Recap: Pacey is over at Casa Leery, playing darts by himself while Dawson reworks his movie script. When Pacey laments what a dumbass his own father thinks he is, Dawson rightly worries that the upcoming father-son fishing trip (with the two of them and their dads) is going to be a disaster. After the opening credits, Pacey and Dawson are riding their bikes around Capeside when they run into Pa Witter in his police cruiser. Pa Witter fawningly tells Dawson that when he becomes a movie mogul in Hollywood he shouldn't become such a big shot that he forgets about all the little people in Capeside, where Pacey will no doubt be flipping burgers for a living. He then changes the subject to the upcoming father-son fishing trip and warns Dawson that he and Mitch need to be ready to reel 'em in hard 'cause they're going to be in the presence of fishing greatness. He then tells Dawson to keep an eye on his idiot son before getting back into his cruiser and driving off...and Pacey grumbles about the non-stop insults he gets from the fuckbag, which Dawson breezily chalks up to a father affectionately chiding his son. Later at Capeside High, Dawson is waxing on to Joey about what a great movie producer Jen is proving herself to be, which Joey naturally translates as criticism that she wasn't nearly as good in the role when she produced his grisly Season 1 swamp creature flick. Dawson then wanders off - just as Jen ambles over to say hey and tell Joey that she's helping Shaggy D.A. conduct a focus group on teenage girls as the "new consumer phenomenon". Joey bitchily asks if she's now helping Shaggy D.A. do news reports in her spare time, and Jen ignores her cunty 'tude and explains that she's mostly interested in watching a seasoned journalist in action. She adds that Shaggy D.A. is looking for girls who are thoughtful and well-spoken, then wanks Joey about how she's the most articulate wondergirl she's ever heard speak her mind - all while Joey continues contorting her face in a pissy 'go fuck yourself, Jen' expression. The next day, Dawson and Mitch arrive at the dock for the annual Capeside Fall Fishing Classic and climb aboard the Witter boat (titled Reel Action), where they're greeted by Pacey and Pa Witter. When Jack ambles aboard a few seconds later, Dawson's all, "The fuck is that guy doing here?", so Pacey sheepishly says that he (conveniently) forgot to mention that he invited his girlfriend's brother to join them for the weekend...and a few seconds later, Reel Action sets sail as a miffed Dawson glares poutishly into space. Jen greets Joey and Andie when they arrive at Casa Leery for the teenage girl focus group...and Andie looks less than thrilled to see that Jen has also - for some God-only-knows-why reason - invited Abby to participate. Shaggy D.A. gushes about what a fun day they're all going to have, and instructs the cameraman to set up the filming equipment inside the living room. Aboard Reel Action, Dawson sourly asks Jack why in blazes he would accept Pacey's invitation to go on a father-son fishing trip with him, Pacey, and their dads, so Jack explains that Pacey neglected to tell him that he (Dawson) was going to be here...and that since it's too late for any of them to exit the boat, they should just do their best to get along. Dawson dickishly chides his foolishness in leaving his hot new girlfriend unattended for an entire weekend and warns that some new guy could come along and steal her away, then self-piteously mutters, "Trust me, that sucks." Shaggy D.A. asks her focus group participants what the most important issues facing teenagers today are and directs the question specifically at Joey, and Joey responds by mutely grimacing into space. When the rest of the group is equally as uncommunicative, Shaggy D.A. pulls Jen aside to worriedly tell her that so far she's gotten nothing in the way of useful feedback for her report. Jen points out that a small group of teenage girls who loathe each other and are crammed together in her living room is probably not the most conducive of environments to get them to open up...so Shaggy D.A. suggests to the gals that they engage in some girl bonding before extending the afternoon into a fun "ladies night". Abby looks alarmed by the mention of a ladies night and asks how long they're all going to be stuck here, and Shaggy D.A. says she reaaaaally needs them to connect with one another...and that she has enough junk food in her kitchen to bribe them into staying at her house until they're loosened up enough to answer her many questions. Pa Witter snarls at everyone about how this fishing trip isn't a pleasure cruise, and that they're all going to have to work together to reel in the contest winning fish. He then barks specific orders at everyone - except Pacey, who he orders to do a series of grunt work assignments like baiting hooks and raising/lowering the anchor. Pacey complains about how hard is sucks to be the grunt man, and Pa Witter snappishly retorts that life sucks, a glum reality he suggests Pacey fully grasp prior to entering adulthood. The gals, meanwhile, are pigging out in the Leery kitchen when Abby suddenly decides that she'd like to amuse herself by snooping in Dawson's bedroom...and eventually the rest of the gals follow her upstairs. Jack offers Dawson a sandwich, says it'd be nice if they became friends, and points out that a highly intelligent and strong-willed person such as Joey can't be "stolen away". Dawson snarks back that he really doesn't know Joey all that well, and calls him delusional for thinking that things between him and Joey are truly, 100% over. Jack insists that he and Joey have something special going, and that if he respects Joey he should also respect him...and Dawson responds by shooting him an extra squinty stink-eye. Abby snoops through Dawson's closet looking for contraband...and Jen and Joey join forces to barricade her inside the closet by physically blocking the door. Andie, meanwhile, cackles delightedly when she finds the porn flick Good Will Humping in a stack of VHS tapes. Jack manages to snag a fish on his line, and Pa Witter rushes over and takes over the task of reeling...but when it looks as though the line snaps, he chews out Pacey for not installing one of the new fishing rods the way he fuckin' ordered him to. As a peeved Pacey stares despondently into space, Dawson ambles over to grumble at him for inviting Jack to infiltrate the father-son trip, so Pacey explains that Andie's always nagging him to include Jack in his man plans...then snaps at Dawson to stop fucking complaining about the guy already 'cause he's got far bigger things to be stressed out over. The gals are sitting atop Dawson's bed, giggling in shocked amusement at the Good Will Humping sexcapades when Shaggy D.A. suddenly bursts into the room to ask what they're doing. Andie quickly shuts off the VCR and fibs that they were watching an educational video they happened to stumble across - but the jig is immediately up when Abby openly confesses that the "educational video" is a porn flick that belongs to Dawson, who's clearly a giant pervert. As Shaggy D.A. ushers the girls out of Dawson's room, Jen pulls Joey aside to call her out on her openly hostile bitchitude and ask why her treatment of her is still so blatantly cunty despite the tedious Jen/Dawson/Joey love triangle having run its course. Joey shoots her the stink-eye and snarls, "Stop encroaching on what's mine" and admonishes her for continually recasting herself in what she considers her life's role: Dawson's girlfriend/best friend/movie producer, and Shaggy D.A.'s assistant. She sarcastically asks Jen if she'll be getting a waitressing job at the Ice House next, and an exasperated Jen admonishes her for always behaving like such a rude, insecure dickwad. That evening, the menfolk take a break from fishing and head to a local bar to play darts and shoot some pool. When Dawson complains to Pacey about Mitch's mid-life crisis, Pacey points out that at least his dad isn't a total shitbag parent - unlike the hell it is to be the perpetually crapped on spawn of Pa Witter. When Dawson scrunches his face confusedly, Jack interjects to explain to Dawson that he can't see Pa Witter for the emotionally abusive fucktard he is 'cause of the way he's always putting him on a pedestal for the purpose of making Pacey feel worthless. Dawson chews on that [somehow startling to him] revelation while staring contemplatively into space. Over at Focus Group Central, Abby complains about how insecure teenage girls can be, specifically whenever she publicly lobs hurtful personal insults at Joey and Andie. A fed up Shaggy D.A. tells her they've heard enough of her "opinions", thanks her for coming, and hustles her out the door...and an incredulous Abby snarks, "You're throwing me out?", then bitchily calls Shaggy D.A. a trashy journalist who sleeps around. Dawson finds Mitch laying out his sleeping bag on the dock to prepare for a night under the stars and judgey-ly asks what he plans on doing with the rest of his life. Mitch stares back at him blankly and goes, "Dunno" and assures him he's doing OK for money - at least for the time being. Dawson shoots him a look of incredulity and dickishly marvels about his willingness to spend two days fishing, when his priority should be job-hunting and developing some kind of game plan for his aimless life. Mitch sheepishly says he's sorry that his own son is so disappointed in him 'cause he truly wants to be the kind of man he can respect, then insists that there must something out there he can put his heart and passion behind (that hopefully pays something resembling a living wage). Back at the bar, Pa Witter drunkenly staggers over to Pacey and nonsensically mumbles about how it's his job to protect him, and figures that the best way to accomplish this is to verbally abuse him in front of his friends [and his friends' parents] at every opportunity. He then notices a nearby dart board and suggests they play...and when he hits the bullseye, he barks, "Beat that!", which prompts a tortured looking Pacey to despondently stare into space before deliberately misfiring his dart. Pa Witter sneeringly says that losing is OK as long as he does it gracefully...and after he shuffles off disinterestedly, Pacey aims another dart at the board and easily hits the bullseye. Andie laments her incessant need to be perfect...and figures that if she earns straight A's, she won't be seen for the fraud she imagines herself to be. Following that disembowelling, Jen shares that she initially felt relief at leaving the "hyper-accelerated world of New York" to live in a slow-moving podunk town - but then found herself quickly branded as the Capeside slut. Joey, in response, sheepishly explains that her defences go up whenever she meets people who have experienced things she hasn't yet experienced, and constantly worries about being an insignificant nobody her entire life and never leaving Capeside [like, for example, when she stupidly squandered the opportunity to spend the summer in Paris]. Jen quietly nods as if to say 'yep, that definitely explains a lot.' Dawson finds Jack curled up on the boat, fighting a bout of nausea from being at sea all day. When Dawson grumbles at him about his aimless, man-child of a father, Jack tells him to have a little perspective, given that his father grew so tired of having an unstable wife that he abandoned the entire family to go live in Providence. Pacey assists his drunkard of a father out of the bar and onto the nearby sand, where he abruptly collapses and passes out. Pacey wryly suggests that they have an impromptu father-son chat, then tells him about his amazing new girlfriend who's somehow under the illusion that he's special...then tears up and asks the unconscious fuckbag why he's given up on him and his specialness. He sobs while railing at him for not loving him as a father should: by completely overlooking how boneheaded and useless he's more than likely to become later in life. The next day, Jack manages to snag another fish on his line, and Pacey rushes over and takes over the rod to reel it in. A visibly excited Pa Witter coaches him as he reels in what ends up being a gigantic fish. Shaggy D.A. thanks Joey for so eloquently baring her soul during the focus group discussion, then says she's always wanted a daughter and likes to think of her as a surrogate daughter. She wanks her about how proud she is of the woman she's becoming, and Joey looks touched as the two hug. Abby exits Casa Leery and notices Abby sleeping on the outdoor deck, covered with a blanket. She asks Abby if she spent the entire night here, and Abby snaps, "What do you care?" and says she's waiting for her mom to pick her up...and the two snipe back and forth, with Andie admonishing her for making her life a living hell. Abby argues that she's merely playing the role of the girl everyone loves to hate and has subsequently become the town's scapegoat - but Andie argues that she's less a scapegoat than an unnecessarily mean she-devil who likes to indiscriminately trash people. Abby rolls her eyes and says that being sweet is sooooo boring, as is her parents' boring divorce and her boring home life, and that she much prefers to stir up intrigue and drama. An incredulous Andie tells her she has no idea how lucky she is to have a normal life with non-loony parents, and Abby shrugs and chalks up that sentiment to the grass always being greener. When her mom pulls up a few seconds later, she asks Andie if she could use a lift home, and Andie decides, 'ah, what the hell' and climbs into the passenger seat. Joey has a one-on-one with Jen to apologize for her cuntiness during much of this episode by nonsensically explaining that she respects the people with whom she's in imaginary competitions. Jen remarks on the contrived stalemate they've been locked into ever since her arrival in Season 1, then assures her that she's not trying to replace her as Dawson's #1 person and/or Shaggy D.A.'s surrogate daughter. The two then beam happily at other and agree on how much they respect they have for one another. Pacey proudly holds up the trophy he won for reeling in the biggest fish of all the fishes caught during the Capeside Fall Fishing Classic, and the local reporters snaps his photograph. He happily tells his pa what an adrenaline rush this accomplishment has been, and Pa Witter dickishly tells him to always remember this awesome moment 'cause, given what a hopeless halfwit he is, he probably won't have many more like it. A deflated Pacey later tells Dawson he definitely set himself up for that insult and laments never being able to get a 'good job, son' out of the heartless bastard. Dawson tells him to forget about getting a pat on the head from his asshat of a father and to instead focus on all of the people in his life who do like and respect him, specifically a certain blonde lass who's likely to be very excited at the prospect of seeing him after an entire weekend apart. Pacey thanks him for his kind words and shuffles off. Mitch drives Dawson home and says that father-son relationships can be complicated, and that he regrets the fact that he and his dad never really got along. He promises to do his best to father him in as non-toxic a way as is possible, and Dawson thanks him for being the kind of dad who lets him make his own mistakes and never makes him feel inadequate. He then clarifies his earlier bitchery by explaining that he's not so much disappointed in his aimlessness than he is worried about his inability to financially support himself, and assures him he feels very lucky to have him as a father. Mitch gives him a hug...then looks startled when, as the two approach the front door, he suddenly remembers that Casa Leery is no longer his home. He quickly scampers back to his car and drives off as Dawson heads inside for the night. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
0 Comments
Recap: In conclusion to the previous episode..
The next day at Capeside High, Dawson is finishing up a presentation for Mr. Peterson's English class on the mystery genre in film. Mr. Peterson then calls on Abby to deliver her presentation, but she says she's not prepared on account of her family pet chewed up a box of laxatives and bled the death...and despite the fake tragedy of her deceased pet, it remains unclear how one would have anything to do with the other. Mr. Peterson calls her out on the brazen fib and warns that if she fails to turn in her project on time, she's going to fail the entire course. A few seconds later, the bell rings to signal the end of the period - which means it would have been too late for Abby to deliver her presentation, so it's weird that Mr. Peterson even called on her - and as everyone rushes off, Chris Wolfe finds a handwritten letter that someone accidentally dropped on the floor and looks intrigued by its contents. Andie joins Pacey at his table in the cafeteria and gives him a big smooch, and he looks visibly uncomfortable with the PDA and tells her it's probably not a good idea to so blatantly advertise their budding romance. An unfazed Andie thanks him for the awesome date they had last night and applauds him for being the perfect gentleman. Elsewhere in the cafeteria, Dawson gives Jen the latest version of his movie script, which now contains a sex scene between the Dawson character and the beautiful neighbor from the big city. Subtle. He saucily adds that last night's impromptu smoochfest inspired him to add a bit of racy sex to his movie. Chris shows Abby the mysterious letter he found, and Abby looks intrigued as she reads aloud a passage.. I want to talk to you about last night. The whole night was amazing, but sex changes everything. I think we should take some time before anything happens again. Abby asks Chris who wrote the letter, and he says he has no clue, 'cause he found it lying on the floor of their English class after everyone had filed out. Jack asks Joey if she turned in the nude drawing of him to her teacher yet, and Joey says she hasn't and is about to pull it out of her folder when Jack stops her and says he'd prefer that not everyone at Capeside High get a gander at his sketched naughties. He then asks if he can have it after she's shown it to her teacher...and when Joey gives him a weird look, he explains that he wants it as a keepsake so that he can always remember their first near doink. Andie asks Pacey what he got on his history quiz, but he moodily declines to show her...and when she asks him if he's angry about last night, he moodily assures her he's not. Andie chides him for doing the typical guy thing of shutting down when the relationship shows its first signs of progressing into something serious, but he denies shutting down and explains away his glumness by saying he needs to go study. Dawson tells Jen that he's completely fine with them being platonic friends, and she looks visibly bummed that last night's amorousness did nothing to change the status of their relationship - a level of disappointment that seems wildly inconsistent with her firm rebuffing of his advances the night they went skinny dipping two episodes ago. Abby tells Chris that, for her English project that's supposed to be about mystery in literature, she's going to "deconstruct literary convention" and crack The Mystery of the Letter Someone Accidentally Dropped on the Floor. Sounds less like a clever deconstruction than a guaranteed way of getting an F in English class. When Chris says that the author of the letter could be anyone, Abby points out that there are only three couples in the class, then glances around the cafeteria, motions at Dawson/Jen, Jack/Joey, and Andie/Pacey, and makes a case to why someone in each couple could be the author. She tells Chris that she's going to need him to videotape the investigative process...and when he asks what he's going to get out of the deal, she reluctantly promises, "I'll let you touch me in bad places." Chris perks up at that and is all, "Deal!" ... which is so completely ew on so many levels, even for '90s TV. Dawson and Joey are standing together in front of the school, waiting for the heavy rain to subside. Joey comes right out and asks Dawson if his new movie is about them...and when he admits that it's "in the vein" of them, Joey jokes that she should probably read the script in order to ensure that it's not character assassination. Dawson looks deeply troubled by the remark and earnestly assures her that he'd never ever write anything hurtful about her. Abby tells Chris that she's going to start shaking the tree to see what falls out, then runs into Jen in the hall. She tells Jen she read Dawson's newest script rewrite, which now includes a kinky sex scene with the beautiful neighbor from the big city, then asks if the two of them acted it out in real life beforehand. Jen dismissively tells her her mind is in overdrive, so Abby retorts, "People do hear things...like about the other night", then asks if Dawson has talents besides filmmaking. When Jen snaps back that what happens in her bedroom stays in her bedroom, Abby bitchily asks her if all the pining she did over Dawson this season has been worth it...and Jen stonily says it was, then storms off to class. Chris applauds Abby for getting Jen to crack so easily - but Abby points out that extracting a sexual confession from Jen isn't worth a helluva lot, which means she's still on the hunt to figure out who wrote the letter. In lieu of focusing on her own life and/or working on her assignment for English class. Abby connives to get a sample of Pacey's handwriting by asking him to sign a petition for a school condom dispenser - LOL - and then tries to get Jack and Andie to do the same, while Chris tries in vain to get Dawson to admit to hitting the sheets with Jen. Abby tells Andie that she heard all about hers and Pacey's racy evening last night and fibs that word on the street is that Pacey found her lacking. As Andie absorbs the insult while neither confirming nor denying getting it on with Pacey, a frustrated Abby heads over to the computer lab, where Chris had been trying to pump Joey for intel. She notices that Joey accidentally left behind her drawing of nude Jack and stares at the dead ringer for Mr. Bean sketch while murmuring, "And the plot thickens." Abby drops by Dawson's house to try to convince him that she has it on good authority Joey and Jack went to bed together, then shows him the nude Jack drawing as proof. When Dawson does his best to look unaffected and points out that a nude drawing for an art class does not a sexual encounter make, Abby asks him if Joey has ever drawn him naked. As Dawson chews on that while contemplatively staring into space, she sympathetically clucks about how, after all these years, he didn't end up being Joey's first...which essentially makes him her nothing. Chris feigns enough interest in The Mystery of the Letter Someone Accidentally Dropped on the Floor to ask Abby if she knows whodunit yet, and she assures him that all will be revealed soon enough. She then orders him to discreetly hand out invitations to all six of her suspects, asking them to convene at 7pm in Mr. Peterson's classroom, and Chris mumbles about how she's Nancy Drew...from hell. Andie is visibly miffed at Pacey and accuses him of blabbing to people about their sexless evening, and Pacey's all, "Wuh?" and insists that he didn't say anything to anyone. Andie says she doesn't buy that and chides him for spreading "sexual propaganda" throughout the school - demonstrating that she doesn't actually understand the meaning of propaganda - and Pacey gets irked and says if she really thinks he'd tell tales about their private bidness, they have nothing to talk about, and storms off. Joey tells Jen she read Dawson's edited script and expresses annoyance that Fictional Dawson had sex with Fictional Jen. She bitchily asks if the newly added doink was based on anything autobiographical, and Jen wryly says she's going to have to speak with the script's author 'bout that. Dawson hands Joey her nude Jack drawing as he bitterly says how overwhelmed he is by her artistic abilities. Abby's invitations have reached all six of the suspects, and at 7pm sharp, Jen, Dawson, Jack, Andie, Pacey, and Joey file into Mr. Peterson's classroom to satisfy their curiosity. Abby arrives with Chris (who has a camera rolling) to reveal her "mystery project", aka uncover the identity of the person who wrote a private letter that Chris found on the floor and didn't have the decency to keep under wraps, given that the content of it was absolutely none of his or Abby's business. As everyone somehow looks intrigued enough to stay in the room in order to see this boneheaded storyline to its conclusion, Abby goes up to the front lectern and rambles maniacally about how sex is the world's greatest mystery - one which poets, scientists, and philosophers have tried to rationalize. Her captive audience tells her to shut it and get to the point, so Abby goes through her list of suspects and explains her theories..
Abby moves onto the couple she hasn't yet harassed: Pacey and Andie. She reveals that the handwriting from the letter matches Pacey's, so Pacey admits that, yeah, he's the one who wrote it...and Andie's all, "Wuh?" and translates this to mean that he has zero desire to have sex with her. After she storms off, Jack gets all in Pacey's face and shoots him the stink-eye for breaking his sister's heart, so Pacey tries to explain that Abby's contrived mystery unraveling isn't exactly as it appears. When Abby cackles about how thrilled she is that Chris was able to get all of this drama on videotape, Jen snarls at her for being a manipulative, cruel, and pathetic dickwad. As she stomps off, Abby hangs her head contritely. The next day, Mr. Peterson calls on Abby to deliver her literature mystery assignment, then sarcastically asks her if she applied an ounce of integrity to her assignment. Abby looks around at her classmates, decides that her findings with respect to The Mystery of the Letter Someone Accidentally Dropped on the Floor would either be in bad taste or doesn't actually qualify as a legitimate English class assignment and tells Mr. Peterson she didn't complete it. Mr. Peterson curtly gives her an F, then calls on Andie to deliver her presentation. Later, Jack glumly tells Jen that it's not much fun playing second string to a dumbbell like Dawson, and Jen wryly tells him he'll get used to it (the way she has), and that she loves Dawson - but has concluded that he's unable to stop obsessing about Joey long enough to explore other possibilities. When she asks Jack why he and Joey didn't sleep together, he blushes and whispers that his equipment wouldn't cooperate, and Jen chuckles and says she can only imagine how confusing it was for his penis to pose nude for someone of the opposite sex. Pacey climbs into the passenger seat of Andie's car so that he can offer a nonsensical explanation as to why he's been so cold and distant lately. He reveals that he got an A on his history quiz, and that no longer being the village idiot shook up his world order so dramatically that he reacted by pulling away from her. He credits her for opening up a whole new life for him, calls her "the single most important being to ever grace my existence", and admits to having fallen hopelessly in love with her. After Andie stares at him in stunned bewilderment for several seconds, she reciprocates her deep feelings of love for him, and then leans in for a kiss. Dawson asks Joey why she thinks nothing sexual transpired between him and Jen, and Joey just kind of shrugs and says it's all about finding the perfect person. As the two head towards the exit and once again stand in front of the school while waiting for the heavy rain to let up, he asks her why she wanted him to think she'd slept with Jack. She's like, "Dunno, same reason you wanted me to think you slept with Jen" ... and the two express relief that the other is still a virgin and could still conceivably be each other's first. Dawson tells her he misses her and is willing to accept any of part of a friendship with her, and Joey says she'd be up for the two of them slowly re-connecting. Dawson then happily suggests they make a run for it in the heavy rain, but Joey tells him she'd rather walk...which they do and get soaking wet as a result. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: Dawson and Pacey are reading aloud the latest version of Dawson's movie script, which - no surprise - appears to be riddled with the same kind of absurdly over-engineered dialogue that the Dawson's Creek writers insist on packing into every script. "My electrical synapses are on overload here. My brain is telling me one thing, but my heart it says another: it's telling me that I should consider the unequivocal, highly irrational, possibly damaging proposition of loving you back." When Dawson asks Pacey what he thinks of the dreck, Pacey tells him he's writing with waaay too many syllables, then asks, "What's with all the psychobabble insight? How many teenagers do you know that talk like that?" ... which, interestingly, suggests that despite the Dawson's Creek writers having enough self-awareness about the wretchedness of their scriptwriting style to joke about it, they continued writing scripts with the same level of wretchedness for another four and a half seasons. Pacey remarks that the Joey character seems a little on the angry side...and when Dawson denies have written a Joey character, Pacey rolls his eyes and is like, "Yeah right" and says that the movie is clearly about his/Joey's friendship and subsequent failed romance. He adds that the movie comes off as dark and obtuse, aka very un-Dawson Leery - and Dawson takes that as a compliment 'cause it was his intention to write something that was purely emotionally driven. Pacey asks him why the starring couple never hits the sheets and then urges him to "take the risky plunge" - but Dawson argues that since teenagers in movies are always going at it, it'd actually be riskier and out of the ordinary [particularly for anything borne of the Dawson's Creek universe] for them not to have sex. Or abstain from talking about sex 24/7. The next morning at Capeside High, Dawson and Jen are handing out movie audition fliers to their fellow schoolmates. Dawson tells Jen to be sure to get a flier to blonde, sweet-faced James Lowell, prompting Jen to grunt, "Ew" and remark that he's about as sexy as a bucket. She motions over at the broody, goatee sporting Dave Fachelli, whose bad boy vibe makes him waaaay more appealing as a leading man. As Dawson chews on that prospect, Jen points out that when it comes to moviegoers, sexy always wins out over nice...and urges him to make less obvious choices during the casting process. Pacey tells Andie he got an HIV test and tested negative, and Andie says she's pleased that he took her suggestion to get tested, but that he shouldn't assume it was an invitation to hop into bed together. Pacey pretends to have no earthly idea what she's talking about and tells her that he got tested for his own peace of mind, and assures her that he's A-OK with the two of them not rushing into sex. Joey is sitting outside, working on her latest sketch, when Dawson wanders over to say hey. She tells him her art class is currently focusing on the nude male form...and when Dawson asks her if she's at all weirded out by a live nude man posing for her art class, she admits that she's been blushing a lot more than usual - but is getting better at not getting so wigged out by the sight of an unclothed male. Chris asks Abby if she plans to audition for Dawson's movie, but she just rolls her eyes and says she couldn't be less interested in Dawson's lame home video project. Chris tells her that he, on the other hand, is an aspiring actor and is intrigued by the opportunity of getting some Hollywood type exposure. He asks her if she'd like to audition with him 'cause he thinks they'd have "serious chemistry" [which is interesting, considering her expressed desire during the previous Election episode to destroy him] - but she sassily tells him to salivate elsewhere 'cause she couldn't be less interested. Jack wanders over to where Joey is drawing, admires her skilled technique, then accidentally spills his drink all over her sketch. Joey's all, "Ack!" and stares at her ruined art in horrified shock. Dawson and Jen are in the school's auditorium, holding the first round of auditions, and look visibly dismayed by the lack of acting talent at Capeside High. Jack apologizes to Joey for ruining her sketch, and an irked Joey says there's not much she can do - except get an F for having an incomplete assignment 'cause there's no way to redo it without a live nude man posing for her. Jack offers to serve as her model...and when Joey's like, "Hell no", he assures her that not every moment on Dawson's Creek has to be sexually charged, and that she should think of him lounging naked atop her couch as a professional service he's freely offering. Later at the pharmacy, Andie has just gotten her Xanax prescription filled when she runs into Pacey, who asks her what's in the bag...then grabs it out of her hands (!), sees that it's a prescription for Xanax for Andrea McPhee, and asks if that's something one takes for anxiety and severe depression. Andie tells him that the pills are for her mom, who's also named Andrea - a fib Pacey easily buys. He then pretends that he didn't drop by the drugstore to stock up on condoms, but Andie suggests they get some so that they're fully prepared for whenever they decide to bump uglies...and he looks impressed by her mature attitude towards sex. Chris and Abby are auditioning for Dawson's movie [I guess she changed her mind about being bitchily uninterested in doing that], and Chris does a reasonably good job - until he slips Abby the tongue during the kissing sequence. She shoves him away from her and demands to know what the hell that was, so he explains that he needed to insert his tongue into her mouth in order to fully get into the role. She angrily accuses him of wanting to get into her pants and storms off the stage while Chris just kind of shrugs, then redirects his attention to Dawson and Jen before taking a bow. LOL. Andie tells Pacey she wants her first roll in the hay to be special, and that her fantasy of the big, cherry popping night has always included a fancy dinner, moonlit stroll by the dock, and an overnight stay in a B&B. Pacey assures her that he totally gets what a big deal it is for a girl to lose her virginity, and is more than happy to do his part in making it a memorable evening. Andie smiles approvingly and says that all of this romantic talk is making her want to jump his bones asap. Jen urges Dawson to re-write his movie script so that the young lovers hit the sheets - but Dawson insists that the movie is less about sex than it is about romance, and that he wanted to make the less obvious choice. Jen points out that if he had wanted to make a less obvious choice, he shouldn't have chosen the most obvious girl in his life (Joey) to be the template for the movie's leading lady. As Joey readies herself to paint Jack's nude form, Jack enters her living room with a towel cinched around his waist. He positions himself atop the couch and jokes about how much this reminds him of the scene in Titanic where Jack draws Rose like one of his French girls. Joey tells him she'd find it far less distracting and, frankly, less embarrassing if he kept his trap shut, then puts her pencil down and says she really can't handle seeing him naked. She tells him to get dressed and go home, then accidentally knocks over her easel...and as Jack moves to help her pick up her stuff, he accidentally drops his towel. Joey gasps in shock when she catches a glimpse of his naughties...so then Jack points out that since she's now seen him in his fully glory, he may as well stay so that she can continue with her sketching and not get an F on the assignment. Later, Joey tells Jack that her sketch is coming along fine, then natters about how she always feels as though she's doing something special whenever she draws or paints something. As the evening wears on.. Jen sees Dawson wandering by his dock, so she ambles over to talk to him some more about how lackluster his movie script is. Pacey and Andie are enjoying a tasty dinner in a fancy restaurant. Jack tells Joey he's not a virgin on account of he's had one sexual encounter. Dawson thanks Jen for helping out with the auditions. She jokes that if he gets desperate enough, she can always step in to play his leading lady...and Dawson says he definitely likes the sound of that idea. Joey tells Jack that the idea of having sex terrifies her, and Jack agrees that sex is definitely scary, but can't articulate exactly why [other than his internal struggle about exactly how and when to come out of the closet]. Jen strongly urges Dawson to do a script re-write and allow the characters in his movie to act on what their likeliest life choices would be. She explains that true love is always fueled by lust, and that people who dig each other usually wind up having sex...adding that intent and motive is what makes movie sex super interesting for viewers. When Joey asks Jack what sex feels like, he describes it as a jumble of emotions...and in terms of art is like an expressionist painting, seeing Van Gogh's Starry Night for the first time, or laying amid Monet's water lilies. When the phone suddenly rings, Joey gasps when she reaches for the phone and gets a glimpse of Jack's penis before he has a chance to cover himself...and by her overly startled reaction, I couldn't help wondering if what he was trying to cover so quickly was an unintended boner. Pacey leads a blindfolded Andie into a beautiful B&B bedroom...and when he removes the blindfold, she's overcome by his touching efforts to give her her end of virginity fantasy evening. Pacey assures her that there's no pressure to hit the sheets tonight, and that they can save the sex for another time if she prefers. Andie says that while she'd like them to get busy, she isn't quite ready...and Pacey envelopes her into a comforting hug and says he's satisfied enough just having her in his life. Andie blurts out, "You make me want to do it!", and Pacey perks up at that and leans in for a smooch. Dawson is re-working his script, staring at a framed photo of Joey for added inspiration. Jack asks Joey if getting a gander at his groin is going to screw things up between them, and she awkwardly natters about how they're both human and that there's definitely something between them. No penis pun intended. She remarks that tonight was "a big step in the life of little Joey Potter" - OMFG - but that she feels as though she's bitten off more than she could chew as she wrestles with her hormones. Jack tells her he's available anytime she's up for exploring her curiosity, and she admits that that's a far less scary thing to contemplate now that he's fully clothed...and then the two lean in and enjoy an amorous smoochfest. Dawson climbs into Jen's bedroom window to tell her that he's been thinking about what she said earlier regarding love versus lust. He leans in, kisses her, and asks her to please refrain from questioning his motive...and when she says she knows better than to do that, he leans in for a follow-up kiss. Pacey abruptly puts the brakes on his and Andie's smoochfest and says he doesn't think she's 100% ready to seal the deal. He assures her that she'll know when she's really, definitely, absolutely ready to go all the way, and that their budding romance is far too important for a 'do now, think later' type approach. Joey and Jack, meanwhile, continue to smooch...as do Dawson and Jen. Pacey and Andie check out of the B&B and smilingly stroll down the street, hand in hand. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: At Casa Leery, Dawson is in his room watching The Partridge Family while Jen reads his movie script. When she finally finishes, she tells him the final verdict is that she didn't totally hate it, but considers it the kind of insipid fluff that can only be borne of someone whose view of the world is startlingly naïve. Dawson argues that his story emanates from "the age of innocence" - but Jen's all 'meh' and tells him that while the script is funny and well written, "it lacks relevance to today's society". In other words, the lackluster thing has no oomph. She urges him to loosen up and focus the story on the raw kind of pain that comes with being a teenager, and not write from the perspective of a rube boy-man who refuses to allow himself the experience of being a fifteen year old. She adds that if he needs help regressing, she'd be more than happy to do all she can to help him reclaim those missing years. The next morning, Andie runs into Joey at school and natters about the epiphany she had last night: she suddenly got a burning desire to run for sophomore class president and wants a smarty-pants like Joey to be her running mate. Joey says she could not possibly be less interested in that, but Andie earnestly points out that since she consistently earns top grades, she has a responsibility to let the academically less fortunate benefit from her wisdom. Joey warns Andie that adding her name to the ticket could only hurt her chances of getting elected, given her sordid family history, but Andie breezily chalks that up to being ancient history and points out that since teenagers have an attention span of two seconds, her slate is clean. She urges Joey to at least think about being on the ticket, but Joey says she'd really rather not screw up her chances of winning. As Chris and Abby hand out fliers promoting their student council candidacy, Andie tells Pacey that she's planning on running against them. Pacey asks her why in blazes she'd want to waste her time on school politics when she could be spending all of her leisure time with him, so she tells him that being class president looks great on college applications....then appoints him campaign manager and says that she needs to find a decent running mate. Jen eggs on Dawson to cut class with her so that he can experience all the joys of being a rebellious fifteen year old. He pretends he's definitely into that idea...but when she's not looking, slips into his homeroom. Mitch is over at Casa Leery, attempting to fix the leaky dishwasher. When water suddenly starts spraying everywhere, Shaggy D.A. bursts out laughing, then looks visibly turned on by the sight of Mitch removing his soaking wet t-shirt. The two stare hungrily at each other for several seconds, then start going at it...and Dawson arrives home and unwittingly walks in on them, looks visibly pleased that his parents are about to bump uglies, and discreetly exits the room. Over at the Ice House, Joey asks Jack which parent he most takes after...and when he swiftly changes the subject in lieu of answering, Joey calls him out on the weird way he gets whenever she brings up the topic of his family. A few seconds later, Abby enters the restaurant (with Chris Wolfe in tow) and snappishly asks for a couple of menus. Jack urges Joey to strongly consider being Andie's running mate 'cause of what a born leader she is...and Abby, who's eavesdropping on their conversation, chuckles dismissively, calls Joey "a born loser" whose existence is depressing and meager, then warns that if she enters the race she'll only embarrass herself and her family. Joey responds to the catty bitchitude by pouring a pitcher of cold water on Abby's head, to which Abby reacts by shrieking, "You're dead!" and storming out. As Chris toddles after her, Joey turns her attention back to Jack and says, "Tell Andie I'm in." The next day, Pacey tells Andie he's been doing some reading on Bill Clinton and warns that, since Abby is her opponent, the campaign is likely to get ugly. Andie reacts by happily telling him she's impressed that he's been doing campaign-related research, gives him a thank you kiss, and firmly declares that she intends to take the high road and make "government good and safe again". Pacey marvels at the genius of her sound bytes...and the two praise each other's awesomeness and lean in for a canoodle - just as Joey storms over clutching several fliers that constitute Abby's/Chris's smear campaign against their candidacy. She says she wants to fight back, but Andie adamantly refuses to lower herself to their mudslinging tactics and insists that winning will be their best revenge. While browsing in a downtown shop, Jen tells Dawson he's in desperate need of a "regression sponsor" to help walk him back to his teen years. When Dawson resists regressing, Jen says she specifically brought him to this store so that she could pressure him to shoplift something and get him to feel the rush of thieving something trivial...like a tube of lipstick, for example. When Dawson looks appalled at the idea of breaking the law, Jen orders him to stop over-analyzing and just put the thing in his pocket. When the two depart the store, Dawson pretends to feel exhilarated by just having shoplifted - until he admits that he simply can't bring himself to steal anything from anyone and ended up putting the lipstick back. He insists he's A-OK with his adult[ish] perspective on life - but Jen argues that he's far too mature for his age and that he should allow the growing process by experiencing the joys of committing petty crimes. The Capeside High student council candidates deliver speeches about the various issues they'll have zero control over. Abby continues going down the mudslinging route and mocks Andie for being Little Miss Perky whose mother is "one shock treatment away from a permanent residence in the loony bin". As the student body looks on in mute shock, Joey snarkishly challenges Abby to stick to the issues and says that Andie's kooky mom has nothing to do with how Andie would function as class president. Abby rolls her eyes and proceeds to tell the entire school that Mama McPhee is responsible for the death of her eldest son and points out that mental illness is hereditary...and the faculty member who's been presiding over this clusterfuck of a rally finally decides to get off of his ass to tut tut Abby about her bullying. Abby responds by chuckling and claiming that she's merely expressing her concern for the safety of her fellow students, all of whom are aghast and continue to stare at her in horrified dismay. Abby then awkwardly turns the floor over to Andie, who's despondently staring into space while tears stream down her face. A few seconds later, she flees the gym...and Pacey runs out after her. Joey tells Jack that she now feels terrible for peppering him with questions about his family - but he snaps back that his family situation is complicated, and that right now he's solely concerned with talking Andie off whatever ledge she's twitching atop. Joey implores him to let her help in some way, but he growls that he doesn't want to talk about it and storms off. Pacey finds Andie crouched atop a toilet in the ladies room. He assures her that their campaign will surely weather the "scandal" the way Bill Clinton weathered his, but Andie says she hates the fact that everyone knows about her family tragedy and fears that they're all going to laugh at her. Pacey [refrains from pointing out that anyone who'd laugh about the death of her brother and the mind-altering effect it's had on her mother would be a psychotic prick to say the least, then] tells her that everyone's family is dysfunctional to some degree. Andie rails that politics used to mean something, and Pacey reminds her that, at the end of the day, this is just a high school election...and also thinks that the whole thing will quickly blow over by tomorrow. Andie paces as she frenetically rails about her need for order and balance, and Pacey chides her for being too hard on herself and says there's really no such thing as normal. Andie chews on that as she stares at her reflection in the mirror, laments what a tearstained mess she is, then screeches, "I really hate this!" and throws the hardcover book she's holding at the mirror, shattering it. Yeesh. Dawson drops by Mitch's loft apartment and says he happened to witness the amorousness between him and Shaggy D.A. the other day. Mitch tells him that that situation is complicated, and that he's not exactly comfortable talking to his son about it. Dawson assures him he's A-OK with their recoupling, and is even fine with him staying overnight at the house after future booty calls. Mitch firmly states that his impromptu boning of Shaggy D.A. was less a reconciliation than it was a sex slip, and that they fell back into something familiar and easy. He adds that he no longer wants to take the risk of finding himself in that kind of predicament anymore, then makes it clear to Dawson that the sex didn't change anything about his and Shaggy D.A.'s separate living arrangement. Dawson drops by Jen's house to admit that he now recognizes he has perception disorder, then starts nattering about how his boy-man brain is in constant conflict with his teenage emotions, which always seem to take a long time to kick in. He says he's open to engaging in some reckless teenage antics and yearns for the nonsensical, and Jen says that since being a foolhardy youngster is right up her alley, she'd be more than happy to help him develop a distinct devil-may-care attitude about life, law, and order. Andie is sitting in a rocking chair, despondently staring out the window, when Jack enters her bedroom, points out that her highs and lows seem pretty intense these days, and suggests she go back on her meds. Andie tells him she's fine, says she just had a rough day, and insists that she doesn't need medication. After TPing a house, Dawson and Jen flee to a nearby lake, where Jen suggests he drop his pants and go skinny dipping. As Dawson whines that it's too cold out and that he doesn't want to swim alone, Jen quickly strips off her clothes and then runs into the water. Dawson takes a more modest approach: hiding behind foliage as he strips off his clothes and then wades into the lake. The two playfully splash each other...and when Jen admits that she has naughty dreams about him from time to time, he responds by leaning in for a kiss. Jen's all 'the hell?' and chides him for crossing a line, and he scrunches his face confusedly and says he figured she'd welcome a kiss, given that she's been coming onto him pretty hard ever since he hooked up with Joey. Jen explains that since they're finally back to being close pals, she doesn't want either of them to do anything to mess that up. Chris and Abby are campaigning over the school's PA system...and by campaigning, I mean that Abby is openly mocking her opponents for being losers, and asks if anyone out there really wants anyone but her or Chris running the school - even though it's the salaried administration that actually runs the school. When it's Andie's turn to speak, she decides she can't do it after all and flees the room...and Pacey asks Abby what her fuckin' deal is, covertly turns the microphone back on, and asks her to explain in detail why she's slumming it as a VP pick when everyone can clearly see that she's the brains behind hers and Chris's campaign. Abby chortles and admits that she's merely using "that walking penis" for his popularity, and that she'll ultimately destroy him the way she destroyed Andie. As her cartoonishly evil rhetoric is broadcasted throughout the entire school, she smugly declares that victory is easy when one has no qualms about walking atop other people to get it...and that, if anyone's actually dumb enough to vote for her after witnessing the astonishing cruelty she lobbed at Andie during the rally, she plans to rule this school like a malevolent dictator. She then gets all in Pacey's face as she bitchily adds, "And you and all those other halfwits are too stupid to stop me." Pacey gleefully reveals that he purposely pressed the on button just now to broadcast her "annoying nasal whine" to the entire school...and she's all, "Wuh?" then helplessly stares into space with an expression of sheepish disbelief etched across her face. Shaggy D.A. informs Dawson that Mitch served her with divorce papers this morning. She assures him she's fine, then continues with her frenzied housecleaning. Jack apologizes to Joey for being so snappish to her after the campaign rally and says that, in his defense, it's been a tough few days. Joey gently chides him for shutting her out, so he tells her how difficult he finds it to open up to a non-family member, and that he's always so heavily burdened by how much his mom and sister depend on him. Joey says she totally gets that, and tells him that when her mom was dying, her best friend [who shall not be named, but whose name rhymes with Lawson], comforted her by simply sitting beside her and quietly holding her hand. Jack chews on that for a few seconds before reaching for her hand, and then the two amble down the street together, hand in hand. Pacey calls Andie to invite her out for the evening, and she tearfully tells him she's not up to it, but promises to be back to her normal self tomorrow. As that's happening, she tearfully stares at a bottle of Xanax that's been prescribed to her, and takes a couple of pills. Dawson drops by Jen's place to tell his "regression sponsor" that his parents are divorcing, and that he's been living in denial about that situation 'cause of how hopeful he was that they'd reconcile. He wonders aloud if he should allow himself to feel the pain and shock that a normal fifteen year old would feel when his parents are on the verge of divorcing...then finally decides to let his raw emotions win out. He starts weeping and thanks Jen for being there for him, and she gives him a comforting hug and thanks him for allowing her to be there for him. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: Pacey is over at Dawson's, complaining about how boooooored he is having to watch Mr. Smith Goes to Washington and reminds Dawson that the local video rental place has all of the latest releases available. Dawson insists that the film is a classic...and a few seconds later, Jen climbs in through his bedroom window, drunkenly staggers over to his bed, and mumbles that she's in desperate need of a place to crash. A dismayed Dawson tells Pacey that this is the third drunken Jen visitation he's had this week. Jen sits up for a moment and says she may have to throw up...but when Dawson shoves his garbage can under her nose so she doesn't vomit all over his sheets, she says it was a false alarm and promptly passes out. Dawson worriedly tells Pacey that Jen is spiraling out control and that he has no idea how to help her. The next morning, Mitch returns to Casa Leery to pack up more of his stuff. He asks Dawson to help him settle into his new digs after school, then suggests they get a bite to eat afterwards and make the outing "like a friend thing". Dawson snarks that he has actual friends to do friend things with and makes it clear how much he haaaaates this marital separation. Mitch says he totally gets why he's pissed off at him, but insists that this new living arrangement is his decision. He then hands Dawson a piece of mail he received earlier, and Dawson opens it as he heads off to school and looks excited about some very happy news. The school guidance counsellor tells Pacey, with openly amused disdain, that his grades and his general aptitude suck, and that, "Most people with your academic record can't walk upright." LOL. Pacey asks what his options are, so the counsellor tells him he can/should enroll in summer school, maybe repeat the school year, then expect to be on welfare for his entire adult life. Dawson finds Joey in the hall and tells her they won the Boston Film Festival (the junior film division) and excitedly adds that the award comes with a check for $2,500 to put towards their next project. Joey looks less than thrilled by the prospect of having to work on another wretched Dawson production, so she pretends she's waaaay too busy with school and her art classes...and Dawson looks visibly deflated by her lack of interest in his good fortune, but then pretends he's A-OK with creating his next moving pictures masterpiece without her. Jack tells Joey he really wants to make things right with her, explains that he only kissed her during the Full Moon Rising episode 'cause the full moon made him, then apologizes for his presumptuousness and hopes she'll stop being so cold to him so they can go back to being friends. Joey tells him she's not deliberately being cold to him and concedes that she's more mad at herself for not rebuffing his lips. Jack looks relieved and tells her to get over her self anger already 'cause, for some God-only-knows-why reason, he misses hanging out with her. At lunchtime in the cafeteria, Dawson is tapping away at his laptop when Jen seats herself at his table. He shows her the letter and the $2,500 check he received from the Boston Film Festival, and she says she's proud of him and is honored to have been the leading lady in his swamp creature flick. Pacey tells Andie how disastrously his session went with the guidance counsellor, so she rails - within hearing range of everyone in the cafeteria - about the nerve of that jerkwad writing him off so quickly, and points out that a hapless teenage dumbfuck such as himself needs to be rescued not ridiculed. Chris and a fugly friend amble over to where Jen and Dawson are sitting and cackle at Jen about how totes awesome last night's alcohol-fueled sexfest was. She says she recuperates well after such nights of debauchery, and Chris gives Jen a creepy shoulder rub while declaring his mission to "party until breakfast" ... and Jen tells him she's definitely into doing that all over again. After Chris and Fugly saunter off, Dawson asks Jen what in blazes she's doing boozing and sexing with those lecherous cretins...and she chides him for sanctimoniously lecturing her about her partying, and assures him that she's not so much out of control as she is indulging in fun sexcapades while recklessly abusing alcohol. Andie tells Pacey he should prolly be a lot more nervous about his dismal future - but Pacey argues that, on the contrary, he's relieved that the school's guidance counsellor has officially declared him the village idiot. Andie tells him she's not indulging his pity party and points out that he can always reinvent himself as a non-wisecracking dolt...and when Pacey tells her he has no idea how to live like that, Andie advises him to start from the inside and says that heroes are made, not born. Elsewhere in the cafeteria, Jack asks Joey out on a dat (an abbreviated version of a full-fledged date), and suggests they steer away from convention and make up their own rules for the evening, the most important being: have fun. Joey decides 'sure, why the hell not?', so then Jack makes a beeline over to where Andie and Pacey are sitting and happily announces that he has a dat with Joey tonight. Andie tells him that she and Pacey have plans to study at their place tonight, and that she's confident that their mom will be acting far less squirrelly than usual now that her new meds have kicked in. Joey is at home primping for her dat when Dawson stops by to give her a check for half of the $2,500 film festival prize money. When she half-heartedly tells him she can't accept it, he insists that she deserves it for helping produce his film...and Joey mulls that over and says she really could use the money, then thanks him and says she hopes they can get back to acting totally normal with each other. When she asks him what his next movie is going to be about, he summarizes the overplayed story arc: boy meets girl, loses girl, gets girl back. A few seconds later, Jack arrives to pick up Joey for their dat, and Dawson looks less than thrilled that the two are spending the evening together. Dawson helps Mitch unpack his stuff and settle into his new loft apartment...and when he tries to rush off, Mitch suggests they hang out for awhile as regular dudes and chat about what's going on in his life. Dawson sourly retorts that Joey dumped him and appears to be falling for another guy, and that Jen is drunk all the time. When he inches towards the door, Mitch asks him to please respect his wish to want to be separated from Shaggy D.A., and Dawson angrily says he's soooo sick and tired of having to respect the shitty-for-him wishes of other people. Mitch gently explains that, since the world doesn't revolve around him, other people's life decisions aren't necessarily intended to upset him...then hands him a key to the loft and tells him to think of this place as his. Dawson bitchily retorts that he wants a father, not a friend or buddy, then asks if he can respect that, and Mitch replies, "I guess I'll have to." Dawson drops by Jen's place to tell her that he's up for a night of debauchery after all, and Jen correctly assumes that he had a change of heart 'cause of a bad run-in with Joey. She says he's welcome to partake in tonight's drunkfest - but only if he doesn't act like his usual uppity-judgey self about how self-destructively she likes to party. She then clarifies that this is, in no way, a date 'cause he's way too far gone after Joey's dumping of him to even to be considered an acceptable rebound. When Dawson and Jen arrive at Casa Wolfe, Dawson wanders around and looks less than impressed by the crowd of partygoers. They're soon greeted by Chris and Fugly, who invite the two to come inside to dance. Jen takes them up on it, while Dawson opts to remain outdoors and sadly wander about. When Pacey arrives at Andie's house for a night of studying, Mama McPhee offers to make them something to eat and tells them that if they need help with their schoolwork, Tim's favorite subject is U.S. history. Pacey discreetly asks Andie whaddup with her mom not remembering that Tim is no longer among the living, so Andie explains that she mostly lives in reality - but slips sometimes. She then brings Pacey into her room, and he's visibly impressed by the various ribbons, awards, and trophies she's won over the years and marvels that she somehow finds the time to rescue him. She shrugs and replies, "You do what you gotta do", then warns him that he's facing academic disaster and needs to buckle down asap if he has a hope in hell of graduating from high school. Joey and Jack are enjoying a picnic in the park and watching a lightning storm break out in the distance. Jack says he nearly got hit by lightning once, thought it was amazing, and describes it as "nature's version of performance art". Joey starts nattering about how she and Dawson once tried to replicate Ben Franklin's experiment using a kite and key, and Jack grumbles about her bringing up her ex-boyfriend while on their dat. Joey apologizes, then continues to babble about Dawson, for whom everything is a movie: the good guy punches the bad guy for stealing his girl. Jack chews on that for a few seconds and says that he too would be angry if he let a hottie such as herself slip through his fingers. Back at the party house, Chris tells Dawson that Jen is a good party friend to have, admits that, yeah, he's a total pig when it comes to indiscriminately having sex with whoever's drunk or willing, then sashays over to where Jen is chatting with Fugly. Andie tries to explain to Pacey the art of highlighting important passages as a helpful study technique, but he just stares back at her blankly 'cause it doesn't look as though the general concept of book learning seems to be getting through. A few seconds later, Andie gets a phone call from the nearby Mollie Market, where apparently her mother has wandered off to while wearing her bathrobe, and is now mumbling incoherently to customers. Andie tells the clerk she'll be right there, and then both she and Pacey rush off. The Mollie's Market clerk snappishly reminds Andie that this is now the third time this has happened, then warns that if she can't keep her spaced-out mom out of her store, she's going to call the police. Andie approaches her mom and urges her to leave with her pronto, but Mama McPhee insists on finishing her grocery shopping. Pacey steps in and "helps" her shop by putting a few grocery items into her shopping basket, and she lights up and smilingly tells him she has turkey and roast beef in her fridge at home. Pacey says that that sounds like the makings of a delicious club sandwich and asks her if she wouldn't mind making him one, and she tells him she'd be delighted, then sadly leans against him as he escorts her out of the store. When Dawson notices an inebriated Jen heading upstairs with Chris and Fugly, he's all, "Not on my watch!" and follows the trio, bursts into Chris's bedroom, and interrupts what looks like a date rapey ménage à trois about to unfold. Dawson picks Jen up and slings her over his shoulder while hastily exiting the house...and when he puts her down, she rails at him for pulling the plug on her good time. He points out that engaging in a threesome with Chris and his fugly friend cannot possibly constitute a good time - OMFG, right? - and Jen suddenly gets hit with a wave of nausea from all the boozing she's been doing and leans over the Wolfe's white picket fence and vomits. She tearfully implores Dawson to accept her general inability to make intelligent life decisions, along with the fact that there are people in the world who don't need saving...and after the two bicker back and forth about their respective unhappiness, Jen softens and marvels at how special he is for his innate sense of hope and optimism. Dawson wanks her about how she too is special, gives her a hug, and offers to take her somewhere that isn't either of their houses. Joey tells Jack that she had a unique night of fun, kisses him goodnight, and says she'd be into them hanging out again some time. After putting Mama McPhee to bed, Andie gushes to Pacey about the spectacular way he helped her tonight and that she's very proud of him. Pacey says he's not used to people using glowing words with respect to his behavior, then suggests they head upstairs. When Andie perks up at that and flirtily asks him what he had in mind, he primly reminds her that they still have three chapters to read for their study session...and Andie grins approvingly as the two head up to her room to hit the books. Dawson brings Jen over to Mitch's loft apartment so she can sleep off her hangover. He explains to his dad that he's been very hard on him lately 'cause of how larger-than-life he considers him to be, and Mitch points out that it's impossible for anyone to live up to a big screen image that doesn't exist. Not to mention that, for a grown man, he generally comes off as an immature bonehead. Mitch reminds Dawson that people are flawed and that he's happy to be his father...and his friend, if he'll let him. Dawson chews on that prospect for a few seconds, then says he's becoming more open to the two of them exploring the friends route. When Dawson brings Jen a glass of water, she calls him her hero - but he insists he's merely trying to be a good friend. She asks him what his new movie is about, so he describes it as a tale of two star-crossed lovers whose fate hasn't yet been determined 'cause he hasn't finished writing the script. Jen urges him to consider avoiding the stereotypical happy ending 'cause they're "bogus and unrealistic" and points out that most things in life don't end happily. Joey climbs into Dawson's bedroom window and looks disappointed to find the room empty. She sits atop his bed for a moment, stares contemplatively into space for a few seconds, then climbs back out of the window and down the ladder. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! Recap: Dawson finishes watching a sad movie with Shaggy D.A. ... and as she sniffles and blows her nose, he tells her he’s very concerned about how sad she always is lately. Shaggy D.A. says she's sniffling 'cause of the movie's sad ending and that she’s far more concerned about the fact that he hasn’t adequately wallowed over his breakup with Joey. Dawson shrugs and says it doesn’t help to wallow - but Shaggy D.A. insists that it’s important to fully grieve getting dumped. She then heads off to bed, leaving Dawson staring longingly at the open window where Joey used to climb in instead of just entering through the front door like a normal person. Mr. Peterson, Capeside High’s English teacher who makes no effort to hide the utter contempt he has for his students, tells the class (while coughing incessantly) that tomorrow’s midterm exam will be worth 50% of their grade, and warns that it’s going to cover everything they’ve studied this term. After class is dismissed, Joey tries to talk to Dawson...and when he bitchily tells her to go away ‘cause he’s giving her the space she said she wanted, she says she didn’t realize this meant he’d pout like a sulky girl-child and refuse to talk to her at all. During lunch in the cafeteria, Andie shows Pacey the self-administered purity test that’s in a magazine she’s currently reading and that she'd like him to take the test so she can have a general idea of how much sexual expertise he has. Pacey declines, then gives her the strong impression that his purity could give driven snow a run for its money. Chris Wolfe flirts with Jen by the outdoor track during gym class. He asks her why she’s not more receptive to his wily charms, and Jen says it’s prolly ‘cause he flirts with every girl in his orbit. When he gives up trying to charm her (for now) and saunters off, Dawson wanders over and warns Jen that Chris is a love ‘em and leave ‘em kind of guy, then mentions that a bunch of kids are meeting with Mr. Peterson for a study session in order to prepare for the English midterm. Jen mulls that over and promises to consider tagging along. Mr. Peterson leaves a note pinned to his classroom door saying he’s too sick to make it to the study session, but that the midterm exam is still on for tomorrow. Chris suggests to Jen they organize their own study group at his house and adds that his parents are away. Jen points out how unlikely it is that they’d get much studying done there, and he’s like, “No duh, but it’ll be fun hanging out in my rich parents’ house” and tells her to invite the rest of her castmates. When Pacey hears about Chris’s invitation, he cackles gleefully to Andie about how awesome it’ll be to hang out in a rich person’s house, and Andie decides that this sounds like a reasonable study plan and says she too is in. Andie runs into Joey and invites her along to the study session, and Joey chuckles about the notion that a slacker like Chris Wolfe could possibly provide them with a suitable study environment - but Andie assures her that she plans on taking control of the operation and enforce a strict study regimen. While that’s happening, Pacey invites Dawson to attend the study session...and as they pile into Chris’s SUV, Dawson’s all, “Ack!” when he sees that Joey is in the back seat with Andie. Chris drives everyone to his parents’ luxury estate, ushers them inside the house, and assures everyone that his young, bespectacled sister Dina is going to stay out of their way and definitely not embarrass herself by openly crushing on Dawson. As Joey expresses serious doubt about how much studying they’re actually going to get done, Andie instructs Chris to direct them to a room with a large enough table to accommodate all of them, and which has proper lighting and comfortable chairs. When she notices that Pacey is MIA, she finds him in a nearby room watching satellite TV and marveling about the 200+ channels that are every couch potato’s dream. Andie chides him for undermining her efforts as the group's self-appointed study captain and asks for his help rounding everyone up and getting them to start hitting the books. As everyone settles into the large dining room, Andie outlines the night-long study plan, adding that if all goes well they should be able to cover the entire course load by midnight. The group responds by immediately suspending anything resembling studying to order a pizza...and Chris selects a bottle of wine from his parents’ wine cabinet while telling Jen he’s very bothered that she always seems to assume the worst of him. When Jen reminds him of his infamously slutty reputation, he deflects by telling her they’re a lot alike and that she should take the time to get to know him. Jen mulls that over for a few seconds, goes, “Deal”, and the two shake on it. After a lightning round of literature trivia led by Andie, during which Joey is studiously earnest and Dawson continues to sulk, Chris announces that it’s time for another break, and the gang agrees that they all want to take the purity test Andie had shown Pacey earlier. After everyone answers 100 questions (which seems ridiculously lengthy for a magazine sex survey), they each tally their score. As Joey openly contemplates the question ‘have you ever been in love?’, she bolts from the room when Dawson stares over at her wistfully. When he rushes out after her, she reminds him that she asked for space and time and would appreciate it if he could refrain from staring at her wistfully all the time and following her from room to room. A few seconds later, Dina appears out of nowhere and orders Dawson to fill her in on the details of his relationship with Joey, but he’s like, “No. Go away.” When all the purity test results have been tallied, Andie emerges as the purest while Chris Wolfe is the least pure. When Pacey is called out for not submitting his test results, Chris smirkingly asks him how he answered question #16: ‘have you ever boned anyone twice your age?’ Chris cackles about how Pacey “laid the pipe” with Tamara, and a stunned Andie’s all, “Wha-a-at?!” and tells Pacey she’s miffed at him for misleading her earlier by referring to himself as “embarrassingly pure”. She flees the room, and Pacey rushes out after her. Dawson finds Chris preparing the pool house for a romantic tête-à-tête with Jen, and is pretty open about his intention to get her in the sack. Dawson tells him that Jen is kinda vulnerable at the moment and asks him to maybe not exploit that for the sake of his penile pleasuring, but Chris shrugs unconcernedly and says he’s not going to do anything that Jen won’t want to do...and smarmily adds that if he notices that his bedroom light has been turned off, it’s a clear sign that he and Jen are bumping uglies. As Joey studies while curled up in a sofa chair, Jen rifles through a pile of bikinis (the Wolfe family makes available to guests who didn’t bring a swimsuit) in order to go hot tubbing with Chris. She tells Joey she’s sorry about her breakup with Dawson...and when Joey snappishly replies that she doesn’t believe she's being sincere, Jen says it’s become clear to her that the reason they aren’t friends is less because of their competition for Dawson’s affections [incredulous as that is to comprehend] than it is because of what a total bitch she is. Joey contritely dials back her bitchitude and apologizes for being so harsh, then grumbles about how tired she is of always having to talk about her feelings with the mind-numbingly over-engineered dialogue the Dawson's Creek writers loved to pack into every script. Andie is moping on a swing in the backyard when Pacey ambles over. She asks him why he never told her about nailing Tamara and, more importantly, how he could possibly do something so gross. He mumbles about how it wasn’t an easy thing to confess to someone as straight-laced as her...but that, at the end of the day, it was just sex. A thoroughly icked-out Andie says she really doesn’t want to hear anymore about it, and Pacey reminds her that as humans they’re all sexual creatures, and that his and Tamara’s Season 1 pedo-on-boy sexcapades really shouldn’t change the way she feels about him. When Chris announces to Jen that he’s ready for some sexy time in the hot tub, Dawson pulls Jen aside and tells her he’s worried that Chris doesn’t have the best of intentions, and that he has it on good authority that his main goal is to go to bed with her. Jen’s like, “No duh, I kind of assumed that” ... then gives him a conspiratorial grin and says that just ‘cause the guy has a master plan doesn’t mean she’s obliged to go along with it. Even though she ends up doing exactly that. As she scampers off to the hot tub, Dina holds up Joey’s purity test result and tells Dawson that, according to Joey, she’s been in love twice. Dawson’s all, “Wuh??” and demands to see the test for himself, but Dina refuses until he gives her a kiss. He responds by staring back at her with perplexed horror. Over in the hot tub, Chris tells Jen he just wants to have fun, then pretends he's totes OK with her not wanting to mess around. She coquettishly asks him what his idea of fun is, and he answers by giving her a big smooch. She grins and assures him that they’re on the same page, and then he leans in for a series of intense looking smooches. While Joey tries to study, Dawson stares at her longingly and sadly moans about how he thought what they had together was special. He then asks her if it’s really true that she’s been in love twice, cites Dina’s revealing of her purity test result, and asks at what point in her life she had time to obsessively moon over a guy who wasn’t him. Joey declines to answer and says that for now she’d like for them to just be friends, and Dawson pissily says he doesn’t want her platonic friendship. When Joey storms off, Dina appears, claps her hands, and calls the interaction she just eavesdropped on very emotional. Dawson grumbles, “Go away”, then starts railing at her about how a boy-on-girl kiss comes with a lot of emotion and that she shouldn’t want to rush it. Dina reacts by bursting into tears and running off...and Joey, who’s still within earshot, shoots him a ‘the fuck?’ glare. After absorbing that stink-eye, he suddenly notices that Chris and Jen have departed the hot tub and that Chris’s bedroom light is off. He reacts by burying his face in his hands. Joey tiptoes into Dina’s bedroom and explains that Dawson was mean to her just now ‘cause generally all boys are mean. Dina declares that she wants to avoid growing up, and Joey agrees that that sounds like a great plan, ‘cause growing up sucks the more it becomes clear that boys don’t live up to even the basest of expectations. She then back pedals and assures the imp that sometimes love and romance fall together perfectly and create moments that make the pain of growing up totally worth it. Dawson sits alone on the porch and does his best to juggle studying while continuing to silently mope about Joey giving him the dumperoo. The next morning, Dawson wakes up at 6am, mutters, “Oh shit..” and rushes around to find the others. When Andie wakes up and checks the time, she panics and is all, “Ack! We only have four hours before the midterm!” Jen wakes up in Chris’s bed, and he coldly thanks her for last night’s orgasmic romp, says he’ll meet her downstairs, and beats a hasty retreat. Classy, Chris. Things get serious [and seriously out of whack] when Pacey takes it upon himself to lead the study group for an intense cram session, which entails the group shooting literature-related questions at one another. Hours later, Pacey declares the session over, and to celebrate they all race outside and leap into the Wolfe’s swimming pool while fully clothed...and I wonder if this is the wisest thing to be doing when time is of the essence, and none of them (save for Chris) has a change of dry clothes on hand. Andie tells Pacey that she’s delighted with him for taking control of the study session, then explains that she was shocked, appalled, and thoroughly icked out to learn of his boning of Tamara...which is awkward, since she, on the other hand, is so inexperienced. Pacey assures her that one day (soon?) she’ll acquire a sexual history, and the two concur that they each love to hate the other, then indulge in a smooch. Dawson tells Joey he wishes he could take back their first kiss ‘cause maybe they’d still be best friends...but then he thinks about all the wonderful things that the kiss has brought into his life and realizes that the pain of losing her was probably worth it. Joey explains that when she took the purity test, the “two” people she’s been in love with were him ‘cause she fell in love with him twice, each time with a different version of him. [That's some pretty strange logic, but OK.] She then assures him that she’s unsure of herself not him...and he promises to give her her space without being a snide little bitch like he’s been acting like all episode. Dawson finds Dina sleeping on the couch and grants her wish by leaning down and kissing her forehead. After he exits the room, Dina opens her eyes and grins happily. Everyone piles into Chris’s SUV and heads off to school...but when they get there, Mr. Peterson has left them another note, telling them he called in sick for a second day and that the midterm exam is on for tomorrow. As everyone groans in exhausted relief, Pacey suggests an activity he’s pretty sure everyone can get on board with: taking a group nap on the football field. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! Recap: While watching Footloose in Dawson's bedroom, Andie jigs - not unlike the Footloose dorks - and squeals about how excited she is about the upcoming homecoming dance. Pacey, Dawson, and Joey are all, "Meh.." and tell her they think school-sponsored events are too uncool for their sensibilities and are therefore not worth attending. An appalled Andie calls them cynics who are not going to have any fun high school memories years from now, then saucily points out that dancing can serve as foreplay (the way it did on Footloose)...and Pacey perks up at the prospect of foreplay and says he definitely likes the way she thinks. As Bessie is dropping Joey off at school, Joey spills the beans about Jack kissing her and laments how she can't gab about it to Dawson: the boyfriend the way she could with Dawson: the platonic friend. Bessie concurs that it'd definitely be a bad idea to confide in Dawson about the illicit kiss, then breezily tells her it's no big deal and advises her to put it behind her and pretend as though it never happened...'cause, frankly, she's much too busy with her own life problems to seriously give a fuck. Jen and Abby are watching Kristy [with her allegedly fake hooters] drag her football player boyfriend (Brett) away from his friends. Abby remarks that she'd loooove to make a play for Brett, and Jen makes a blech face and is like, "You're on your own with that." In the next scene, Brett is berating Kristy for pulling him away from his friends just now, and she snaps back that she'd appreciate it if he'd acknowledge her whenever she enters his orbit. Dawson gives Joey an amused WTF? look and makes her promise that they'll never publicly air their problems like that...'cause, yeesh, what an embarrassing spectacle [that will be when they do it later in the episode]. The two then discuss the homecoming dance, which Andie has convinced them to attend, and Joey quips that she's mostly going 'cause dancing can end in "tawdry smut action". A few seconds later, Jen ambles by with Abby, who snarls at Dawson to "wipe the drool" ... and as Dawson stares after her perplexedly, Joey says she doesn't like the idea of Jen and Abby being so chummy and suggests they put some distance between the two by inviting Jen to come to the dance with their little clique. She then spots Jack at the end of the hall and abruptly rushes off in the opposite direction. Andie tells Pacey and Dawson that she'd like to invite Jack to attend the dance with them 'cause he's kind of a shy loner, and Dawson perks up at that idea and suggests setting him up with Jen. Pacey argues that that sounds like a recipe for disaster, but Andie ignores him and says she'll extend an invitation to Jack asap. When Dawson returns home from school, Mitch and Shaggy D.A. sit him down on the front porch and inform him that they've officially decided to separate. A crestfallen looking Dawson says he'd prefer them to return to counselling and/or plan more family outings - but Mitch makes it clear that they're not open to his suggestions and that they've firmly reached this conclusion. Dawson growls, "Your conclusion sucks!" and storms inside the house. While waiting downtown to meet Pacey, Andie tells Jack she's looking forward to a rare night off from worrying about their wacky mom. She then tells Jack that maybe he'll meet the woman of his dreams at the dance - just as Pacey arrives to pick them up in his brother's police car...which can't possibly be legal, even in podunk Capeside. Mitch packs an overnight bag, tosses it into the trunk of his car, and tells Shaggy he's off to go live at the local motel. As she stares back at him sadly, he reminds her that their separation is only temporary and that she can call him whenever she wants. She sobs as he drives away, while Dawson stonily watches from his bedroom window. Dawson tells Shaggy D.A. he's off to the homecoming dance...then notices how sad she is and offers to stay home so they can spend the evening moping together. Shaggy D.A. assures him she's fine and urges him to go to the dance and have a good time with his friends. Homecoming dance! Joey and Dawson arrive at the school and quickly meet up with Pacey, Andie, and Jack. A few seconds later, Jen ambles over and is introduced to Jack for the first...which seems weird, 'cause I would have figured in a small town high school, the two would already be well acquainted with one another. Following that is a lot of superfluous footage of the Capeside High kids jigging on the dance floor - except for Pacey, who channels his inner Willard Hewitt by stubbornly refusing to dance and watches from the sidelines. Abby struts over to Jen and greets her in a snarky-bitchy manner 'cause she has zero clue how to interact like a normal person even at the best of times. When the DJ plays a slow song, Andie urges Jen to invite Jack to dance...and Jen indulges her, then asks Jack if he too is getting the strong impression that they're being set up in a very non-subtle manner. Joey notices Jen and Jack dancing together and tells Dawson she really doesn't approve of Jack being subjected to that she-devil. A bemused Dawson asks her why she's getting so worked up, not least 'cause she was the one who suggested inviting Jen along in the first place, and she denies being worked up and says she's merely expressing an opinion. Andie implores Pacey to dance with her, but he refuses and cites his strict 'no dancing' policy. Andie vows to find someone who is willing to dance with her, and Pacey glances across the gym and looks wistfully at Kristy while she dances with Brett. Andie wanders over to Jen and Jack - just as Jen says she needs to go outside and get some air. Andie then drags Jack over to where Dawson and Joey are dancing and announces that she'd like to cut in 'cause it's too weird for her to publicly dance with her brother. Joey visibly stiffens when she begins dancing with Jack, who says he takes full responsibility for their recent smooch. She snaps back that he's only saying that 'cause he feels guilty about what he did, then storms out of the gym. Jack races after her to apologize and ask her why she's so angry - apart from her default angry disposition - so Joey chastises him for not respecting her relationship with Dawson. Jack says he doesn't buy that and suggests that maybe she's more mad at herself for kissing him back - just as Dawson suddenly appears from out of nowhere and is all, "Wuh? Kissing you baaaaack?" and scrunches his face into an expression of troubled confusion. Joey responds to the awkwardness by making a beeline over to the nearest ladies room. Abby has somehow finagled a dance with Brett, and is pressing herself against him and cooing about what a muscular hunk he is...even though: meh, not so much. Jen, meanwhile, thanks Andie for inviting her to the dance, assures her she's having a fantastic time, but really really wants to leave pronto. A few seconds later, Jack rushes over and says he's definitely ready to leave - just as Dawson storms over to confront him about the kiss conversation he just had with Joey. Jack confesses that, yep, he kissed Joey in the light of the full moon the other night, then defiantly says he'd do it again. Dawson retorts by punching him in the face and sauntering off...and, across the gym, Abby gasps in delight and visibly looks turned on by Dawson's senseless act of violence. LOL. Pacey exits the bathroom and sees Kristy moping about Brett dancing with Abby. Pacey wanders over and asks her whassup, so she tells him how annoyed she is that her boyfriend is such a flirt, and that she's bummed by his public sassing of her by dancing with a vacuous twit like Abby. An incredulous Pacey says he can think of 800 guys who, in a heartbeat, would line up to replace Brett, assures her she's super hot, and clarifies that he finds her super hot. As Kristy blushingly digests the series of compliments about her hotness, she invites him to slow dance with her in the hall, and he's more than happy to oblige. Mitch is eating takeout in his motel room while Shaggy D.A. sits alone in her kitchen and eats ice cream. Mitch calls her to report the various TV channels he has access to at the motel, and Shaggy D.A. remarks on how big their house is when she's alone inside of it. He replies that right now the house is too small for the both of them, and she reminds him that the front door is always open to him. She then ends the call, and the two dullards stare sadly into space. Andie catches Pacey slow dancing with Kristy in the hall and gives him a 'the fuck? I thought you didn't dance' glare before running off. Pacey stares after her looking sheepish. Joey follows Dawson as he storms out of the school and tries to explain that Jack was the one who kissed her, and adds that, yeah, it's true she didn't do anything to stop him...but that he shouldn't blow it completely out of proportion. Dawson pissily retorts that there's no justifiable reason for her to be receptive to a kiss from Jack after she's been coveting the idea of a Joey/Dawson hookup for so many years. Joey's like, "This is about me, not you" ... which leads to an embarrassing bickerfest that draws the attention of everyone within earshot. Dawson suddenly looks horrified by the Kristy/Brett-esque spectacle he's making of himself and bolts. While walking Jen home, Jack says he's generally a sucker for lost causes, e.g. his crush on Joey (or, um - gay spoiler - any girl), and Jen thanks him for doing such a good job of hiding how much he would have rather been on the dance floor with someone else. Mitch drives over to Casa Leery, sees Shaggy D.A. wandering past the window looking sad, then drives off. Not sure what the point of that drive-by was. Pacey finds Andie moping by the docks and tells her he's been looking everywhere for her. Andie calls him out on close dancing with Kristy after declaring several times that he doesn't dance, but then concedes that since they're not boyfriend/girlfriend, he really doesn't owe her any explanation. Pacey says he had a great time with her tonight...then admits to getting swept up in the moment when he ran into a tearful Kristy, and describes their slow dance as a fantasy he couldn't help himself from wanting to act out. When Andie sadly murmurs that she had been trying to do that all night, an incredulous Pacey asks her why she's remotely interested in a fucktarded screwup such as himself. Andie's like, "Dunno", then tells him he's funny, kind to her, and didn't run screaming after meeting her unstable mother. She wanks him further about how sharp, witty, and brilliant he is, then adds that these compliments are soooo much more than he deserves at this moment. Pacey sheepishly says he's truly sorry for carrying on with Kristy, and that it's now obvious to him that he danced with the wrong person. Andie blushes at that revelation, observes that the two of them are currently "having a moment" of their own, and happily accepts his invitation to slow dance. Dawson returns home and finds Joey waiting for him in his bedroom. She tells him she's sooooo sorry, has no idea why she's been pulling away from him since they officially coupled up, then natters something or other about needing to figure out who she is, what her future holds, and what she wants to accomplish in life...and specifies that she really really needs to explore this journey of self-discovery on her own. An anguished Dawson asks what she's saying before blurting out, "I love you!" Joey returns the sentiment, but declines to kiss him when he looks like he's about to lean in for a smooch. He miserably wails, "How can it be oooooover?!" and Joey just shrugs and is all, "I gotta go" and climbs out the window and down the ladder. Dawson rushes over to the window to watch her run off into the night, then angrily shoves the ladder so it crashes to the ground. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! Recap: Dawson and Joey are sitting on the roof just outside his bedroom window and are staring up at the full moon. Joey remarks on all the weird shit that's going to happen throughout this episode purely 'cause of the full moon, and Dawson chides her for being superstitious and then pretends to slip and nearly tumble towards the roof's edge. Joey responds by shooting him the stink-eye and muttering, "Very funny." Downtown the next morning, Tamara [ack! I thought she left town at the end of the previous episode] tells Mitch she really really hopes he buys her warehouse 'cause she's extremely desperate to get out of Capeside. Mitch promises to make a decision soon. Elsewhere downtown, Jen runs into Vincent, who asks where her "evil other half" is, so she quips that she and Abby are trying a trial separation. Vincent tells her he's been out at sea with a group of gross men for the last two and a half weeks and would really really like someone cute to show him around Capeside and be able to carry on a conversation without grunting, farting, or dropping expletives. Jen agrees that it's her civic duty to provide him with a tour of Capeside, then gives him her address and tells him he can pick her up at 7:30pm. Andie enters the video rental place where Pacey works and catches him watching Jacuzzi Floozies on the TV behind the desk. He proposes to Andie that, since they like to spar with each other so much, they should go out on a date sometime...and Andie tries to look as casual as possible by the invitation and mutters, "Yeah OK." He suggests they go to a movie so they can cut down on the sparring and offers to pick her up at her house - but she starts twitching and says she'd prefer it if they met downtown. Jen is shopping for makeup when Abby enters the store and asks her if she's still mad at her, and Jen's like, "Well d'yuh" and reminds her she called her a desperate loser. Abby, who starts brazenly shoplifting and somehow isn't caught or even called out on it, assures Jen she's A-OK with Vincent liking her...but when Jen says that that's good 'cause she and Vincent have plans to go out tonight, Abby snarls, "You bitch!" and accuses her of stealing her man. Jen points out that Vincent barely knows she exists and exits the store, and Abby chases after her and bitchily declares that Vincent is only interested in her 'cause he knows an easy lay when he sees one. Jen responds by slapping her hard across the face and screeching, "Don't ever talk to me again!" As Joey and Dawson study in the Casa Leery kitchen, Shaggy D.A. tells Mitch she's having a visiting reporter over for dinner tonight. Mitch is all, "The fuck? That sounds like a Thursday thing, and it's Saturday!" and says he's monumentally pissed off by the prospect of her entertaining a male co-worker, then invokes the Season 1 cuckolding and snaps, "I wonder why!" Shaggy D.A. shoots back, "At least I have co-workers" and makes clear that she's insulting his unemployed bum status...and Joey decides it's time for her to flee this awkwardness and go home now. In the foyer, Dawson whimpers to her about how skeered he is about the escalation of his parents' fighting, but she breezily chalks it up to the full moon. After she leaves, Dawson tries to talk to his dad about all the tension, but Mitch snaps, "Not now!" and storms up the stairs. Abby drops by Jen's house as Jen is primping for her date with Vincent. She admonishes Jen for smacking her across the face, but Jen insists she had it coming when she called her a slut. Abby concedes that, yeah, she's a mean-spirited name-caller - but points out that she hasn't yet resorted to face-smacking. Jen calls her warped and snarls at her to go home 'cause Vincent is coming by any moment to pick her up. Tamara arrives at Casa Leery to implore Mitch to pleeeeeease buy her damn warehouse already, and Shaggy D.A.'s all, "Don't I know you from when you were accused of nailing Pacey in Season 1?" and shoots her a sanctimoniously judgmental stink-eye as if she herself is a total saint when it comes to hurtful sexcapades. Joey and Jack are working a shift at the Ice House, trying to pass the time on a very slow night. Joey grumbles about how much she haaaaates waitressing and dealing with all the dumbfuck customers that constantly irritate the shit out of her, and Jack says he can't help remarking on how angry she always seems every minute of the day. Joey looks startled by the criticism, then quietly mulls over her chronic anger issues as Jack wanders off into the back room. Jen and Vincent are sitting on her porch, enjoying some freshly brewed coffee. Vincent says it's nice being off the boat for awhile, and adds that he's only working as a seaman 'cause he's trying to save up for law school. Jen perks up at his future earning potential as a lawyer, and the two stare at each other all smitten-like while the camera pans back over to Casa Leery. Shaggy D.A. bitchily asks Mitch if he's really planning on buying a condemned building to use as a restaurant and, if so, how in blazes he plans on paying for it...so he informs her that he got a bank loan [presumably by using the house as collateral, given his unemployment and lack of money or other assets]. Shaggy D.A. snappishly says she's glad he's getting a loan 'cause she doesn't want to support his fruitless dreams anymore...and a pained looking Dawson retreats to his bedroom to escape the arguing. While that's happening, Tamara and Gary (Shaggy D.A.'s dinner guest) are visibly uncomfortable at having found themselves in the middle of this domestic spat and look as if they'd love to make a break for it. Pacey arrives at Andie's house to pick her up and is greeted by her seemingly pleasant mother. She urges him in, natters about how much Andie talks about him, and invites him to stay for dinner. She then yells up the stairs for Tim, her eldest son, to come down for dinner and meet his sister's new beau. When the power goes out at the Ice House, Joey and Jack join forces to move the lobsters from their holding tank into an ice filled container so they won't immediately perish. As that's happening, Andie arrives looking for Pacey...then realizes with horror that he must have misunderstood that he was supposed to meet her downtown instead of at her house. She's all, "Ack!" and rushes off. Vincent and Jen have moved on from exchanging flirty banter to playing 'what was your most embarrassing sexual encounter?' Vincent shares that he unwittingly picked up a transgender woman with whom he became friends after they stayed up all night drinking together, while Jen tells him about the time her parents caught her in their bed while she was getting busy with her ex-boyfriend. Ew. Vincent vacantly mutters, "Whoa, that's a bummer" and leans in for a smooch. Dawson find Abby in his bedroom, spying on Jen with binoculars. An irked Dawson's all, "What the hell are you doing in my room?", so she pretends to be concerned about Jen being on a date with an older guy. She says she heard all the arguing downstairs and asks him if his parents are getting a divorce, then says she found divorce to be a huge improvement in her home life situation 'cause of the huge guilt-fueled allowance she gets every week. She then gives Dawson a shoulder rub and purrs about how great he smells - OMFG no - and he irritably tells her that whatever ungodly act she's hoping this will lead to is definitely not going to happen. She says she's OK with that, then asks if he wouldn't mind kissing her in front of his window so that Jen can see the two of them and seethe with jealousy (if she happens to be looking out of her window at that exact moment), and he responds by shoving her out of his window...and I'll have to assume that Mitch had a change of heart and put the ladder back so that Abby isn't forced to leap off the roof. Dawson summons both of his parents into the living room and asks them point blank if they have an open marriage...and they just stare back at him with constipated looking expressions on their faces. Vincent is getting increasingly amorous as he mounts Jen atop the kitchen table. Jen's all, "Whoa" and tells him they've taken things far enough, but he refuses to back off and says they're just getting to the good stuff. Jen panics and blurts out that she's sixteen years old...and as Vincent debates whether or not he wants to go down the Tamara pedo route, Grams returns home after bible study and barks at him to get the hell off of her granddaughter and out of her house. Andie races home, finds Pacey in her house, and begs him to leave her with asap. Pacey's all, "Whyyyy?" and tells her that her mom seems to really like him and just invited him to stay for dinner. He then assumes that she wants them to beat a hasty retreat 'cause she's ashamed of subjecting her mom and Tim to a dope like him, and an exasperated Andie blurts out, "Tim died!" and tears up. As Joey and Jack struggle to save the lobsters, the lone customer sitting in the restaurant suggests they unplug, then plug the tank back in...and, luckily, that ends up doing the trick. A few seconds later, Joey and Jack are startled when they realize that the customer has suddenly disappeared, but are thrilled when they find the $100 tip he left, along with a poem written on a napkin about how lovers shouldn't squander their love. Joey and Jack then stare longingly at each other and lock lips before Joey pulls away and continues cleaning up the restaurant. Dawson orders Shaggy D.A. and Mitch to tell him if they have an open marriage...and when Shaggy D.A. snarks that she too would like to know the answer to that question, Mitch explains that he somehow figured an open marriage would heal the brokenness of their relationship after she cheated on him - but now realizes what a boneheaded non-solution that was. Shaggy D.A. wearily says she can't keep apologizing for her extra-martial doinking of Bob the co-anchor, then goes back to entertaining Gary (assuming he hasn't yet had the sense to flee this domestic war zone). Dawson angrily chides Mitch for having too big of an ego to let Shaggy D.A. off the hook, forgive her, and fix this family - but Mitch tearfully says he has no idea how to fix something this broken and begins ugly crying. On the porch, Grams tells Jen she has no idea what to do with her, and makes clear she never wants to witness her being mounted by a guy atop her kitchen table ever again. She incredulously asks, "Have you no respect for yourself?" then storms back into the house, leaving a crying Jen sitting on the front steps. Dawson arrives at the Ice House just as Joey and Jack are closing up. Jack tells Joey he can finish up the rest on his own, and Joey's all, "Phew!" and hastily exits the restaurant with Dawson. Andie tells Pacey that Tim was killed in a car crash while their mom was drunk behind the wheel. Her dad, whose business is now failing, bailed on the family and now just checks in on them once a week ['cause he's a total douche] while she runs the household and lets Jack live in his fantasy world 'cause he's not very adept at coping with the unpleasantness of his current family situation. She adds that her mom is reasonably functional some of the time, then admits that it's hard to have so much responsibility heaped onto her plate. Pacey reacts to this onslaught of sadness by giving her a comforting hug. Dawson and Joey climb up the ladder leading to Dawson's bedroom so they can sit outside together and avoid his warring parents. Joey makes a half-hearted attempt to 'fess up about the kiss between her and Jack - but he cuts her off and says that right now all he wants to do is stare at her face in the light of the full moon and kiss her. Shaggy D.A. is curled up in a chair in the bedroom, staring despondently into space when Mitch enters. The two agree that since their living situation has become completely untenable, he will move out. Elsewhere under the full moon..
Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! Recap: Joey tells Dawson to slow down with his smoochy amorousness 'cause this 'making out outdoors' thing isn't working for her. She complains about the cold air and all the bugs buzzing around, so Dawson reminds her that making out at each other's houses isn't an option anymore, then says that he personally finds the park to be a very romantic setting for their PG action. The next morning, Mitch is downtown with Dawson, waiting to meet up with the property owner of a vacant warehouse (aka a possible location for his new restaurant). The property owner ends up being Tamara, who explains that she's back in Capeside for a few days to sell the property and lock lips with Pacey one last time...and Dawson stares at her with a lock of horrified shock before rushing off to school. At Capeside High, Dawson tries to tell Pacey about the Tamara sighting, but Pacey does that annoying TV tropey thing where he babbles non-stop while completely oblivious to Dawson's urgent desperateness to tell him something really super important, then exclaims that he's late for class before racing off down the hall. TV trope aside ... Dawson, dude, it would have taken you two seconds to just blurt out, "Tamara's back in town." Abby joins Jen in the cafeteria and waves around a ridiculously large wad of cash that is her allowance, then tells Jen she really really wants her to keep her company while she blows it on crap she doesn't need. Jen grumbles that she doesn't feel like shopping and would much rather hide under the covers, and Abby rolls her eyes and says she hopes this depression isn't Dawson-related 'cause there are plenty of other guys in the world who are actually worth mooning over. Jen whimpers that getting rejected hurrrrrts, and that she's not enjoying being on the outskirts of the Joey/Dawson/Pacey clique. Abby dismisses the threesome as boring, then tells Jen to finish nursing her bruised ego and then come out to the mall with her, 'cause being dragged from store to store while someone else shops is super fun. Pacey suggests to Andie that they stroll downtown together...and when he assures her he's not joking about wanting them to spend some quality time together, she happily agrees. Joey has dragged Dawson to a lecture (given by Laura Weston) about abstract expressionism. After the lecture, Laura urges Joey to sign up for her art classes...and once she's out of hearing range Dawson contorts his face in a 'wow, that was one boring lecture!' expression and tells Joey he definitely does not get that kind of messy looking art. Pacey and Andie are strolling downtown when Pacey spots Tamara heading his way. She smiles, says hello, and asks to be introduced to his little friend...and when Pacey just mutely stares at her in stunned bewilderment, she introduces herself to Andie as Pacey's former teacher/squeeze. She then breezily says it was nice to see him before sashaying off, and a perplexed Andie asks Pacey whassup with his reaction to seeing that woman 'cause he looks like he just saw a ghost. Pacey's like, "I gotta go" and chases after Tamara. During art class, Laura marvels at Joey's work and tells her she's very talented, and says if she wants to pursue art as a possible career choice, she can recommend classes that can help develop her talent. When Joey says she learned to draw from her late mother and then just shrugs all self-deprecating-like, Laura urges her to take herself more seriously and that she owes it to herself and the world to not let her natural born artistic brilliance go to waste. Andie drops by Dawson's house under the pretence of asking him about an English assignment...then admits that the real reason she came by was to find out on the down-low if Pacey likes likes her. Dawson says he has no idea 'cause Pacey's never mentioned anything about liking her, then hastily adds it doesn't mean he doesn't. He urges Andie to just come right out and tell Pacey she digs him, but she makes a blech face at that suggestion and says he's too much of an obnoxious pig...and Dawson points out that this pig behavior could be an attempt at flirtation. Andie mulls that over and says she likes the sound of that theory. After Abby blows her allowance, she and Jen go to a marina restaurant for something to eat. Abby remarks on how much happier Jen seems today, and Jen smilingly says she's really digging going back to being the kind of bad seed she was during her slutty New York days. Abby glances over at another table, notices a hottie who looks like he's well into his twenties, and asks his name and if he'd like to join them. He tells her his name is Vincent, but that he has to decline her invitation 'cause he's an out of town fisherman who has to get back to his boat. Abby recites her phone number, and Vincent pretends to make a mental note of it while smittenly telling Jen it was nice meeting her. Uh oh. Joey is sketching in the park when Dawson bounds over and asks her what she's doing. She hastily shuts her sketchbook and says she's not yet ready to share her work with him...and when he says he wants to be supportive of her hobby, she asks him why he refers to filmmaking as his life's passion and art as her hobby. A sheepish Dawson says he knew that that was going to be a boneheaded thing to say as soon as it popped out of his mouth, and a perturbed Joey reacts by packing up her stuff and huffily storms off. Pacey finds Tamara visiting her old beach house and staring out at the water. He ambles over to where she's standing and tells her how awkward it was when they ran into each other downtown. Tamara says it's perfectly normal to feel awkward after the grisly Season 1 pedo-on-boy story arc [that could not end soon enough for me], then describes the current awkward silence between them as "a Pinter moment" 'cause sometimes there's too much emotion for them to adequately express what they're feeling. The two then stand next to each other while silently staring out at the water...and eventually Pacey gets bored by the illicit sex they're not going to have this episode and ambles off. Mitch asks Dawson how things are going with Joey, and Dawson grimly says he can't seem to say or do anything right when it comes to her sudden passion for art. Mitch dickishly chalks it up to the erratic nature of the female brain and suggests that maybe her bitchiness has nothing to do with her art, and urges Dawson to talk it out with her. Pacey drops by to tell Dawson that he just visited with Tamara and realized that he isn't entirely over her...and Dawson strongly urges him to stay as far away from the cougar as possible, 'cause he should be hanging with girls his age - like Andie, for example, who stopped by his house yesterday to find out if he likes her. [So much for agreeing to keep it on the down-low, big mouth.] Pacey points out that Andie is a girl, while Tamara is a woman, and Dawson reemphasizes that he should be with a girl, then begs Pacey to not "go there" with Tamara...'cause fuckin' blech, the disturbing spectacle of those two getting it on in Season 1 is forever tattooed on my brain. Joey asks Bessie if she can take off early from her Ice House shift and head over to the museum to catch the new abstract expressionism exhibit, and Bessie gives her the OK and suggests she also take Jack with her. Mitch tells Tamara he loooooves her warehouse property and could see it working as his new restaurant, and she lays her cards on the table and says that since she's so eager to sell, he's guaranteed to get a good deal. Abby drags Jen with her to the docks so she can look for Vincent. Jen rolls her eyes and points out that he's much too old for her, but Abby reminds her that this show has set a creepy precedent of a developing an entire storyline around a grown adult committing a felony by knowingly hitting the sheets with an underage dimwit. Over at the museum, Jack demonstrates to Joey his deep love, knowledge, and appreciation of abstract expressionism and coos about how emotionally affected he is by the seemingly messy paintings in which he can sense the artist's passion and intelligence. Joey looks startled, then entranced by his strong reaction to the exhibit...and apologizes for assuming that he was little more than a clumsy, inept waiter. Abby and Jen find Vincent working shirtless aboard his boat. Abby sassily invites him out to a popular watering hole this evening, but he passes and comes right out and says he has zero desire "to play blue collar pin-up for some over-sexed, condescending teeny bopper". As Abby stares at him incredulously and is all, "Excuse me?", he sarcastically thanks her for slumming it by coming to the docks to ogle at him while he labors aboard his boat. As Abby stomps off, Jen explains to Vincent that sometimes Abby comes across as a vapid, self-entitled nymphet - but that she mostly means well and that he should give her a break. Vincent says he finds Abby to be a stuck up and phony tart, and that he's way more into her (Jen) and wouldn't mind taking her out...but only as long as she leaves Abby at home. Ouch. And ew. Back at the museum, Joey tells Jack that lately she's been trying her hand at sketching, and Jack says he'd love to see her work and encourages her to draw what most inspires her. As she mulls that over, Dawson arrives and tells Joey he'd love to pretend to share her interest in abstract expressionism by checking out the exhibit with her - but she tells him she already looked at the paintings with Jack 'cause she knows it's not his (Dawson's) thing. Dawson apologizes for being so flip about her passion and stupidly explains, "I'm just trying to be us" and urges her to argue, debate, and put him in his place the way she always does - but an irked Joey says she's soooo tired of them being exactly the way they've always been, and huffily storms off. Pacey stops by Tamara's warehouse property as she's cleaning up, tells her he read up on Pinter pauses so he could understand what the hell she was talking about earlier, then assures her he's definitely over their May-December grossfest. He declares that he's all grown up now, and that this will be their last goodbye...and Tamara agrees and says, "Goodbye, Pacey" - just as he pulls her to him so that the two can indulge in one last passionate smooch for me to barf at. After the commercial break, a discombobulated Tamara says she has a prospective buyer coming in an hour and needs to continue cleaning up. Pacey assures her he knows it's over between them, then asks her if she misses teaching. She admits she does, then wistfully smiles at him at he turns and saunters out of the warehouse. At Capeside the next day, Abby snarls at Jen for stealing Vincent from her, but Jen argues that she did no such thing, and that Vincent was the one who rejected her. Abby denies being rejected, despite clearly having been rejected, and bitchily retorts, "That's your specialty, not mine." In the park, Joey offers to explain her recent prickly behavior to Dawson by nattering about how both he and art are very very important to her. She says that being his sidekick/confidante/other half since childhood has been fun and all, but that she also needs something that belongs to just her and has nothing to do with him. She then shows him a drawing of what she thinks inspires her most, and he's pleased to see that it's a rendering of his mug. She then nonsensically babbles that she doesn't want to lose him, but at the same time lives in fear of going nowhere in life. She insists that all of the fighting and huffily storming off she's been doing this episode has been her fighting with herself...and by fighting with herself she says that a part of her wanted to send him off running, while the other part wanted to clutch him tightly. Dawson looks alarmed and asks which part of her won out, and she doesn't answer and says that for now her contrived sounding inner torment remains unresolved. The two sadly hug as a worried looking Dawson wonders what in blazes is happening to their budding romance, which seems to be turning into more of a mindfuck by the day. Pacey finds Andie in a downtown café and seats himself at her table looking more smug than usual...and Andie asks him if Dawson spilled the beans about her digging him - but he pretends to have no earthly idea what she's talking about. She rolls her eyes and tells him not to get too smug about her feelings for him 'cause they may very quickly pass. A few seconds later, Pacey glances out the window and notices Tamara getting into her car and (mercifully) leaving Capeside for good. He tells Andie he used to know the pedo/cougar/statutory rapist, but doesn't anymore...and then the camera pans out as he shifts his attention back to his age appropriate girlfriend, looking newly fascinated by whatever they're chatting about. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
Recap: Mitch removes the ladder propped up against the house that leads to Dawson's bedroom window and tells his son he's simply taking standard precautions to prevent anymore late night sneaking around involving him and Joey. Dawson accuses his dad of being in denial that he's (not quite) a grown up sexual being...and when Mitch contorts his face with a look of icked alarm, Dawson hastily insists that he's not - in any way, shape or form - having sex with Joey. Mitch decrees that, in addition to removing ladder access to his bedroom window, he's no longer allowing Dawson and Joey to hang out unsupervised in his bedroom anymore 'cause he can't bear the possibility of the two getting it on under his roof. When Dawson objects and urges his dad to just let nature take its course, Mitch firmly replies, "Parent me, child you." A few seconds after Mitch leaves the room, a grinning Joey emerges from Dawson's closet, and the two start smooching -just as Mitch bursts in and catches them in the act, grounds Dawson, and escorts a chuckling Joey outa the house. The next morning, Bessie tells Joey she needs her to stop by the Ice House on her way to school to make sure that the place isn't a total disaster, then explains that the Health Department has threatened to drop by sometime this week...and she's more than a little freaked out 'cause she can't afford a health code violation fine. Joey argues that she's not going to have time to clean the place before school starts - but then reluctantly gives in when Bessie begs her to pleeeeeease just shut up and do her this favor. After Dawson leaves for school, Shaggy D.A. tells Mitch she's less than thrilled by the idea of having an open marriage, but will agree to it if it gives him a sense of satisfaction in feeling like he's getting even with her for cheating on him with Bob. Mitch tells her to drop it 'cause he doesn't want to fight, and Shaggy D.A. coos, "I love you" before heading off to work. Over at Capeside High, Abby is ogling a group of jocks and remarking on how their grossness is at such a base level that it's strangely become a turn-on. Jen shrugs disinterestedly at the thought of hooking up with a smelly jock 'cause of how hung up she is on Dawson, and Abby says that while she doesn't get that at all, she strongly urges Jen to get off her duff and do something to win Dawson back. Andie asks Pacey if she can borrow his notes for the latest economics assignment, then explains that she didn't read the chapter 'cause she forgot her textbook in her locker. Pacey chuckles at her assumption that he would have actually taken notes for any school assignment and advises her to just say 'pass' if Mr. Maddock happens to call on her. A panicked Andie starts nattering about how she doesn't say 'pass', and then becomes irrationally worried about getting behind in school and ending up an unemployed and homeless adult...and Pacey points out that that's unlikely to happen, given that she's from a very wealthy family. Mr. Maddock calls on Andie to explain the difference between macro and micro economics, and she struggles to make up something plausible sounding before sheepishly murmuring, "Pass" ... so then a bespectacled dorky chubbo named Kenny Reiling puts up his hand and gives the correct answer. Mr. Maddock announces that the concept of micro economics will be the basis for the next class assignment titled "alternative lifestyles", and explains that everyone will be paired up, given personas that include profession, salary, and family size, and will work as a faux married couple to prepare an annual budget for their fictional household. As the students pick names out of a hat..
At lunch in the cafeteria, Joey complains to Dawson about how lame the economics assignment is, and that she doesn't get the point of pretending to be people they're never going to be with fictional salaries they may or may never have. She then wrings her hands anxiously and says she has no idea what her future holds, so Dawson assures her she'll eventually get a clue and that he thinks the [pretty lightweight sounding] assignment could really be fun. Joey grumbles about him being partnered with Jen, so he assures her she has nothing to worry about - just as Jen enters the cafeteria and stares over at him wistfully. Abby tells Jen that since she and Dawson are going to be working together, she needs to be proactive and "grab him by the dipstick and make me proud!" LOL. Jen glumly complains that it's futile, given how in love he is with Joey - but Abby dismissively points out that he's a horny fifteen year old who has no idea what love is. Kenny Reiling ambles over to initiate a conversation with Abby about getting together sometime to work on the economics assignment, but she rudely orders him to just do it himself and put her name on it and go away now. As he [refrains from telling her where she can shove her lazy bitchitude and] dejectedly shuffles off, Abby eggs Jen on to showcase her naughty side to Dawson during their late night study sessions, and to take full advantage of being assigned to role-play being a married couple who's preparing a household budget - but a reluctant Jen frets about "jumping the gun". That evening at the Ice House, Joey is helping a stressed out Bessie clean her pigsty of a restaurant in advance of the Health Department's inspection. Joey mentions to Bessie that her latest class assignment is to prepare a household budget for a single career woman, so Bessie points out what she thinks is the obvious: that she's a single career woman and would be more than happy to act as a consultant. Joey makes a blech face and bitchily retorts that she'd much rather seek out a more financially successful, non-harried-all-the-damn-time, non-restauranteur type career woman to give her some insight into household budget planning. Andie and Pacey are in a downtown café, working on their fictional household budget. As Andie expresses concern about being 30K over-budget (!), Pacey's like, "Whatever" and says that instead of helping her put together a reasonable budget for the sake of completing this assignment, he's digging in about the purchase of a fictional Dodge Viper over liveable housing for his pretend family. Andie mutters that she wants a divorce, and Pacey chirps, "Granted!" and tells her she can have half the money and the kids so long as he retains full custody of the Viper. Andie agrees to compromise and let him have the pretend car if they can find a viable two bedroom apartment that wouldn't prompt an intervention from Children's Services...then suggests they take Mr. Maddock's advice to do "research in the field" and go apartment scouting [instead of just looking up the going rate of two bedroom apartments in the local classifieds and calling it a day]. Mitch is working in his backyard when he sees that Shaggy D.A. has been given a lift home by an attractive male co-worker. After the two hug goodbye, Shaggy D.A. wanders over to where Mitch is working and complains about her terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. She explains that she missed a deadline at work...and when her car wouldn't start, she asked Frank (from Accounting) to give her a ride home. A miffed looking Mitch asks her why she didn't call him, and she shrugs and says it was just easier to get a ride. Mitch then starts railing about the lack of trust and honesty in their marriage and nonsensically says he thinks they should take away the rules in order to take away the need to trust her, thereby regaining what they lost after she doinked Bob...and by take away the rules, he means agreeing to an open marriage. He suggest they declare Thursday nights date night, and that on that one night of the week they're both free to do whatever they want with whomever they want as long as they're honest about it. Shaggy D.A. stares back at him looking crestfallen and less than thrilled by the prospect of introducing date night into their deteriorating marriage. Dawson is over at Jen's house, budgeting pretend college tuition for their non-existent children. They form a consensus on the need to set money aside so they can fictionally vacation someplace warm...and Jen "jokes" that they should leave the kids at home 'cause then the trip would be more romantic. She tells Dawson she's soooo happy they can still hang out together, then rests her head on his shoulder and remarks on how nothing has really changed between them since they were a couple. Dawson reacts by looking visibly weirded out and decides that they've probably done enough work for one day. As he gets up and makes a beeline for the door, Jen tells him that if he becomes inspired or just wants to talk, her door is always open...then saucily adds, "If you know what I mean", and Dawson's like, "I'm pretty sure I do" before making a run for it. Andie and Pacey are scouting their twelfth run-down apartment in search of a fictionally liveable two bedroom apartment, which seems like ridiculous overkill for a school budgeting assignment. Pacey grumbles that because she's dragged him all over town to look at apartments, they haven't focused on doing the other 95% of the assignment...and Andie argues that she's taking this assignment very seriously [though not really], and then the two start bickering like an actual married couple. Andie berates him for being a lazy slacker, so Pacey explains that since he's been permanently designated the family/village/county idiot, he rarely feels motivated to try very hard at anything, especially when it comes to schoolwork. He then chides Andie for being a rich, spoiled brat for whom a budgeting assignment is a fascinating novelty, and an incensed Andie screeches that he doesn't know shit about her and huffily storms off. Joey meets with a successful career woman Laura Weston, who teaches art and runs her own interior design firm. Laura tells Joey she was a housewife until she went back to school, and then worked her tail off to develop the kind of career she always dreamed of. She tells Joey her firm has been hired to design a chain of Mexican restaurants and asks her to look at the blueprint in case she'd like to offer any feedback, so Joey looks it over and politely remarks on how impractical it is to place the bar so far away from the kitchen 'cause apparently it's a giant pain in the ass for the waiters to have to go to two different places to put in food and drink orders...then explains that she knows a lot about this kind of thing 'cause she works in her family's restaurant. Laura looks intrigued by this insight and asks Joey if she could pick her brain about feasible restaurant layouts in exchange for help with her economics assignment, and Joey's like, "Deal!" Over at the downtown café, Abby chides Jen for not making a serious move on Dawson, and Jen glumly says she can't possibly compete with how in love he is with Joey. Abby dismissively says that Joey has nothing on her, then turns her attention to Kenny Reiling, who's sitting at the next table, and asks him what he thinks of Joey. Kenny lights up and chirps, "She's hot!", prompting Abby to bark at him to shut up...and Kenny uses the opportunity to remind her that they really do need to work on their economics assignment. Abby responds by dramatically cringing, then admonishes him for bugging her, and tells him to get lost and just finish the thing himself. When he points out that she hasn't done her share of the work, she bitchily replies that, unlike him, she has a very demanding social life. As the hapless lad ambles off, Abby concedes to Jen that, yeah, Joey is pretty and all - but is no match for a sex kitten like her. Jen chucklingly asks if she's suggesting she take off her clothes and throw herself at Dawson, and Abby's like, "Well d'yuh. It could work!", reminds her that tonight is her last opportunity to lure Dawson into the sack, and that she should go for broke by borrowing one of her extra slutty dresses. Jen mulls that over, then grins as she says, "May as well put the final nail in my coffin of shame...what have I got to lose?" [Other than a semblance of self respect, not much I guess.] Shaggy D.A. prepares a candle-lit dinner for herself and Mitch, who brusquely informs her that he's not having dinner at home 'cause it's Thursday, aka date night. She's like, "Oh yeah..", then sadly wishes him a fun evening and blows out the candles before staring despondently into space. While reclining on the Leery porch, Joey tells Dawson she's been learning a lot from Laura Weston, who has helped her realize that she too could one day run her own business. Shaggy D.A. emerges from the house and curtly tells Dawson that if his dad asks, she's gone out for the evening. Dawson explains to a perplexed Joey that his parents are currently going through a weird phase, and Joey suddenly perks up and points out that they're alone in his house and should take advantage of the moment - just as Jen arrives decked out in a super slinky dress to work on the economics assignment with Dawson. When she half-heartedly offers to come back later, Joey irritably says she was just leaving, gives Dawson a goodbye kiss, and bitchily compliments Jen's skankwear. Unshamed, Jen suggests to Dawson that they get busy (on the assignment) in his bedroom. Mmm hmm.. Joey heads over to the Ice House and tells Bessie that Laura gave her a lot of good design and marketing ideas that could improve the restaurant - but Bessie snarls back that she's too busy trying to get this dump up to code before the Health Department inspection, and admonishes Joey for hanging out with Dawson instead of helping her mop and scrub. Joey irritably retorts that she's sick of being her restaurant slave and having to work all the time instead of being able to live her life, so Bessie snaps at her to go home 'cause she and Jack have it covered...and a bewildered Jack's all, "Uh, we do?" LOL. Later, Pacey stops in at the Ice House to chat with Jack about Andie's squirrelly behavior and to ask in all seriousness if she's on any kind of medication. He further explains that during the course of arguing about their economics assignment, he called her a rich princess 'cause he assumes their family is loaded - but noticed that that remark caused her to go somewhat ballistic. Jack tells Pacey that his family is no longer rich and that the days of the McPhees being a wealthy clan are long over, then urges him to give Andie a break. Shaggy D.A. goes to a coffee house and glumly sips coffee, while Mitch is at Duke's bar, guzzling a beer and checking out the single ladies. After wrapping up the economics assignment, Jen hovers over Dawson in her cleavage bearing slip dress and carries on about how she's sooooo exhausted that she feels like sexily lounging atop his bed and hopes he doesn't mind if she "crashes" here for the night. Dawson says he does mind, actually, and that she should probably go home now...and an incredulous looking Jen pretends that she simply wants to go straight to sleep, then asks him if Joey has been poisoning his mind against her. Dawson responds by calling her out on her not-so-subtle suggestive comments and the way she just threw herself at him, then asks her if she isn't suitably humiliated by his obvious lack of interest in her. Jen's like, "Nope" and says she has zero respect for his decision to be with Joey, and that she wants him to know he has options, sleeping with her right now being one of them. A befuddled Dawson exclaims, "Who are you? What happened to Jen?" so Jen explains that she's livening things up, then gives him a smooch and lumbers toward the door as she seductively purrs, "I hope you can handle it." Following that, she exits his room, then pauses in the hallway to stare into space looking mortified, miffed, and mournful all at the same time. While getting ready for bed, Mitch tells Shaggy D.A. he had fun ogling women at Duke's, and she shares that she went out for drinks with a friend. The two then climb into bed together, and Shaggy D.A. turns onto her side and goes to sleep, while a restless looking Mitch lays on his back and stares at the ceiling. Bessie returns home after cleaning the restaurant all night and finds Joey waiting for her on the porch. She tells Joey she's firing her from her waitressing job, and a startled Joey says she feels really really bad about her outburst and didn't mean the words that tumbled out of her mouth. Bessie argues that she did mean them, and that it was a very reasonable outburst, given that running the restaurant really shouldn't be her problem...and that it's not fair for a teenager to be burdened by the mess that is her family's failing business. Joey argues that since she's her sister the mess is her problem, and that she wants to help out so she doesn't feel like she's alone in it. A contrite Bessie promises that one day she'll be proud of her - but Joey says she already is, and compliments her for being so amaaaaaazing as she seemingly deals with so much stress every minute of every day. Mr. Maddock collects the "alternative lifestyles" assignments from the class, and points out that the work they did here could very well be applied to their lives in the future. Kenny rats out Abby for not doing her share of the project and complains that she threatened his life and verbally abused him, and Mr. Maddock weirdly ignores the bullying complaints and Abby's repeated refusals to help with the assignment she was given and just chuckles about how he hopes their fictional budget includes a line item for marriage counselling. Andie says she decided that since marriage is a 50/50 partnership she figured it made sense to prepare the budget from the wife's perspective and weakly hands in her half of the work. A few seconds later, Pacey arrives and hands in the fully prepared budget on behalf of both of them...and Mr. Maddock looks impressed and says that the report appears to be quite comprehensive. After class, Dawson tells Joey he's soooo happy that the assignment is over, while Joey says she actually loved doing it 'cause it gave her a sense of optimism about her future as a career woman. As the two smooch, a glum looking Abby and Jen wander past, and Abby snarls, "Get a room." Andie thanks Pacey for finishing the entire project on his own, and Pacey apologizes for calling her rich and spoiled...then explains that he chatted with Jack, who gave him the skinny on her family's descent into poverty. He then tells her that, in their fictional household budget, he decided to include the cost of a Viper, which meant he had to squeeze their pretend family into a run-down one bedroom apartment...and as the two bicker about that impractical decision, the camera pans over to Tamara - ack!!! - who's sitting in her convertible and smirkingly watching them argue. Welcome back, pedo. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"! |
Dawson's Creek HomepageRecapper: Isabel K. French
Your contributions help keep the site ad-free
|
|