with her overspending on a mink.) Sammy Jo gives her a smug stare, then flounces out of the room, and Krystle stares after her, looking pensively stricken. Sammy Jo, who's now vexed, charges up the stairs to find Steven - and when he's not in their room, she goes into Fallon's room to see if he's there. She finds the room empty, so she snoops around and spots a jewelry box, then rifles through it and pulls out a pretty necklace and decides to "borrow" it.
Fallon tells Alexis she'd like to throw a party to celebrate Steven's new marriage, and Alexis gives her a funny look and says, "You must be joking" then refers to her daughter-in-law as "that little tramp". Fallon points out that at least Steven hooked up with a female, and Alexis mulls that over for a few seconds and says, "Sometimes I think it might have been better had Steven gone on living the gay life. At least that would have been more honest." Yeah - no fucking duh. Fallon just kind of shrugs and says that since Steven has deluded himself into thinking he's in love with Sammy Jo, they should do all they can to support his life as a heterosexual married man...but Alexis shudders and mutters, "That awful girl." LOL. Fallon insists on throwing Steven a party, then explains that she's soo happy about her relationship with Nick and wants to spread the happiness around. She gleefully reports that Nick assured her that he no longer loves Krystle [now that she's dumped him] and that he's committed to being with her [and settling for sloppy seconds]. Alexis smugly reminds her idiot daughter that her happiness is all due to the anonymous 'your wife is sleeping with her shrink' note they sent to Blake, and that it's proof that the end always justify the means. Alexis then does a sudden 180 and decides that she now likes the idea of celebrating Steven's ill-fated marriage with a big society party.
In Blake's Denver-Carrington office, Fallon fixes her father a martini and gabbles about the party. She says she knows he doesn't really approve of Sammy Jo, but that she'd still like his permission to host the party at Carrington manor. Blake just kind of shrugs and is like, "Whatever" and Fallon squeals happily and gives him a thank you hug. She then tells him how grateful she is that he and Alexis were once close enough to hit the sheets and conceive her, and Blake furrows his brows and falls mute. Fallon asks him if he's angry with her, but he assures her he's not and explains that he's just frustrated because of his fake blindness. He then reminds her to invite Nick Toscanni to the party, since he saved Steven's life after he drunkenly fell in the pool during the Fallon's Father episode, and Fallon grins knowingly and chirps, "Sure!" She gives Blake a goodbye kiss before flouncing out...and once he's alone in his office, he removes his blind man glasses and stares at the 'your wife is sleeping with her shrink' note for the hundredth time and stares pensively into space.
Alexis is in one of the sitting rooms at the mansion, going over logistics for the party with an event planner when Krystle bursts in. She asks the party planner to excuse them, then snarkishly asks Alexis what she thinks she's doing. Alexis lights up a cigarette, takes a few puffs, and says she's helping plan Steven's marriage celebration party...and Krystle's all, "Wuh?" 'cause I guess no one thought to fill her in about the blessed event. Alexis explains that she's pitching in to help her poor pregnant daughter and figured that she (Krystle) would also want to pitch in...but Krystle makes a face and says she has absolutely no interest in helping out with the stupid party. Alexis raises her brows and threatens to tattle to Blake about her lack of enthusiasm about the family event, and Krystle gets all in her face and tells her to go tell Blake whatever the hell she wants. She then declares war, vows to keep fighting her, and storms out of the room. Alexis continues to puff on her cigarette and smiles to herself, amused by how easily and frequently she's able to get under Krystle's skin.
Cecil drops by Blake's office at Denver-Carrington to bitch at him again for offering to adopt Jeff. Blake tells him it's one of the best ideas he's ever had (LOL - seriously?) but Cecil tells him it's a bad, bad idea. I think it's a dumb idea. Why would a grown man want to adopt another grown man? And conversely, why would a grown man want to be adopted by another grown man - especially when the "father" is a giant dickwad like Blake, who's also the grown man's father-in-law? The mind boggles. Cecil accuses Blake of stealing Jeff from ColbyCo and trying to corrupt him by egging him on to give up his birthright, and the two bicker about that for awhile, blah blah. Blake points out that it was Jeff's decision to jump ship and work at Denver-Carrington - just like the adoption will be his decision. He smugly tells Cecil he can provide Jeff with a father image he can respect, and Cecil snidely reminds him that he's a convicted murderer. Bwahaha!! That was a fun zinger, and such a valid point. Blake gets all prickly that he would dare bring up the demise of poor, forgotten Ted Dinard - and Cecil snarls that if he had one wish, it would be that he (Blake) could see again...then growls, "So I could face him eyeball to eyeball and beat the hell out of him!" I guess even Cecil would feel too much like a shithead if he physically assaulted a blind man.
Fallon drops by Sammy Jo's room for some faux friendly chit-chat. She asks her if Steven told her about the party she's throwing for the two of them on Saturday night, and Sammy Jo says he has not...and it doesn't look as though she's terribly thrilled about it either. Fallon explains that she's throwing the party to welcome her to the family and show her off to their friends, but Sammy Jo shoots her the stink-eye and asks, "Are you sure you don't mean 'show me up'?" and then accuses Fallon of treating her like a dimwitted child...which, well d'yuh. Fallon admits that she's throwing the party 'cause she loves her brother, then breezily tells her sister-in-law that she's on the guest list and doesn't need to bother RSVPing. Sammy Jo scrunches her face in confusion and asks her what RSVP means, and Fallon can't bring herself to explain to the dimwit what the acronym means and says she just made it up. It must be a startling confidence booster for Fallon to know that she's no longer the dumbest dumbass living in Carrington manor.
Cecil is waiting for Alexis in her studio...and when she arrives home, she looks thrilled to see him. He tells her he needs her help, and reminds her that she owes him one for encouraging Steven to reconcile with Blake. The favor: he wants her help convincing Jeff to turn down Blake's adoption offer. He shrewdly points out that if Jeff legally becomes a Carrington, Fallon and Steven would have to split their inheritance with him...and Alexis tells him she's already thought about that, but doesn't think Jeff would allow Blake to "swallow his identity". She then shifts gears and starts gushing over how "outrageously attractive" Cecil is looking these days (um...OK?) and tries to get him to lighten up by reminiscing about the days of yore - like, when they used to doink a lot. Cecil looks contemplative, then suddenly gets aroused and starts smooching Alexis...and soon their smooching becomes very intense.
Nick has a second job interview with Tom, the hospital administrator. Tom is curious about Nick's Vietnam service record, and accuses him of using a hand injury as an excuse to avoid performing any surgeries. Nick hotly denies it and says he simply prefers psychiatry, then asks him if he's hired or what. Tom says that what he really needs is a neurosurgeon, but since the hospital currently has an overall doctor shortage, he's in. Ho hum.
Alexis and Cecil enjoy a post-coital canoodle on Alexis' day bed. Cecil tells her he has to get back to work and starts getting dressed...and as he's buttoning up, he follows up on what she once told him about Fallon maybe being his daughter, then asks her if she was putting him on. Alexis just shrugs and tells him not to worry his pretty little head about the past, especially since the present is so fabulous...and somehow Cecil looks satisfied with that response, and the two start smooching again.
A small army of servants is setting up for the big party at Carrington manor. Upstairs, Sammy Jo is sipping champagne and standing in front of a mirror, staring unhappily at herself in a horrifyingly frilly pink Little Bo Peep concoction. Steven primps in his tuxedo and tells her she looks very nice, but warns her to take it easy with the champagne. She tells him she's only had a couple of drinks, then explains that she's nervous about attending her first big rich people party.
Krystle asks Blake if he needs help getting dressed, but he tells her he can manage on his own. She caustically wonders if he plans on spending the entire evening on Joseph's arm, but Blake says no and promises to stand next to her as they greet their guests. He then tells her that after they're done with all the greeting, she's free to go off and mingle with whomever she wants.
Fallon's searching through her jewelry box, looking for the necklace Sammy Jo stole. Jeff enters her room to retrieve a pair of cuff links, so she asks him if he's seen it, and he says he hasn't. She tells him she's grateful to him for telling Blake that their marriage is a sham and praises him for being a nice person who deserves a woman who loves him...or at least likes him a tiny bit. Jeff scoffs at her uncharacteristic kindness and says she's only in a good mood because of her new fella. He asks her if she's planning on marrying the mystery man, and she breezily retorts that marriage isn't very important to her right now. Well, d'yuh - especially when she hasn't even begun divorce proceedings with him yet, or given birth to their child. Jeff chuckles and says it's obvious that her new boyfriend hasn't asked her to be his wife...and Fallon pretends that it doesn't bother her in the least and tells Jeff she refuses to allow him to spoil her evening. She declares that she loves her new guy, her new guy loves her, and that's all that matters. So there.
Tom calls Nick and informs him that they have a code blue emergency at the hospital. Egads! Nick reminds him he wasn't hired as a surgeon, but Tom tells him that the emergency is so dire they need all hands on deck. Nick mulls that over and tells Tom he's on his way.
Guests begin to arrive at Carrington manor, and Joseph steers them over to Blake's/Krystle's receiving line, which looks about a mile long. LOL. Fallon greets Steven and gushes about how great he looks and says she hopes he enjoys his party. She then starts blathering about being a Carrington...and Steven suddenly looks wigged out because of Blake's questionable paternity, so she asks him whassup with that...and he makes up a joke about how he recently discovered that a Pennsylvania Carrington several generations ago was caught shoplifting. Meanwhile, Alexis and Cecil make a grand entrance, and Fallon spots them and runs right over to Blake to report their togetherness. She then makes a beeline over to her mother and asks her why in the hell she brought Cecil, and Alexis tut tuts her about nursing grudges and encourages her to enjoy the evening. Alexis then goes over to Blake and comes clean about bringing Cecil to the party as her date. He snaps, "Why?!" so she tells him she just assumed he'd want everyone in attendance at the party so they can admire his generosity of spirit. She reminds him that his grandchild will have Colby blood in him, and Blake thinks that over and decides that Cecil can stay.
Claudia arrives, looking fresh and fancy in a strapless purple number. She greets Steven and congratulates him on his quickie wedding.
Fallon complains to Krystle that the party has been in full swing for an hour - but she hasn't seen Sammy Jo. She asks Krystle to go upstairs and see whassup...but before Krystle has a chance to ascend the stairs, Sammy Jo appears on the upper landing, looking fantastic in a slinky white, thigh baring gown. Yowza! It's a definite improvement over the frilly pink mess she had on earlier. Krystle looks at her disapprovingly and asks her why she's not wearing the gown they had picked out together, and Sammy Jo petulantly says she decided she didn't like it - scratch that - she hated it and much prefers this slinky number, which she purchased on her own. Incidentally, she's also wearing the sparkly necklace she stole from Fallon earlier. She flounces past Krystle and Fallon...and Fallon notices that she's wearing her missing necklace and is all, "The fuck?!"
Cecil tells Claudia he developed the photos she took of the Denver-Carrington documents, but the material he hoped for wasn't there. She just kind of shrugs and goes, "Oh well, I tried my best" - LOL - and he snarks, "Try harder." She tells him that the files he wants are in a locked cabinet in the file room, and he tells her to find a way to copy them and to do it discreetly. He then glares at her and adds, "If you're anxious to know where your daughter is." Cecil's certainly turning into quite the manipulative douchenozzle.
Nick arrives at Carrington manor, and Fallon rushes over to greet him, then steers him into the study. He's all giddy 'cause he just assisted in an emergency surgery and describes the experience like "coming home after being lost". Fallon pouts and unconvincingly says, "I'm happy for you" and he asks her whassup with her lacklustre reaction, so she tells him about how Jeff was teasing her about the new man in her life not wanting to marry her. Nick ignores her angst and tells her again how jazzed he is about being a surgeon, and warns her that it's probably going to be all consuming for him. He tells her she'll have to be patient, but assures her he wants her. She asks him if he loves her, and he carefully replies, "Oh babe. You're the only woman in my life." So...um, no. The two start smooching just as Jeff walks in...and he shoots Nick the stink-eye and snarks at Fallon that he would never have guessed she was tapping that. After he storms out of the room, Fallon shakes off the unpleasant encounter and tells Nick they should get out there and enjoy the party...and that she loves him and doesn't care who knows it. Once they exit the room, we see that Krystle has been sitting in an oversize chair in the study the entire time, eavesdropping on the conversation and looking pensively sad...even though she has absolutely no reason to look sad, since it was her decision to end the flirtation.
A tipsy Sammy Jo claims an area of the party room as a makeshift dance floor, then abruptly starts swaying and awkwardly jiggling to the muzak the live band is playing - OMFG - and the guests appear amused by the spectacle of the sexy but rhythm-less woman flashing her thighs. Alexis notices her daughter-in-law's "dancing", looks peeved, and marches over to put a stop to it. She grabs her by the arm and snarls, "Act like a lady - as impossible as that may seem" and reminds the shameless little tart that this party was thrown to honor her son, not embarrass her publicly. Sammy Jo looks sheepish...but not so sheepish that she stops jiggling altogether, 'cause she continues to bob her head and lightly twist her torso to the muzak. LOL. Elsewhere, Jeff heads outside to the patio, and Claudia notices his exit from the party and follows him outside. She asks him if he's bored, and he's like, "Well, d'yuh" and invites her to join him for a drink at the St. Dennis club. Claudia accepts.
Blake secretly watches Nick as he tries to chat it up with Krystle, but she stalks away from him with an unmistakable look of disgust on her face...then heads out to the patio to stare pensively in the dark. Nick follows her and tells her he's still not over her...and Blake sneaks outside and hides in the bushes so he can eavesdrop on the two of them. Nick gushes at Krystle about how she's still the most beautiful, desirable woman he's ever met, and she snarks back that he's a liar. She loudly exclaims, "Thank God I never let you touch me" and Blake visibly perks up. LOL. She tells Nick how relieved she is that she remained faithful to her husband, since she really does love the old goat, then sashays back toward the mansion. She suddenly whirls around and bitchily refers to Fallon as Nick's "new victim" and says that even though the woman's a cunty tool, she's very vulnerable...so he'd better not destroy her. Nick stares into space as he mulls that over...and behind the bushes, Blake removes his dark glasses and smiles to himself.
Sammy Jo flounces around the mansion and flirtatiously greets the more attractive of the male guests. Fallon grabs her by the arm, tells her they need to talk, then pulls her into the study. She accuses her of stealing her necklace, and Sammy Jo giggles and says she only borrowed it...then slips into baby talk mode and whines about how nobody at Carrington manor ever gives her anything. Fallon glares at her and tells her she's her brother's biggest mistake, and that she could try changing that by a being a decent human being and live up to what being a Carrington really means. [That's seriously funny, considering the family's general dysfunction.] Sammy Jo starts cackling and tells Fallon how funny it is, the way she's "high and mightying" her, then says, "I may only be a Carrington by marriage, but you're not even one by birth." Fallon's eyes widen and she's all, "Wuh?!" so Sammy Jo drunkenly reveals that Steven told her all about how Blake isn't her real father, and that it makes her a...what's the word: oh yeah, bastard. Sammy Jo starts giggling maniacally, and Fallon tells her she's a miserable liar...but she just shrugs and tells her to ask her mother if she doesn't believe her.
Krystle is lounging in the master bedroom, looking drained. Blake enters the room without his blind man glasses on and asks her if she's OK. She tells him she's tired and has a headache, and he acknowledges that he's probably the cause of the headache...and suddenly she stares at him in shock and realizes that he can see. He grins at her and says he got his sight back a little while ago and rushed upstairs to tell her personally. Krystle totally buys his bullcack and tears up...and he tells her to stop crying 'cause he wants her to celebrate this happy development. He then promises to do his very best not to be such a monumental dinkwhistle anymore, and the two hug.
Fallon's in the study, weeping, when Joseph enters. He assumes she overcome with emotion because of Blake regaining his sight, but she's all, "Whatever" and asks him where Alexis is...and he says she's out in the main hall. Fallon rushes out of the study, finds Alexis, and demands that they go somewhere private to talk. In the next scene, we see that the two are in Fallon's ridiculous Clenet car - and Fallon's behind the wheel, driving erratically. Alexis begs her to slow down, and Fallon snarks, "Is Blake my father or not?!" Alexis is like, "I dunno...it could be him...or Cecil." The car roars past a "roadwork" sign, and Fallon crashes it into a big pile of dirt. LOL. After the impact, she's slumped over in the driver's seat and looks very dead. Alexis frantically tries to wake her by violently shaking her (prolly not such a good idea), but when Fallon remains lifeless, Alexis gets out of the car and runs down the dirt road, yelling, "Help!"
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