Recap: Lauren tells Lo she has plans to meet up with Holly tonight at S Bar, adding that she's worried about Holly being so fixated on the prospect of reuniting her and Heidi as BFFs. Lo mulls over the unlikelihood of that ever happening, then shrugs and says that meeting Holly for drinks is probably harmless. While lunching in the very foresty Epic Records break room, Audrina tells Chiara she has a date with a dud named Colin, aka a guy she's known for a year and (until now) never really considered datable. She says she purposely didn't tell Justin about the upcoming date 'cause he doesn't always tell her who he's two-timing her with...and when Chiara asks her if she's trying to make the boorish slob jealous, she smilingly admits, "A little" - but then points out that since there's no ring on her finger, she has every right to date whoever she wants. Over lunch at Cuvee, Heidi asks Holly about her recent get togethers with Lauren, so Holly tells her that Lauren seems really happy, except that, "Seems like she was missing you." A wistful Heidi says she would looooove to be able to be hanging out and reminiscing along with them - but isn't allowed to 'cause of something she had nothing to do with, then tears up and laments the emotional grief of having lost a best friend. Holly reminds her that she had wanted to write Lauren a letter...and when Heidi says she'd write one if she thought Lauren would read it, Holly eggs her on to do it, assuring her that Lauren "knows who you are...she knows your heart". Audrina is on her dinner date with Colin and natters about how much fun her fake job at Epic Records is, then takes a sip of her drink and remarks on how strong it is. She further comments about how some people drink too much and subsequently get into fights, kiss busty redheads in front of her, and act all annoyingly cocky...and by some people, she's naturally referring to Justin. A dismayed Colin does his best to steer clear of Justin being a topic of continued conversation and assures her that he's super chill whenever he's had one too many...and before she can slip in another musing about what an insufferable jerkwad Justin can be every time he boozes it up, Colin hastily compliments her eyes and asks her if she'd like to get together again tomorrow. Holly arrives at S Bar and hugs Lauren and Lo hello...and then she and Lauren reminisce about how much gosh darn fun they (meaning the two of them + Heidi) used to have in the old days. Holly dishes that when Heidi started dating Spencer it was really hard for the family to ever get a hold of her, which caused them all to drift apart...then abruptly changes gears and tells Lauren that lately Heidi has been talking about how much she misses her. Lauren shrugs and calls their imploded friendship "water under the bridge" and firmly says that the situation today is not what it was in the carefree days of yore. Lauren arrives at People's Revolution and hands Whitney a letter she just received from Heidi, inviting her to read it aloud. Whitney obliges...and the letter is largely an apology for anything hurtful she's ever done since Season 2, and a declaration that she takes responsibility - I guess for Spencer starting the (largely overblown) sex tape rumor. The letter continues with a pronouncement that she will cherish their good memories, followed by some lamenting about how horribly things turned out, and a complaint about how difficult this has been for her. Whitney's all, "Yeesh" and says her takeaway from the letter is that Heidi seems lost, lonely, and suffering from a deficit of gal pals. Lauren, meanwhile, highlights the fact that, even after everything, Heidi still can't blame Spencer for being the direct cause of their rift due to his direct role in Sex Tape-Gate...and Whitney dismayingly concurs, "That's loyalty." Audrina meets up once more with Colin and tells him she's soooo tired today 'cause Justin called last night and prevented her from getting a full night's sleep. Colin mutters, "That sucks", then calls her out for not being able to shut up about Justin whenever they're out on dates. Audrina weakly insists that she and Justin aren't girlfriend/boyfriend - but that she's known him for a long time and he keeps trying to pull her back into his orbit. Colin mumbles, "That's tough" as he stares despondently into space, no doubt aware that his brief airtime on The Hills has just come to an unceremonious end. Holly drops by Lauren's house to hang out, order takeout, and ask Lauren if she received Heidi's letter. Lauren grimly nods and dismissively says that Heidi has already apologized about Sex Tape-Gate, and that she forgave her for that long ago. She asks Holly if Heidi has a single friend in the world (not counting Spencer), and Holly replies, "She has me" [in other words: no]. Lauren says she'd looooove it if everything were once again fine between herself and Heidi - but she can't bring herself to be civil to Spencer, aka the person Heidi is surgically attached to every minute of every day. Holly chews on that for a few seconds and asks her if the Chucky doll look-alike is the only thing standing in the way of her and Heidi reconciling, and Lauren confirms that he pretty much is. While sunning themselves by the pool, Audrina tells Lauren she's dunzo with Colin, not least 'cause the dullard was barely able to take her mind off of Justin for even one episode...and then she and Lauren agree that it's kinda weird how Justin doesn't seem to care if she dates other guys. Lauren changes the subject to the letter she just received from Heidi...and adds that, while she's greatly enjoying hanging out with Holly, she's annoyed that Holly always has Heidi on her mind and is constantly hinting about how awesome it'd be if they became The Three Musketeers again. Audrina asks her if she'd be friends with Heidi if Spencer were out of the picture, and Lauren says she prolly would, then throws out this existential-style nugget: "Where do you think we'd all be if Heidi never met Spencer?" Audrina says that since he changed the way so many people's lives are being portrayed on The Hills, circumstances would, no doubt, be very different had he not become a semi-regular cast member by virtue of hooking up with Heidi. Audrina and Justin arrive at Libertine, and I notice that he's now being tagged by the producers as Audrina's boyfriend, which is both interesting and perplexing. He generically asks her whassup, so she brings up her date with Colin...and when he stares back at her blankly and grunts, "The what?", she informs him that she went to dinner with Colin, aka a polite, generally decent guy. Justin sourly mumbles, "You got a winner, dude", then cackles about how Colin and his politeness clearly didn't get very far with her. Audrina, who for whatever reason can't seem to let the topic go, points out that he dates other women, to which he retorts, "Can I do that? Would that make you mad?" He asks her how much thought she put into her dates with Colin, calls her a heartbreaker, and nonsensically muses, "There's ways to go about things: maturely, and maybe immaturely sometimes." Audrina points out that things eventually change [and fingers crossed she's referring to her inexplicably slavish devotion to him despite his general attitude of indifference towards her], to which he cacklingly replies, "Not for looooooong!" Ugh, Audrina. Ugh! Over at Casa Pratt/Montag, Holly tells Heidi that Lauren definitely misses her and is sad that they can no longer be friends - then abruptly stops talking when a vexed looking Spencer stumbles into the living room. When Heidi confesses to penning Lauren an apology letter, Spencer whines about how she's been keeping secrets from him ever since Holly came to town. Holly argues that it's not Heidi's fault if she feels as though she can't talk to him, and he hisses, "Who's talking to you?" ... and when Holly sassily replies, "I'm her family", he puts his finger to his lips as a command to shush, a gesture which prompts a faux incredulous Heidi to blurt out, "Spencer!" Holly throws all caution to the wind and tells Heidi that Lauren would be totes open to resuming their friendship if Spencer weren't in the picture, and Spencer chortles with delight that he's the reason for the irreconcilable rift, calling it "a win win". Holly tells Heidi there's still a chance for the friendship with her former BFF to be salvaged, then glares in Spencer's direction as she adds, "And especially since it doesn't involve you, it sounds like a great option." Spencer just kind of rolls his eyes as he wearily mutters, "Let go, my dear. Let go", then stumbles back to the bedroom from whence he came, leaving a seemingly distressed looking Heidi staring contemplatively into space. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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THE HILLS HOMEPAGESeason 1 Recapper: Isabel K. French
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