Recap: David's on the air, whining to his non-existent listeners about how he hasn't eaten, slept, or talked to his girlfriend in three weeks. What girlfriend? Didn't he give Donna the heave-ho for not putting out two episodes ago? An annoyed looking Howard enters the radio station, knocks on the glass and says they need to talk. He orders David to knock off his self-indulgent bellyaching and improve his dreary playlist. David pleads for something to take the edge off of his downward meth spiral, but Howard just flippantly tells him to go to a doctor. David reminds him that he was the one who got him hooked on the nasty-ass drug in the first place, and complains that he can't sleep, think, or lower his scary high heart-rate. Howard is unsympathetic to his problems and tells him to stop taking any more meth.
Beach house. Donna's packing for a ski trip and shows Kelly (who's trying to snooze on the couch) her gear and accessories. Donna invites Kelly to come on the trip, but she declines and says she hates the cold. Donna then asks her to keep an eye on David while she's gone, and Kelly rolls her eyes and says he's a big boy who can take care of himself. Donna regrets not inviting him along on the ski trip - which would have been weird and dumb - and Kelly must agree with me 'cause she reminds her idiot friend that David dumped her like yesterday's news and has been acting like a total douchewad lately. She advises Donna to get out of town, not worry about David, and have some fun. David arrives home, and when Donna tries to make pleasant small talk, he snaps at her in his normal rude fashion. Instead of leaving well enough alone, Donna follows David to his room and says she doesn't want to go on her ski trip with him mad at her. He assures her he isn't...and when she invites him to come along to Big Bear, he says he promised Mel he'd babysit Erin over the weekend. He sneers, "Have a good time and don't think about me" and reminds her that his life is no longer her concern. Donna argues that it is her concern since they're living in the same apartment, and then says she's worried about his edgy, nasty behavior. He bitchily retorts that he wouldn't be such a miserable shitbag if he had a girlfriend who was capable of a mature relationship - and Donna looks dismayed that he's once again bringing up her anti-sex policy as the root cause of their breakup. She tells him there's more to life than sex, which makes him snap, "And how would you know?" Ouch...but fair point. Donna gets all huffy and snarks that she'll decide when and with whom she'll have sex and not be pressured into it, blah blah...and David looks as bored as I've become with her virginal pronouncements and says he's heard all that before. Donna angrily retorts that she's glad he's not coming on the ski trip and that she can't stand the sight of him anymore. She storms out of his room and slams the door behind her.
The Walsh house. Brandon, Brenda, and Steve are about to leave for Big Bear, and Mama Walsh is finishing up packing up a gigantic cooler filled with drinks and snacks for the two and a half hour drive. Brenda announces that Ahn-drea canceled on them because she has the "flu" - and this bums out Brenda because she no longer has anyone to ski the bunny hills with. Papa Walsh enters the kitchen wearing a bathrobe that showcases his furry chest. He asks the kids if Dylan is going on the ski trip, and Brandon informs him that he's staying in town to take care of Erica. The phone rings and it's Donna, calling to cancel. Brenda insists that she has to come, since they're staying at the Martins' lake house. Donna whimpers about the fight she just had with David and says he was really bitchy to her...so Brenda orders her to stop feeling sorry for herself and not allow David to ruin their vacation. She says that happiness is the best revenge, and that they'll be at the beach house in fifteen minutes to pick her up. After they leave, Mama Walsh tells her husband she'd love to take in a movie that afternoon, but Papa Walsh declines because he has to work and also schedule a meeting with Dylan. He did some checking on Suzanne and has something important to share with him.
Beach. Dylan is eager to teach Erica to surf, but she's too afraid to get into the water.
Beach house. Kelly's on the phone with Jackie, who's agitated because Mel has Erin for the weekend...or something like that. Kelly admonishes her mom for acting like such a nutcase over the custody dispute, says she's too hysterical to have a conversation with, then hangs up. David, meanwhile, has trudged into the kitchen for something to eat and is irritably rummaging through the cupboards for some food. Kelly complains that Jackie has "lost it", and David snaps that it isn't his problem. Kelly asks him whassup with his shitty attitude, and says she's noticed he hasn't been eating, sleeping, and that he constantly bitches about everything. David snarkishly rattles off a long list of reasons explaining why his life sucks, and Kelly asks him point blank if he's doing drugs. He immediately gets defensive, so she assures him she's not passing judgement but knows what it's like to grow up with a druggie parent. David denies using drugs, but says if he did have a drug problem he'd definitely come to her for help...and insists that all he needs is some sleep. Kelly envelopes him in a sisterly hug, and he thanks her and says he needed that. The two head out to pick up Erin for the afternoon.
Beach. On dry land, Dylan teaches Erica how to stand up on a surfboard. But Erica continues to refuse to go into the water, and finally admits that she doesn't know how to swim.
Mel's office. Kelly and David arrive to pick up adorable little Erin. Kelly tells Mel they're taking her to the park, and adds that she's free all afternoon except for an hour-long appointment after lunch - a detail that will be important to the subplot later. Mel asks how Jackie is doing, and Kelly chirps, "Loony" and Mel jokes, "What else is new?" As they head out, David says he has to use the bathroom, but then sneaks back into the examining room and rummages through the cabinets. He finds a big bottle of codeine pills, swallows a couple, and takes an additional handful.
Big Bear. Donna limps over to a bench, and a cute-ish ski instructor named Chad asks her if she needs help. She complains about a painful blister on her foot, and after some annoying, flirtatious banter, he pulls off her ski boot. She thanks him for his help and says she's had enough of the slopes for one day. He tells her he's due for his break and invites her to have lunch with him, and she happily accepts.
Campus Health Services. Ahn-drea tells the doctor she thinks she's coming down with the flu, so the doctor checks her vitals and says she'll also do a blood test. Ahn-drea requests an AIDS test and blathers about how she doesn't think she's in a high risk category since she's always been careful about having safe sex. Sort of. The doctor gives her an AIDS test form to fill out and tells her to come back tomorrow for her results.
Public pool. Dylan is trying to get Erica to feel comfortable in the water, but she just whines that it's too cold and says she's too afraid to dunk her head underwater. She says she wants to get out because her stomach hurts...but when Dylan chides her for giving up so easily, she sticks her head in the water for a few seconds. Dylan cheers her bravery, and I fought the urge to press the fast-forward button on my remote.
Playground. Kelly plays in the sand with Erin...but then Erin gets bored and toddles over to a creepish old woman sitting on a nearby bench. The woman tells her she'd love a hug and offers Erin a cookie...and David looks ready to take the free cookie, but then Kelly rushes over and lectures him on the dangers of accepting food from a stranger. David apologizes to Kelly for being "out of whack" during the past couple of weeks, and assures her that his out-of-whackness is all behind him. Erin, meanwhile, spots an ice-cream truck and runs over to it, and an exasperated Kelly exclaims, "Why is she always running off like this?" Because the plot demands it, Kelly. She chases after her little sister while David strolls over and asks Erin if she'd like to have an ice-cream. Kelly says he shouldn't reward Erin for her bad behavior, but he insists on buying the cute little tot a treat. Kelly throws in the towel and says, "Do whatever you want" and announces that she's leaving for her appointment...'cause, yeah, what could go wrong with leaving strung out David in charge of a toddler?
Big Bear. Donna and Chad are eating lunch together. He tells her that she and her feet are very cute, then asks her if she comes to Big Bear a lot. Donna tells him that her parents own a lake house, and when she describes which one it is, he gushes that it's the fanciest one on the street...and Donna pretends to modestly disagree. Brenda suddenly enters the chalet and joins their table. She rebukes Donna for abandoning her on the bunny hill, and complains that she spent most of the morning on her butt. Chad offers to enlist his ski instructor friend to make up a foursome and give them some lessons, and Donna says that that sounds great. He leaves to go back to work after arranging to meet up with Donna later. Once he's out of earshot, Donna turns toward Brenda with a big smile and announces that she's having a great time...and Brenda grins back at her.
Playground. Kelly has returned from her appointment and looks around for David and Erin. She spots David snoozing on a park bench, but little Erin is nowhere to be found. She rushes over to David, rouses him awake, and asks him where Erin is...and he groggily tells her he has no idea. The two dart around the playground, frantically calling Erin's name. Kelly asks various people in the park if they've seen a little girl wearing overalls and a purple sweater, but they all just stare back at her blankly.
Police station. David and Kelly report Erin missing, and the on-duty detective grimly tells them that a child can disappear in an instant, especially if an abductor is involved. Kelly gives him a description of Erin and what she was wearing...and shortly after that, Mel rushes into the station and asks what happened. He initially looks pissed off when David tells him that he fell asleep in the park. The detective tells Mel they've been trying to reach his wife, then insinuates that she may have taken the child. Kelly insists that Jackie wouldn't do such a thing, but when the detective asks her about Jackie's state of mind, Kelly has to admit that she's been very upset about the custody dispute lately. David, meanwhile, continues to blame himself, as well he should since there's no way that Erin's disappearance isn't totally his fault...and maybe a little Kelly's.
Public pool. When Erica doesn't emerge from the women's locker room, Dylan asks two little girls if they noticed a frizzy-haired twelve year old. They tell him yes, and that she looks really upset. Dylan enters the locker room and finds Erica sitting on a bench looking dejected. When she sees him, she runs into a bathroom stall and tells him to go away. He tells her he's not leaving, and when he tries to coax her out of the stall, a woman enters and tells Dylan to get out of the women's locker room - otherwise she'll call security. This prompts Erica to emerge from her hiding spot, and she explains to the woman that Dylan is her brother. Dylan asks the woman if he and his li'l sis can have a minute alone, and she gives him a snarky reply, but then wanders off to give them their privacy. Dylan asks Erica what's wrong, but she's too embarrassed to say it, so he urges her to just blurt it out. She tells him she just got her first period...and Dylan looks like a deer caught in headlights and goes, "Oh." He asks her if she knows what to do, and she says she has no idea and wishes her mom were in town. Dylan says he knows what the next best thing is...and immediately rushes the menstruating little moppet over to the Walsh house.
Mama Walsh tends to Erica's menstruation needs, then assures Dylan that she's fine. She says it's a very big day in a girl's life and feels the need to give Dylan a celebratory hug. Erica enters the room and Dylan congratulates her, which seemed sorta weird. She asks him if she looks any different, and he pretends that she suddenly looks taller. Mama Walsh invites them to stay for supper and tells Dylan that Papa Walsh wanted to talk to him about something important anyway. Dylan happily accepts.
Big Bear. Steve suggests that the four of them have dinner at a nearby Italian restaurant, but Donna declines and says she's not that hungry. Brenda immediately realizes what she's up to, and reminds her that she hardly knows Chad, and bitchily warns her not do anything stupid. Like what? Compromise her sainted virginity by jumping in the sack with him? I highly doubt it.
The Walsh house. Papa Walsh tells Dylan that when he checked out Suzanne's social security number, he discovered an account in her name that has $25,000 in it...then hands him the documented proof. Since she's been claiming poverty, Papa Walsh is certain she has something shady up her sleeve. Dylan thinks there must be some kind of explanation, but a skeptical Papa Walsh warns him to be careful.
Police station. Mel, Kelly, and David are still waiting at the police station for any word on Erin. Jackie bursts in and immediately gets angry and hysterical when the police detective suggests that she was the one who kidnapped Erin. After railing nonsensically for a little while, she goes limp, starts crying, and hugs Mel. David apologizes to Jackie for losing Erin, but she graciously tells him that her disappearance isn't his fault. The hell it isn't. David continues to look guilty and sheepish.
Big Bear. Donna and Chad sit by the fire, chat and play kissy face. He tries to invite himself over to the Martins' lake house, but Donna tells him she can't do it since she's in love with someone else. Chad looks disappointed and asks why this someone isn't here, so Donna admits that they just broke up. She thought she was over him, but it turns out she isn't. Chad looks very bummed and calls David a "lucky guy", and Donna demurely says he doesn't think he's a lucky guy. Chad gallantly offers to drive to L.A. and kick David's butt (something I would have enjoyed, as David's been in desperate need of an ass-kicking since the Christmas episode), but Donna says she'll do that for herself. He makes one last ditch effort and says he'd like to see her again if things between her and David don't work out. The two share another kiss before he offers to drive her home, and Donna coos at him for being such a nice guy. OMFG, this scene was so nauseating on so many levels.
Police station. David paces around nervously, which drives Kelly nuts and she barks at him to stop. Suddenly, the detective emerges from his office and says that police have just located a child matching Erin's description at a house not far from the park. Apparently the housekeeper found her, but because she's an illegal immigrant and is afraid of being deported, she was hesitant to call the police. A few seconds later, a female police officer enters the station carrying Erin, and the Taylor/Silver clan is happy and relieved that the cute little tot was found unharmed.
Dylan's house. Suzanne returns from Iowa...and she thanks Dylan for watching Erica. She's about to head off to bed when Dylan asks her when she was going to tell him about the $25,000. Suzanne backs up and asks, "How the hell did you know about that?" so he tells her that his business manager found the account. She looks annoyed that he checked upon her after all...but admits that she'd probably do the same thing if she were in his shoes. She tells him that the money is the insurance settlement from the trailer (they supposedly used to live in), and claims that she didn't know for sure she'd get anything or how much she'd get, and that the insurance company wired the money to her account three days ago. She then hangs her head in fake shame and announces that she and Erica will clear out the following morning - hurray!! - but when Dylan doesn't try to stop her, she pulls out an old photo of herself and Jack. She says she was in love with him - but that those were "wild days" so she has no guarantee that Erica is really Jack's daughter. Wait - wuh? This is such a different story from the one she was pedaling when she first arrived in town. Dylan, oddly, doesn't have much of a reaction to this gigantic red flag. Erica wakes up, then comes into the living room and hugs her mom hello. Dylan gazes over at Erica and tells Suzanne he doesn't need any guarantees...he knows he has a sister. Well that's just dumb. Get a DNA test and find out for sure.
Beach house. David and Kelly return home, exhausted after the stressful day. David once again tells Kelly that Erin's disappearance was all his fault, and admits that he didn't just fall asleep - he was crashing after a meth high. He starts crying and tells Kelly about how he stole codeine from his dad's dental office so he could sleep...but it hit him very hard and caused him to pass out. Kelly looks shocked and murmurs, "Oh my God, David." David begs her not to hate him and says he doesn't know what he would have done if Erin hadn't been found. Kelly assures him she doesn't hate him and gives him a hug. He apologizes again and pleads for her help, and she promises to give it to him.
Campus Health Services. Ahn-drea shows up for her follow-up appointment wearing a shapeless dress and dark blazer to camouflage her real life pregnancy. The doctor gives her the good news that she's healthy and doesn't have AIDS, then drops the bomb that she's pregnant...and that she can openly wear maternity clothes from now on.
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Recapper: Isabel K. French
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