Recap: Kelly tells Clare she hasn't had a good night's rest since Joey ran away from the shelter...and Clare's like, "Whatever" and gripes about how insensitive Steve is about everything, particularly the boorish way in which he demands his quota of sex. Ew. She looks contemplative for a few seconds and says she's going to sink to his level, but doesn't elaborate. Not that I want her to. Not that it even matters, since the two permanently break up nine episodes from now. After Clare heads off to class, Kelly checks on her plants on the patio, where - surprise! - Joey's been hiding. He reveals himself to Kelly and tearfully says he doesn't want to go back to the stupid shelter, and Kelly hugs him and promises him he doesn't have to.
The Walsh house. As Valerie staggers into the kitchen, Brandon jokingly marvels over her stamina, and how she has enough energy to go to class all day, work at the After Dark all night, and hang with her new boy toy, Jason Lewis. He tells her he's been emailing with Jim and Cindy, who want him to visit them in Hong Kong during spring break. He says they're sending two tickets, so Valerie volunteers herself to accompany him - but Brandon asks her if she really wants to leave a hottie like Jason Lewis unattended in L.A. She considers it but decides she doesn't want to risk him getting snapped up by another opportunistic female, then suggests he invite Tracy to Hong Kong. Brandon mulls that over, but doesn't look thrilled by the prospect.
Kelly gives Joey a bowl of cereal, then tells him to give her enough deets so that she can locate his family and get him shipped home. He tells her his name is Joey Evers and that he's from Santa Fe...and he ran away from home because he doesn't like his new stepdad and feels left out 'cause his mom's about to have a baby. What a dumb little turd. Kelly asks him if he could be reading the situation wrong, but he insists he isn't. She tells him she knows what it's like to have to adjust to a new stepfather, then acknowledges how hard it must be to watch his mom get caught up in a whole new life. Joey bitterly retorts that his mom and stepdad are probably happy he's gone, and he figures that this explains why they haven't found him yet.
California University. David runs into Donna at the Student Union, and hugs her and gushes about how in love with her he is. He says he's so invigorated by her grandmother's story (as told in the previous episode), that he figures if love can conquer all, maybe it can conquer Felice's deep-seated hatred of him (not likely). Donna scrunches her big face and moans, "Please.." but he insists that he wants her mom to see him for who he really is and find a better way for them to communicate. Donna tells him she doesn't care if her uppity mother refuses to accept him as her true love, and would prefer it if he didn't stir things up.
Elsewhere in the Student Union, Steve tells Brandon that Rush is freaking out over the hurricane that's reportedly headed toward California...and since he's stuck in Seattle, he wants Steve to take measures to protect his new Malibu beach house from getting damaged. Steve says this means he's going to have to drive over to Malibu and sandbag the place and could use a little help from his friends. Brandon offers to give him a hand, then tells him about the two round trip tickets to Hong Kong his parents are sending him. Steve offers to go 'cause he could really use a break from Clare and her constant need to discuss their feelings. Brandon says he can totally relate to that, then starts railing about how annoying it is to have to discuss women's feelings all the damn time. A few seconds later, Tracy arrives, and Steve beats a hasty retreat. Brandon fills Tracy in about Steve's plea for help sandbagging his dad's new Malibu house, and she says she's in. She then tells him she's planning on visiting her parents' ranch during spring break and wants him to come along so he can meet his future in-laws. Brandon declines and explains that his parents want him to spend his spring break in Hong Kong...and she's like, "OK", gives him a quick kiss, then heads off to the library.
Valerie drops in on Jason Lewis, who's fixing up his Hollywood Hills fixer-upper. He whines about how his manager, Alan, keeps calling him a star - which, he points out, "is nothing but a big ball of gas". Valerie reminds him that a lot of people would love to be in his shoes and says, "You should enjoy it" and he replies, "I'm enjoyingyou." He asks her if she'd mind reading a script that Alan just gave him, then help him decide whether or not it should be his next movie. Valerie perks up at the desirable task and chirps, "I'd love to."
The Peach Pit. Nat gives Steve a heads up that Clare's not acting like her usual self; she's wearing lumberjack clothing and just ordered a double mega-cheeseburger with fries. Steve furrows his brows and murmurs, "She never eats like that" and rushes over to Clare's table to see whassup. Clare is, indeed, decked out in a shapeless flannel shirt, and is reading the sports section of the newspaper. Steve scrunches his face in confusion, so Clare explains that she feels bad about all her whining and negativity...and so she went and did something about it: she volunteered for a science project that entails giving women testosterone injections. LOL. She shows him the bandage on her arm and says she just got a shot (hence the flannel). Gullible Steve looks horrified as Clare loudly belches and tells him they should head over to Malibu, like pronto, so they can start sandbagging.
David drops by Dr. Martin's office to discuss "matters of the heart". He assures Dr. Martin that while things are sublime with Donna, he's growing increasingly concerned about Felice's snooty bitchitude toward him. As he natters on and on about his concerns, Dr. Martin suddenly looks shaky and sweaty...and when he stands up to move past his desk, he promptly keels over and lands in David's arms. David yells for the nurse, who rushes in, shrieks, "OMG!" and calls 911 as David cradles Dr. Martin's head in his lap.
Someone at the hospital calls Donna on her car phone to inform her that her father just had a stroke and is in critical condition. She heads right to the hospital and learns from the doctor that because her father was brought in so quickly, it's unlikely he suffered any brain damage. David appears from out of nowhere and tells her he was with her dad when he collapsed...and Donna's all, "Wha-a?" but has to put a pin in that for now 'cause she has to figure out how to break the news to her mom, who's vacationing on a cruise ship.
Beach house. Kelly's busily looking up everyone with the last name Evers in Santa Fe so she can connect with Joey's family, ship the mulleted lad home, and finally wrap up this tedious story arc. This task could get done a lot faster if the dumb little brat would just give Kelly his mother's contact info.
The Walsh house. Tracy's packing sodas and snacks for a day of sandbagging in Malibu. Valerie tells her she can't go 'cause she's too busy reading Jason Lewis' movie script. LOL. She asks Tracy if Brandon made a decision about going to Hong Kong, and Tracy says he's definitely going...and Valerie says, "That'll be fun for you two." Tracy explains that she'll be visiting her parents during spring break, so Valerie asks what he's doing with the other ticket, and Tracy's all, "Other ticket..? Wha-a?!" At that moment, Brandon arrives home, and Valerie wisely beats a hasty retreat. Tracy asks Brandon whassup with him getting two tickets to Hong Kong, then asks him why he didn't invite her. He says he figured she'd want to visit her parents...and she asks him if he's even told Jim and Cindy about her, and he replies, "They know you exist...they just don't know your name." Ouch, Brandon. Tracy angrily storms out.
Beach house. Joey's browsing through Kelly's photo albums, and she points out her various stepfathers. Joey says he misses his dad (who recently died) and that his mom is expecting a baby girl with her new husband. Kelly says she misses her dad, despite the fact that he's a total deadbeat. She then tells him she's off to Malibu to help her friend sandbag his dad's luxury house, and Joey perks up at that and says he'd like to come along.
The Peach Pit. Valerie enters the diner and sees Jason Lewis sitting with his manager, Alan. Jason Lewis asks her if she read the movie script he gave her, and she says she did, but doesn't think it's a good role for him. Alan's all, "What the hell do you know about showbiz?", but Valerie says she thinks it's the wrong project for Jason Lewis 'cause the lead character is much too unlikable and irredeemable. Jason Lewis said he liked the script, then mopishly adds, "But I don't know nuthin' about nuthin'." Valerie shrugs at an incensed Alan and says she's merely offering her opinion, then wishes them both luck and saunters off. Alan glares after her and grumbles, "Talk about high maintenance."
Hospital. Donna begs the doctor to let her see her dad, and her warns her he's in pretty rough shape...but she insists she doesn't care, so he tells her he'll see what he can do. Donna asks David what he was doing at her dad's office, then snarks at him for "stirring things up" and accuses him of causing his stroke. As David opens his mouth to protest the bitchy accusation, a nurse comes over and tells Donna she can see her dad now. Donna rushes to his room and finds him with his eyes open but unresponsive. Freaky. She lays her head on his bedside and silently weeps.
Malibu. The 90210 gang is busily sandbagging Rush's house when Kelly arrives with Joey in tow. Steve tells Brandon how icked out he is by Clare's sudden testosterone-fuelled manliness...and Brandon tells him that Tracy's not even talking to him. A few seconds later, Brandon goes over to where Tracy's sandbagging and explains that he hasn't seen his parents in a really long time and also figured that Hong Kong would be too boring for her. He then back pedals and says that clearly it's important to her, so he invites her to accompany him. She shoots him the stink-eye and snarks, "Let me make this simple: I don't want to go!" and storms off. I'm soooready for these two to call it a day.
After Dark. Jason Lewis calls Valerie while she's busy doing paperwork at the club. He apologizes for how badly things went with Alan, then says he'd like to see her tonight...and she happily accepts and says she'll be over later.
Hospital. David arrives with some sustenance for Donna, but she says she's not hungry. David insists that he's not responsible for her dad's stroke, but Donna still thinks he might have pushed too hard. David says that all he did was tell him how much he loves her and wants a future with her...and Donna finally softens and apologizes for bitchily blaming him for causing the stroke, then says she's scared that her dad's life is slowly slipping away. David tells her to try to think more positively.
Malibu. Rush's house is fully sandbagged, and Steve is at the barbecue, grilling food for everyone. Tracy, meanwhile, scrunches her face unhappily as she watches Brandon and Kelly hang out together inside the house. Kelly confides to Brandon that Clare is faking her manliness...then brings up his Hong Kong trip and says he must be very excited. Brandon says he is, but Tracy's incessant sulking is dampening the joy for him. A few seconds later, Tracy enters the house and announces that all roads leading in and out of Malibu have been closed due to an accident, so it looks like they'll all have to spend the night. Kelly's cell phone rings, and it's a frantic sounding woman calling from New Mexico: Joey's mother. Thank God. Kelly tells her about how Joey found refuge at her beach apartment, and doesn't feel like anyone in his family cares about him now that she's remarried, blah blah. The mother assures Kelly that she and her husband have been worried sick, and that they'll be on the first plane to L.A. to collect Joey. She thanks Kelly profusely and calls her a savior...but not an angel, 'cause St. Donna already holds that title.
Valerie arrives at Jason Lewis' house...and he's made it all romantic with lit candles everywhere and has the fireplace going. He shows her a hand-carved mirror frame he made (for her..?) and asks her what she thinks, and she purrs, "I think I'll stay the night." Mmm hmm.. She steers him over to the bed/mattress in front of the fire, and the two get busy.
Hospital. Donna wakes up in her dad's hospital room, but he's still in the same, freaky looking vegetative state. She says good morning, then urges him to wake up.
Malibu. Clare pokes Steve awake and demands sex, but he's not into the rough foreplay and wails, "I can't take it anymore!" She tries to mount him, but he shoves her off of him and orders her to quit "this hormone trip" - otherwise they're done. She points out that the behavior he's been complaining about is what's been bugging her lately...and he mulls that over and murmurs, "Used, taken for granted.." and Clare concurs and says, "I've been you." Steve's all, "Wha-a?!" so she rips off her arm bandage and confesses that her story about getting testosterone shots has been a lie. She says it hasn't been pretty behaving like him...and he's surprised at his rude and insensitive behavior. He apologizes then invites her for a calm walk on the beach...and she accepts, and the two share a gentle kiss.
The next morning, Kelly notices that Tracy is MIA, and Brandon tells her she fled once the roads re-opened. Steve ambles downstairs and happily reports that the storm didn't hit California after all. Brandon suggests taking down the sandbags, but Steve says that his dad will be in town later today, and he wants to get full credit for all the hard work they put in yesterday.
Kelly finds Joey on the beach and chats with him about stepdads, and how much she hated Mel at first, blah blah...but then realized she was being a big jerk, and now thinks of Mel as another great person in her life. She points out to Joey that his stepdad is giving his mom a second chance at love and maybe he's someone Joey will be able to count on in life. Suddenly, a curly haired woman appears and screeches, "Joey!" and he's like, "Mom!" then gets up and runs over to her and hurls himself into her arms. He says a shy hey to his grisly looking stepdad, and then all three share a family hug while Kelly looks on approvingly.
After Dark. Alan drops by to cut a deal with Valerie. He tells her that the writers of the movie script are doing a major rewrite, and he wants her to use her powers of persuasion with Jason Lewis to get him to accept the lead role. Valerie tells him she can't guarantee that, but says that she and Jason Lewis will make their decision once they've read the new script. Alan says he needs a guarantee now, then hands her a check for $10,000 and promises another $10,000 after Jason Lewis signs. Valerie mulls that over for a few seconds and happily accepts the bribe.
The Peach Pit. Kelly tells Nat about Joey's happy ending, then looks sad and says she's really going to miss the mulleted brat. Whatever, Kelly. Nat tells her that whenever she feels maternal urges, she's welcome to babysit his spawn, Frankie. Elsewhere in the diner, Tracy apologizes to Brandon for her bitchitude yesterday and says they should just go on their spring breaks, forget about his extra ticket to Hong Kong, and see what happens when they get back (e.g. the inevitable breakup). Brandon insists he's ready to take the next step with her, then invites her to tag along to Hong Kong. She happily accepts, and the two smooch while Kelly scowls.
Hospital. The doctor wakes Donna, who's asleep in the waiting room, and tells her her dad's awake and wants to see her. She and David rush over to his room, and a conscious Dr. Martin whispers, "Hello, Precious." She says, "It's me, Donna" and Dr. Martin gives her a weak smile and squeaks, "Who else would my precious be?" Donna tears up, clutches his hand, and promises him that everything is going to be A-OK.
Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!