Recap: Carrie arrives home, shell-shocked upon learning that her building is going co-op. When she informs Aidan of this disturbing development, he asks her why she doesn't just buy her place...so she has to point out the obvious: whatever meagre salary she's been earning as a raunch columnist for a tabloid rag has been stupidly blown on fugly designer-wear and stilettos, precluding her from ever being in a position to purchase real estate. Aidan says that he's in a position to buy her apartment, then suggests they also buy the place next door and create one giant apartment they can comfortably co-habitate in. He's mad as a hatter, this man. Carrie asks him if this would make him her landlord or her roommate, and he says, "A little of both" and gives her a smooch. He urges her to give it some serious thought, and she then voice-overs that the idea of sponging off of her financially responsible boyfriend made total sense, not least 'cause they were in love and spent every night together anyway.
Trey is injecting hormones into Charlotte's ass cheek while muttering his disapproval of in vitro and his preference for making a baby the old fashioned way. Charlotte reminds him that there's only a slim chance she can get pregnant by relying solely on bumping uglies, then tells him she's been talking to various women in the building about their experiences in trying to get pregnant with in vitro. One of them, Peggy Woodruff, has invited them over on Friday night to delve deeper into the issue. Trey looks annoyed by all the blabbing she's been doing about their barrenness and reminds her that on Friday they'll be attending the Scottish Highland Fling, an important family tradition. Charlotte's like, "OK, whatever" then excitedly tells him she put their names on a waiting list for a Mandarin baby, just in case their babymaking efforts go completely bust.
As Aidan showers, Carrie picks up all the clothes he's left laying around and stuffs them in his duffle bag. She then starts snooping through the bag and discovers a ring box...and opens it, stares in horror at the pear-shaped diamond ring inside, then runs over to the kitchen to vomit in the sink. Ick.
Carrie tells the gigolas about her discovery during the next brunch summit, and Charlotte excitedly gushes, "You're getting engaged!" When Carrie reminds her that she thew up, Samantha contorts her face and says that blowing chunks is her reaction to marriage as well. Charlotte urges Carrie to say yes, but Carrie says she doesn't think that she and Aidan have been together long enough. Charlotte reminds her that she and Trey got engaged after only a month - and she says this as if getting married to a drip like Trey wasn't a completely fucking crazy thing to rush into - and Samantha cheekily points out that they were separated five minutes after the honeymoon. Carrie wonders if Aidan was prompted to propose 'cause her building is going co-op, then cries, "Am I a real estate bride?" When Charlotte asks for details about the ring, Carrie makes a blech face and describes the pear-shaped abomination which, in no way, reflects her shittastic sense of style. As Samantha and Charlotte gasp in collective horror at the notion of pear-shaped jewelry, a hurt looking Miranda tells them that she helped Aidan pick out the ring 'cause he wanted a female perspective. LOL...awkward. Carrie decides that while she's not ready to be engaged, she's totes OK with her and Aidan living together. She then scrunches her face in irritation and moans about how he somehow should know that the pear-shaped monstrosity he's about to pass off as an engagement ring would be all wrong...and Samantha concurs with that self-centered madness and snarks, "Wrong ring, wrong guy."
Carrie is tapping out her weekly raunch while racking her tiny brain to sort out how one can tell when a relationship is right. Does being comfortable suggest a lack of fireworks? Is being hesitant to commit a red flag? As she subtly shakes her head in that funny looking way she does whenever she's all absorbed in getting to the crux of whatever issue she's wrestling with during the episode, she taps out: in matters of love, how do you know when it's right?
Samantha arrives for her meeting with Richard Wright, who grumbles that she's seven minutes late. She barks back that it took her several minutes to navigate through his labyrinth of a lobby, then gets a bitch-slapping by Richard about how the press coverage of his London hotel got knocked off the front page of a travel magazine (or some such thing). He snidely asks her if she looked into it or spent the morning accessorizing...so Samantha snarks back that she pulled two of their ads from the travel editor, got a full page feature on his Barcelona property, and an assurance that this kind of contrived PR disaster won't happen again. Richard looks impressed and says he loves that his cunty 'tude doesn't make her quake in her boots. When he asks her why she looks so glum, she tells him that her BFF is probably getting engaged, then rhetorically asks why everyone always has to get married and have kids. Richard's like, "I dunno, I love sleeping around" and says he enjoys taking exotic trips at a moment's notice and bedding whichever woman happens to catch his eye that day. It's interesting that this is the same man who initially refused to hire Samantha because of her promiscuous reputation. He contorts his face all seductive-like and asks, "Who needs a wife when you have a life?" and Samantha visibly perks up and coos, "That's all I'm sayin'."
Miranda and Steve are getting ice cream in the park when she blurts out that she's pregnant and he's the baby daddy. As a discombobulated Steve tries to get his brain around that life-changing news, Miranda tells him she's going to take full responsibility for the baby's care and expenses and that he can pop by for visits whenever he wants to.
Carrie takes Aidan out for dinner to formally accept his proposal for them to live together. Aidan beams and tells her that that makes him very happy, then says there's something else he'd like to ask her - but Carrie abruptly excuses herself and rushes off to the bathroom. She stares at her horsey face in the bathroom mirror and snarks, "What are you doing??", prompting the person who's in one of the stalls to ask, "Uh, are you talking to me?" Carrie apologizes for talking to herself out loud, flees the bathroom red-faced, and heads back to the table. Aidan once again starts fishing something out of his jacket pocket...and as Carrie stares at him with a mixture of dread and fascination, the thing he ends up pulling out of his pocket is his wallet so he can pay for their dinner. Haha!
Trey arrives home and finds Charlotte attempting to learn Mandarin with the aid of a spoken language tape. When he asks her whassup with the language learning, she explains that it's usually unwanted Chinese girls that come up for adoption, and that they're often a bit older and therefore don't speak English. Trey grimaces and says he no longer feels like going to the Scottish Highland Fling - but Charlotte suddenly gets all squirrelly and shriekishly goes on and on about how they can't let their reproductive problems turn them into hermits. He gives her a funny look and wryly suggests they cut back on the hormones he's been injecting into her ass cheeks.
Carrie has just spent an afternoon shopping in an ultra tight blue and red dress and is unsuccessfully trying to hail a cab - and I really can't help but wonder why none of the SATC women ever try to get around Manhattan by subway: a far cheaper, faster, and more convenient way to scoot around traffic-clogged Manhattan. Mr. Big just happens to ride by in his town car and sticks his head out the window with his usual shit eating grin - ugh - and Carrie sashays over to his car so that the two can exchange their usual cringetastic repartee before he invites her to climb in. Big asks her how things are going with "Country Bob" ... and when she reminds him that he and her boyfriend agreed to put an end to their man feud during the Belles of the Balls episode, Big sheepishly refers to him as Aidan. She says that things are very good with him and that she's pretty sure he's about to propose. Big waves a dismissive hand in the air and pronounces that he's not the guy for her, and also that she's not the marrying kind. Or the decent, faithful kind.
Carrie rifles through Aidan's duffle bag again and is puzzled when the ring is no longer there. She immediately gets on the horn with Miranda to see if she knows whassup - but Miranda says she's no longer involved, then rushes over to the bathroom to throw up. She wearily explains that her morning sickness sickens her all day long.
Charlotte and Trey arrive late for the Scottish Highland Fling...and after they rush into the fancy venue, Bunny greets them and urges Trey to join his brothers on the dance floor. She then tells Charlotte about the proud lineage of the McDougal clan, one she hopes that she and Trey will one day perpetuate, then narrows her beady little eyes and haughtily remarks on her dislike for Mandarin food and unwanted Mandarin babies. Charlotte stares back at her, aghast 'cause somehow she wasn't expecting Bunny to be a racist snob, and tells her it's none of her business - but Bunny argues that it is, and that the family name can only be carried on by her sons and "not daughters of the South Pacific". An enraged Charlotte storms over to Trey to admonish him for blabbing to Bunny about their Mandarin baby backup plan, then complains that she's the one who's been doing all the heavy lifting in order to get pregnant. Trey tries to minimize the spectacle she's making in front of the Scottish Highland Society and grabs at her and tells her to get a hold of herself, which results in him accidentally ripping a huge hole in her dress as she tries to storm off.
Samantha and Richard Wright are getting it on while waiting for take-off on his private jet. The pilot interrupts their dry humping to inform them that the plane has been cleared and that they need to buckle up...and Richard's like, "Yeah whatever" and continues to dry hump Samantha while she loudly moans in faux orgasmic pleasure.
Trey is visibly upset while he gets ready for bed, and snarls in irritation at Charlotte when she asks him to give her her nightly hormone shot. He apologizes for involving Bunny in their babymaking travails, then grumbles, "How much work is a marriage supposed to be?" When Charlotte suggests that this brand of hell is what a relationship is, he retorts, "No, this is what our relationship is" and pouts about how he didn't see any other husband getting screamed at on the dance floor tonight. He says he doesn't want to do this anymore...this meaning desperately trying to create a spawn. He wants to just "be" for awhile, and says he's actually quite fine with never having kids. He acknowledges that he doesn't think she could ever be fine with that...and she's like, "No duh", then tearfully wanders off to the kitchen to get some juice.
Aidan has coaxed Carrie out of the apartment to take an evening walk for Pete's nightly constitutional...and she moans and bitches about having to leave the bed, and gets even more snarly when Aidan searches his pockets for a poop bag. He asks her to hold something...and when she holds out her hand and mutters, "This just gets better and better", Aidan places a ring box in it and stares at her expectantly. She looks down at the ring box with fascination and horror, and Aidan earnestly urges her to open it. She does, and is startled to find a ring that I'll assume she considers stylish and elegant: a large, square-shaped diamond (and not that pear-shaped atrocity that he and Miranda had picked out earlier). Carrie gasps and murmurs, "OMG, it's not..." then stops herself from outing her earlier snooping and just gushes about what a beautiful ring it is. Aidan tells her he loves her and wants to share his life with her (God help this poor sod), and she mulls that over and gives him a yes. (But then finds a way to weasel out of the proposal three episodes from now.)
Miranda gets a visit from Steve on bended knee. He proposes and presents her with the pear-shaped ring, and Miranda snaps, "What are you, fucking crazy?" Steve reminds her that they're having a baby together and that he really wants to be involved in the child's life - but concedes that, nope, he's definitely not in love with her at the moment. Miranda tells him to keep remembering that and assures him that they'll figure out a workable co-parenting plan. She then snarks that she knows the pear-shaped eyesore is a hand-me-down ring...and Steve's like, "Good! I can't afford it anyway."
Carrie meets up with Samantha in a bar to break the news of her engagement. Samantha snarls, "Fuck you", then tells Carrie she was behind the selection of ring #2 and says if she's going to ruin their lives by taking a husband, she at least wants a nice piece of jewelry to look at. The two cackle happily at the loveliness of the giant square-shaped diamond ring (which frankly seems just as adequate as the pear-shaped ring - but then I'm a recapper, not a jeweller) and order a round of drinks.
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