Recap: JR is on the phone with someone named Chester, barking at him to get him the videotape of a specific TV show, telling him he needs it asap.
At Southfork, Bobby tells Miss Ellie that the upcoming hearing to get temporary custody of Christopher is considered very routine in the legal world - but Miss Ellie points out that Pam isn't likely to think of it as routine. The two then go outside to the pool area, where Lucy and Pam are doing a stretching routine wearing skintight '80s exercise leotards...and when Lucy tries to get Miss Ellie interested in joining their workout, she gives that a hard no and says she'll stick to her bicycle. JR emerges from the house, ogles Pam and Lucy in their skimpy wear as he remarks, "The sight of you ladies is enough to snap a man's eyes open in the morning", then asks his mama if she wouldn't mind looking after John Ross, 'cause he has a few errands to run.
Ray is once again looking drunk and disheveled when JR drops by Casa Yokel. He chuckles at Ray's bedraggled state, sarcastically asks him if he's running Southfork by phone these days, then pours himself a drink while offering one to Ray - that is, if he doesn't already have his buzz on. LOL. He backhandedly compliments Ray by telling him he's smarter than he ever gave him credit for because deep down he always knew he didn't have the "make-up of a Ewing or the style", adding, "Your big problem started when you found out that you had Ewing blood." He encourages Ray to go back to being a Krebbs by handing over his ten Ewing voting shares and then permanently relocating to Kansas and maybe dig up his maternal roots. Ray responds by getting all in JR's face and growling at him to get out of his house - but JR urges him to strongly consider his advice, saying, "You know I'm right."
Rebecca and Katherine are over at Cliff's apartment for dinner when Wally Hampton calls Cliff to request a private meeting. Cliff looks visibly intrigued and, after he gets off the phone, tells Rebecca he hopes that a meeting with a mogul like Wally Hampton will bring about a major business deal for Wentworth Tool & Die. Katherine, meanwhile, looks her usual peeved self whenever Cliff discusses anything to do with being at the helm of her late daddy's company.
JR surprises Sue Ellen with a catered dinner and says he thought it'd be nice to cap off his visitation with John Ross with a family dinner. After the caterer sets the table, Sue Ellen admits that the spread looks very scrumptious and decides 'sure, why the hell not?'
Donna calls Miss Ellie from Laredo and tells her she managed to unearth a ton of research material about Sam Culver and is planning to return home tomorrow. She says she can't seem to reach Ray, and Miss Ellie tells her that if she happens to run into the disheveled wino she'll let him know about her travel plans...then invites Donna to join the Ewing clan for dinner.
Charles Eccles tells Bobby that the court hearing has been scheduled, so they'll need a signed affidavit from Christopher's bio aunt to confirm that she has no desire to adopt her baby nephew. Bobby sheepishly tells him that the aunt in question is actually his ex-sister-in-law and that he's kept that tidbit under his hat 'cause he was trying to avoid embarrassing her. Charles makes it clear how he annoyed he is that Bobby didn't disclose this detail until now and reminds him that, in addition to the affidavit, the sister-in-law has to swear that she doesn't know who the bio dad is or where he can be found.
JR summons Sly to his office to ask her if she's heard back from Chester...and when she tells him she hasn't, he instructs her to bug the shit out of him by calling him every two hours until he delivers the videotape he wants. He then gets a call from a bartender at the Longview Bar in Braddock to report that Ray just walked in...and JR grins evilly before calling Miss Ellie to tell her he won't be able to make dinner tonight 'cause he's too busy with work stuff.
Later, a visibly drunk Ray is leaving the Longview Bar with an equally as drunk Bonnie. The two climb into his truck - with stupid Ray getting behind the wheel - then drive off, hopefully without killing any innocent motorists or pedestrians. JR, meanwhile, is parked nearby watching, then follows them to the Starbright Motel.
Wally Hampton arrives at Cliff's office, faux gushes about all the marvellous things he's been hearing about his work at Wentworth Tool & Tie, and says he'd like to hire him as the new Chief Operating Officer of Olco Industries in Tulsa. He describes the job as being "the top dog", and offers to..
Wally emphasizes that he needs to fill the position very quickly, and a flattered looking Cliff tells him it's a compelling offer and that he's definitely going to give it some serious thought. Wally then contorts his voice all weird and breathy-like and lays it on thick about how he really really wants him to join his corporate team at Olco Industries...like, really a lot.
Bobby meets up with Liz Craig and tells her he thinks that Pam needs to rejoin the workforce, 'cause her obsessive coddling of Christopher every minute of every day is really starting to weird him out. Liz says she'd be fine with Pam bringing Christopher to the office with her - but it's unlikely that Harrison Page is baby friendly enough to allow that. She asks Bobby why he doesn't just buy an existing business so that Pam can be her own boss, and Bobby mulls that over for several seconds and looks intrigued by the prospect.
Cliff tells Rebecca about the job offer he just received from Wally Hampton, and she says it sounds very impressive and that he should take the job if he feels it's something he wants to do, assuring him that Wentworth Tool & Die will survive just fine without him. She cautions him to thoroughly check out Wally's company to make sure it's legit, then gives him a congratulatory hug.
Clayton tells Sue Ellen that Dusty is doing amaaaaazing on the rodeo circuit, then asks how her life is going. She tells him she's fine, and that lately JR has been on his best behavior, pretending to be a thoughtful, warm, and generous person. A wary Clayton urges her to be cautious around her wily ex and reminds her that she's never really been on her own before - but she insists that JR has truly changed for the better after the trauma of losing Jock. Clayton's like, "Mmm...maybe", but strongly advises her to keep her guard up nonetheless.
Mitch is smooching Evelyn on her couch, then abruptly stops and says he should be getting home now 'cause he has early morning rounds at the hospital. When Evelyn scrunches her face disappointedly, he blurts out, "I can't do this" 'cause he's still married to Lucy. Evelyn calls the end to his deteriorating marriage "just a technicality", but Mitch insists that he and Lucy have a lot to sort out before he starts hitting the sheets with other women. He implores her to understand, promises to call her tomorrow, and beats a hasty retreat.
Sly hands JR the videotape that Chester was finally able to messenger over, and JR excitedly puts it into the VCR and smiles happily at whatever comes onto the screen after he presses play. He then phones Sue Ellen and tells her he has something special to show her and hopes it's OK if he comes over later in the week, and she's like 'yeah sure, why the hell not?'
Evelyn calls Lucy at Southfork to invite her to lunch so they can haggle over which of them gets to be with Mitch, and Lucy's like 'yeah sure, why the hell not?'
Lucy wanders into the kitchen and tells Miss Ellie she just got a call from Ms. Evelyn Michaelson, aka the beautiful, fully grown woman who's making a bold play for Mitch. Miss Ellie asks her if she considers herself to be a full grown woman, and Lucy's like, "Nope, I think of myself as an persistently immature girl-child" [sorry - that was just me, projecting], and Miss Ellie reminds her that she's not a child anymore and that she should be fighting harder for Mitch than she's been doing...that is, assuming she still wants to be married to the dullard.
Bobby is meeting with a pretty blonde woman to convince her to sell him her very successful business so that Pam has something with which to occupy her leisure time beyond smothering - I mean mothering - Christopher. The woman says she's reluctant to sell because she's turned her business into a very successful venture, and Bobby says he fully gets that and expects to pay top dollar. The woman replies, "You're a very impressive man, Mr. Ewing" (?? LOL) and promises to speak to her accountant and come up with an inflated selling price they can both agree on.
Before dinner that evening, Bobby tells Pam he has a surprise for her - but won't reveal it until tomorrow. A few seconds later, Donna arrives at the house and tells Miss Ellie that Ray wasn't home when she got back from Laredo...and the rest of the clan says they haven't seen him in awhile either. Miss Ellie assures Donna that Ray will eventually come around, and JR coos faux sympathetically about how sorry he is about her marriage going down the shitter.
Cliff tells Rebecca he looked into Wally Hampton's company and concluded that it seems on the up and up...and is getting very excited about a job that has an expense account and access to a private jet.
Donna gets a call from the manager of the Starbright Motel to inform her that Ray is in very rough shape and that she needs to come pick him up asap. Donna says she'll be there shortly...and when the camera pans out, we see that JR has bribed the manager to make the call to Donna.
Donna arrives at the motel and is mystified by the do not disturb sign on the door handle of Ray's room. She lets herself in with the room key and is startled to find Ray in bed with Bonnie. She stares incredulously at her disheveled, unfaithful shitbag of a husband, coldly says, "Well, at least I know how you've been spending your time", then storms out as Ray makes a weak effort to call after her. Bonnie, meanwhile, looks positively delighted at being caught red-handed by Donna and points out to Ray that they've been seen together all over town and never bothered to have the decency to hide the fact that they were hooking up...to the point that anyone with half a brain could put two and two together. Ray doesn't disagree, then stares despondently into space and states the obvious, "She has no choice but to leave me now." That she doesn't, Ray. That she doesn't.
Bobby brings Pam to an aerobics studio and tells her that this is her big surprise. As she looks around and scrunches her face confusedly, he ushers her over to the daycare/nursery and asks her if she thinks Christopher will like it. When she still looks befuddled, he explains that he bought the studio for her to run, hands her a key with a keychain that reads Pam's Aerobics Unlimited, and declares, "You're in the bodybuilding business now." Pam squeals happily and gives him a grateful hug.
In a downtown restaurant, Evelyn tells Lucy that she's very interested in Mitch, and Lucy counters that since Mitch is her husband, there's really nothing to discuss. Evelyn solemnly insists, "I want him", and Lucy cattily retorts that it's kinda cougar-ish of her to be chasing after a young buck like Mitch. Evelyn says again that she really really wants Mitch and that it's long past time they dissolved their short-lived, failed marriage so he can get on with his life, pronouncing that she's fully capable of making him happy. She smugly fibs, "I already have" and a shocked Lucy's all, "Wuh? He swore that you haven't slept together!" Evelyn says he likely didn't want to hurt her feelings, and Lucy glares at her with a look of peeved devastation before abruptly getting up from the table and flouncing out of the restaurant.
JR arrives at Sue Ellen's house with a bouquet of yellow roses and says he has something very special to show her.
Lucy flees to Studio Creepy, where Roger is working late. She tells him she's been driving around for hours thinking about her disloyal husband, then moans, "How could he?" She further explains that he's been making a fool out of her by sleeping with another woman...and that she ended up here 'cause she needed someone to talk to. Roger perks up at that development and asks her if she's sure she just wants to talk, then kisses her before pointing out, "You didn't come here just to talk. Not at this hour." Lucy chews on that for a few seconds, then kisses the freak back...and then looks totally into it when his kissing gets increasingly and blechingly urgent.
JR plays the videotape for Sue Ellen, which turns out to be footage of the Miss Texas beauty pageant she entered fourteen years ago, aka the first time she and JR met. He tenderly tells her she hasn't changed a bit, then reminisces about the first moment he laid eyes on her as she pranced across the stage during the swimsuit competition. He says that lately he's been thinking about the old days, decided he really really wanted to be with her tonight, and has come to the conclusion that his life isn't the same without her. Sue Ellen looks touched [by his sudden interest in rekindling the romance that's been nonexistent in their marriage since well before the series began] and leans forward...and the two start smooching before amorously getting it on.
Good grief, Sue Ellen.
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