Dallas - Season 2, Episode 19
Recap: The Ewings are gathered in the Southfork study/library for some after-dinner familial bonding. JR and Kristin (Sue Ellen's sister, who was invited by JR to stay at the ranch) are playing a spirited game of backgammon. When they finish the game, JR nudges Kristin in Bobby's direction and suggests that they play together next...and Sue Ellen shoots JR a suspicious stink-eye at his less-than-subtle attempt to stir up some adulterous hanky-panky action between his doltish brother and her vapid sister.
Later, JR tells Sue Ellen he's happy to have Kristin around 'cause it livens things up at Southfork. Sue Ellen admonishes him for egging Kristin on to seduce Bobby - but JR just chuckles and says it's not his fault if "nature takes its course" and the two end up hitting the sheets.
The next morning, Sue Ellen and Kristin are lounging by the pool. When Kristin gushes about how much she loooooves hanging at this fancy ranch, Sue Ellen lectures her about how money isn't the most important thing in life - a lesson she learned when she sold her soul by marrying a rich oil man who now can't stand the sight of her...not least 'cause she cuckolded him by doinking Cliff Barnes a few weeks before announcing she was preggers. Kristin shrugs and admits to being a shameless gold digger, and that her goal in life is to marry into wealth and live a life of pampered leisure. She then grumbles about their childhood and the way she was always being unfavorably compared to her big sister, and haughtily says she's no longer willing to play second fiddle to her. As Sue Ellen chews on that hostile nugget, Lucy pokes her head outside and tells her she has a call from her doctor - but when Sue Ellen picks up the phone, she learns it's really Cliff calling for some top secret intel. He asks her how important the Kessel oil lease is to JR, so she tells him she's heard Jock grunt about its importance from time to time...which, by default, means it's also important to JR. During that conversation, Lucy heads over to the pool and eyes Kristin suspiciously as she wonders aloud what in blazes JR was thinking when he invited her to stay at the ranch indefinitely. Kristin chirps, "He was just being nice" and Lucy rolls her eyes, guffaws, and retorts, "JR is never nice."
Downtown, Bobby meets up with Pam, who got herself a layered haircut with cute feathered bangs. He urges her once again to pleeeeeeease come home, and Pam makes a blech face and says she can't stand the idea of living on an oppressive ranch inhabited by two male Ewings who insist on perpetuating the tedious Ewing-Barnes feud. Bobby chides her for not wanting to live under the same roof as his family - 'cause, yeah, what newlywed wife wouldn't want to live in such close proximity to her shitty in-laws - and Pam gets teary and whimpers, "I don't know what to doooooo." Bobby stares at her with his default blank expression for several seconds, then gives her a kiss and invites her to lunch.
Cliff heads over to the Kessel ranch and begs the owner, Wally Kessel, to deny (or at least delay) leasing his land to the Ewings. Wally says he's desperate for the cash, so Cliff tells him that Digger will cut him a check in exchange for future royalties of whatever oil gets extracted. Wally mulls that over, then says if Digger (meaning Cliff) can come up with the cash, then yep, they have a deal.
That evening, Jock asks JR if he secured the Kessel lease yet, and JR tells him the deal is imminent 'cause he knows how broke Kessel is and that his next mortgage payment is due soon. Jock grumbles that if they don't start to drill soon, it's going to cost them money...since apparently Kessel is the last holdout on a vast plot of prime oil drilling land. JR complains that Wally is asking for more money in royalties and suspects that Cliff Barnes is somehow behind it. Bobby admonishes him for automatically assuming that Cliff is to blame...and when JR bitchily snaps that the less they have to do with the Barnes family the better, Bobby smugly retorts, "I'm married to a Barnes and plan to stay that way."
Cliff asks Pam if she could please shell out $10,000 for an oil revenues investment for Digger...then reminds her that, last he checked, the hopeless wino was drunkenly staggering around in or near the vicinity of California. Pam agrees to check with Bobby and ask him if it's OK for her to withdraw that kind of money from their joint bank account for an investment, and Cliff assures her that once the oil drilling starts, she'll get her money back.
Bobby tells Pam she's more than welcome to lend his cash to drunken Digger, then wrings his hands again about how bummed he is about their ongoing separation. You could easily solve that problem by not trying to force your wife to live at stupid Southfork with your family - and instead buy a nice cozy house for the two of you and visit Southfork on weekends or major holidays. Dolt.
That evening, Kristin dons a pretty white dress and wanders around Ewing manor, looking hilariously awestruck by the tacky '70s wallpaper and outmoded drapery. Lucy silently watches her from across the room, then cattily remarks that she looks exactly like Sue Ellen did the first time she stepped foot inside the Southfork "mansion". Kristin grins and decides to take that as a compliment.
The next morning, Kristin leaps into the pool while Bobby is swimming laps...and the two flirtily splash around together. When JR and Sue Ellen happen to wander by at that moment, JR remarks that it's nice to hear the sound of Bobby's laughter again. Sue Ellen rolls her eyes and warns him to not use her idiot sister as a pawn in his nefarious schemes - and JR says she's imagining things, then dickishly adds, "I hope you haven't been drinking again." After Sue Ellen ambles off, JR sidles up to Kristin and suggests she hitch a ride with Bobby into Dallas and then bum around downtown for the day...and she perks up at that prospect. Miss Ellie and Jock emerge from the house a few seconds later, and Kristin wraps herself up in a towel and gushes about how much she loooooves Southfork and never wants to leave!
Sue Ellen tells Kristin she can't hang with her today 'cause she'll be attending a charity meeting with Miss Ellie, and Kristin manages to keep a straight face and assures her it's not a problem. Sue Ellen comes right out and asks her if she's interested in Bobby, then warns her that the blockhead is off the market 'cause he's still in love with Pam. Kristin snorts derisively and accuses Sue Ellen of worrying too much about being overshadowed by her.
Kristin catches Bobby as he's just about to leave and asks him if he wouldn't mind giving her a lift downtown. He's like, "Sure, get in" ... and Sue Ellen stares at them through her bedroom window, her face scrunched concernedly.
During the drive, Kristin pretends to have an interest in museums and architecture, then pretends she's not the sort of girl who would jump into a marriage with just anyone. When they arrive downtown, Bobby drops her off and tells her to stop by the Ewing Oil office building by 5pm to get a ride back to Southfork.
Cliff gives Wally Kessel a cashier's check for $10,000, then gleefully tells him he got the money from Pam specifically so he could screw the Ewings with their own money. Wally just kind of shrugs indifferently at Cliff's revenge-induced bitchitude and says he's just happy to have the cash.
JR gets a call from one of his banker flunkies, who reports that Pam just withdrew money from hers and Bobby's account in order to invest in the Kessel lease on behalf of Digger. JR mutters obscenities under his breath as he charges over to Bobby's office, angrily breaks the news about Pam's involvement in this giant yawn of a subplot, and says that Kessel is now demanding 25% in royalties (up from his usual 15%). Bobby points out that 15% is pretty low and insists that Pam couldn't possibly have known that the money she loaned to Digger had anything to do with a business deal involving Ewings...but promises to look into the boring matter, pronto.
Bobby storms over to the Office of Land Management to confront Cliff about the 10K loan - and is miffed when he finds the office empty.
Kristin arrives at the Ewing Oil offices at 5pm to catch a ride back to Southfork with Bobby - but JR tells her he's not around and that he'd be more than happy to give her a lift. He tells her she's had a positive effect on his brother and that he's been a lot more cheerful lately...then solemnly adds, "Bobby's marriage is over, he just hasn't wanted to admit it." Kristin perks up at that premature pronouncement and looks intrigued.
Bobby tells Pam there's a problem with the 10K she loaned to Digger, then explains that it was used to delay the Ewings' attempts to score the Kessel lease. Pam's all, "Wha-a-a?" and says she had no idea the Ewings were involved in the loan, and that she highly doubts Cliff was aware of it either. Bobby loses his patience and says it's highly doubtful that Cliff wouldn't have known all about it, then snarks at her to grow up and realize no one (aka the Ewings she hates so much) is perfect. As he storms off, a tearful Pam stares after him.
Back at Southfork, Bobby tells JR and Jock and he's pretty sure that Cliff was involved with the Kessel debacle - but makes it clear that Pam was completely oblivious to it when she loaned Digger the money. JR says he's plenty steamed about Cliff using Ewing money to sabotage one of their projects, and Jock concurs and grumbles that Pam should have stayed out of the matter. He says he really really wants the Kessel lease and demands to know what JR is going to do to fix this boring-as-fuck predicament - and Bobby steps up and offers to sort it out by trying to reason with Wally and Cliff. Jock snaps, "Do whatever it takes!" and Bobby clicks his heels and obediently replies, "Yes sir!" which made me cringe, 'cause - yeesh - these grown Ewing sons really have odd daddy issues.
Pam calls Bobby to tell him she's been unable to track Cliff down. She invites him to lunch with her tomorrow, but he sourly declines 'cause of how she's always pro-Cliff and anti-Ewing, wah wah..
Bobby finds Cliff in his office and implores him to convince Wally Kessel to settle and lease his land to the Ewings. Cliff pretends to know nothing about the matter, then snarks - appropros of nothing - about how he never wanted Pam to marry him. Bobby sighs and says he thought they were past all this, and Cliff says that while he likes him personally, he's obliged to hate him for no reason other than he's a Ewing...then rails about how the Ewings are responsible for ruining his political career and getting him arrested for Tina Louise's murder. Bobby contorts his normally blank face into a menacing expression and warns Cliff that if he doesn't leave his marriage alone, he'll join forces with JR to fuck up his life a whole lot worse than it's been fucked up already.
After witnessing a seemingly flirty interaction between Kristin and Bobby, Lucy advises Kristin to not waste her time on Bobby 'cause it's unlikely he'll follow through and fool around on his wife, despite their estrangement. She adds that JR, on the other hand, has no compunction about cheating on his wife and is always up for some sleazy bedroom action. Kristin stares quizzically into space and pretends to have no earthly idea what Lucy could possibly be referring to.
Kristin drops by Bobby's room as he's changing his shirt and invites him to play a game of tennis - but he politely declines and tells her he's on his way to a business meeting with Wally Kessel. When she looks visibly disappointed, he relents and says he can play after his meeting, so she perks up and rushes off to gather up her tennis gear and meet him at his car. When Lucy sees the two drive off together in Bobby's convertible, she shakes her head in dismay.
Bobby does his best to convince Wally to accept 21% in royalties for his oil lease, then leaves the old man his card and urges him to think really hard about it. As he and Kristin head back to his car, he remarks that he's very optimistic that Wally will come around, then says he's definitely up for a game of tennis.
At Southfork that evening, JR flirtily asks Kristin if she's made any significant progress on Operation Seduce Bobby...and Bobby happens to walk into the room at that very moment and looks startled at their touchy-feeliness. After an embarrassed Kristin rushes off to telephone her mother, Bobby admonishes JR for doing something as icky as make a move on his wife's sister. JR turns the tables on Bobby by suggesting that it's actually he who thinks Kristin is hot - but then stares contemplatively into space and dreamily refers to the minx as "a very special girl". LOL.
Wally Kessel drops by the Ewing Oil offices to lease his land in exchange for 21% in royalties. Bobby gushes about what a wealthy man he now is - but Wally ignores him and shoots JR the stink-eye and chides him for trying to railroad him with a shitty royalties deal.
Pam storms over to Cliff's office and gives him the what-for for extracting the $10,000 from her under false pretenses. She cries, "I feel like a fool!" - but an obstinate Cliff tells her she's going to have to choose a side: Ewing or Barnes. Pam says that as shitty as the Ewings are, his "side" isn't looking very attractive either.
Bobby calls Pam, who tells him she confronted Cliff about lying to her, and that she's very sorry she gave him the benefit of the doubt. She then says they both need a good night's sleep so they can continue to drag out their marital separation quagmire into as many future episodes as possible.
JR tip-toes into Kristin's bedroom to creepily watch her sleep, then wakes her up by announcing, "Bobby's home."
Bobby is in the study, brooding and drinking whiskey when Kristin enters the room in her white negligee and pretends she came in to look for something to read. She asks him whassup with his glum aura, then presses herself against him and leans in for a smooch. He pushes her away and says he can only offer her friendship, and she's like, "Ah well, it was worth a try." She runs into Lucy on her way back to bed, and Lucy shoots her a smug smile and says, "I told you so" then snarks that there's no room at this ranch for a home-wrecking gold digger. She advises Kristin to go elsewhere in her search for a hapless rich man, 'cause at Southfork she's nothing but a loser.
Sue Ellen tells Kristin she should prolly leave Dallas and join their mother in Santa Fe until such time as her character can be recast with the far spicier Mary Crosby.
Pam and Bobby stroll down the street together. He gives her a smooch and coos, "I love you and I want you" and Pam says she really really wants them to start over - but not at shitty Southfork. Bobby nonsensically pronounces that they (Cliff and JR) will have won if the two of them go off somewhere to live a peaceful non-Southfork life. He then says he can't wait forever for her to make up her mind and urges her to shit or get off the pot. And soon.
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Recapper: Isabel K. French
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