Recap: Pam is in the fugly nursery, fussing over Christopher and continuing to falsely assume that Bobby brought him home as their newly adopted son. Miss Ellie asks Pam why she checked herself out of Brooktree earlier than Dr. Conrad advised, so she says she really didn't think she needed anymore therapy...which ended up being a wise decision, 'cause of how the timing of her homecoming coincided with her new baby's arrival to create a wonderful miracle. Miss Ellie concurs and asks Bobby how he was able to pull off the adoption so unexpectedly quickly, and Bobby just kind of shrugs while mumbling, "I guess they just cut through some red tape, Mama. I dunno." LOL. Pam asks him which adoption agency ended up coming through for them, and he tells her he can't reveal that 'cause it's confidential...and before Pam can chew on that nonsensical reply, JR pokes his head into the room to see whassup. Miss Ellie sternly tells him that they have some unfinished business to discuss...and after she leaves the room, a glowing Pam gushes to Bobby, "It's what we've always wanted: a baby of our own." As JR fixes himself a drink, Miss Ellie demands an explanation for the depleted Ewing Oil cash reserves...and he breezily tells her to calm down (!) and assures her he knows what he's doing. Dissatisfied with that condescending non-response, Miss Ellie tells him that in Jock's absence she made it a point to stay out of the family business - but now realizes it was a major error of judgement, given that he's responsible for Ewing Oil losing a small fortune. She asks him why in blazes he would secure such an enormous loan with Ewing assets, so he explains that he bought up all the oil that would have been allocated to Clayton Farlow and then hoarded it so he could use it as leverage in his quest to have Sue Ellen thrown off of Southern Cross so she'd return to Southfork with John Ross. Miss Ellie reminds him that she made it abundantly clear she didn't want Sue Ellen to return to the ranch upon threat of eviction from Southern Cross and says that no way in hell would Jock approve of his methods. JR stubbornly says he'll do anything to get his son back - but Ellie counters, "Not this time. From now on, until your daddy gets back, your days of free rein at Ewing Oil are over" ... and as she storms out of the room, an unsettled looking JR stares after her worriedly. JR picks up the phone and attempts to call Jock - but can't locate him in whatever South American jungle he's purportedly traipsing through as he scours the land for oil. Sue Ellen is all packed up and ready to leave the Southern Cross ranch for her temporary new home in a San Angelo hotel suite. She thanks Clayton for his hospitality, and he thanks her and John Ross for bringing back some life back into his house, then laments that her flaccid coupling attempt with Dusty didn't work out as planned. He tells her to call if there's anything he can ever do for her, and she warmly bids him adieu. JR is on the phone once again, trying to get through to Jock, but still can't reach him. Pam is feeding Christopher his breakfast when Miss Ellie enters the kitchen and announces that she's off to San Angelo. Pam asks her to pass along her best wishes to Sue Ellen, then prattles about how utterly thrilled she is to be caring for her new baby. A defeated looking Ray tells Walter Sherr that since he's unwilling to borrow any money (from Donna or Miss Ellie) for the San Antonio development, he has no choice but to pronounce the deal officially dead. A bummed Walter says they'll need to look for a buyer to take the soil-challenged land off their hands, then says he knows a fellow named Scotty Singer who might be interested. Mitch is doing his hospital rounds when he enters a room occupied by a pretty, middle-aged woman named Evelyn Michaelson who's simultaneously getting a facelift and a divorce from her husband. She asks Mitch if she's making a mistake by going under the knife, and he assures her that Dr. Waring is an amazing physician, and that she'll be in very capable hands while she's on the operating table. Over at Southern Cross, Miss Ellie tells Clayton she'd like to resolve the clusterfuck that JR dragged them into when he hoarded a massive amount of oil in an attempt to regain custody of John Ross. She proposes selling the oil back to him...and when he agrees and offers $33 a barrel, she smilingly tells him that that sounds fair. As they shake on it, she cheekily reveals, "I would have taken $32" ... and as the two chuckle over her superior negotiating skills, she asks him if he would ever have given in to JR's demands. Clayton answers by asking her if Jock would have given in, and Miss Ellie grins and admits that he would have told the bully to go to hell...which, Clayton points out, is pretty much what he did. He then points out the irony of JR launching such an expensive operation for the purpose of blackmailing him into throwing Sue Ellen off of his ranch when she voluntarily moved out this morning...and Miss Ellie reacts to that revelation by staring back at him in stunned bewilderment. Bobby drops in at Brooktree to meet with Dr. Conrad, who tells him she's been so worried about Pam ever since she checked herself out early. Bobby tells her about the baby [Pam assumes was intended for her to raise], and that overnight she's been transformed into a whole new person who seems positively giddy at the prospect of motherhood. Dr. Conrad says she's delighted to hear that...and expresses her immense relief that the baby came into their lives when he did, 'cause the hopelessness Pam was feeling about being motherless was putting her on dangerous ground. She shudders as she adds, "I hate to think what might have happened if you didn't have that baby." She asks Bobby to pass along her best wishes to Pam and breezily expresses her hope that from now on everything in their lives will be merry and well, and Bobby thanks her and exits her office. As JR exits the house to head to work, he encounters Cliff, who has just arrived at Southfork carrying a gigantic teddy bear. JR moans, "Oh Lord" ... and when Cliff smilingly explains that he's come to meet his new nephew, JR grumbles, "With him here now I suppose we'll be overrun with Barneses." Cliff chuckles and tells him to keep smiling, then reminds him that he has only three days remaining to pay back his loan...and JR chides him for being a slow learner, 'cause he seems to have forgotten that "old JR always lands on his feet". That he does, JR. That he does. Scotty Singer offers Ray $3 million for the San Antonio property...and when Walter urges Ray to accept the offer and take the loss, he despondently agrees. After Scotty exits the office, Walter tells Ray he's sorry that they both screwed the pooch so badly on this deal, then half-heartedly suggests they join forces to develop a different housing project in the non-foreseeable future. JR arrives at Ewing Oil and asks Sly if she was able to get a hold of Jock, but she tells him that all she was able to learn was that Jock is somewhere "in the interior" and won't be back at the main camp for several days. JR snappishly asks her if she can't get any better information than that, and she's like, "Uh no" and tells him that the phone connection was so horrible it's a miracle she was able to hear anything on her end. A sour looking JR heads over to his office, where his lawyer, Howard Barker, is waiting. He informs JR that all of the subpoenas have been delivered to the various witnesses who can portray Sue Ellen as a booze guzzling monster. JR nods approvingly and says he wants to go all out at the hearing, pronouncing, "I'm going to win custody of my son if I have to drag his mother through the mud from one end of Texas to the other." Howard cautions that if he goes that route, the Ewing name will also be dragged through the mud, but JR just shrugs and says he's pretty sure Jock will forgive any bad press if it results in getting his grandson back onto Southfork. That evening at Southfork, Pam giddily tells Bobby that their son is babbling at his new teddy bear...and that she's sooooooo happy to be a mom and that Christopher is sooooooo wonderful she can't believe he's really theirs. Bobby refrains from confessing, "Now that you mention it, he's actually not" - before Miss Ellie pokes her head into the room to summon Bobby downstairs for a contentious family meeting. Miss Ellie tells Ray she now has the cash reserves to loan him the $3 million he needs for his San Antonio development, but he contorts his dumb face into an anguished expression and tells her he no longer needs it 'cause he sold the land (and lost $1 million in the process). When she stares back at him in mournful devastation, he asks her to please drop it 'cause he really just wants to forget the whole thing...and a few seconds later, she's forced to do just that as JR, Bobby, and Lucy file into the living room. When JR butts in in an attempt to take control of the family meeting, Miss Ellie growls, "Sit down, JR" and shoots him the stink-eye...and he obediently lowers himself into the nearest sofa chair. She then commences the family meeting with the preamble that she considers it her job to see that the family and Ewing Oil is run the way Jock expects the family and Ewing Oil to be run, then drops the bombshell that JR has been stockpiling oil, depleting the cash reserves in the process, and drawing against the company's assets - all for the purpose of waging a personal vendetta against Clayton Farlow for the crime of offering Sue Ellen and John Ross asylum on his ritzy ranch. She proceeds to inform the family that she sold back to Clayton the oil JR has been stockpiling at $33 a barrel, and JR's all, "The fuck?!" and snappishly tells his mama he wishes she'd stayed out of it. Miss Ellie tells him she had no choice but to step in and replenish Ewing Oil's cash reserves and makes it clear that she's no longer going to put up with his vendetta-fuelled shenanigans. JR reminds her that Jock ordered him to get John Ross back to Southfork asap, and Miss Ellie tells him that she detests his methods, then announces that it's time to vote on whether or not JR should continue as president of Ewing Oil. The vote plays out as follows:
When everyone's all, "Wha-a-a-a?" at Miss Ellie's surprising decision, she's forced to admit that there's really no one else in the family who's fully capable of running Ewing Oil - but then stipulates that Bobby will need to co-run the company until Jock returns home and is able to keep his naughty son in check. Miss Ellie then tells JR that for all of his dumb conniving to get Sue Ellen off of Southern Cross, she and John Ross voluntarily left the ranch this morning...and as everyone ambles out of the living room, JR stares into space with an expression of stunned incredulity before letting out a happy woot. At the breakfast patio the next morning, JR thanks Miss Ellie for her stay vote - but she clarifies that it wasn't a vote of confidence, then chides him for never learning from past mistakes. When JR changes the subject to his upcoming divorce hearing, Miss Ellie laments the fact that Sue Ellen is out there in the world somewhere, alone with her grandson, in need of someone to take care of them. JR assures her that Sue Ellen will eventually return to Southfork with her tail between her legs, 'cause there's been a precedent of her always needing a rich man/family to lean on, which...true enough. Miss Ellie makes it clear that if that doesn't happen, he is not to add further misery to the woman's life by vilifying her in court, and JR breezily insists that she'll be back at Southfork in no time. Clayton visits Sue Ellen in her hotel suite to drop off a few items she forgot to pack, then tells her that Dusty left town to go on the rodeo circuit. That was a remarkably speedy return to full-time cowboyin'. He adds that he got his oil supply restored after cutting a deal with Miss Ellie, which means that his refineries are going to be back in business very soon. When he tells her that Miss Ellie knows that she and John Ross have moved off of Southern Cross, Sue Ellen worriedly wonders how this is going to affect JR's strategy in court. Clayton offers to accompany her to court for moral support, but she politely declines and says she'd prefer he not be privy to all the unflattering smack talk about her bad behavior from her drinking days that JR is likely going to throw in her face during the hearing. During breakfast, Donna irritably asks Ray why he's not confiding his problems in her, then reminds him that she's on his side...and that she cares about him, not the money. Ray self-piteously whines that every time he tries to prove he's more than a dumb cowboy, he's faced with the harsh reality that he really isn't more than a dumb cowboy. An exasperated Donna reminds him for the umpteenth time that he doesn't have to prove anything to her and that she loves the yokelly simpleton she married - but he just angrily rails about how she has everything: looks, money, brains, and political savvy. He bitterly points out that she's so super awesome that she can write a book that'll become an instant bestseller, then moans, "And look at the dummy you're married to." Donna chides him for resigning himself to be "poor old dumb Ray Krebbs" just 'cause one development deal didn't work out...and when she puts her hand on his shoulder to calm him down, he backs away, shoots her a hateful look, and hisses, "Take your hands off me!" and storms out of the house, leaving Donna staring after him with a look of startled bewilderment, muttering, "What a rude, insecure dinkwhistle he is." [Sorry no - that was me, projecting.] Pam and Bobby take little Christopher to the doctor for a checkup...and when the doctor asks Bobby if he has the tot's official papers from the adoption agency detailing which shots/illnesses he's had, Bobby promises to somehow figure out a way to get that documentation. That evening at Ewing Oil headquarters, Miss Ellie summons Cliff, along with the bankers who loaned JR the $200 million he needed to stockpile oil so he could stick it to Clayton Farlow. She informs them that the company is prepared to repay their loan with interest, and sarcastically thanks them for aiding her son in his time of need. She then chides "Jock's friends" for charging his son an outrageous rate of 25% to extend the loan for ten days, then directs her ire at Cliff as she asks, "How long are you going to perpetuate this stupid Barnes-Ewing feud? Until we're all dead and gone? Is it worth it to you?" Cliff's like, "Hmm, let's see...forever, yes, and yes" and stubbornly retorts that she can't seriously expect him to apologize for the fact that JR got in over his head. Miss Ellie snarks back that she doesn't expect shit from him - but that by now he should be aware that when the Ewings stick together, they're an unbeatable force. The following morning, Miss Ellie again warns JR to not persecute Sue Ellen during today's court hearing, reminding him that he's only president of Ewing Oil by her good graces...and that if he publicly trashes his wife she won't hesitate to fire him. JR assures her he'll do nothing of the kind and promises to make her proud. Afton arrives at Mitch's condo with several pieces of luggage and tells him that her visit with their mother went fine, and that she hopes he doesn't mind her staying with him until she can find a place of her own. Mitch says he'd be happy to have her and gives her a quick update about how cordially things have been going with Lucy lately. He then scampers off to work, and Afton calls Cliff's office and leaves a message for him to call her back. JR and Howard Barker arrive at the courthouse amid a gaggle of paparazzi-like reporters who snap his photograph and pepper him with questions. JR sees Sue Ellen across the corridor and ambles over to her for a pre-hearing mindfuck. He informs her about what's on the agenda for today's hearing: a parade of witnesses who can testify to the fact that she's proven herself to be a drunk, tramp, and unfit mother. He warns that no judge in his right mind would ever award her custody of a small child, points out that she no longer has her rich lover to protect her, and urges her return to Southfork post-haste. When Sue Ellen snaps, "Never!", JR threatens to keep her tied up in litigation for a very long time, then urges her again to consider returning with their son to the Ewing ranch. Bobby is talking to his lawyer friend Eric about a legal way to adopt a baby that just kind of appeared out of nowhere and needs a home. Eric says it kinda sounds like a shady 'I bought a baby on the black market' type situation, but promises to research the issue and let him know what he uncovers. Howard Barker is about to launch Operation Destroy Sue Ellen's Credibility to Judge Berwin and describe how Sue Ellen is too much of a slutty ex-boozer to be entrusted as the primary caretaker for her son - when Miss Ellie suddenly enters the courtroom and sits in one of the spectators' seats. JR's all, "Ack!" and hastily tells Howard to stop talking. Bobby returns to Southfork - just as Rebecca is leaving the ranch. She gushes about how delighted she is about the baby, says she looks forward to being called Grandma Becky, and applauds Bobby for magically solving all of Pam's mental health problems by bringing home a baby. She then gets into her car and drives off, leaving Bobby staring concernedly into space. Judge Berwin informs the court that he's reached a decision, and then needlessly rambles on and on about how fathers can be excellent single parents, despite the long-standing tradition of judges awarding custody to the mother. As JR perks up with an expression of hopefulness that the decision is about to go his way, the judge decrees that full custody of John Ross is to be awarded to Sue Ellen, with child support payments in the amount of $6,000 a month. He adds that visitation rights will be established at a later date - but until then, JR will be allowed to visit his son on alternate weekends. Ouch. Thanks for reading! 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Recap: Bobby finds Pam lounging by pool and reminds her that it's time for her to return to Brooktree for some more intensive therapy...and after some hemming and hawing about how she doesn't think she needs anymore sessions with Dr. Conrad, she agrees to go inside, pack a bag, and return to the hospital. JR summons Jordan Lee and Vaughn Leland to his office so he can rail at them about what they're putting him through with the insane 25% interest rate attached to his ginormous loan repayment. He informs them that Cliff has given him a ten day extension in exchange for ownership of Ewing 6, and Jordan and Vaughn chuckle and tell him they're well aware of Cliff's side deal and don't much care 'bout that 'cause they're mostly looking forward to him being thrown out of Ewing Oil when he's unable to repay the loan that has, no doubt, depleted the company's cash reserves. Over at Southern Cross, Dusty announces to Sue Ellen and Clayton that he's going to spend the day riding herd with the ranch hands, and then camp with them overnight while they move the cattle. He tells Sue Ellen he'll see her tomorrow...and once he's out of earshot, Sue Ellen tells Clayton she strongly senses that she's about to lose (er, dump) Dusty because of his stupid male pride. A shirtless, sweaty Ray (blech) is chopping wood at Casa Yokel when Donna wanders over to hand him a beer and point out that they don't actually need any wood. She urges him to open up to her about what's bugging him, but he refuses and cryptically says he generally feels lousy about what a clueless dumbfuck he is and would prefer to work out his problems on his own. Donna looks visibly disappointed by being shut out, says she wishes he had more faith in her being a comforting sounding board for him when he's in need of support, and dejectedly shuffles off. JR asks Sly to book him on a plane to New York this afternoon 'cause he wants to meet with Paul Winslow, aka a stockbroker he met through Leslie Stewart during Season 4. He gets on the phone with Paul to float the idea of taking Ewing Oil public, and Paul says he'd be thrilled to chat about that further and looks forward to their meeting. Bobby drops in on an old college friend, Dr. Alan Cosby, to ask how one might go about determining a child's parentage. Alan says that since it's 1981 and DNA testing isn't really a thing yet, the best he can do is rule out who the father couldn't be. Alan delicately asks him if he unwittingly fathered a child out of wedlock, and Bobby assures him he's asking for a friend, then adds that he truly wishes the child in question had sprung from his loins. During therapy, Pam candidly tells Dr. Conrad that she really didn't want to return to Brooktree 'cause there's not a whole lot more to say about her unsolvable mommy/abandonment issues. She calls their back-and-forth regarding her mental health issues futile, then blurts out, "I need a baby! I can't have one! I can't adopt one! I think it's useless that I stay here!" and Dr. Conrad just stares back at her with an 'I'm pretty fed up with you too' expression tinged with dejected dismay. Bobby arrives at Ewing Oil and is mystified to learn that JR went to New York for a couple of days. He asks Phyllis to pull information on the company's health plan so that he can peruse the file, and when he glances over JR's health record, he sees that his blood type is B, and that Christopher's is AB. He stares incredulously at the document, leaping to the [spoiler: false] conclusion that the compatible-for-parentage blood types are irrefutable proof that his philandering brother is Christopher's bio dad. He mutters, "JR, you're about as low as a man can get." Bobby meets up with Jeff Farraday, demanding to see the baby so that he can take him to a doctor and verify that his blood type is, in fact, AB. Jeff agrees, but only for another $5,000, so Bobby tells him he'll give him a final payment of $30,000 if the baby is medically proven to be Kristin's love child. Jeff promises to hand over the baby tomorrow and makes it clear that he's A-OK with never stepping foot in Dallas for the rest of his life. Sue Ellen's attorney, Arthur Elrod, calls to tell her that her divorce hearing will be held in two weeks, then asks her to stop by his office tomorrow morning for some pre-hearing prep. That evening at Southfork, Donna tells Miss Ellie that Ray has been brooding over the San Antonio project, and is so wrecked about it that he refuses to talk to her. Miss Ellie clucks sympathetically and tells her that Ewing men find it difficult to admit wrongdoing, then says she always thought that, out of all the sons Jock sired, Ray is most like his bio dad. Donna complains that Ray always feels like he's in competition with his half-brothers - and now her, ever since she penned the Sam Culver biography and then had implausibly instant success in finding a publisher and getting a $50,000 advance check. A few seconds later, Bobby enters the room and says that Pam is newly depressed about being back at Brooktree, then bids then both goodnight and trudges upstairs. Donna tells Miss Ellie that she doesn't want to add to Bobby's problems by getting him involved in trying to get Ray to open up, so Miss Ellie offers to have a one-on-one with the yokel to see if he's willing to talk to her. Donna thanks her and says that that sounds like a marvellous idea. Sue Ellen arrives at Arthur Elrod's office and tells him that JR was behind the shutdown at Southern Cross, and that Clayton told him to go to hell when he tried to strong-arm him into kicking her off of his ranch in order to regain custody of John Ross. Arthur warns that the divorce hearing could turn into a messy shit-show, especially now that JR feels he has nothing to lose. In New York, JR meets with Paul Winslow to ask him how much cash he can raise if he's willing to take Ewing Oil public. Paul tells him he'd have access to an enormous sum of money, but then explains that first they need to consider how many shares to put out on the market and then get SEC approval...and that this entire process could take a few months. JR pales and is all, "Wuh?" and says he was hoping to fast-track the process in order to quickly access a giant bundle of dough so he can pay off his monster loans - but Paul firmly tells him that taking a company public is not an overnight kind of thing. JR stares despondently into space for a few minutes, tells Paul he'll let him know if he decides to move ahead with this ill-thought out idea (that would, uh, seem to require the approval of the family via the voting shares system that Jock just ordered be implemented), then rushes out of the office...leaving Paul staring after him in bewilderment. Sue Ellen returns to Southern Cross and finds Dusty hanging by the pool with the ranch hands, drinking beers and yukking it up. When she wanders over, Dusty introduces her to the guys, one of whom lets it slip that Dusty signed up to compete in a rodeo tomorrow...and when a concerned looking Sue Ellen asks Dusty if this is true, he says he mostly did it to see what kind of shape he's in when it comes to bronc riding. Miss Ellie summons Ray to the Southfork living room and encourages him to think of her as Jock's stand-in in whom he can confide his troubles. Ray looks anguished as he explains that he constantly feels the need to prove himself to the Ewings (despite their general horribleness), as well as to Donna, 'cause of what an impressive woman she is to have been married to the late great Sam Culver. He says he's mystified by how this savvy, brainy angel could possibly be happy married to a dumfuck cowboy such as himself...and when Miss Ellie asks him to explain exactly what's been getting under his skin lately, he confesses, "I guess I just got plain in over my head" and tells her that the San Antonio development project turned out to be a[n avoidable] bust. Miss Ellie calmly asks him what he needs, so he says he prolly could turn things around for $3 million...then whines about how he feels like too much of a jerk to confess any of this to Donna, given that most of the investment was her [late husband's] cash. Miss Ellie points out that it's far worse to not tell his own wife what's going on in his turnip for a brain, then pivots and asks him if he'd be willing to accept help from her, and charitably refers to him as "one of my Ewing sons". Ray says he'd be very grateful for her help 'cause he really just wants to get himself out of the mess he created before he admits any of it to Donna...and Miss Ellie says that first thing tomorrow they're going to meet with Franklin Horner to see about securing him a loan. JR is sitting in his New York hotel room, staring contemplatively into space. Clayton, Dusty, and Sue Ellen arrive at the rodeo...and as Dusty happily scampers off to check in at the registration table, Sue Ellen tells Clayton that, based on the fun vibe of this event, she totally gets why Dusty feels the need to re-enter the world of cowboyin'. Phyllis calls Bobby to inform him that JR is due to return from New York today, and Bobby lets out a sigh of relief. Sue Ellen worriedly watches as Dusty rides atop a bucking bronco...and when he appears to perform well, the spectators enthusiastically applaud. Over at the bank, Miss Ellie tells Franklin Horner she'd like to withdraw $3 million from the Ewing Oil reserve fund in order to loan Ray some much needed cash...and Franklin's like, "Sorry, no can do" and informs her that, at the moment, the company's cash reserves are pretty much nil. Miss Ellie's all, "The hell?", so he explains that JR has taken out some hefty loans to pay for some very expensive crude oil holding tanks, in order to hoard an insane amount of oil for the dopey purpose of preventing Clayton Farlow from having it. Franklin goes on to explain that, with the price of oil dropping, JR has had to pay for the related expenses with Ewing assets, which explains why there's currently nothing left in the company's coffers. An aghast Ray pulls Miss Ellie aside and tells her he doesn't want to add to her problems and will therefore no longer accept her financial assistance with the San Antonio project. Unbeknownst to anyone, Pam has checked herself out of Brooktree and called a cab to transport her to Southfork. At a downtown medical center, a nurse hands little Christopher to Jeff Farraday and tells him that the testing has confirmed that, yep, he's definitely Kristin's spawn. After they leave the center, Bobby hands Jeff an envelop containing $30,000, and Jeff hands him the baby and tells him to take good care of the cute little tot. Over at the rodeo, Dusty competes in bronc riding event #2 and looks to have another good performance. Bobby calls Donna and asks her for a favor: get Miss Ellie out of the house for a few hours this afternoon so that he can privately berate JR for doinking his sister-in-law and fathering little Christopher. Donna agrees to take Miss Ellie into town for some shopping, and Bobby thanks her for her help. As the rodeo starts to wrap up, Sue Ellen pulls Dusty aside to tell him that it's painfully obvious he belongs in Cowboy/Rodeo World without her...and when he half-heartedly says he doesn't want that, she insists that, yep, he truly does. She sadly calls herself a constant reminder of his penile inabilities in the sack, and that she really has zero desire to stay on at Southern Cross and watch him be alive and happy doing something in which she can never be, or have any interest in being, included. She says she'll always love him and assures him he'll have a wonderful life without her in it, then kisses his cheek - just as the other rodeo-ers drag him off to celebrate his bronc riding successes. He pleads with Sue Ellen to talk to him later, but she just stares back at him in mute tearfulness. Back at Southfork, Miss Ellie blabs to Donna about everything Ray confided in her - which I thought was pretty dickish of her - and Donna grumbles, "That damn pride of his.." and says she can't even lend him the cash he needs, 'cause otherwise he'll know that she knows why he's been so damn moody lately. As they get into Donna's car to head into town for the contrived shopping trip, JR happens to pull into the driveway. Miss Ellie's all, "Stop the car!" and tells Donna to go to town without her 'cause she has a bone to pick with JR and needs to pick it now. A few minutes later, Bobby arrives at Southfork with Christopher in tow, angrily muttering, "JR, it's time for you to stand up and be counted." [Dunno exactly why that pronouncement made me burst out laughing.] He carries Christopher into the house and is all, "Ack!" when he overhears Miss Ellie in the living room, rebuking JR for depleting Ewing Oil's cash reserves. A few seconds later, Pam happens to descend the staircase and sees the baby Bobby's holding. She shrieks, "You got our baby! I don't believe it!", then cries out for Miss Ellie to come look at the brand new baby that she and Bobby just got...and Miss Ellie and JR appear in the living room doorway and are all, "The fuckity fuck?" while Bobby stands uselessly in the background, his normally wooden face etched with an expression of helpless anguish. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: Gary arrives at Southfork with Miss Ellie, glances around the vast estate, and makes the observation that this shitty ranch never changes. Miss Ellie urges him to relax by the pool while she arranges lunch, then runs into JR and informs him that Gary has just arrived - without Valene. Gary asks JR how Jock feels about John Ross no longer residing at Southfork, and JR breezily replies that he expects his son to be returned home any day now. Gary says he doesn't doubt that, then grimly recalls the cruel way JR managed to snatch Lucy from Valene when she tried to run off with her, and JR urges him to sweep that shameful chapter of the family's history under the rug, 'cause right now the Ewings need to be rallying together to protect Ewing Oil. He criticizes Jock for putting undue pressure on certain family members when he gave them voting shares, 'cause he doesn't think it's the best way to run a company...and Gary chuckles and tells his brother he figured he wouldn't like the idea of having to consider the opinions of other family members as part of the decision-making process. JR swiftly changes the subject by asking Gary how he's enjoying his lowly job as a car salesman, then offers to set him up in his own business - in exchange for his Ewing Oil voting shares. Gary chuckles at the joy of having any kind of leverage over JR, but then stares contemplatively into space when JR urges him to strongly consider his proposal. Bobby calls Lowell Greer, aka the California lawyer who set up the trust fund that issued Kristin her monthly checks, and asks him on whose behalf she was getting all that money. Greer stonewalls him by telling him it's privileged information, then abruptly ends the call. JR summons Billy Bob McCoy, a crude oil broker, to his office to see if he's interested in taking the five million barrels of oil he's been hoarding for the last several episodes off his hands. Billy Bob makes him a lowball offer, which JR refuses 'cause he's unwilling to take a $20 million loss...so Billy Bob shrugs amiably and tells JR to call him if he changes his mind, then reminds him that the oil is worth less every day he sits on it. A few seconds later, a Mr. Holiday calls to ask JR if he needs to renew his rental on the giant oil tanks that are storing his hoarded oil, and JR snappishly tells him he'll get back to him. Jordan Lee, Vaughn Leland, and the other two JR-hating bankers drop by Wentworth Tool & Die headquarters to say hey to Cliff and inquire about whether he wants join them in their quest to screw over JR. When Vaughn reiterates to the group that his Houston bank is carrying $100 million of JR's $200 million loan, Cliff suggests that they buy up all of JR's loan notes...and when he's unable to make his payments, Jock will have no choice but to kick his eldest son out of Ewing Oil for financial malfeasance. Cliff smiles devilishly and asks the men to think about how satisfying it's going to be to tell JR that he's finished financially, and they all nod and agree that, yep, it'll be pretty darn satisfying. At lunchtime, Bobby drops by Ewing Oil to ask Phyllis to look into whether or not anyone at Ewing Oil has ever had any correspondence with a lawyer named Lowell Greer of the McCarthy & Greer law firm in California. He then cautions her to keep mum about the task 'cause he doesn't want JR to get wind of what he's digging into. Gary and Lucy return to Southfork after going out to dinner together...and when JR asks his brother if he "decided anything interesting" lately, Gary's like, "As a matter of fact I have" and says he's decided to give Lucy his Ewing Oil voting shares. As the family happily oohs and aahs at the power Lucy has suddenly acquired (putting her at the same importance level at Ewing Oil as her toddler cousin), JR contorts his face in an expression that makes it clear how less than thrilled he is by this unexpected turn of events. Martin Porter, the loan officer from the Cattlemen's National Bank, drops by Ewing Oil to tattle to JR about how Ray met with him to apply for a $3 million loan so he wouldn't have to use his wife's dough to move ahead with a real estate development. He tells JR that unless he's willing to guarantee the loan by using Ewing Oil as collateral, there's no way in hell he can lend Ray that kind of cash. JR mulls that over, instructs Martin to stall for a few days, and to keep this meeting on the down low. Over at Southern Cross, Dusty is once again watching boring old footage of himself bronc riding, and Sue Ellen stares at him concernedly before quietly slipping out of the room. Ray gets a call from Martin Porter, telling him that there's a sudden delay with the loan committee regarding his $3 million loan request, but promises to get back to him in a few days. Donna stares at Ray concernedly...and when Ray doesn't divulge to her what's clearly troubling him, she heads off to the airport to fly to New York to meet with her editor regarding the publication of her Sam Culver biography. Bobby drops in at Brooktree and learns from Dr. Conrad that she's approved a temporary release for Pam so that she can spend a couple of days at Southfork. Pam gushes about how excited she is to return to life on the oppressive ranch...and after she excuses herself, Dr. Conrad tells Bobby how important it is for Pam to feel as though she's working towards a goal. She then advises him to treat his wife as normally as possible...and, for the love of all that is holy, be truthful about how hopeless it for them to get a baby anytime soon. Ray returns to Casa Yokel and finds JR waiting for him. JR tells Ray he heard about his financial issues, and that he'd be happy to guarantee his $3 million loan in exchange for his Ewing Oil voting shares. When Ray refuses, JR warns that his San Antonio project could collapse without the loan, then points out that, in all likelihood, Jock will return from South America before a proxy vote even needs to occur. Ray chews on that for a few seconds, then grudgingly promises to think about his offer, and JR shoots him a smug grin before heading back to his car. Sue Ellen returns to Southern Cross after spending a few hours downtown...and when Dusty demands to know where she's been, she motions at her upswept helmet-head 'do and says she was at the hair salon. Dusty snorts derisively and says he knows that the stylist is "on the make" 'cause of how hungrily he's always looking at her. Sue Ellen argues that she doesn't notice other men 'cause of how devoted she is to him, but he bitterly rejoins, "I see the way they look at you. They think they'd like to go to bed with you." She insists again that she only wants him, but he reminds her about the flaccid state of his penis and figures that sooner or later she's going to look elsewhere for sex. Sue Ellen's like, "Noooo Dusty! I only want you!" - but he responds by angrily storming off. Sly buzzes JR to inform him that Cliff Barnes is here to see him, and JR grumbles, "Tell him to get lost" - but Cliff easily saunters past Sly and strides into JR's office. When JR demands to know what in blazes he's doing here, Cliff hands him a document and explains that it's a transfer of assignment of debt for $100 million...and that he and a group of JR-haters all chipped in and bought it for the purpose of foreclosing on him. Cliff smugly adds that he's got less than a week to pay, and that oil prices are continuing to drop rapidly. He giddily tells JR he can't wait for him to default on the loan, and that the first thing he plans on doing when he takes over his Ewing Oil office is get rid of all the tacky furniture. LOL. As he gaily skips off, JR stares after him worriedly. The next day, Bobby asks Phyllis if she had any luck finding out if anyone at Ewing Oil contacted Lowell Greer, and she tells him she's still working on it. A few seconds later, he gets a call from Dr. Conrad, informing him that Pam is ready to be transported to Southfork, and Bobby says he'll be at Brooktree pronto. Sue Ellen sees Dusty saddling his horse and is all, "Ack!" as she rushes over to remind him that he's not yet physically strong enough to ride. Dusty says he's determined to ride, grumbling, "I can't be a man in the bedroom; at least I can be a man in the saddle", then climbs atop his horse and gallops off while Sue Ellen continues to cry, "Noooo, Dusty!" Dr. Waring summons Mitch to his office to escort his patient's pain-in-the-ass mother, Mrs. Rogers, to the coffee shop so that he can talk to his patient alone. Mitch is like, "I have rounds...but, yeah OK, whatever" and urges Mrs. Rogers along, ignoring her attempts to flirt with him. That was kind of a random scene with no further follow-up in this episode. Bobby and Pam arrive at Southfork and are greeted by Miss Ellie, who happily informs Pam that she has a fun surprise for her...which she soon learns is a redecorated bedroom done up in what I can only describe as 'dowdy old lady dust ruffle', where the before probably looked marginally better than the after. When Miss Ellie excuses herself, Pam tells Bobby she's optimistic that they'll be happy again, then leans in for a hug and kiss. Cliff drops by Ewing Oil that evening to inform JR that he and his fellow loan note holders have agreed to give him a ten day extension at 25% interest (up from the original 12%). Yikes. When JR agrees, Cliff says there's one additional condition: handing over ownership of the Ewing 6 oil field, aka the piece of land that Jock allegedly swindled Digger out of during the 1940s. JR snarls that he has no intention of allowing a Barnes to own one foot of Ewing property, then says he'll figure out a way to pay off his ginormous loan...and Cliff just kind of shrugs and warns that oil prices aren't going to rise any time soon, and that he has only three days to make his loan payment. Ray tells JR he's declining his offer of guaranteeing his $3 million loan in exchange for handing over his Ewing Oil voting shares. JR snarls about what a stupid decision that is, so Ray bitchily points out that if he keeps his voting shares he could one day be part of the effort that throws him out of Ewing Oil for good. After he stomps off, JR calls Billy Bob McCoy and asks if they can meet asap. Phyllis tells Bobby that after much digging she found a letter addressed to Lowell Greer in JR's personal file...and Bobby asks her to make a copy of the letter, put the original back into the folder, and never speak of it again. Bobby then reads over the letter, which references a previous phone conversation between JR and Greer, along with confirmation that JR sent the law firm $25,000 to cover Kristin's expenses for a one year period. Sue Ellen is worriedly watching Dusty as he rides his horse when Clayton wanders over and remarks on how Dusty has always dreamed of being a cowboy. Sue Ellen says she can't imagine life without him, flaccid member or not, and Clayton says that, as a man, he can definitely understand why Dusty would be so emotionally wrecked about his malfunctioning penis. JR tells Billy Bob McCoy that he's finally willing to sell him his oil - but Billy Bob says he's no longer interested, not least 'cause, at the moment, no one's buying or selling oil. A shocked JR growls that he's going to remember this refusal next time he needs a favor, so Billy Bob suggests he sell his oil to Clayton Farlow, 'cause surely he'd be willing to take it off his hands - but JR refrains from telling him that he got himself into this ludicrous quagmire as a means of preventing Clayton from receiving his usual supply as punishment for not kicking Sue Ellen off his ranch. Over at the Cattlemen's Club, Ray and Martin Sherr are lamenting the unfavorable soil report that's thrown a wrench into their San Antonio project. Martin tells Ray he should come clean to Donna about the need for additional funds and/or hit up the Ewings for a cash infusion, but Ray says he doesn't like the idea of dragging anyone else into his self-inflicted mess. Bobby has another clandestine meeting with Jeff Faraday and offers him $25,000 for Kristin's baby and end the need for any more of these clandestine meetings. Jeff promises to deliver the tot to him tomorrow and warns him not to alert any law enforcement...and Bobby promises to come alone, then mutters to himself, "JR, you've got one big surprise coming." Back at Southfork, Pam and Rebecca are hanging with Miss Ellie in the kitchen, gabbling about Cliff's new CEO position. Pam expresses her wish that Cliff will finally "bury the hatchet" with JR, which...heh. JR drops by Cliff's office to sheepishly request a ten day extension for his ginormous loan. Cliff grinningly hands him a document to sign that will transfer ownership of Ewing 6 to the Barnes clan, then reminds JR that he's merely buying time for a temporary delay in repaying the $100 million loan and that he'll be thrown out of Ewing Oil if he can't pay up in full. JR signs the ownership paper and shoots Cliff an extra squinty stink-eye before exiting the office, leaving Cliff to cackle, "I can't believe it. After all these years, I finally whipped JR Ewing!" Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: At the patio breakfast table at Southfork, Miss Ellie reads the morning paper and asks JR if he's aware of the recent drop in oil prices, and he mumbles that he is and that he's crossing his fingers that it's only temporary. A few seconds later, Ray and Donna drop by and also remark on the drop in oil prices, and Donna says she thinks it could be a good thing, 'cause it means that gas will be more affordable at the pump for everyday folk. JR grumbles that it's not good for Ewing Oil, and Ray says this is going to be a giant headache for any distributors sitting on a huge pile of oil 'cause they'll patiently have to wait for the price to go up. Heh. JR stares worriedly into space for a few seconds before abruptly getting up and leaving for work, and then Donna and Miss Ellie head off to meet with a decorator, presumably the one who's assisting them with the refresh of Pam's/Bobby's bedroom. Over at Southern Cross, Clayton's foreman tells him that if the oil shutdown continues to drag on, he'll have no choice but to lay off another five hundred men. Clayton overrides that decision and instructs him to keep the men on the payroll at half salary - despite him not really being able to afford to do that. Sue Ellen, who's breakfasting outdoors, hears that last thing and tells Clayton she doesn't want to be responsible for destroying everything he's built...but he tells her he can't stand the idea of giving in to JR's blackmail, then points out that JR has created a stupid quandary for himself: he's sitting on 500 million barrels of oil, which is declining in value by the day. During a therapy session, Pam tells Dr. Conrad that lately she's been so fixated on Rebecca's abandonment of her 'cause most women don't just up and leave their small children. Dr. Conrad [rather dickishly, IMO] points out that the same thing happened to Cliff and he seems to be coping fine - but Pam points out that, in fact, her brother's coping mechanism was to feel bitterness about their mother leaving them, and never wanting to talk about it. She then complains about how she was never able to have a relationship with her mother and, in turn, won't have one with her non-existent biological children, which is why she felt so empty the day she ended up on the roof of a tall building. Dr. Conrad points out that she can always adopt a baby and that it's simply a matter of time before the adoption agencies are able to produce an available tot, but Pam gets a crazed look in her eyes as she starts railing about how she's unable to stand the pain of waiting any length of time, not least 'cause she neeeeeeeds to prove to herself that if she had a baby:
A concerned looking Dr. Conrad's all, "Okaaaay" and asks her if having a child would make her internal pain go away, and Pam stares back at her with a spacey expression while mumbling, "I dunno." JR arrives at Ewing Oil and finds Vaughn Leland waiting for him in his office, cackling to himself as he reads the newspaper article about the drop in oil prices. JR pretends to be unconcerned about the rapid devaluation of the insane amount of oil he's currently hoarding and assures Vaughn that the price will soon rise...and Vaughn's like, "Uh when?" and reminds him that his first loan payment is due in a few days and that he's lost about $5 million overnight. JR breezily says he's not worried, on account of he's always able to come out on top whenever he's faced with any hardship and is confident that he'll do so in this situation...then tells Leland that he and his fellow banker friends just need to chillax. Over at Casa Yokel, Donna is wrapping up a meeting with her new editor, Edward Chapmen, when Ray returns home. Donna introduces him to Edward and explains that he's agreed to publish the biography she just penned about her late rich husband, Sam Culver. Edward gushes about Donna's "stunning insight into politics" and tells Ray he should be proud of his wife, who's about to become a bestselling author ['cause...sure, a biography about a non-living, obscure Texas politician sounds like a total page-turner for the masses]. As Donna walks Edward to his car, Ray gets a call from Neal Hart, who tells him they need to get together pronto to discuss a problem that has arisen following the soil test from his San Antonio property. Uh oh. Ray suggests they meet at The Cattlemen's Club tomorrow for lunch. Bobby meets up with Jeff Farraday to give him $2,000 in exchange for copies of the monthly checks Kristin received from a California law firm. Bobby asks who set up the trust fund from which the checks were issued, and Jeff is all, "Dunno" and says it's not his problem if this is a dead end 'cause he really just wants to wrap up this I have custody of Kristin's baby storyline and get the hell outa Dallas. JR drops by the Stardrift Lounge to inform Afton that he arranged with Milton to give her the weekend off so that she's free to sexily frolic in the Bahamas with Vaughn Leland and "keep him happy". Afton's all, "Eww.." and says she's done all she's going to where that fossil is concerned, not least 'cause she's pretty sure JR is full of shit about his ability to get her a recording contract. JR snarls at her to do what he's ordering her to do, then grabs her by the arm - just as Mitch enters the restaurant, sees that his sister is being manhandled, and rushes over to punch JR in the face. An enraged JR glares at Afton and tells her she's finished, growling, "There's a million tramps like you around. I'm just going to have to find myself another one." After he storms out, Afton thanks Mitch for stepping up like a good big brother should...then decides that since Milton is no doubt going to fire her as the Stardrift Lounge's superfluous nighttime entertainer, they should go out and enjoy a nice dinner. She then stares contemplatively into space and says she's come to the realization that she's been going about her quest for wealth the wrong way. Vaughn Leland drops by Ewing Oil and is introduced by JR to Afton's replacement: a sultry brunette named Heather Wilson. JR tells Vaughn that Heather works for the Bahamas Chamber of Commerce (a dubious claim, I can only assume) ... and that since the Chamber is always trying to drum up tourism, she'd love to invite him to the islands for an all-expense paid vacation. Vaughn looks intrigued by the prospect, then asks Heather if she could step outside for a minute so he can make it clear to JR that, regardless of him pimping out a sexy new woman with whom he can indulge in a Bahamian sex romp, he still expects the loan payment in ten days. JR assures him it won't be a problem, and Vaughn smilingly exits his office as he promises to send him a postcard. Over at the Cattlemen's Club, Neal Hart informs Ray that the San Antonio land he purchased can't support residential construction unless every unit they build is reinforced with piles, which is going to increase the project's cost 50% more than was originally budgeted. Ray scrunches his dumb face concernedly and says he doesn't have the dough for that, then asks Neal to hold off doing anything for at least a couple of days while he flounders around cluelessly and decides his next move. Neal agrees, then tells the dimwit that soil testing is typically done prior to purchasing land, and Ray sheepishly explains the colossal clusterfuck by mumbling, "Fools rushing in." Bobby stares at the copies of the checks Kristin received monthly, then tries (in vain) to contact the California lawyer who set up the the mysterious trust fund. Lucy returns to Southfork - just as Miss Ellie is bicycling back to the house after checking the mailbox. She opens a large envelop from Jock, quickly reads over at the papers inside, and exclaims, "Oh my Lord!" During pre-dinner drinks at Southfork that evening, Miss Ellie announces to the family that Jock wanted her to inform them all of some major changes he's decided to implement at Ewing Oil. He writes that while he trusts JR (sorta), he's become dismayed that "at times he takes a somewhat headstrong approach to business", adding that he thought the same of Bobby when he was briefly at the helm. Therefore, to avoid JR treating the oil company like his own private treasury and fiefdom, he's divvying up voting shares (for all major decisions) to be allocated in the following manner:
Incidentally, I find it noteworthy that a male Ewing toddler gets 10 shares, while his fully grown female cousin, Lucy, gets zip. A shell-shocked JR pretends to be unfazed by the new checks and balances to which he's going to have to adhere, and raises his glass while toasting, "Here's to daddy for looking out for the welfare of Ewing Oil." The next morning at breakfast, Miss Ellie tells Donna she's not sure that Jock did the right thing by giving her the most voting shares and opening the door to what will likely become an annoying rivalry among his sons. She then wrings her hands about 1) how pressure-averse Gary is going to react to now having a say about what goes on at Ewing Oil, and 2) how JR is going to react to giving up the fiscal autonomy he's been enjoying for a really long time. Donna suggests they forget about these problems for now and focus on redecorating Pam's/Bobby's bedroom, and Miss Ellie agrees - but only after she gives Gary a call. The Ewing Oil accountant shows JR the company books and assures him that everything looks on the up and up - except for the teensy effect the drop in oil prices might have on their bottom line. JR says he anticipates that oil prices will rise very soon, then urges the accountant to take some extended vacation time, starting Monday, [so that he's incommunicado when the imminent shitstorm over his oil hoarding scheme comes to light]. JR then buzzes Sly to instruct her to bring him some cartons, 'cause he's got some stuff he wants to put in storage. Over in Knot's Landing, Valene is eavesdropping on Gary's call with Miss Ellie and looking less than thrilled about him being dragged into the latest Ewing Oil drama. Gary tells her he feels the need to head back to Southfork to ease Miss Ellie's mind about the voting shares situation..and when Valene worriedly points out that being around his shitty family usually makes him want to head to the nearest bar and guzzle as much booze as humanly possible, he assures her that this time everything is going to turn out A-OK. Afton drops by Cliff's office to marvel at his important new CEO job and offer to help him stick it to JR with the aid of some tasty intel she'd like to share. Cliff grins at the prospect, and the two agree to go out and chat about it over a drink. While holding hands and strolling through a park, Pam tells Bobby she'd really really like to return to Southfork and resume her job at The Store, then meekly admits that Dr. Conrad has made it clear she feels that that'd be rushing things. She asks Bobby if he's heard back from any of the adoption agencies, and he vaguely replies that he keeps in regular touch with them, but hasn't yet heard anything definitive about a baby. Pam happily says she's been pondering various baby names and likes Bobby, Jr. and Rebecca...and Bobby stares back at her lovingly as the two exchange I love yous. Ray attempts to get a $3 million loan to finance his San Antonio project from the Cattlemen's National Bank ('cause he doesn't want to use his wife's dough), and the loan officer, Martin Porter, expresses doubt that it'd be approved without collateral - but tells him that the loan committee will pretend to go through the motions of reviewing his request and render a decision in a few days. Afton tells Cliff that JR has borrowed a total of $200 million ($100 million from Vaughn Leland) to hoard millions of barrels of oil, the value of which is dropping by the day. She adds that she refused to prostitute herself with Leland, who - after throwing back a few drinks one night - let it slip that he hates JR with the intensity of a thousand suns and hopes to hell that he defaults on his ginormous loan. Cliff asks her what any of this has to do with him, so she tells him how desperately she wants revenge for JR's shabby treatment of her and figured that since he's a powerful CEO he's now in a position to join forces with her and take advantage of the idiotic predicament JR has put himself into. Cliff says he likes the sound of that, then orders champagne, with which Afton toasts, "Good endings to bad beginnings." Back at Southern Cross, Dusty and Sue Ellen are watching more boring old footage of him bronc riding when JR calls to tell Dusty he'd like to meet in person. Dusty mulls that over and agrees to come to Dallas (while not letting on to Sue Ellen that he's talking to her husband) and JR buzzes Sly to tell her to free up his schedule by cancelling tomorrow's appointments. At Casa Yokel, Ray is on the phone, admonishing Walter Sherr for selling him a plot of land that's not fit for construction. Walter says he had no idea that the soil test would turn out so disastrously and condescendingly reminds Ray that he should have tested it prior to purchasing the land. A few seconds later, Donna rushes over to excitedly show Ray her $50,000 advance check for her upcoming Sam Culver biography, and Ray half-heartedly says he's very proud of her, though can't help but feel wistful about his failures. Donna asks him if he'd like to take her out to celebrate her windfall, but he says he's not feeling up to it and needs to run an errand...and as he dejectedly lumbers off, Donna stares after him concernedly. Bobby tells his Senate aides that he's decided to not run for reelection 'cause he has too many family issues that make it impossible to focus his attention on a sub-plot that the Dallas writers leaped into but now no longer have any clue what to do with. He apologizes for letting them down and shakes their hands as they file out of his office. Vaughn Leland arrives at Afton's apartment and says he was surprised to hear from her...and she makes it clear that this is strictly a business meeting, then summons Cliff, who emerges from the other room. When Vaughn's all, "The hell?", Cliff says that since they share a common enemy in JR they should consider doing business together, then cheerily proposes, "How about Pin the Tail on the Ewing?" JR arrives at the city's football stadium as Dusty helicopters in for their tête-à-tête. JR tells Dusty that when he got wind of his limp penis during the custody hearing, he couldn't help but wonder how long Sue Ellen would remain committed to a sexless relationship, given that she's "a lady of tempestuous moods" who finds it a challenge to stay out of hot guys' beds. Dusty advances on him, slaps him across the face, and tells him he's disgusting - but an unfazed JR insists that he speaks the truth and suggests that Sue Ellen is probably so hard up for sex these days that she's been sneaking into Clayton's bedroom in order to ride his baloney pony. Ew. As a visibly revolted Dusty whirls around and storms back to his chopper, JR bellows, "There's only one person who's man enough to keep that lady happy and on Southern Cross...and that sure as hell ain't you!", a bogus taunt that appears to crawl deep beneath Dusty's skin. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: Afton is rehearsing in the Stardrift Lounge when JR enters the restaurant and interrupts her to bark about how annoyed he is with her for not behaving in more flirty a manner with Vaughn Leland. Afton pretends as though she had no idea she was supposed to be hitting the sheets with a man she complains makes her skin crawl. A vexed JR asks her if she's willing to give up a lucrative recording contract for the sake of her personal dignity, and Afton mulls that over for a few seconds and decides 'mmm...nope' and promises to do a better job of warming up to the aged banker. Bobby drops by Jordan Lee's office to confront him about all the checks he's been sending to Kristin...and when he weakly claims it was a loan, Bobby dramatically holds up the print copy of Christopher Shepard's birth certificate and demands the truth. Jordan sheepishly tells him that an extortionist named Jeff Farraday is blackmailing him, then insists that since Kristin was doinking a bunch of different men months before she gave birth, it's questionable whether or not he's the father. He further explains that he paid Kristin a monthly sum for her silence, 'cause if his wife found out he'd been cheating on her, she'd open a can of whoop-ass on him he'd not soon forget. Bobby reminds him that since Kristin is now dead, her baby daddy has a responsibility to care for the hapless infant...and Jordan wearily says he needs some time to think over the messy situation of his own making, and will call him once he's figured everything out. Over at Southern Cross, Sue Ellen tells Dusty she's abstaining from horseback riding 'cause she knows how painful it is for him to no longer be able to ride, and Dusty's all, "Noooo! I feel like I'm crippling you too if you don't ride." Clayton summons them to breakfast - just as some guy named Joe from the Galveston refinery pulls up to report that, due to the sudden stoppage of their crude oil deliveries, he's going to have to start laying people off. Clayton furrows his brows and says that he's determined to get to the bottom of this suspiciously timed conundrum. JR is on the phone with Mr. Williamson, aka the distributor who has agreed to divert Clayton's oil supply to him. Mr. Williamson says he's taking an abrupt vacation 'cause he's too much of a scaredy-cat to face Clayton's wrath when he gets wind of how hard he just screwed him over. JR hangs up and muses to himself that Clayton will get his oil when he returns his son to Southfork. Ray and Donna meet with Walter Sherr at the Cattlemen's Club to formally move forward with the San Antonio housing development. Ray remarks on how this is the first time he'll be wheelin' and dealin' without the aid of Jock or Punk Anderson, and Walter assures him that the land in question is a prime piece of real estate and that everything is going to turn out super fantastic. Cliff and Rebecca drop in at Brooktree to visit Pam, who now says she was acting foolishly when she threatened to leap off the roof of a tall building. [Which is a ridiculously giant understatement, but OK.] She says that Dr. Conrad has been peppering her with questions about her childhood, then asks Rebecca if she seemed like a happy baby. Rebecca says she was, then reminisces about the day she took her first steps. Pam beams at her recollection and asks how old she was when she first started talking, and Rebecca turns silent 'cause by then she had already abandoned her family. Pam's expression instantly morphs from happy to blank as she abruptly declares that she's tired and wants to head back to her room to rest. Lucy meets up with Mitch in downtown Dallas and tells him in a few hours she's off to Houston to do some publicity work for the Miss Young Dallas campaign. Mitch, in turn, shares his good news that he's decided to specialize in plastic surgery and, to that end, has been accepted as an intern at Frank Waring's hospital. He says that this means he'll be staying in Dallas for the foreseeable future, and Lucy woots and happily hugs him before rushing off to get ready for her trip. A visibly annoyed Clayton informs Dusty and Sue Ellen that his supply of crude oil has been diverted and bought up by someone who's dickishly trying to shut down his operation. He cryptically says he has his suspicions and vows that there's going to be hell to pay when he confirms the identity of the scoundrel, which Sue Ellen seems to correctly assume is her soon-to-be ex-husband. Clayton is on the phone with the uber-boss of Texas's oil distribution, demanding to know why he hasn't received his shipment. The man studies the distribution list and is all, "Hmm...that's weird" when he sees that Clayton's name has been crossed off. When Clayton learns that his usual distributor, Mr. Williamson, is currently on vacation, he snarls that he's done ever doing business with that man...and after he slams the phone down, he tells Dusty that their dwindling oil supply is likely going to trigger a shutdown of their operation. Dusty's all, "Bummer", then tells him that Sue Ellen went into town a few hours ago. Sue Ellen storms into JR's office, and he reacts by mockingly asking, "Getting a little tired of the celibate life, are you?" She ignores that jab at Dusty's penile deficiencies and demands to know whaddup with him buying up Clayton's oil supply. JR shoots back that it's none of her business - but that if she sends John Ross back to Southfork, Clayton's oil problems will magically disappear. Sue Ellen seethes, "Never" and tells him she's going to win the divorce settlement, and JR rejoins, "What I want I get...eventually", and while she's storming out of his office, he chuckles about her "long, lonely nights on Southern Cross" ... and says this as though he had been regularly pleasuring her in their Southfork bedroom the entire time she was his obedient trophy wife. Lucy tells Miss Ellie that she saw Mitch yesterday and learned that he's going to be staying in Dallas while he trains to become a wealthy plastic surgeon. Miss Ellie cautions her that Mitch may have made the decision to change his specialty to plastic surgery in an effort to keep pace with her expectations...and that one day he might resent her for changing his ideals. Lucy just kind of shrugs at that prediction and says she hopes that Mitch's new career means they can get back together, then rushes off when her airport shuttle pulls into the driveway. Clayton is working the phones in an attempt to get to the bottom of his oil delivery quagmire and how he might avoid a mass layoff. Senator Dickson drops in on Bobby to admonish him for taking too much time off to tend to Pam's mental health issues and, in turn, abdicating his responsibility to show up in Austin once in awhile to vote on the floor. He bitterly recalls that he was almost defeated in getting some project in his district passed, then warns Bobby that one day he might need a senatorial favor...and when that day comes, he can go pee up a rope if he expects his support. After he storms out, Jordan Lee stops by to hand Bobby a doctor's report verifying his blood type...which apparently precludes him from being the father of Kristin's spawn. Bobby's all, "Wha-a-a?" and stares at the medical report in stunned bewilderment. Sue Ellen returns to Southern Cross and tells Dusty and Clayton that earlier today she stormed over to JR's office 'cause she suspected him of being the scoundrel who shut off their crude oil supply...and that he confirmed that, yep, he did it for the purpose of getting John Ross back onto Southfork. Clayton wonders aloud where JR is storing all of that oil, 'cause the rental units have gotta be costing him a fortune. Sue Ellen tells him that JR will go to any lengths for revenge, then says she should prolly cave and return their son to the Ewing estate post-haste. When Dusty and Clayton protest that decision, she tells them she can't stay and ruin their lives in the process, then tearily whimpers, "Pleeeeeease let me go away." Afton is performing at the Stardrift Lounge when she notices Cliff arrive with a date. She wraps up her song and takes a break to sashay over to the bar to say hey to Cliff, and to remind him that he's a nice guy without a future. Cliff informs her that something monumental has changed in his life, and that it has everything to do with Wentworth Tool & Die - in case she's interested in looking into that on her own - then urges her to scuttle off when his date returns from the ladies room. Ray and Donna arrive at the Southfork breakfast buffet, where JR is chowing down and reading the newspaper. He remarks on how relieved he is that the price of oil seems to be holding steady - just as Miss Ellie wanders over and says she was just on the phone with Jock, but that the connection was so terrible he told her he'd try to call again tonight. Donna tells the two that she and Ray are jetting to San Antonio later to check out some land she and Ray have invested in to build a development of townhouses...and JR snidely tells her her late husband would be spinning in his grave if he knew that a cowboy simpleton was sweet talking her out of his hard earned cash. Donna shoots him the stink-eye before shoving him (fully clothed) into the swimming pool, a move that causes Miss Ellie (and me) to laugh out loud, along with JR as he calls after her, "Donna, don't go away mad!" [I must interject here to emphasize that Larry Hagman is the absolute best thing about re-watching Dallas.] Bobby meets up with Jeff Farraday to inform him that Jordan Lee has been medically ruled out as the bio dad of Kristin's spawn, then suggests that he hand the baby over to a known living relative, e.g. Sue Ellen. Jeff argues that the baby is his "ace in the hole" and insists that he's doing nothing wrong with holding onto him 'cause Kristin personally asked him to take care of him. Bobby scrunches his face perplexedly and says that someone else had to have been giving Kristin money during her maternity grift, and Jeff says that the only other source of money he knew of was a trust fund, with a law firm facilitating her monthly stipend. Bobby perks up at that tidbit and says he'd like to see copies of those checks, and Jeff agrees to produce them in a couple of hours and adds that that documentation is going to cost him another $2,000. Pam tells Dr. Conrad about her visit with Cliff and Rebecca, then blanks out when she says that Rebecca wasn't able to recall when she started talking 'cause by that point she had abandoned her family. Dr. Conrad stares concernedly at her, then summons a nurse to escort Pam back to her room. She then gets on the phone with Bobby and says they need to talk about his wife asap, and he looks alarmed and says he'll be right there. Clayton returns to Southern Cross looking visibly unhappy about not being able to resolve his crude oil supply problems. Over at Ewing Oil, JR instructs Sly to issue all of the necessary checks for the many storage units it's going to take to hold Clayton's oil supply. He then asks her to get Clayton on the phone for him...and during a brief conversation, the two men agree to meet tomorrow morning. Dr. Conrad tells Bobby that she's worried Pam is heading towards a full-blown psychotic depression. She asks about her early life, so Bobby tells her that after her mother disappeared she was raised by Digger and her Aunt Maggie...and that Rebecca only recently resurfaced after Pam hired an investigator to locate her. Dr. Conrad wonders aloud why she'd want to search for her mother after all these years, so Bobby explains that Pam had recently learned that Digger wasn't her biological father...which effectively means that she's an extra suffering orphan 'cause she's lost her mother and both fathers. Dr. Conrad chews on that intel for a few seconds and says that knowing this is going to be very helpful in how she treats Pam during their therapy sessions, and adds that she can only assume that Pam's desperate need to love and care for a child is a way to somehow retroactively make things right for Baby Pam. Seems plausible. Jeff Farraday tries to contact Bobby at his office, but his secretary tells him he abruptly left to tend to a family emergency. Ray and Donna are in San Antonio, looking at the plot of land they just purchased from Walter Sherr. A few seconds later, architect Neal Hart arrives, gets introduced to Walter, and asks Ray if he's had the soil tested to ensure that the land is actually suitable for construction. Ray stares back at him dumbly and says he didn't know enough to do that before making such a huge purchase, and Neal's like, "No big deal" and says he'll bring in his engineer to take care of it. Ray and Donna amble off with Walter while Neil glances around at the acres of undeveloped land, grabs a handful of soil [that I can only guess isn't going to turn out to be the right kind], and stares at it contemplatively. That evening at Southfork, JR assures Jock over the phone that everything's going swimmingly with Operation Hoard Texas's Oil Supply 'cause he can only assume that Clayton won't want to just stand by while his refineries are shut down. He says after Clayton caves to his demands, he'll repay the $200 million he took out in loans...and promises his daddy that when he returns to Southfork, John Ross will be here and that the Ewings will once again be a big happy family. The next morning at breakfast, Bobby laments to Miss Ellie about how much he misses Pam, and that her doctor warned him that right now she's in a critical phase and might possibly not get any better. He's pretty sure that a baby will pull her out of her depression - but he's powerless to do anything to help 'cause he's been to every adoption agency in town, without having any luck, and has even considered adopting illegally. Miss Ellie asks him if Pam is even well enough to care for a baby - uh, right?? - and Bobby vaguely insists that she's great around children, her mental health problems notwithstanding. Miss Ellie coos at him to chillax and give Dr. Conrad a chance to work her magic, given that Pam has only been in therapy for less than a week. Clayton arrives at his meeting with JR and angrily greets him by calling him a snake and asking how much he wants for his crude oil supply. JR says the price is returning Sue Ellen and John Ross to Southfork, so Clayton reminds him that Sue Ellen hates him with the intensity of a thousand suns and therefore doesn't ever want to return to her marital home. JR points out, "She can't make it on her own. Every time she runs away, it's to another man" - which...true enough - but Clayton declines his ultimatum 'cause of how much he respects Sue Ellen and how strongly he feels that a young lad like John Ross belongs with his mother. JR shoots him the stink-eye and growls, "I'll break you" and Clayton points out that he's the one who's going broke, then explains that he's been keeping track of the price of oil and has found that it's starting to drop. He smugly tells JR that the bankers who must have loaned him an insane amount of money to hoard the Texas oil supply aren't going to be patient forever, and that there may not even be a Ewing Oil by the time Jock returns from South America...and JR responds to that prediction by staring back at him with his face scrunched concernedly. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: Bobby pours himself a cup of coffee on the Southfork breakfast patio, then tells Ray and Donna that he's off to Brooktree to visit Pam. Once Bobby is out of earshot, Ray tells Donna he's surprised that Pam went so far off the deep end 'cause of how badly she wants a baby, then points out that they've never discussed the prospect of having children. Donna mulls that over for a few seconds and says she wouldn't mind having a cute cowboy like him (blech) - just as Miss Ellie emerges from the house and informs them that Jock just phoned to report that he's currently on his way to whatever fictional South American country has given him permission to look into how best the U.S. can exploit its oil supply. JR is in a meeting with the three biggest banks in Dallas, demanding a low interest rate on the insane amount of money they're discussing lending him so that he can hoard the entire Texas oil supply for the sole purpose of sticking it to Sue Ellen. The bankers agree to lend him $100 million and tell them they found a banker in Houston who might lend him the other $100 million he wants...and a few seconds later, Vaughn Leland makes as dramatic an entrance as someone who's as charisma-free as he is could possibly make. As JR stares at him in stunned bewilderment, Vaughn explains that he works at a Houston bank now, and that all the charges he faced after getting tangled up in JR's Southeast Asian fiasco last season have been dropped. Over at Brooktree, Pam laments to Bobby how badly she's let him down by suffering a suicidal meltdown - but he breezily tells her all that matters is that she get better. Pam miserably urges him to dump her in favor of someone who can give him a family, but Bobby insists that she's all the family he needs. When JR arrives at his Ewing Oil office, Sly informs him that Miss Ellie had called to pass along the update that Jock had a brief layover in Dallas before flying on to South America. JR snappishly asks Sly why she didn't let him know about this when he could have rushed to the airpot to bask in the glow of being in his daddy's presence, so she tells him she did call - but that the secretary at the bankers' office refused to interrupt their meeting by putting her through. JR glares at her and growls, "For your future reference, there is nothing more important than my daddy", then stomps to his office and gets a phone call from someone who offers him another million barrels of oil that had been earmarked for Clayton Farrow. Bobby arrives at his senate office and gets a call from Jeff Farraday, who offers to meet with him at a public park tomorrow morning. He tells Bobby that for $2,000, he'll provide more information about Kristin's baby, then instructs him to come to the park alone. Katherine pops by Brooktree to visit Pam, and Pam says that while she's delighted to finally meet her, she's sooooo embarrassed that she's currently in a mental hospital. Katherine says she needn't be embarrassed, 'cause after all they're sisters, then says she's about to return to New York to get back to her TV job. Pam looks alarmed and goes, "No! You can't!" and says she really really wants to learn from her what it was like to grow up having Rebecca as a mom, and Katherine looks weirded out by her distress and assures her that they'll have plenty of time to catch up. Vaughn Leland drops by JR's office and tells him he's not sure why he'd want to do business with him, given the legal problems he faced when he got entangled in last season's Southeast Asian scheme. JR urges him to put that in the past, but Vaughn's like, "Uh, my wife left me as a result of that fiasco" ... so JR reminds him that he made a lot of money on that scheme, then vows to do whatever it takes to repair their friendship. He urges Vaughn to give him twenty-four hours to demonstrate what a good friend he can be, and Vaughn says he'd better come up with a spectacular case for his financial assistance - otherwise no loan. At Southfork, the Ewings gather together for pre-dinner drinks...and Dave Culver is making a guest appearance, updating everyone on Jock's South American venture. He explains that since there's so much turmoil in the Middle East, the U.S. government is looking to drill for oil elsewhere and figured 'why not start exploiting another part of the world?' Dave proudly adds, "The U.S. government is giving Jock a big job to do", and Bobby and JR chuckle about how this implausible government request must surely remind Jock of his wildcattin' days of yore. Dave concurs, then tells JR that the government is looking for other oilmen to join them, and JR kind of winces at the prospect of giving up his cushy lifestyle and says he'd love to, were it not essential for him to remain at the helm of Ewing Oil to make sure it's being run properly...and says this as though Operation Hoard Texas's Oil Supply, a maneuver designed to get Sue Ellen to return John Ross to Southfork, is a reasonable manner in which to be running a multi-million dollar oil company. Miss Ellie and Donna discuss their plan to buy some new bedroom furniture for Pam in order to "give her a lift" when she returns home. Miss Ellie then remarks on how much she misses Jock...and when Donna's all, "Wuh? I never thought of you being so dependent on a man", Miss Ellie explains that she's soooo in love with her husband that she likes being around him as much as possible. She then asks Donna how things with Ray are going, and Donna says that he's visibly changing from the dimwitted yokel she married into a half-Ewing who's obsessed with measuring up to the paternal side of his family. She adds that she has a feeling that their dull-as-fuck marriage may not last forever. Vaughn meets up with an old buddy and oil expert, Lloyd Bettinger, to pick his brain about what he predicts will happen with the price of oil. Lloyd tells him that it's most likely going to rise for the short term, but then dramatically drop within a couple of weeks. Vaughn "hypothetically" asks what someone should do if he were sitting on five million barrels of oil, and Lloyd says that if he couldn't sell it within two weeks, he'd better be prepared to hold onto it for at least a year. Vaughn grins to himself, then calls JR and proposes they get together later. Bobby meets with Jeff Farraday, who tells him he's a former lover of Kristin's, and that her baby was in his custody at the time of her death. He says he has zero desire to take care of the tot and wants Bobby to arrange for him to be reunited with his family, cryptically adding that this "family" is someone he's quite familiar with. Bobby scrunches his face confusedly as he hands Jeff a wad o' cash totalling $2,000, and Jeff hands him a large envelop with copies of checks that Kristin received from Jordan Lee (which...ick). He tells Bobby he'll call him in a few days. Walter Sherr has convened another meeting with Ray and Punk Anderson to discuss the San Antonio housing project, and Punk says he's going to have to decline 'cause he's been summoned to South America to work on the big oil project that Jock was tapped to lead. Ray wishes Punk well, then tells Walter he needs to consider whether or not he has the smarts and/or the dough to enter into this project on his own. JR drops by Afton's apartment and gives her a disgusting new assignment: hit the sheets with an important (aged) banker in exchange for a recording contract, adding "You take care of that banker, and I'll take care of you." A few seconds later, Vaughn Leland arrives for what he assumes is a private meeting with JR, but looks pleasantly surprised by the sight of Afton. He asks JR why in blazes he should secure such a huge loan for him, so JR promises a lucrative finder's fee and "other perks" ... and says that last thing while motioning over at Afton (which...ick). Vaughn perks up at the prospect of a naked romp with the buxom blonde and happily retorts, "We have a deal!", leaving Afton looking less than thrilled about JR pimping her out to this smarmy fossil. Sue Ellen is horseback riding when she comes upon Clayton standing in a field, staring into space. When she asks him whassup, he motions towards a building and tells her that Dusty was born in the ranch hands' house over yonder, and that he tore down the house he shared with his wife 'cause he couldn't bear to live there after she had died inside of it (from illness) while he was away on business. Sue Ellen clucks sympathetically and says, if it cheers him up, she's sooooo in love with Dusty...and Clayton says she's the best thing to happen to him, and that a man needs someone to care for. Rebecca and Katherine drop by Cliff's office so that Katherine can say goodbye before heading back to New York. She says she feels kinda bad about not staying to support Pam, then makes a weird remark about what a swoony hunk Bobby is. As Cliff tries not to retch in his mouth about being continually irritated about a Barnes being married to a Ewing, Katherine glances around the office and asks her brother what happened to the antique cabinet her father once had, so Cliff tells her he had it put in storage when the office was redecorated. Katherine looks visibly miffed that he took it upon himself to make decor changes in her father's office and murmurs about how the antique cabinet always seemed to belong there...then shakes it off and brusquely tells Rebecca that they need to head to the airport now. JR admonishes Franklin Horner for dragging his feet on finalizing his loan request, but Franklin says he needs confirmation from Vaughn Leland before he can sign off on the $200 million loan. Pam tells Dr. Conrad she feels as though she's wasting her time at Brooktree, and is now whitewashing her suicide attempt as her just being in a terrible mood that day. She concedes that it may have had something to do with John Ross no longer needing her love and care now that he's at Southern Cross with Sue Ellen...then hastily adds that returning him to his mother was the right thing to do. She mutely contemplates her own statement for a few seconds before spacily lamenting, "No one ever did that for me", then explains to Dr. Conrad that for years she thought her mother was dead, and only learned that she was still among the living after hiring an investigator to look into it. Dr. Conrad looks intrigued by the tale and asks her how she feels at this very moment, so Pam says she thought that finding her mother would ease her loneliness, but has determined that she continues to feel empty. She adds that she highly doubts she'd feel this empty if she had a child of her own to love and care fore...and if that's impossible, she truly doesn't see the point of living. Bobby tries to get in touch with Jordan Lee - but in vain, 'cause he can't get past the stonewalling from Lee's secretary. Lucy and a guy pal named Scott arrive at a house party thrown by their friend, Sandy Waring. Another partygoer, Beth, rushes over to say hey...and when Scott ambles off to get them some drinks, Lucy is shocked when she sees that Mitch is in attendance at the party, amiably chatting it up with Frank Waring. She sashays over, just as Mitch is telling Frank that he's beginning to warm to the idea of specializing in plastic surgery. Frank greets Lucy and wanders off...and Lucy tells Mitch she's pleasantly surprised, while deeply mystified, that he knows the wealthy doctor. Mitch explains that he's considering interning at Frank's hospital, a decision that will keep him in Dallas - but then emphasizes that he'll still never be as rich as the Ewings, even if he does opt for a more lucrative speciality. Lucy pretends as though money suddenly doesn't matter to her and tells him that all she cares about is getting back together...'cause I guess being married to a future renowned plastic surgeon seems way more impressive than being the wife of a lowly medical researcher. Over at Casa Yokel, Ray is tapping numbers on his calculator and looking dismayed...and when Donna asks him whassup, he tells her he's trying to figure out whether or not he should enter into a development project with Walter Sherr. Donna asks if she can help, then expresses yet again that she's not wild about losing the cowboy simpleton she thought she married. Ray says he actually enjoys all the "wheelin' and dealin'" 'cause it makes him feel less yokelly, and Donna assures him that she doesn't want him to fail...and to that end, proposes that she come in on the deal as a silent partner. Ray weakly points out that marriage and business don't mix - but when Donna points out that she considers her money [all of it earned by her late rich husband] their money, he agrees. Miss Ellie arrives at Southern Cross by chopper...and Sue Ellen and Clayton happily greet her and steer her over to the gazebo so they can all have a seat and share her joyous visit with John Ross. A few seconds later, Dusty pulls Clayton aside to tell him that the Galveston refinery hasn't received its expected shipment of crude oil, and for some odd reason he can't get answers from the distributor. Clayton furrows his brows and says they need that oil shipment asap, and that he's going to look into what the problem is. Vaughn Leland drops by Ewing Oil to deliver the loan papers to JR. JR chortles delightedly and asks him how he's getting [it] on with Afton, so Vaughn says she's gorgeous, though a bit cool with him, and JR's like, "Hmm...that's surprising" and assures him she'll warm to him eventually. JR begins signing the loan papers and remarks on how confident he is that the price of oil will continue to rise indefinitely, 'cause it'd really suck if he were stuck with five million barrels of oil he can't unload. He adds that if he weren't able to make the payments, it would mean that the Houston bank that Vaughn works for would, in essence, own Ewing Oil...and Vaughn's just like, "Oh? Is that a fact?" and chuckles to himself as he watches JR continues to sign the loan papers and seal his self-inflicted fate. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! Recap: Sue Ellen and Dusty make their triumphant return to Southern Cross after the custody hearing that went in Sue Ellen's favor. Sue Ellen kisses Dusty and happily says it feels as though an enormous weight has been lifted from her, then rushes up to John Ross's nursery to cuddle him and declare that no one is ever going to take him away from her. JR is on the phone with Jock, assuring his daddy that he has a plan to get John Ross back onto Southfork. He details his nefarious (but precarious sounding) plan, which entails buying up every drop of oil from local refineries and then making a deal with Clayton/Dusty to sell them the oil in exchange for returning John Ross to Southfork, grimly adding that Sue Ellen's presence at the ranch is optional...even though Miss Ellie seemed pretty stern during the previous episode about how she didn't want the tot back at Southfork without his mother to take care him of him. Jock's like 'sounds good to me!' and seems totes A-OK with JR moving ahead with his insanity-laden scheme. Over at The Store, Bobby is talking to Pam's co-workers as they scratch their heads confusedly about where she could have possibly disappeared to. A police detective is also present, listening in on the conversation and taking notes, and Bobby tells him that he and his wife have no secrets from each other and that he can only assume something is very wrong. The detective tells him that the Dallas police force is handling this as a special case 'cause of the Ewings' wealth and power, and assures him that every patrol car is out looking for Pam [I guess in lieu of directing any of their resources towards any other crimes or law enforcement issues associated with the city's non-wealthy residents]. While lunching out, Katherine is gabbling to Cliff and Rebecca about her New York based TV career and that she currently has no time for a man in her life. She then turns her attention to Cliff and asks him about his life, so he tells her that up until recently he was enmeshed in politics [and constantly trying to even the score with the Ewings] - and Rebecca jumps in and proudly announces that she just appointed Cliff as the new CEO of Wentworth Tool & Die. Katherine looks visibly miffed by that news and remarks on how Wentworth Tool & Die was her daddy's first and most beloved company, and Rebecca breezily retorts that the late Herbert would, no doubt, be happy to hear that she tapped her long lost son to take over the reins of the family business. JR summons Sly and Phyllis to his office to order them to drop everything so they can look into 1) the refineries that are owned by the Farlow clan, and 2) which companies supply oil to those refineries. Bobby has returned to his senate office and continues to worriedly wring his hands about Pam's disappearance. He receives a call from the police detective, assuring him he'll keep him informed about any new developments in The Case of the Missing Rich Ewing Wife. Over lunch, Afton tells Mitch he's a dumbass for turning down Frank Waring's $5,000 check for Heimlich-ing his wife - but Mitch argues that it would have been unethical of him to have accepted the cash, not least 'cause he took an oath to help people whenever they might require medical intervention. Afton grumbles about him being satisfied with living in poverty for the rest of his life, and Mitch somehow refrains from pointing out that, he's a fucking doctor now and is therefore not likely to struggle for cash in the long term and informs his sister that Frank Waring has summoned him for a second meeting that he's strongly considering attending. Bobby gets a call that Pam has finally been located - but when the detective gives him further details, he pales, is all, "OMG!", and rushes out of his office. A crowd has gathered around a tall building to gawk up at Pam, who's standing atop the roof and looking as if she might leap to her death at any moment. Bobby arrives a few seconds later and races into the building and up to the roof, where two policeman are uselessly standing several feet away from Pam. Bobby's all, "Pam! Don't jump!" then implores her to turn around while doing her best to not lean backwards, and she cries, "Nooooooo!!" as he runs towards her and catches her before she's able to slip off the ledge. He then kneels down and cradles her in his arms, assuring her that everything is going to be OK. At Southfork, Lucy is gabbling at Miss Ellie about her separation from Mitch when Bobby calls to inform his mother that Pam nearly leaped off a tall building, adding that she's currently chillin' at Dallas Memorial. Miss Ellie's all, "Ack!" and says that she (and Lucy) will be right there. Bobby is sitting by Pam's bedside when Miss Ellie and Lucy arrive at Dallas Memorial. Bobby tells them it's pretty clear that Pam requires psychiatric care...and that Dr. Danvers has recommended she be checked into a special mental hospital called Brooktree, aka a local facility that's run by a highly regarded psychiatric physician named Dr. Dagmara Conrad. Sly presents JR with the information he requested about the various refineries that supply oil to the Farlow clan and notes how much he seems to be enjoying the underhandedness of hogging the entire Texas oil supply. JR replies, "Whatever makes my daddy happy makes me happy" and agrees that, yep, he definitely does enjoy scheming as a means of forcing the Farlows to dump Sue Ellen so that she'll have no choice but to sheepishly return to Southfork with John Ross - and somehow fails to take into consideration that, since Judge Packer ruled that she's now going to be receiving $6,000 from him for monthly spousal/child support, she's not exactly without alternate housing options. The next morning, Bobby heads back to the hospital to check in on Pam, while Miss Ellie telephones Rebecca to ask her if she wants to meet up...and Rebecca says she'd loooooove for the two of them to get together and catch up. Back at Southern Cross, Sue Ellen sashays over to the pool and is enjoying a morning swim when Dusty limps over with Clayton, who applauds his progress as he continues to recover from his physical injuries. Sue Ellen's all, "Come in, the water's fine!", then pulls him into the pool, and the two smoochingly chuckle while Clayton nods approvingly at their PDA. JR is meeting with an oil distributor in Houston, who tells him he's willing to ship him all the oil he'd normally allocate to Clayton Farlow. He remarks on how pissed off Clayton is going to be when his regular shipment fails to arrive with zero explanation, and a chuckling JR's like, "Heh. No shit" and urges him to keep mum about his hare-brained scheme. Pam is sitting up in her hospital bed, looking as despondent as she's been looking during the last few episodes. Dr. Conrad enters the room and asks her how she's feeling, and she sadly mutters, "Like nothing matters" and admits that she's been feeling empty for a long time...maybe even as far back as when her mother abandoned her as a baby. She tears up and cries, "I have these feelings, and I don't know why!", and Dr. Conrad says she hopes they can put their heads together and figure it all out. Miss Ellie and Rebecca are strolling in a park, commiserating about Pam's deteriorating mental state. Rebecca sheepishly says she knows that abandoning her daughter all those years ago is at the root of her mental anguish, and Miss Ellie's like, "Well d'yuh", but delicately assures her that Pam is in good hands with Dr. Conrad...and that she's keeping her fingers crossed that she can work through whatever deep-seated angst is plaguing her to the point of wanting to leap off of a tall building. During a consultation at Brooktree Hospital, Dr. Conrad tells Bobby that her first order of business is to figure out why Pam is filled with so much self-hatred...and to that end, she strongly advises that Pam check herself into the hospital voluntarily so she can focus solely on examining her troubled feelings. Bobby breezily says he thinks that all Pam really needs is a baby to take care of - but Dr. Conrad points out that his wife's desperate need for a child is a symptom of deeper problems, and that a baby probably shouldn't be burdened with the job of fulfilling its mother's need to be loved. Bobby chews on those words of wisdom for a few seconds, then promises to discuss with Pam the urgent need to voluntarily commit herself. Mitch tells Frank Waring that he intends to devote his professional life to research, and that he's never given too much of a hoot about earning vast sums of money. Frank asks him if he's ever considered specializing in plastic surgery...and when Mitch makes a 'seriously?' face, Frank hastily explains that the field is not limited to frivolous surgeries like nose jobs and boob lifts, but rather about offering a better quality of life to burn victims and disfigured people. He tells Mitch he'd love to sponsor him as an intern at his hospital, and Mitch mulls that over and promises to reconsider his specialty. Miss Ellie is about to climb into a cab when Cliff and Katherine arrive in front of Rebecca's building and wander over so that Cliff can say hey, and Katherine can get introduced to the Ewing matriarch. Miss Ellie exchanges quick pleasantries with the two, then says she has to rush off, leaving Rebecca to fill them in about Pam's meltdown. Bobby returns to Southfork with a still-spacey looking Pam, and she ambles into the house and upstairs to their bedroom. JR meets with his banker, Franklin Horner, to set up a series of 90 day loans totalling around $200 million. Franklin scrunches his face worriedly and says that he doesn't think his bank can cover such a huge loan, and JR breezily says he has lots of collateral he can put up. After a long snooze, Pam wakes up and finds Bobby sitting across the room in a chair, staring worriedly at her. She apologizes for causing him stress by nearly jumping off a building, and he tells her that after talking to Dr. Conrad, he thinks she needs to voluntarily commit herself to Brooktree. Pam shuts her eyes and murmurs, "I'm tired", but then half-heartedly agrees to consider getting some desperately needed psychiatric care. JR continues to meet with various oil distributors, who collectively agree to withhold shipments to anyone but him [which kinda seems bad for business, but whatevs], to the tune of five million barrels of oil. Bobby gets a letter addressed to his office that contains a photo of Kristin and her spawn, and the anonymous sender includes in the note that he'll call him at noon with additional information. At the Cattlemen's Club, Ray and Punk Anderson are meeting with a real estate developer named Walter Sherr to discuss launching a new housing project in San Antonio. Ray says he's not sure if he can offer financing for that 'cause he currently has a lot of other commitments, and Punk says he needs time to think over if he really truly wants to get involved in a brand new venture. At noon, the anonymous letter sender (Jeff Farraday) calls Bobby from a pay phone to tell him that the baby in the photo is named Christopher Shepard, and that if he wants to know any more than that, it's going to cost him $2,000. JR phones Jock to tell him he has all of the oil distributors locked up, then gets another call with a commitment to ship an additional 100K barrels. Yeesh, sounds like he's going to be saddled with a crazy amount of oil. JR assures Jock that it's simply a matter of time before Operation Hoard Texas's Oil Supply pays off and John Ross is safely back at Southfork...and when Jock expresses his concern about the price of oil dropping and possibly bankrupting Ewing Oil, JR laughing assures him he's confident that oil will continue to rise in value indefinitely. Sue Ellen tells Clayton she's grateful to him for allowing her to crash at his ranch, and he says he's more than happy to help out the love of his son's life, then tells her that Dusty is in the projection room. A puzzled Sue Ellen ambles down the hall and finds Dusty watching old film footage of himself bronc riding at a rodeo. He hastily turns off the projector when he sees that she's entered the room...and after she weakly insists that one day he'll be able to ride like that again, he hastily changes the subject and invites her to join him for a walk and gaze up at the stars. Pam arrives at Brooktree (with Bobby) to check herself in. Bobby asks Dr. Conrad how long his wife's treatment is going to take, and adds that he heard about medicines that can help speed up the mental health recovery process. Dr. Conrad explains to the numb-brain that she wants to help Pam find the root cause of her anguish, not simply treat the symptoms...and Bobby chews on that for a few seconds before kissing Pam goodbye. She blankly responds, "Bye" and wanders into the hospital with Dr. Conrad, leaving Bobby staring worriedly after her. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! Recap: After returning to Southfork following JR's failed attempt to abduct John Ross from the Southern Cross ranch, a furious Miss Ellie rails at her eldest son for using her love for her grandson to try to manipulate her into doing something illegal, then admonishes him for frequently using people to achieve his aims. JR responds by whining about how desperate he is to extract his son from Southern Cross, where his mother is living in sin with a cowboy who can hardly walk, and return him to his rightful home...and when Miss Ellie asks why Sue Ellen would prefer a crippled cowboy to him, he just kind of shrugs and breezily assumes it's 'cause she's crazy. Miss Ellie tells him she doesn't approve of John Ross living at Southfork without his mother 'cause she's correctly assuming that JR would fob off the day-to-day parenting of the child to a nanny and/or other family members. JR's like, "Well d'yuh" and then comes right out and says he figured that she and Jock could step up and raise him, much like they raised Lucy...and says this as though their horrible parenting skills didn't turn the obnoxious imp into an over-indulged monster. Miss Ellie nixes the idea of raising a second grandchild, then shoots JR a long stink-eye and says, "I saw a part of you I didn't like very much today", makes clear that she has zero tolerance for his underhanded shit, and declares that she's going to take it upon herself to keep him in line as long as Jock is out of town [which, unbeknownst to her, is now a sad, permanent reality]. Lawyer friend Jack tells Bobby that an adoption is out of the question right now, and Bobby earnestly argues that he's been to every adoption agency in Dallas and is running out of hope for a legal adoption. Jack looks alarmed and warns him to not even think about buying a baby on the black market, not least 'cause the Ewing family is too public a clan to ever be able to hide something as salient as a newly acquired child. He urges Bobby to suck it up and go through the standard waiting period like everyone else, but Bobby's like, "Nooo! I can't wait!" before exiting the office. Over at the Southern Cross ranch, Sue Ellen's lawyer, Arthur Elrod, is discussing with her and Dusty the upcoming custody hearing, which is likely to be put on the court calendar before the end credits roll. After the consultation, Arthur privately tells Sue Ellen that if there's anything particularly sordid in her past that could be used against her in court, he should prolly know about it, and that she can disclose it to him during a private tête-à-tête sometime when Dusty and Clayton aren't around. Bobby arrives at The Store to pick up Pam after work...and when he sees that she's not in her office, Jackie tells him she went up to the third floor (where all the baby stuff is). A few seconds later, Bobby finds Pam staring catatonically at a wind-up toy and spacily muttering about how the new cribs have arrived at The Store...and he's like 'oh fer fuuuuuuuck's sake' [sorry, that was me, projecting] and tells her it's time to go home now. Arthur Elrod arrives at the courthouse to schedule a court date with with JR's lawyer, Howard Barker, and is surprised to see that JR has accompanied him on this boring errand. JR manages to say with a straight face that he tagged along 'cause he wanted to see exactly how the wheels of justice turn, then visibly perks up when he learns that Judge Bill Packer has been selected to preside over his custody case. Howard warns JR that, as an officer of the court, he wouldn't look too kindly on him doing anything to influence Judge Packer, but JR just chuckles and assures him that Packer is far too honest a man to be swayed into demonstrating any kind of bias. Cliff admires his fancy new office at Wentworth Tool & Dye headquarters and tells a beaming Rebecca that suddenly being appointed CEO is going to take some getting used to. He then sits at his large desk and fiddles with the phone, which results in him accidentally buzzing his secretary, Marie. Rebecca tells Cliff she's going leave him to his work and heads out...and a few seconds later, Cliff summons Marie, for real this time, and asks her to help schedule a meeting with the company's comptroller, Mr. Forest, so that they can comb through the company's books and see whassup with the finances. Downtown, Punk Anderson hands Ray two checks: one for the original $3 million he borrowed from Donna to invest in the Lubbock housing project, and another for his first payout of $100,000. After Punk and Pat Powers amble off, Ray hands Donna the $3 million check with a thanks for the loan, then says he's going to use his 100K payout to open what he calls "a development account". When Donna wearily asks what that is, he happily says it'll be "ready money" he can use whenever a good deal comes up, adding that he's sooooo happy to have his own pot of money, 'cause having to dip into his wife's savings to make an investment with Punk was pretty humiliating. Donna reacts by staring back at him with a combination of irritation and concern, instead of lightening up, untying the knot in her panties, and just being happy that this housing investment resulted in a nice cash windfall for her husband, who seems super excited to be accumulating his own wealth for the first time in his life. Sue Ellen summons Arthur Elrod to Southern Cross while Dusty and Clayton are in town so that she can reveal all of the unflattering behavior she's exhibited in past seasons that JR and his lawyer could use as mudslinging fodder during the custody hearing:
She snarlingly adds that JR has hit the sheets with every willing and available woman in Dallas - including her own sister - and that she's far more fit to parent John Ross. Arthur tells her that she and JR exchanging insults isn't going to be helpful during the custody hearing, then points out that, at the end of the day, she's a privileged wife who cheated on her rich and powerful husband...and that since Texas is "the last bastion of male chauvinism", he can't be 100% confident that the judge will rule in her favor. Pam laments to Bobby how increasingly hopeless she's feeling about not getting a baby in the near future - but Bobby half-heartedly argues that there's lots of hope with the various adoption agencies they've been in contact with, then suggests she see a psychiatrist about her neverending 'I wanna baby!' depression. Pam's just like 'meh' 'bout that last thing, and says that talking to a mental health professional isn't going to change the sad reality that they're never going to have a biological child (or a short enough wait for an adopted one). JR arrives at the Doubletree Hotel restaurant with Afton and looks faux surprised when he sees that Judge Bill Packer is there, lunching alone. An unsuspecting Judge Packer looks delighted to see JR, and is openly smitten with Afton when JR introduces her. JR starts nattering to him about a lucrative business opportunity he'd like to bring him in on - a brazenly sketchy move for all parties concerned, so it's unclear why Judge Packer gets so excited about it - and then JR gets a pretend call (from Sly) so he can fib to Judge Packer that he has to leave because of a sudden emergency, and hopes he wouldn't mind seeing that his buxom friend Afton gets home safely. Hmm hmm.. While meeting with the very strange Mr. Forest, Cliff is intrigued to learn that Wentworth Tool & Die is just one of several companies under the umbrella of Wentworth Industries...and that, compared to Wentworth Mining, Wentworth Natural Gas, and Wentworth Machine Parts, it's pretty small potatoes. He asks Mr. Forest why he's never heard of these companies, and Mr. Forest is like, "Dunno", then adds that the late Herbert Wentworth generally liked to keep a low profile. Afton is performing in the Stardrift Lounge - and, as is usual whenever there's footage of her singing in this ugly dive, her crooning goes on for what seems like a really loooooooong fuckin' time. When she sees that JR has entered the restaurant, she takes a break and sashays over to the bar to say hey. He grins lasciviously and asks her how it went with Judge Packer, and she tells him that they just sat around chatting in the hotel restaurant until he called her a cab. She then complains about how tired she is of singing in this decrepit shit-box night after night and wants something more lucrative, but JR snarls, "After today, you're lucky to be working at all. I only pay off on results" and storms out. Mitch, who has witnessed the exchange from across the room, wanders over to his sister and tells her it sickens him to think of her and JR coupling up for whatever unholy reason they've joined forces, and she growls at him to leave her the hell alone. Elsewhere in the Stardrift Lounge, a woman sitting at a table with her friends starts choking on a chicken bone, and Mitch rushes over and administers the Heimlich manoeuvre. When the woman spits out the chicken bone and resumes breathing, her friends thank Mitch for saving her life, and Afton makes it a point to tell everyone at the table that their friend's saviour's name is Mitch Cooper. Bobby finds Pam laying despondently atop their bed...and when he pokes at her to tell her some positive news about a possible adoption, she remains limply catatonic. He quickly gets on the phone and calls Dr. Danvers, imploring him to make a house call to Southfork asap. After the commercial break, Dr. Danvers tells Bobby (along with Miss Ellie, Donna, and Ray) that he gave Pam a mild sedative, and that her laying in a catatonic state problems are emotional, not physical. He recommends that she continue with her normal activities, and that a renewed enthusiasm for her job might help improve her general mood. Over another home-cooked dinner, Cliff asks Rebecca why she didn't tell him she owned the little known (yet extremely profitable) conglomerate, Wentworth Industries. She sheepishly tells him she was afraid to reveal too soon that she's a very rich widow 'cause she wanted him to love her for her...and Cliff chews on that for a few seconds and says it's just as well, given that he's been blinded by money all his life and has made boneheaded decisions as a result. He then promises to run Wentworth Tool & Die to the best of his abilities and to squash his every impulse in moving too far too fast. Afton drops by Mitch's condo to tell him that the husband of the woman he saved from choking, Frank Waring, wants to meet with him to personally thank him for his lifesaving actions. When Mitch hems and haws about not wanting/needing to be thanked, Afton says she noticed that Mrs.Waring was wearing some pretty valuable looking jewelry, and that being thanked by a rich man could only be a good thing. She hands him a piece of paper with an address on it and says she took the liberty of arranging a meeting 'cause she knew he'd hem and haw about setting one up himself, then hugs him and recommends that he wear something nice. Miss Ellie is breakfasting on the Southfork patio when JR cheerily mentions that he's looking to get Judge Bill Packer, who's presiding over his custody case, interested in a contrived, mutually-beneficial business deal. Miss Ellie wonders aloud if that's legal [doubtful - but at the very least, I'm sure it'd be sternly frowned upon by the Dallas Bar Association] as JR rushes off to work. A few seconds later, Bobby and Pam amble towards the patio to say hey to Miss Ellie, and Pam says she's so embarrassed about her catatonic state last night, then vows to put all of her energy into her day job to make up for her recent slacking. Miss Ellie blandly says she really just cares that she's OK now, and a relieved looking Bobby offers to drive Pam to the office, then pick her up at the end of the day and treat her to dinner in the city. Mitch arrives at Dr. Frank Waring's swanky estate and is ushered by the maid to the spacious backyard, where Frank and his wife Beverly are having breakfast. Frank thanks Mitch for saving his wife's life and hands him a check for $5,000 as a gesture of appreciation - but Mitch refuses to accept it, then explains that he just graduated from medical school and is hoping to specialize in research. Frank looks intrigued by the young man's chosen career path and says he'd loooove to further discuss this area of medicine with him at a future date. That evening, JR tells Miss Ellie he hopes to soon have Judge Bill Packer in his hip pocket after bringing him in on a lucrative business deal...and says this as though she didn't just chide him at the beginning of the episode for the shitty way he's always using people for his own nefarious purposes. A few seconds later, Howard Barker calls to inform JR that the custody hearing has been scheduled for tomorrow, and JR frowns unhappily at that news. At breakfast the next morning, Miss Ellie forbids JR to sling mud at Sue Ellen in court, and JR whines about how miffed he is that he doesn't have more time "to work on Judge Packer" - then agrees that, yeah, he'd prefer his young son not find out what a tramp his mother is. He chides Pam once again for helping Sue Ellen abduct his son and snarls at her to mind her own bidness, and Bobby growls at him to shut it...then stares concernedly after Pam when she spacily heads off to work. Cliff and Rebecca are about to drive off somewhere when a cab pulls up to the apartment building and an attractive young woman climbs out and yoo hoos at Rebecca. Rebecca rushes over and greets her happily, then ushers her over to where Cliff's standing and introduces her as his half-sister, Katherine...and the two half-siblings grin at each other. Custody hearing! Howard Barker tells the judge that JR simply wants his son raised in a wholesome environment, insisting that Sue Ellen abandoned her husband and is exposing the tot to immoral conditions at the Southern Cross ranch. Arthur Elrod interjects to inform the judge that there's nothing immoral going on between Sue Ellen and Dusty, on account of the two have separate living quarters and have not engaged in any clothes-less hanky panky since her arrival at the estate. Arthur says he can provide depositions from servants corroborating that claim, along with medical records from several highly regarded doctors...and when Judge Packer is all, "Wuh? Doctors?", Arthur pauses to glance over at Sue Ellen, who glances over at Dusty, who curtly nods to give Arthur the green light to proceed with his bombshell statement. Arthur explains to Judge Packer that Dusty was recently in a terrible plane crash that resulted in some below-the-waist injuries that preclude him from walking without the aid of a cane and having the penile ability to knock boots with Sue Ellen. He hands Judge Packer Dusty's medical reports, somberly emphasizing that Sue Ellen's love for Dusty is very pure, pronouncing, "She did not leave her husband for reasons of the flesh." JR's all 'the fuck?' and stares over at Sue Ellen in stunned bewilderment as Judge Packer abruptly calls for a recess so that he can privately determine how Dusty's flaccid member is going to impact his ruling on John Ross's custody. Bobby gets a call from a concerned Jackie, who tells him that no one at The Store has seen Pam in awhile...and that she seemingly disappeared after she went upstairs to Liz's office (but then never arrived). Bobby's all, "Ack!" and says he'll be right over. After the recess, Judge Packer orders JR to issue to Sue Ellen a monthly alimony payment of $5,000, then decrees that John Ross will remain in her custody and that she'll receive an additional $1,000 in child support. A thrilled Sue Ellen shoots Dusty a happy grin, while a visibly miffed JR glares over at her hatefully. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! Recap: Bobby, Ray, and Donna are at the Dallas airport to welcome Miss Ellie home from her European vacay. When they ask why Jock isn't with her, she says he was unexpectedly summoned to D.C. by Dave Culver and someone from the State Department for some unspecified reason. She then changes the subject to whassup with John Ross...and when Bobby tells her that Sue Ellen took him with her when she moved in with Dusty on the Southern Cross ranch, the matriarch scrunches her face confusedly and says she doesn't get how it was even possible for the child to be physically removed from his Southfork home. Dusty greets Sue Ellen when she and John Ross return to San Angelo after attending Kristin's funeral in Albuquerque. She tells him that her mother didn't take Kristin's death very well and blamed her for her sister's untimely demise, the logic being that if Sue Ellen hadn't left JR, Kristin wouldn't have shown up at Southfork all high and self-destructive...which I think is highly debatable. Dusty assures her that Kristin's death wasn't her fault, and that Kristin changed for the worse when she began dabbling with PCP, and Sue Ellen responds by whimpering, "Hold me" ... and then gets so amorously carried away during their smoochfest that she momentarily forgets about Dusty's penile impairment. She abruptly pulls away and mutters, "Sorry", which...awkward. Over at Southfork, Miss Ellie and Donna are cooking chilli together while Ray tells Bobby how awesomely things are going with the Lubbock housing project. Miss Ellie smilingly tells Donna that Ray has the makings of a successful businessman, but Donna just kind of shrugs and says she liked him fine when he was a simple ranch hand. A few seconds later, JR returns home and kisses his mama hello, and she informs him that Jock made an unexpected trip to D.C. and that he'll be calling home this evening. Over a home cooked dinner, Cliff tells Rebecca he's thinking seriously of leaving Dallas 'cause, after burning multiple bridges, he's given up all hope of finding decent employment. Rebecca reminds him he has a law degree and lots of experience, but Cliff says that in Dallas a person needs money to make money, something he doesn't have...and Rebecca reacts by mutely staring back at him, her face scrunched concernedly. During dinner at the Southern Cross ranch, Sue Ellen is visibly bored by Dusty's/Clayton's conversation about ranch stuff and asks Dusty if he'd be interested in driving to downtown San Angelo to do something fun. Clayton makes a wuh? face and primly tells her that during the week the Farlows make it a rule to go to bed early and rise early - but Dusty half-heartedly agrees that a mid-week date is a nice idea. A deflated Sue Ellen says she's abruptly changed her mind about wanting to go out and will turn in early after all...then carries John Ross up to his nursery and nuzzles him while staring wistfully into space. Miss Ellie is on the phone with Jock, getting an update on the reason for his D.C. trip, before she hands the phone to JR. She then seats herself at the dining table and informs everyone that Jock told her that the State Department signed an aid agreement with some unnamed South American country in exchange for permitting them to drill for oil...and Jock and a bunch of other Texas oilmen have been tapped to teach the South Americans how to become successful oilmen. [Sounds plausible, sure.] As Bobby, Pam, Donna, and Ray titter about how exciting that is, an ashen-faced JR enters the room and tells everyone that Jock got mightily pissed when he learned that John Ross is living in San Angelo, and that he instructed him to get that boy back onto Southfork, fucking asap. The next day at Ewing Oil, Gerry Macon updates JR on Operation Stalk Sue Ellen, but mostly just complains about how hard it is to get any real intel from Southern Cross, on account of..
JR grimaces at the unhelpful report and tells Gerry he's fired for being basically useless. He then gets on the phone with Detective Harry McSween and tells him to come to his office asap 'cause he needs yet another favor. Lucy returns home and finds Miss Ellie cycling on a stationary bike, 'cause apparently she realized what terrible shape she's in while she was vacationing in Paris. She asks Lucy whassup with her and Mitch these days, and Lucy says, "Not much" and further explains that their differing opinions about money have made them incompatible as husband and wife. Miss Ellie clucks disapprovingly at her granddaughter's dumb life choice to get married so young instead of staying in school - but Lucy breezily says it wouldn't have mattered, 'cause she's pretty sure that she and Mitch would have fought about something else. She laments how Mitch will never be able to afford the kind of luxury lifestyle to which she's become accustomed, especially if - heaven forbid - they were to have children. While ambling together downtown, Rebecca tells Pam she's concerned about Cliff, who's so down on his luck that he's considering leaving Dallas altogether. Pam rolls her eyes and says that Cliff is always blaming his disappointments on Dallas, and that he's a big boy who'll no doubt figure out a way to land on his feet. Rebecca stares back at her with a shocked expression and says it's very uncharacteristic of her to be so unsympathetic towards her brother, so Pam says that these days she's pouring every ounce of energy into being depressed 24/7 over her inability to carry a spawn to term, then wails, "Oh momma! I want a baby soooooooo badly!" JR instructs Detective Harry McSween to travel to San Angelo, team up with a lieutenant friend he has on the local police force, and forcibly remove his son from the Southern Cross ranch and bring him to Southfork. Harry's like 'yeah sure, what could go wrong with me doing that?' and tells JR to "consider it done". Downtown, Bobby is talking to a lawyer friend named Jack about signing adoption papers so that he and Pam can acquire a much needed baby, and Jack assures him that, considering he's a Ewing and a state senator, everything should magically go in his favor. Back at Southfork, JR remarks on how unsurprised he is that Lucy split with Mitch, and assumes she dumped him 'cause of how little earning potential he has a future medical researcher. A few seconds later, Bobby returns home and goes upstairs to check on Pam and finds her laying in bed looking even more despondent than the generally despondent way she's been moping around lately. He coos about how concerned he is that she's so overly bummed about her barrenness, then says he met up with a lawyer friend who arranged for them to meet with an adoption agency tomorrow morning. Pam perks up at that development and tells him she's soooooo happy to get the ball rolling on starting a family. Afton is performing in the Stardrift Lounge, while - elsewhere in the restaurant - Mitch is celebrating his graduation from medical school with his fellow classmates. Afton takes a singing break to give her brother a congratulatory shout-out for his achievement, then sashays over to his table and gets introduced to his classmates. When Afton's boss (Milton) sends a bottle of champagne to the table, Mitch gets all prickly about the gesture and bitchily asks Afton if she's fooling around with him...and says if she is, she could do better. Afton reminds her doltish brother that he's in no position to be giving dating/relationship advice after so stupidly driving Lucy away 'cause of his aversion to rich people, then says that, much like Lucy, she has zero desire to be poor all her life. Mitch insists that he doesn't want to be poor either, but has no idea how to acquire wealth, and Afton tells him it's a simple matter of taking money from the ones who have it. While breakfasting on the patio, Pam tells everyone she's feeling better than she has in awhile 'cause she and Bobby have an appointment with an agency to inquire about adopting a baby. Everyone coos happily - except for JR, who translates their desire for a baby an attempt to replace John Ross, then snarls, "That's all this family needs, another half-breed." Ray takes that remark as a personal insult against his non-Miss-Ellie parentage and angrily springs up from his chair to confront his half-bro - but Donna restrains him while Miss Ellie orders the two idiots to squash their beef. A few seconds later, Punk Anderson arrives at Southfork to gush about how the units in the Lubbock housing project, which were financed by him, Ray, and some guy named Pat, are selling out. JR looks miffed that Ray has a piece of that lucrative real estate investment, and Punk nods proudly and tells Donna she married herself "a real businessman" ... and she reacts by contorting her face in an irked-like expression that makes it clear how unhappy she is with the metamorphosis her simpleton cowboy husband has undergone. Cliff is whining to Rebecca again about his challenge finding gainful, Dallas-based employment, so she says she may have something he could possibly sink his teeth into: she needs his help assessing the profit potential of a small company her late husband left her, then explains that the company produces parts for drilling rigs, and that it's currently being run by a panel of (old white men) trustees. Dusty meets up with Sue Ellen just as she's finishing a horseback ride. He reminisces about how much he used to looooooove riding before the plane crash that rendered him a hobbling eunuch, then says he wishes they had hooked up when he was young and penile-ly intact. Sue Ellen assures him she loves him very much, and that all that truly matters to her is that they're together. The adoption agency lady tells Bobby and Pam that, unfortunately, there's a shortage of available babies, and that the wait could be eighteen months or more. As the two dejectedly shuffle back to their car, Bobby apologizes to Pam for getting her hopes up, but then promises that they'll get their names in at every adoption agency in Dallas. Detective Harry McSween tells JR that, after assessing the situation in San Angelo, there's fuck-all he can do to sneak John Ross off of the Southern Cross ranch, not least 'cause the Farlows are a very powerful clan in San Angelo and have the San Remo sheriff in their pocket - much like the Ewings do with the rotund Braddock County sheriff. JR chews on that for a few seconds, then murmurs that maybe he could try a Trojan Horse type approach. JR returns home, finds Miss Ellie riding her stationary bicycle, and lays it on thick about how much he misses his son and can't help thinking about what the tot is doing these days in San Angelo. Miss Ellie wonders aloud if Sue Ellen would allow her to visit with her grandson, and JR faux brightens at that idea says she probably would, then urges her to call Sue Ellen to find out...and further suggests she take the Ewing chopper over to Southern Cross. Miss Ellie's like, "I'm on it!", then promptly gets on the phone with her daughter-in-law to arrange an impromptu trip to San Angelo. That evening, Pam thrashes around in bed 'cause of a bad dream, and Bobby gently wakes her and urges her to try to fall asleep without being so mentally tortured. In the kitchen, Miss Ellie tells Bobby she's sooooo excited to fly to San Angelo to see John Ross, and Bobby grimaces and remarks on the bad luck she's had with grandchildren. When Miss Ellie reminds him that he and Pam are about to adopt a baby, he tells her there's a two year wait at all of the Dallas adoption agencies, and that he doesn't think Pam can wait that length of time without going squirrelly in the process. The Ewing chopper lands on the Southern Cross ranch, and Miss Ellie climbs out of the aircraft and rushes across the lawn to give John Ross a big hug. Sue Ellen is happy to see her mother-in-law, but soon becomes alarmed when she sees that JR has also made the trip. She stomps over to give him the what-for for using his own mother to get to their son and warns him not to try anything. JR says it's impossible for him to do anything and motions at all of the armed yokels patrolling the grounds...and a few seconds later, a concerned looking Dusty and Clayton wander over to see whassup. Clayton introduces himself to Miss Ellie...and when she tells him she personally thinks that John Ross belongs at Southfork, he says that the young boy belongs wherever his mother is, smugly emphasizing that San Remo is not "Ewing country". JR, meanwhile, offers Sue Ellen a deal: hand over John Ross, and he'll divorce her immediately. Sue Ellen snarlingly declines that ultimatum and tells him that he'll never get full custody of their son. Cliff and Rebecca are holding a meeting with the trustees of Wentworth Tool & Die. Cliff marvels at the ineptitude of the trustees for 1) not seeking to expand their operation, and 2) not more aggressively peddling their equipment supplies. When he flatly says that the company should be doing a lot better than it is, Rebecca decrees that, as of right now, the company is going to be run by family. She politely dismisses the trustees...and after the men file out of the room, Rebecca tells Cliff that she wants him to run the company, a position that will require him to stay in Dallas. Cliff mulls that over for a few seconds, gently chides his mother for being so crafty, but then decides he likes the idea of earning a fat salary and being in charge. Back at Southern Cross, the pilot fires up the Ewing chopper as JR continues to play ball with John Ross. He tosses the ball nearer the helicopter and urges his son to go fetch it, then quickly picks him up, hands him to Miss Ellie, and tells her to make a run for it towards the chopper, assuring her that the armed yokels probably won't shoot her. Miss Ellie makes her way towards the chopper, but then stops and stares bewilderedly at JR and then at Sue Ellen, who's pleading with her to not steal her child...and Dusty and Clayton somehow refrain from telling the armed yokels, who are supposed to function as ranch security but are standing around uselessly, to fucking do something about what's clearly an attempted kidnapping happening in real time. A tortured looking Miss Ellie decides she can't go through with forcibly taking her grandson after all and firmly tells JR, "He may belong on Southfork, but not this way." She then hands the boy back to his teary-eyed mother before scurrying back towards the chopper, while a defeated looking JR sheepishly climbs in after her. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: Inside the Braddock County Courthouse, Cliff is testifying about the night he found Kristin floating face-down in the Southfork swimming pool, insisting that she was dead before his attempted rescue. He says a few seconds after that, he looked up and saw JR standing on a balcony with broken railing...then proceeded to pull Kristin out of the swimming pool and call the local sheriff's station. Sue Ellen arrives at the courthouse with Dusty and Clayton in tow, and the three enter the courtroom in time to hear JR's side of the story. He testifies that Kristin was high as a kite and uncharacteristically disheveled when she arrived at Southfork...and that he had been so distracted about his missing son that he somehow didn't realize that the mood-altered Kristin had wandered onto his balcony, crashed through the railing, and landed in the swimming pool below. He says he's definitely not guilty of doing anything to harm her, as was evidenced by the lie detector test that Sheriff Washburn administered on the night of her death, and the judge interrupts to tut tut him for bringing that up 'cause polygraph results are not admissible in court. Expert witness Dr. Hooper testifies that Kristin hit her head on the edge of the pool when she plunged off the balcony, a blow that rendered her unconscious and lead to her drowning. He adds that she had a shit-ton of PCP (aka angel dust) in her system, a drug with side effects that include lack of coordination, a sense of euphoria, and agitation...in other words, it totally explains why she crashed through the balcony railing without anyone pushing her. Dr. Hooper says he has no problem believing that Kristin is fully responsible for her own death, and - to more convincingly exonerate JR so that the show can move on from the contrived Season 4 "cliffhanger" - it's entirely possible that she was suicidal. As the courtroom spectators look intrigued by that bombshell and begin to titter, the jury goes off to deliberate...then returns in record time with a verdict of accidental death. Texas sure has one speedy justice system. Howard Barker tells JR that, now that Kristin's death storyline has been so nimbly wrapped up, they can focus all of their energy on devising a strategy to reacquire custody of John Ross. Sheriff Washburn interrupts the conversation to sheepishly apologize to JR for "everything I had to put you through" - OMFG - and JR breezily tells him, "No harm done" and cackles about how impressed the jury looked when he snuck into his testimony [the, I'm assuming, fib] that he had passed a lie detector test. He assures Washburn that his law enforcement job in Braddock County is safe, and the rotund sheriff beams at him gratefully while expressing his thanks for not being mad at him. Sue Ellen laments how Kristin ended up being a drug fiend - despite there never being a whiff of her doing any kind of drug in all the time she was on the show - and Bobby and Pam cluck sympathetically at her loss, then urge her to put her sister's death and drug woes firmly behind her, 'cause the writers would much prefer to focus on her imminent divorce and ugly custody battle. JR meets up with Detective Harry McSween outside the courthouse, grumbling about how the authorities tried to pin Kristin's untimely death on him. He then instructs Harry to learn all he can about Sue Ellen's arrangements for Kristin's funeral, in particular any travel plans she has in the works, so that he can plan his next move. The next day, Cliff notices the front page of The Dallas Press, which features the headline 'Southfork Death Ruled Accidental' above photos of himself, JR, and Kristin. A few seconds later, he arrives at Jeremy Wendell's office to discuss his employability at WestStar Oil and gushes about how happy he is to finally meet him, and that he worked closely with Dave Stratton in an attempt to link JR to the Southeast Asian counter-revolution. An unimpressed Jeremy reminds him that JR didn't end up paying the price for that crime, and that he also beat the murder charge he was just in court for. Cliff shrugs apologetically, then informs him that, while working together to bring down JR, Dave Stratton had promised him a position at WestStar, but Jeremy responds by haughtily snarling, "WestStar Oil does not reward losers." Ouch. In the lobby of the Ewing Oil building, JR meets with private investigator Jerry Macon, who agrees to stake out the Southern Cross Ranch and follow Sue Ellen's/their tot's every movement. Over at Southfork, Bobby is swimming [in the pool Kristin died in just a few days before, which...ew] while a spacey looking Pam sits on a lounge chair and stares despondently into space. Bobby remarks on how uncomfortable things were at the courthouse earlier, and Pam nods, mutters, "Poor Kristin..", and says she totally gets how unfulfilled Kristin must have been with her worthless life. Bobby points out that she really can't compare herself to Kristin 'cause she has a way better, more stable life...to which Pam unconvincingly mutters, "I guess so." Bobby stares at her concernedly and says he's worried that her unending desire for a baby has become an obsession. She shrugs and is all, "I can't help it" ... and when Bobby reminds her that it is physically possible for her to have a child, she moans that she can't endure another miscarriage. JR drops by Afton's apartment, barks at her to fix him a drink, then slumps on her couch. She rubs his shoulders to ease his tension, and he thanks her once again for helping him get access to Cliff's documents detailing his role in the South Asian counter-revolution. He says it's nice coming to her place, where he can relax with a drink, then makes it clear he's in no mood for sex 'cause of how irked he continues to be about Sue Ellen taking their son to her boyfriend's ranch in San Angelo. Afton weakly assures him that eventually he'll get John Ross back, then offers to fix him some dinner - but he moodily declines, says he should prolly head home, and abruptly gets up and walks out, leaving a dejected Afton staring unhappily into space. JR arrives at Southfork and peeks into the empty nursery with his sad face on. Later, he calls Miss Ellie in Paris to break the bad news of Kristin's untimely demise...and then, off-camera, fills her in about Sue Ellen and John Ross leaving Southfork to shack up with Dusty Farlow. Sue Ellen, Dusty, and Clayton are ferried back to the Southern Cross ranch by stretch limo. Sue Ellen wanders over to the pasture fence and stares sadly into the distance as she tells Dusty that the full weight of her sister's tragic death is just hitting her now, and that she blames their controlling mother for pushing them into fulfilling all of the things in life - e.g. wealth, status - that she was never able to achieve. She deduces that 1) Kristin was so bummed by her life's failure that she abruptly turned to drugs to numb the pain, and 2) her mother's relentless pressure could explain why she herself turned to booze to cope with her unhappy marriage to JR. Dusty clucks sympathetically, then offers to travel to Albuquerque with her to attend Kristin's funeral, but she gives him a hard no on that and says she hasn't yet explained his presence in her life to her mama and thinks it's best if she and John Ross travel alone to bid her druggie/suicidal (?) sister a final farewell. At Ewing Oil, JR is interviewing an attractive woman named Heather for the secretarial position, but when she admits to having zero typing or shorthand skills and really only has her ample cleavage to offer, he tells her they only hire attractive women who have superior secretarial skills. She shrugs at that and sashays out, and JR buzzes Phyllis to ask her to bring in the next applicant...and instructs her to keep Heather's contact info on file in case he's ever interested in a random booty call with a woman who's clearly willing and eager to put out. The next applicant is an attractive, confident blonde named Sylvia (her friends call her Sly), who tells JR that she has lots of experience working with independent oil companies and can type 90 words a minute and write 120 words in shorthand...and when JR is interrupted by Phyllis, who needlessly passes along a phone message from Detective Harry McSween, Sly gaily tells him that her dad and Harry are such great friends that she refers to the detective as Uncle Harry. JR nods approvingly at her good looks, solid secretarial credentials, and personal connections to local law enforcement and happily says, "Well, Sly. Welcome to Ewing Oil!" and shakes her hand. As Ray and Donna shop around for a new saddle, Ray, who continues to be buoyed by his recent success as a real estate developer, insists on buying her the most expensive one. Donna argues that she doesn't need anything super fancy - but he insists that since she's going to be on horseback during in a parade in Braddock County, as well as some charity thing in Plano, she should be sitting atop the most luxurious saddle available. Over lunch with Rebecca, Cliff grumbles about how shittily his job hunting has been going, lamenting that no one wants to hire him after his latest legal skirmish with the Ewings. Rebecca reminds him that he has a law degree and would do well to put his grudges with the Ewings behind him, citing that that kind of simmering hatred ruined Digger's life - but Cliff reminds her that, for whatever God-only-knows-why reason, the writers seem very invested in keeping the tedious Barnes vs. Ewings Feud alive for all eternity. Ray and Donna run into Punk Anderson while shopping, and he gabbles about how awesomely the Lubbock housing project is going, gushing that the units are selling like hotcakes. He credits Ray for having "the Midas touch", then invites the two to jet with him to Lubbock this afternoon to check in on the development in person. Detective Harry McSween reports to JR that Kristin's corpse is scheduled to be transported to Albuquerque in two days, and that Sue Ellen and John Ross are booked on the same flight. JR thanks him and says he'll take care of the rest. Bobby drops by The Store to say hey to Pam, but soon learns that she made an impromptu trip to San Angelo to visit Sue Ellen and her tot. Bobby scrunches his face all irked-like and gets on the phone with the Ewing pilot, ordering him to gas up the chopper so he can fly over to the Southern Cross Ranch asap and fetch his errant wife. Cliff arrives at Afton's building and manages to catch her in the parking lot before she heads off to work. He invites her to join him lunch, but she tells him she's too busy, pretty much forever, then chides him for using her to learn whatever intel she may have had regarding JR's involvement in the South Asian counter-revolution. She tells him she read all about what he tried to do to his arch-nemesis during the hearing in Austin, then snarlingly calls him a loser and says she has no room in her life for losers. Ouch again. Over at the Southern Cross Ranch, Pam happily visits with John Ross and asks Sue Ellen if there's anything she can do to further accommodate her rich-man-funded life of leisure. Sue Ellen says she's getting all the emotional support she needs from Dusty, who's far sweeter and more loving than JR could ever hope to be, and Pam clucks sadly about how sorry she is that she had to leave Southfork to find her happy place...and says this as though it's not blatantly obvious that any Ewing spouse (ex or otherwise) would be immeasurably happier after moving far, far away from that wretched cesspool of a ranch. Jerry Macon updates JR from his car phone on Operation Stalk Sue Ellen and reports that Pam is currently visiting his soon-to-be ex-wife on Southern Cross. JR irritably wonders aloud what she's up to now, then says he wants to know the details of his wife's Albuquerque travel plans pronto. Bobby's chopper lands on the Southern Cross ranch - just as Pam is about to put John Ross down for his nap. As Dusty and Clayton emerge from the house to see which Ewing decided to drop in uninvited, Bobby amiably waves at them and says he's only here to pick up his wife. He then chides Pam for not telling him about her plans to travel to San Angelo...and she just kind of shrugs and is all, "Whatever" before carrying John Ross inside. Bobby seats himself next to Sue Ellen and gives her the what-for for using Pam to sneak her son away from JR, and Sue Ellen insists that she had no other recourse...and, frankly, didn't have to do a whole lot of convincing to get Pam to help her out. After Bobby chews on that for a few seconds, the two agree that Pam is annoyingly desperate to have a baby, and ponder the possibility of adopting a child. Back at Southfork, Donna and Lucy are horseback riding together and discussing their shared dilemma of being married to men who are monetarily inferior to them. Donna says she much preferred it when Ray was just a simple-brained cowboy, not the savvy "wheeler and dealer" we're supposed to believe he's suddenly become. She tells Lucy that money isn't the solution to a loving relationship, and Lucy looks doubtful 'bout that and says she's still somewhat half-hearted about not wanting to give up on Mitch. Howard Barker drops by Ewing Oil to report that he received word from Sue Ellen's lawyer regarding scheduling a preliminary hearing for temporary alimony and custody. JR says he's bracing himself for the nasty fight ahead, and Howard warns that if he doesn't get John Ross back at Southfork by any means necessary before the hearing, he may never regain custody of the tot...which seems like odd, somewhat nonsensical advice for an officer of the court to be giving to his client - but then I'm a recapper, not a family law expert from fictional 1980s Texas. The next morning, JR finds Marilee Stone waiting for him in his office for seemingly no other purpose than to invite him to lunch 'cause she figures he's got to be lonely without Sue Ellen around. He declines 'cause he has meetings all day, but then agrees to have dinner with her tomorrow night. He tells her that tomorrow he'll definitely be in the mood to celebrate getting something back that belongs to him (though: not). At Southfork, Bobby gets off the phone with Jock and tells JR that their parents are planning to cut their vacation short and are scheduled to return home in a couple of days. He makes it a point to mention to JR that Miss Ellie was particularly worried about John Ross no longer living at Southfork, and JR snarls that that's largely due to the stupidity of his wife - just as Pam enters the room with a shopping bag filled with goodies for John Ross. JR snappishly tells her his son has everything he needs and doesn't need anything from "his demented aunt" ... and a few minutes later, Ray and Donna arrive to go out to dinner with Bobby and Pam. Bobby sheepishly tells Pam he forgot to mention making special dinner plans for the four of them, and she just kind of shrugs and spacily says she's A-OK with a double-date dinner with the two dullards. JR gets a call from Gerry Macon detailing Sue Ellen's plans to attend her sister's funeral in Albuquerque tomorrow. The following morning, Sue Ellen and John Ross are transported to Love Field airport by chopper...and once they enter the airport, they encounter two of JR's goons: one grabs the tot, while the other subdues Sue Ellen. As Sue Ellen's all, "Nooooo!! Help!!", Dusty and a posse of his burly ranch hands suddenly appear, take control of the situation, and return John Ross to his mother. Dusty explains to Sue Ellen that he figured JR would try something sinister like this, and that he's also arranged for a security team to meet her at the Albuquerque airport, just in case. The two then look up and notice that a visibly miffed JR is inside the airport, glaring down at them from the second floor landing. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! |
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