Recap: During a morning bed canoodle, Susan laments to Billy that she feels terrible about how badly things went with Alison at last night's D&D party and hates having to choose between the two of them. Billy points out that Alison (and her burgeoning drinking problem) didn't give her much of an option, reminds her that he and Alison split up before they hooked up, and assures her that Alison will eventually get over it. A few seconds later, they hear a loud clanging noise outside their door...and when they investigate, they find Alison dropping each of Susan's pots and pans (that she forgot to pack in her haste to move out) at Billy's doorstep and snarking about them shacking up together. Susan needlessly explains that she had nowhere else to go on such short notice and that her stay at Billy's apartment is just a temporary living situation. Jo stops by Shooters to ask Jake if he would please be a character witness for her during tomorrow's custody hearing, and Jake says he'd be happy to help in any way he can...and assures her that together with the Melrose Place gang, they'll "kick some Carter butt". Over at D&D, Bruce is holding a staff meeting about tonight's promotion party for KDJ Radio, aka one of their biggest clients. After the meeting adjourns, Amanda pulls Bruce aside and asks him if she could skip this one, but he insists that the party is going to need a lot of upper level representation. After Bruce ambles off, Alison tells Amanda she can take Susan's name off of her lease (even though she was never on it) 'cause she's living with Billy now. When Alison exits the conference room, Amanda somehow acts surprised to hear that Billy is dating Susan, and that she's taken up residence inside his apartment. She judge-ily snarks, "That's not dating, Billy. That's rebound roulette." [I get the strong sense the writers completely forgot that just two episodes ago Amanda was so visibly giddy at the prospect of Billy hooking up with Susan that she urged him to invite her along on a double date with herself and Peter at the Hollywood Bowl Mozart concert.] Michael runs into Matt at the hospital and asks whassup with the long face, so Matt confides that his resurfaced boyfriend Jeffrey had to retire from the military 'cause he's HIV positive. Michael clucks sympathetically, but then recommends that he run far and fast from that relationship 'cause he's only setting himself up for heartbreak. Kimberly arrives at the Medical Center for an appointment with her gynaecologist and is surprised to see Jo in the waiting room. Jo tells her she's feeling much better after her recent health scare, so Kimberly redirects the conversation to her good news: she and Michael got married in a quickie Vegas ceremony, want to start a family asap, and she thinks it's possible she's pregnant already. Jeffrey repeatedly tries to call Matt - but Matt doesn't pick up the phone and just stares contemplatively at his answering machine as Jeffrey leaves a rambling message about how he hopes he's not deliberately avoiding him. At the D&D client party, Amanda is schmoozing with the client - until Bruce interrupts, gives himself full credit for D&D's most recent campaign, and ushers the client away. Amanda complains to Peter (who has once again tagged along as her plus one) that Bruce never thinks to give her credit for her substantial contributions, and Peter assures her it won't be long before they find a way to oust Bruce and take control of D&D. Alison is guzzling a drink while glaring over at Billy and Susan, who are happily dancing together. She ambles over to the bar, where she encounters a stylishly disheveled looking man with striking blue eyes who flirtily introduces himself as Zack Phillips. He remarks on her ability to handle an overabundance of liquor and invites him to join him and his sleazy posse at their table, and she looks intrigued by the prospect. Kimberly returns home that evening in a sour mood. Michael tells her he figured her gynaecological appointment didn't go well when she didn't get in touch with him all day, then breezily says it's clearly not their time to procreate, not least 'cause they're both so focused on their careers. Kimberly announces that she's going to bed...and when Michael follows her to the bedroom, she tells him that because she was so horribly injured in the drunk driving accident that he caused, she isn't able to get pregnant. She then laughs maniacally and says that the crash wasn't exactly an accident, adding, "You killed any chance I had to have a baby." As Michael half-heartedly tries to comfort her, she snappishly orders him to get out.
Back at party central, a very drunk Alison is hanging with Zack and his friends, loudly cackling at their jokes. After a few seconds of that, Zack invites Alison to the Roxy with him to see a band, and she tells him she definitely likes the sound of that idea. Billy, who's been watching the spectacle with Susan, follows Alison outside to make sure she's not getting behind the wheel. He chides her for once again making a drunken arse of herself at a work event, and she snarks at him to leave her alone - just as Zack appears to escort her over to his limousine. Inside the club, meanwhile, Bruce looks somewhat comical as he energetically jigs to the music - but he's looking very sweaty and nauseated...and a few seconds later, suffers sudden chest pains and collapses. Peter rushes over to medically attend to him and yells for anyone to call 911. Alison and Zack stand on the limo seats and poke themselves through the sunroof as the driver ferries them to the Roxy. Alison says she's soooooo sick of being pigeon-holed as the "good girl" and is thrilled to finally cut loose in this sloshed fashion. Zack says he definitely likes this party girl aspect of her personality and gives her an amorous smooch. The next day at D&D, Billy fills Alison in on Bruce's collapse at the party...and a few seconds later, Amanda wanders over and informs them that since she's going to be busy handling Bruce's accounts, she needs them to call a truce and work together harmoniously. She declines to reveal what is actually ailing Bruce, pointing out that D&D has a lot on the line when it comes to Bruce's robustness as Chief Executive...and instructs Alison and Billy to simply tell clients that Bruce is expected back in the office next week. Over at the design studio, Chris tells Jane that the check for her fabric purchase just bounced, so Jane snarkishly retorts that she's still short the 500K his company promised to float her for production costs. Chris mumbles something about how international fund transfers take time, tries to placate her with kisses, and proposes he loan her the cash so that her current shortage doesn't ruin her credit rating. He slyly adds that if his name were included on the account, she wouldn't have to go through the trouble of going to the bank and signing off on every check, and Jane ignores that giant red flag and says she rather likes the idea of him handling her company's check books. At the courthouse, Ma Carter takes the stand and testifies about how she and her saintly husband are active in their community, and have a lovely home and lots of money. She adds that since they're both retired they're able to fully focus on giving their grandchild a good, wholesome upbringing. When Jo's lawyer refrains from cross-examining her, Jo goes ballistic...and during a short recess screams at him for botching her case. He patiently explains that they only have to prove that she's a fit mother (via her testimony and various character witnesses), not that the Carters are monsters. Even though it should definitely be pointed out that this smugly sanctimonious couple raised a boy who became a drug dealing, murderous monster. Matt decides to meet up with Jeffrey for lunch, admits that he's still adjusting to the HIV news, and isn't sure what he wants. He adds that he's not certain he's able to make a commitment to someone who has such a major health challenge ahead of him and needs time to mull it over. Jeffrey irritably snaps, "Time is up" and that a relationship with him is obviously more than he can handle. He bitterly adds, "Have a nice life", then gets up and beats a hasty retreat. At Melrose Place, Amanda is in bed with Peter, happily mulling over the [seemingly implausible] idea of the two of them taking over D&D. Peter concurs and says that Bruce's bad luck is their good fortune, and that it's an ideal time for a takeover. When Amanda worries that it's unsportsmanlike to take advantage of Bruce's current health crisis, Peter says he'd no doubt do the same to her, then calls the two of them "a team" and gives her a smooch. He gleefully pronounces, "Game's about to begin, Amanda. Ready to play?" and smooches her some more. The next day at the courthouse, the Carters' lawyer is able to cast an unflattering light onto each of Jo's character witnesses:
Later, Jo takes the stand and recounts how Reed unwittingly impregnated her, kidnapped her, and threatened to kill her once she discovered what a deranged criminal he was. But despite all of that trauma, she chose to keep the baby and has been steeling herself to become the best gosh darn mom she can possibly be. She then tears up and wails about how the court can't, in good conscience, take a newborn baby away from its mother...and pretends to have zero regrets about telling the Carters that the spawn was fathered by their unhinged son. She [somewhat unconvincingly] insists that she truly wants to include the Carters in her family unit, and still has hope that such a thing is possible.
During the next recess, Alison tells Jo she can't wait to get on that stand first thing tomorrow morning and say glowing things about her, and Jo looks touched and thanks the entire Melrose Place gang for standing by her. Jo then pulls Alison aside and asks her if she's OK with her being formally named as the baby's (backup) legal guardian/godmother, and Alison says she'd be honored. Back at the beach house, Kimberly is staring out at the ocean when Michael returns home and grumbles about how the check he just got from Jane Mancini Designs has Chris's name on it, even though he's not a partner. Kimberly makes it clear she doesn't give even the tiniest of rat's asses 'bout that and wails about how desperate she is to become a mother. She demands that he help her and decrees, "Give me what I most want in life! Give me a baby!" and collapses into his arms. While dining out that evening, Zack tells Alison that he earns a living by entertaining out-of-town artists and band members. He then invites her to go dancing after dinner - but she declines and says she has to get up early 'cause she's expected in court at 9:00am. Hours later, an inebriated Alison and Zack stumble into the Melrose Place courtyard...and he looks impressed by the dump as he glances over at the pool and says he'd really really like to go swimming. As she loudly giggles at the prospect, the two strip off their clothes and dive in - but cause such a ruckus that everyone in the complex is awakened by their laughing and splashing. A vexed Amanda marches down to the pool with a couple of towels and orders the two to get out, snarling at Alison that "being a tenant doesn't entitle you to public drunkenness". Alison and Zack spend the rest of the night on the beach (near where Zack lives), and by the time they wake up, it's already 8:30am. Alison panics and says there's no way she has time to go home and change into something more court-appropriate, so then Zack pulls out a bottle of pills and urges her to take one, describing it as nothing more than "a jolt of caffeine". Alison's like 'what could possibly go wrong with accepting pills from a guy I hardly know?' and stupidly opts to take two of the pills. Over at the courthouse, everyone is waiting for Alison to show up, and she stumbles into the courtroom looking harried, buzzed, and underdressed in her tiny slip of a party frock. She fibs and says she's late 'cause of an accident on the freeway...and Jo's lawyer requests a brief recess and tells Jo that no way in hell can they put Alison on the witness stand in her current state. When Alison widens her eyes dementedly and insists that she's totes fine, Jake glares back at her in disgust and growls, "Alison, you're as high as a kite." An incredulous Jo asks her how she could do this, then rails about how she had trusted her to do this one important favor.
While strolling near the beach, Jeffrey tells Matt he doesn't want to be judged for his HIV status, but also knows that Matt must have sooooo many questions (e.g. Will I be safe? How long will the Melrose Place writers be willing to devote a storyline to a gay couple confronting AIDS?) Jeffrey commiserates about how sad and disappointed he is that no one wants to come close to him anymore. Matt assures him he's not alone, is now certain he wants to be in a relationship with him - but needs a firm commitment...and Jeffrey happily says, "I'll take it!" and the two embrace. Amanda is visiting Bruce in the hospital, assuring him that their clients are buying the food poisoning story...and Bruce nods approvingly and says he definitely wants everyone to keep a lid on his heart problems. Amanda urges him to relax and let her take care of business, and he contritely says he doesn't know what he'd do without her and that he's counting on her to hold down the fort. Amanda tells Bruce to take care, then heads straight over to Peter's office and closes the door. When she tells him that Bruce seems nervous, Peter's like, "He should be" and reminds her she has a phone call to make. Amanda dutifully picks up the phone and calls a major client (John Lane) to inform him that Bruce suffered a heart attack, isn't recovering as quickly as they hoped, and is unlikely to ever be the same again. She then assures him that, under her competent supervision, his advertising campaign will proceed as scheduled...and, on the other end of the line, John Lane seems happy enough with that. Alison is at Shooters, guzzling booze yet again, when Zack enters the bar. She tells him she didn't make it onto the witness stand, laments that Jo will never forgive her, and that as a result of her drunken idiocy she may have lost her best friend. Zack tells her that real friends don't judge a person's every move, and Alison coos about how supportive he is. He tells her he knows a good thing when he sees it, and leans in for a kiss. Over at the courthouse, the judge says he's prepared to make a ruling that's based on the best interest of Jo's spawn...and ultimately awards full custody to the Carters. A devastated Jo screeches, "Nooooooo!! I won't let you have my baby!!" as her lawyer and Jake do their best to restrain her. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
1 Comment
Jennifer
9/26/2024 12:03:11 am
I'm so glad you're doing these! I'm currently rewatching Melrose Place and your 90210 ones cracked me up! 🤣 Leave a Reply. |
MELROSE PLACE HOMEPAGE
Recapper: Isabel K. French 
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