Recap: JR has hired a team of uniformed security guards to patrol Southfork as a means of protecting him from some otherwise bored vigilantes who might seek revenge against him for allegedly financing a bloodless Southeast Asian coup. Miss Ellie telephones from "Paris" to tell JR she's been reading about his latest scandal in the papers and asks him if there's any truth to it, so he tells her it's all lies and that he had nothing to do with any counter-revolution. He complains that Bobby refuses to lift a finger to help him through this crisis, then assures her she needn't worry about this 'cause soon he'll be headed to Austin to look into getting the whole thing dropped. In a Dallas hotel room, Dusty and Clayton Farlow tell Sue Ellen they're willing to storm over to Southfork with her right now so she can confront JR and announce that she's finally leaving him. Sue Ellen says that while she definitely likes that idea, she's concerned about removing her son from the ranch without JR going completely ape-shit...and Clayton points out that when it comes to the custody of small children, courts tend to rule in favor of the mother. Sue Ellen wrings her hands worriedly and says she doesn't think that right now is the right time to get her son, but rather after JR jets off to Austin, where she can only assume he'll attempt to bribe one or more senators to side with him in the current Southeast Asian Counter-Revolution fiasco. She tells Dusty and Clayton she feels bad involving them in her impending divorce/baby daddy drama, but Clayton says that JR's bullying and threatens have zero effect on the Farlow clan, since they're just as rich and well-connected as the Ewings. He asks Sue Ellen if she thinks JR was, in fact, behind the counter-revolution...and when she replies, "I'd stake my life on it", he says that if JR is found guilty, it's very possible he could go to prison and/or lose his company, which means that no court would ever award him full custody of Baby John. Sue Ellen grins happily at that possibility and says she's going to focus all of her energy on extracting her son from Southfork. JR is in Austin, meeting with Senator Harbin (aka chairman of the Select Committee of Legislative Inquiry) to request a look-see at the evidence that Cliff presented to the panel. Harbin's like, "Nope, no can do", then explains that members of the Department of Justice will be attendance at the hearing...and if things go south for him (JR), they may decide to hold him pending the federal trial, and be more likely to discover that a senator on the take supplied him with classified documents. A miffed JR says, in that case, he'll head back to Dallas now...and a few seconds after he exits the office, he's served with a subpoena to appear before the senate committee. He rushes over to the nearest pay phone and calls Louella to instruct her to tell Claude Brown to flee the U.S. pronto - just as she too is served with a subpoena. Over at The Store, Pam's assistant (Jackie) tells her that Bobby called earlier, and that he sounded very tired. She offers to cover for Pam if she wants to fly to Austin to support her husband, but Pam worries that her presence at the hearing would only complicate matters. Ewing Oil's secretary #2 (Phyllis) blabs to Sue Ellen that Louella was just served with a subpoena while she was talking to JR, who was in Austin at the time of the call...and Sue Ellen's all, "Yippee!" and promptly calls Dusty to report that JR is in Austin, where she assumes he'll be until the hearing, and therefore plans to babynap her son this evening. Instead of in broad daylight, when it would be a far less suspicious time to abscond with the tot now that she's under the scrutiny of the army of security guards JR just hired to patrol the ranch. Leslie drops by Jeremy Wendell's office to discuss the damaging headlines plaguing Ewing Oil. She tells Jeremy she has some pretty compelling evidence that proves JR financed the counter-revolution...and when he asks her if she'd be willing to present it to the senate committee, she grins and replies, "For the right price." Jeremy correctly assumes that the right price includes signing Westar Oil as her newest PR client - but says that before he agrees to anything, he'll first need to see the evidence. Leslie invites him to her apartment this evening to get a first-hand look at the proof, and Jeremy says he can't wait to see Ewing Oil stripped of its state charter and no longer able to function as Westar's primary competition in the Texas oil world. That evening, Sue Ellen dresses Baby John in a sweater and pants and tells him to say a final bye bye to his hideously decorated nursery. She promises to buy him new clothes and toys once they get to their new home...and as she carries him downstairs, JR expectedly arrives home, glares at her suspiciously, and asks her where she's going. She comes right out and announces that she's leaving him and taking their son with her, to which JR snarls, "The hell you are!" and grabs Baby John from her and orders one of his security guards to escort her off the property. Sue Ellen yells that if the senate committee finds him guilty of financing a counter-revolution he'll be hauled off to prison, then motions at her son, who's mutely clinging to JR while seemingly oblivious to the fact that he's the unfortunate subject of his idiot parents' ugly screaming match, and cries, "I'm going to have him!!" JR barks, "I'll kill you first!", and Sue Ellen says he'll have to, then screeches, "Because I'm going to get him!!" As the security guard drags her out of the house, Pam appears at the top of the staircase and orders JR to give Baby John back to his mother. JR snappishly tells her to mind her own business, then likens Sue Ellen to Rebecca Barnes as "another drunken slut who ran away". Pam shoots him a hateful glare as she growls, "You slime...you make me sick", and JR warns that he'll destroy anyone who tries to take his son away. Kristin drops by Ewing Oil to meet with JR, who reminds her that they had a deal which entailed her staying far away from Dallas. Kristin says she's grown tired of his "little monthly checks" 'cause she's developed from pretty expensive habits in California and thinks he should start paying for them. She says she's been reading the papers and figured that now would be the perfect time to threaten him with a paternity lawsuit, and JR pretends to be agreeable to being blackmailed and explains that with his pending troubles he's unable to pull too much cash out of his bank account. She seems satisfied enough with that answer, but warns, "Don't wait too long", and says she'll call him in the next few days. Over at the Cattlemen's Club, Punk Anderson tells Ray he went ahead and signed a development contract to get the Lubbock housing project started, and adds that he and his fellow investors kept a close eye on him during much of the negotiation process. Ray admits to feeling a bit in over his head...so Punk is like, "Speaking of being in over your head" and pressures Ray to join the other investors by throwing in $3 million. Ray looks startled and says that while Donna is loaded, he doesn't have that kind of money...and an unsympathetic Punk is all, "You seriously can't put a measly $3 million together?" and further manipulates Ray by remarking how happy Jock will be when he learns that his best friends and illegitimate spawn are all invested in a housing deal together. Defense lawyer Emmett Walsh tells JR that before he's willing to take his case, he needs to find out what evidence Cliff presented to the senate committee. Ray calls Dave Culver in D.C. in an effort to get a hold of Donna, but Dave says she's at a social event somewhere outside of D.C. and will likely be unreachable until tomorrow. Ray scrunches his face in frustration for a few seconds, then decides 'ah fuck it' and calls his banker (Mr. Morgan) and asks him to draw up a $3 million check from his/Donna's joint account and make it out to Unified Development. Donna returns to D.C. earlier than expected and drops by Dave Culver's office. He tells her that Ray called earlier...and a few seconds later, Mr. Morgan calls to ask Donna if she's OK with her husband withdrawing $3 million from their joint account. Donna stares concernedly into space before telling Mr. Morgan to go ahead and issue the check, then tells Dave she needs to get back to Dallas before Ray completely wipes out their bank account just so he can meet with Punk's approval. Afton is at Cliff's apartment, hovering over him as he mutters about how tired he is...before completely passing out. Afton rinses the drugged cup of coffee she had poured him earlier, then sashays over to the door to let in JR and Detective Harry McSween so they can search the apartment for whatever documents Cliff gave to the senate committee. JR quickly locates the briefcase, and Harry gets busy taking photos of each document. The special hearing of the Select Committee of Legislative Inquiry gets underway with testimony from Marilee Stone and Jordan Lee, who share their strong suspicions (but with no hard evidence) that JR was directly involved with the financing of the Southeast Asian counter-revolution. Following that, the committee calls Claude Brown to the stand, and his immunity-protected testimony proves more damaging. He tells the panel that JR gave him $10 million worth of Swiss francs to finance the counter-revolution, says he has copies of the bank deposit to prove it, and that the money was withdrawn to pay the coup-ers just prior to the government changing hands. Following that, Leslie Stewart is called into the room and testifies that she had taped conversations with JR, who openly admitted to financing the coup...and Cliff presses the play button on a large tape recorder so that the senators can hear the incriminating audio evidence. JR insists on defending himself with his own testimony, and denies being in any way responsible for funding the Southeast Asian counter-revolution. He admits to giving Claude Brown $10 million - but insists that it was for purely philanthropic reasons, and to dispel the myth of "the ugly American" in an effort to appease a yet-non-existent new government that (fingers crossed!) might one day take over the unnamed fictional Southeast Asian country that had nationalized his oil wells. As for Leslie's tape recording, since he knew she had a hankering for ruthless men, he was merely pretending to have financed a Southeast Asian coup in an effort to get her horned up enough to hit the sheets with him. LOL. One of the more bewildered looking senators is all, "You seriously expect us to believe a word of this?", so JR asks the committee to summon the unnamed fictional Southeast Asian country's ambassador to the UN: Ambassador Thone, whose testimony will corroborate this implausible nonsense. Ambassador Thone displays for the senate panel a rendering of a hospital wing that's currently under construction in the unnamed fictional Southeast Asian country, along with that of two new schools in the works - all of which are to be named in honor of JR Ewing. Thone says that Emmett Walsh can provide all of the records for the expenditures for this construction, which conveniently add up to $10 million, minus the deposit fee that Claude Brown was given. Cliff stares at Thone incredulously and asks him where the money went just before the coup happened, so Thone explains that since no one wanted that kind of cash to fall into the wrong hands, it was transferred to Switzerland for safe-keeping, then returned to Southeast Asia once the unnamed fictional country had its new, capitalist-friendly government in place. Ambassador Thone adds that JR has generously offered to donate 10% of all oil profits from his Southeast Asian wells to his government and calls it a humbling humanitarian gesture...and JR kind of contorts his face into a 'the fuck?' expression, which made me wonder if Thone was craftily hosing JR in real time. As JR mutters, "It's the least I could do", Senator Harbin recommends to the senate committee that, in light of JR's admirable acts of generosity, they should all vote no prosecution. The vote quickly passes - with Bobby in agreement - and a furious Cliff accuses JR of bribing Ambassador Thone to appear at his hearing and testify about non-existent philanthropic construction projects. Cliff asks Bobby why in blazes he sided with JR, then points out how obvious it is that JR knew exactly what kind of evidence the panel had against him. Bobby denies any wrongdoing or even voting against his conscience, but Cliff just snorts, "You're a Ewing" and threatens to appear before the Senate Ethics Committee to lodge a complaint. Bobby urges him to stop, take a breath, and come by Southfork later so that they can discuss the matter in more detail...and Cliff agrees, but says it likely won't change his mind. The next morning, JR arrives at Ewing Oil and summarily fires Louella for not ensuring that Claude Brown left the country before he could be called to testify at the hearing...and a stunned Louella's all, "The fuck? You're firing me for that?" Kristin drops by Ewing Oil in a more determined effort to extort money from JR...and when he tells her she's not getting another penny from him, she threatens to blab to the press that he's her baby daddy. JR counter-threatens to bring charges against her for shooting him last season, and she pales and replies, "You wouldn't do that." JR snaps back, "Wouldn't I?" and threatens to unleash his violent goons on her if she doesn't get the hell out of Dallas immediately. Kristin glares at him, snarks, "It's not over yet!", and flouncily storms out of his office. Sue Ellen stops in at Pam's office to tell her she's divorcing JR so that she can marry the man of her dreams, who she once thought was lost forever. Pam's like, "That's nice, but what about your baby?" and Sue Ellen says she's not leaving town without the tot, and could really use her help. JR goes over to Leslie's apartment to applaud her for her self-survival skills, which he too would have employed if he were in her shoes. The two stare intensely at each other...and JR says he still wants to hit the sheets with her more than ever - but only for the fun of it, with no strings attached. Leslie says she's definitely down with that, and the two start smooching. Kristin is back in her hotel room, complaining to whoever she's talking to on the phone that her attempt to blackmail JR didn't work, and that he even threatened her if she didn't leave town. She vows that he'll soon regret what he said to her. Post-coitus, JR sits on Leslie's bedside and tells her that no way was that sub-par doink worth the wait - bwahahaha! - and she looks unfazed by the insult and chuckles about how most things usually aren't. She tells him that despite everything "you're still my kinda man", and JR gives her a weirded out look as he beats a hasty retreat from her bedroom...and once he's out of earshot, Leslie picks up the phone and calls Jeremy Wendell to talk about their future partnership. JR enters the Southfork nursery and is startled to find it empty. He rushes downstairs and asks the nearest security guard where his son is, so the guard tells him that Mrs. Ewing took him out for a drive...and by Mrs. Ewing, he means Pam. A panicked JR gets on the phone with Detective Harry McSween, gives him Pam's license plate number, and says she just kidnapped his son...but that the detective is to call the ranch when she's found so that he can personally take care of the matter on the down-low. Cliff arrives at Southfork for his tête-à-tête with Bobby...and as he ambles towards the house, he glances over at the pool and - ack! - notices a female body floating, face-down. He races over to the pool and leaps in in an effort to save the unidentified woman [spoiler: it's Kristin] ... and as he cradles her lifeless body, he notices JR staring down at them from his bedroom balcony. Cliff bellows at his archenemy, "She's dead! You bastard!" Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
5 Comments
Robin
10/16/2021 04:19:46 pm
Hi, where can I download season 4? I already have seasons 1-3. I love reading them, especially in the train.
Reply
Robin
10/16/2021 04:22:29 pm
Sorry, found it! I only saw 3 downloads, but season 1 and 2 are bundled.
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Isabel K. French
10/16/2021 05:01:18 pm
Glad you found Season 4 ok. Enjoy the reading on the train!
Dianna
2/3/2022 01:09:56 pm
These are great! Is Season 5 coming soon?
Reply
Isabel K. French
2/3/2022 01:14:24 pm
Oh yes, I will resume these Dallas recaps later this year.
Reply
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