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Melrose Place - Season 2, Episode 4

1/17/2021

1 Comment

 
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Jane dines with her upgrade
"Fire Power"
Original airdate: 9/29/1993

Episode summary: Jake is devastated when his bike shop is destroyed in a fire. Michael is enraged when Jane begins dating his ex-bestie, Sam. Alison continues to screw up at D&D.

Recap: Alison wakes up on the couch after her vodka-fuelled bender the night before. She stares at the empty bottle in mild dismay, then throws it into the garbage can and rinses out her drinking glass. After that she tiptoes over to her bedroom, quietly slips into the bed beside Billy, and pretends as though she's been sleeping there all night when Billy wakes up a few seconds later and gives her a good morning spoon-canoodle. She pulls away and says she has to get ready for her busy day ahead at D&D, and Billy says he's concerned that she's burying herself in her work instead of dealing with the trauma of Keith's stalking and self-inflicted mercy killing. She insists that she's ready to move on and snarls that she doesn't want to talk about Keith anymore - amen to that - and Billy flops onto the bed in exasperation.

Jake excitedly shows Jo a bunch of decrepit motorcycles he just bought at an auction and explains that he plans on fixing them up for resale...and Jo's all, "Wha-a-a?!" and informs him that the money he just withdrew from the business account to buy the bikes was earmarked for the quarterly taxes, for which she just mailed a check to the IRS. She orders Jake to take the bikes back, but he says that the auction house doesn't do returns...and acknowledges the stupid breakdown in communication [on both of their parts] regarding the shop's finances. He promises Jo he'll find a buyer for the bikes, and she seems satisfied enough with that and tells him she's off to a casting session at D&D.

Over at D&D, Amanda glances over the headshots of the male models auditioning for the role of Sage Brush Beer Spokesman and complains to Alison and Jo that none of these schmoes has the rugged hotness of Jake. She hands the phone to Alison and explains that she's on hold with the photo studio...and Alison takes that to mean she's supposed to book a photo session in the much-sought-after studio A with a top lighting technician. When she proudly tells Amanda about the booking, Amanda bitchily reminds her that they haven't even cast the Sage Brush Beer Spokesman yet so they'll have to cancel the booking, then snatches the phone back from Alison and says she'll handle it...the way she probably should have done instead of not clearly communicating exactly what the hell Alison was supposed to do when she handed her the damn phone.  

Over dinner at Shooters, Jo is complaining to Jane about how Jake bought auction motorcycles without consulting her, and Jane's like, "Yeah whatever" and says she's soooo annoyed that Michael's life is so together while hers is such a mess. Jo urges her to enjoy a night out with a hot guy of her choosing, and Jane mulls that over and says she has a hankering for Sam Towler, aka Michael's best friend who gave her a smooch in the Irreconcilable Similarities episode. Jo nods approvingly and says that, yep, she should definitely look into tapping that.

Jane arrives at the construction site that Sam presides over and gets hooted at and cat-called by the horny construction workers as she sashays in her mini-dress over to where Sam is standing. She tells him she was just in the neighborhood and figured she'd drop by to invite him over for dinner tomorrow night...and he says he highly doubts that she was "just in the neighborhood", but is more than happy to accept her saucy invitation.
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"How would you like to hook up with your old pal's soon-to-be ex?"

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"Sounds like a love triangle I could definitely get onboard with."

As Alison and Amanda rush to get to a client meeting, Amanda notices that Alison has the wrong client's file in her hand and irritably tells her that she should sit the meeting out. Alison whines, "Give me a channnnnnce", but Amanda points out that she can't rely on her on account of all the screwing up she's being doing recently. She says that something is clearly affecting her ability to be functional on the job, and is therefore officially cutting back on her responsibilities.

After working the phones, Jake has zero luck finding a buyer for the motorcycles and tells Jo to stop payment on the IRS check. Jo says she can't/won't do that, then laments the possibility of losing her 50K investment. Jake gets irked at that and reminds her that he never wanted her money, and she's like, "Whatever. We have a week and a half to get the money into the bank account before the check bounces."

The next morning, Alison rushes around the apartment getting ready for work and tells Billy she's determined to prove to Amanda that she's able to perform the bare basics of her duties at D&D. A few seconds later, Amanda drops by to tell Alison that she completely re-worked the figures for whatever account she was working on and hands her a floppy disk. As Alison rolls her eyes in irritation and heads out to her car, Billy chides Amanda for cracking the whip too hard - but Amanda says she's merely expecting Alison to do the job the way she was expected to do it back when she was in the position.

Jane urges Sydney to go out to a movie tonight, then hands her some cash and says it's her treat. Sydney correctly guesses that she has a date, and Jane admits she invited Sam over for dinner and doesn't want her younger sister third-wheeling it with them. Sydney gets all judgey and says it's a little soon to be dating, given that she and Michael aren't even divorced yet - but Jane brusquely says she doesn't need a second opinion on how to live her life and stalks out of the room.

At the hospital, Michael canoodles Kimberly in the hallway, and the two agree to meet up at the beach house after their shifts to get it on.

Dr. Katya Petrova drops by Matt's office to tell him she needs to find a permanent home for a patient, in order for her to avoid being shipped off to a shitty county hospital. Matt tells her he'll do his very best to find something suitable.

Billy asks Amanda to meet up with him in the park so he can give her low-down on the Keith-induced trauma that Alison has been enduring for the last three episodes. Amanda looks shocked and horrified and says she had no idea that any of this was happening - but points out that if Alison insists on coming to work every day as if nothing's wrong, she has no choice but to expect her to be at least halfway functional on the job. Billy urges her to give Alison enough time and space to recover, then makes it clear she has no idea that he's spilling the beans to her boss about her temporary mental health issues.
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"Alison's going to be an unproductive head case for the foreseeable future."

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"Now there's a startling revelation."

Jane and Sam are having a lovely dinner, and both agree that they thoroughly enjoy each other's company. He tells her he's glad they didn't spend the entire evening Michael-bashing, and she concurs and says that that'd be a colossal waste of energy. The two then raise their glasses and toast to a future of making good memories.

Amanda drops by Jake's Bikes to once again try to convince him to agree to be the Sage Brush Beer Spokesman, and explains that she prefers to cast "real people living real life". Jake makes an ew face and says it's just not him, but agrees to listen to her final sales pitch over a beer. Amanda's like, "Kewl!" and grabs her purse...and unwittingly knocks over a blow-torch in the process. Egads!

Jane and Sam are making out on the couch - but Jane pulls away and says she's not ready to jump into a new romance...and also wants to be entirely sure that she's not hooking up with him to get revenge on Michael for his philandering. Sam says he's good with that, encourages her to take however much time she needs in order to be absolutely sure that she wants to be with him, then assures her that his attraction to her has absolutely nothing to do with sticking it to Michael.

Jo arrives at Jake's Bikes and notices smoke billowing from the workroom. She runs to the back of the building...and when the door handle is too hot to turn, she stupidly throws a rock through the window part of the door, which causes the fire to gain in intensity, and screeches, "Jakkkkkke!"

As the firemen put out the fire, Jo stares at the shop in tears when Jake and Amanda return from Shooters. He cries, "What happened?" and Jo hugs him and says she thought he was inside, then collapses against him and says she nearly got killed trying to brave the flames and save him.

When Sydney finishes sleeping in, she tells Jane she sat through a boring double feature so she could have her privacy with Sam. Jane thanks her for staying away and says that the date went really well, and that Sam's an awesome listener.

Sydney makes a beeline over to Michael's beach house to blab about Jane inviting Sam over for an intimate dinner. Michael looks miffed and mutters, "Sam..?", then asks Sydney why she's telling him this. She shrugs and says she figured he'd be happy with this latest development, 'cause now Jane won't spend so much of her energy trying to make his life miserable...and I have to admit that that actually is kind of a valid observation.
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"I'm here to report that Jane is dating your former best friend."

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"I'm thrilled."

At D&D, Amanda hovers over Alison as she taps away at her computer and remarks, "That's clerical work." Alison self-piteously says it's all she has left, so Amanda acknowledges that she may have been hasty in stripping her of all responsibility and tells her to go back to doing client work - in particular focusing exclusively on the Famous Family Restaurants account. Alison looks at her suspiciously and asks her if anyone put her up to this, and Amanda breezily says she's merely being fair.

Mr. Harris, Jake's insurance agent, reports that the charred bike shop is a total loss, and that he's going to need to look over the accounting books to determine the fair value of the business. After he leaves, Jake growls about what a total failure he is - but Jo points out that the fire was an accident, and that he's going to have a lot of choices about what to do with the insurance money. Jake says that his first order of business will be to pay her her 50K investment back, then says in his opinion the fire is a total disaster...and that if he ever decides to start up a new shop, he'll do it alone, aka without dragging anyone else down with him.

Michael races over to the construction site to angrily confront Sam. He demands to know how long he's been dating his wife, and Sam's all, "Wuh?" and says they just had one dinner together...before reminding him that Jane is his soon-to-be ex-wife. Michael takes a swing at him, but Sam easily blocks his fist, shoves him to the ground, and tells him to get the hell off of his construction site. Haha!

Mr. Harris tells Jake and Jo that the Fire Department has concluded that the fire is suspicious, not least 'cause of the dire financial situation the bike shop was in at the time. Jake angrily denies setting the fire, and complains that after dutifully paying his insurance premiums each month, he's unable to get help when he needs it. Mr. Harris ignores his bitching and makes it clear that the company's decision regarding a payout will be based on the results of the arson investigation.

Alison is at Shooters, guzzling martinis when Billy seats himself next to her at the bar. She tells him she knows he spoke to Amanda about Keith's self-inflicted mercy killing - despite her asking him not to tell anyone. Billy says he had no choice 'cause she's throwing her career away, not to mention endangering the wellbeing of her liver with all the binge-drinking she's been indulging in over the last several weeks. He implores her to pull herself together, fight back, and stop sabotaging herself - otherwise she's going to lose everything she loves. 

Sam drops by Jane's apartment to ask her why in blazes she'd drag Michael into their budding romance...and when Jane scrunches her face confusedly, he explains that Michael confronted him at work about their date. Jane says she hasn't seen Michael in weeks - which means that someone else must have told him...and the two glance over at Sydney, who's pretending to still be asleep on the pullout couch. Jane apologizes to Sam for putting him in the middle of her pre-divorce woes and kisses him goodbye. Sydney springs out of bed and denies to Jane that she had anything to do with informing Michael about her new love life and suggests that maybe he hired someone to spy on her.

Michael is so irked at the visual of Sam and Jane getting it on that he's unable to perform in the sack with Kimberly. She coos about how totally understandable it is that he's so tense, and he retorts by bitchily complaining that she could put a little more effort into making him happy...and I genuinely have no idea what he means by that, or why a smart doctor like Kimberly continues to stick in out with this stupidly toxic relationship.

Matt tells Katya that he found a room for her patient at Glen Acres...and explains that he was able to get her to the top of the list 'cause he used to work with the director of Glen Acres. Katya squeals happily and says in return she'd love to cook him dinner tomorrow night. He's like, "Er, OK..?" so she chirps, "It's a date!" and gives him a cheek kiss...then skips down the hall, leaving Matt staring after her muttering, "A date..?"
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"I make an excellent beard...if you happen to know anyone who's looking."

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"I'll check with any gay people I know."

Alison invites Billy to stroll along the beach with her so she can tell him how much she appreciates his tough love and lament about how much Keith made her doubt her judgement. She acknowledges that she has to make changes in her life, starting with an immediate ban on over-boozing...and Billy's all, "Hurray!" and promises to support her through her desperately needed mental rehabilitation.

Jake returns home and tells Jo that the charred remains of his shop have been demolished, and that it all fit into one dump truck. Jo says she's confused by the Fire Department's suspicion that the fire was deliberately set, which prompts Jake to stare at her incredulously and ask if she truly thinks he'd really torch his own shop. She declines to answer and says she's off to bed...leaving Jake staring despondently into space.
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1 Comment
Kristin
2/26/2021 10:51:15 am

I absolutely LOVE these Melrose Place recaps......please keep them coming! You made it through the most boring season (1) and now it’s fun time!!!

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