Recap: Heidi enters the living room and tells Lauren she slept in her room last night after getting into a fight with Spencer 'cause she declined his offer to move in with him. Lauren agrees that it's much too soon for them to be moving in together, reminds her that at the start of their unholy coupling she declared she wouldn't be willing to move in together until they'd dated at least two years, and asks if she really wants to change what she believes in just 'cause a Chucky doll lookalike is trying to manipulate her into doing what he wants her to do. She then throws in the towel on the friendship and urges Heidi to do whatever she wants and to not use her as an excuse to continue being her roommate [in name only] by pointing out, "You don't even live with me. I live with your stuff."
Whitney arrives at Teen Vogue headquarters in New York and is greeted by Emily, who escorts her to Amy Astley's office for her job interview.
At Bolthouse Productions, Elodie tells Heidi what a douchecanoe Spencer is for relentlessly pressuring her to move in with him, not least 'cause of all the dickishness he's pulled on her this season...and adds that it's a mystery why in the fuckity fuck she's still with the moron man-child. Heidi says she's pretty sure that technically they're broken up right now...and that while most of her wants to move in with him, the tiny sensible part of her can't help wondering what the rush is. Kristen tells her she's lived with almost every boyfriend she's ever had and that it's not always a good thing. This prompts Heidi to wonder aloud how she'll ever know if it's a good/bad decision if she doesn't take a leap of faith, but Elodie and Kristen just shake their heads and make it clear what a horrible idea they both think it is.
Amy Astley tells Whitney they're looking to staff the magazine with special people who somehow can predict what's happening in the L.A. fashion scene before it happens. After that, she asks Whitney to name some of her favorite photographers and designers, and Whitney rattles off a list of names, then gushes that she looooooves fashion so much she totes wants to make a career of it.
Spencer calls Heidi at Bolthouse to tell her he has a surprise for her, then texts her an address he wants her to meet him at. As she rushes out, Elodie and Kristen roll their eyes and shake their heads at each other in dismay.
Spencer is sitting on the front steps of an apartment building when Heidi pulls up in her Audi convertible. The two hug hello before he steers her inside to show her a vacant apartment he just rented so the two of them can shack up together. Heidi reminds him he rudely kicked her out of his car at the end of the previous episode, and he explains that he's been soooooo frustrated about her continual refusal to make the decision he wants her to make. He then gives her the grand tour of the apartment, including the balcony that offers an impressive view of all their favorite Hollywood haunts. Heidi asks him if he's absolutely sure he's ready to settle down and be a serious boyfriend (e.g. there can be no more playmates), and Spencer nods and says, "Deal." Heidi mulls that over for a few seconds before saying, "Let's do it. Let's move in", and the two hug happily.
Heidi returns to Hillside Villas to report to Lauren that she's decided to give in to the mounting pressure Spencer's been putting on her to move in with him, and an unfazed Lauren's all, "OK, whatevs. Let me know when you're leaving so I can find a new roommate." Heidi excitedly tells her about the beautiful new digs Spencer got for them, and Lauren smirkingly retorts, "What could go wrong?" and half-heartedly congratulates her before heading off to Teen Vogue.
Over at Casa Dipshit, Brody teases Spencer about his near married status - but Spencer's all 'whoa' and points out that marriage entails buying a ring, which he's definitely not doing [until Season 3]. He says his main goal is to break up the Heidi/Lauren Roommate Bond 'cause of what a horse's ass Lauren [understandably] thinks he is...and when Brody asks if this means he won't be partying with the guys anymore, Spencer chuckles about having a 'homeboy phone' separate from his 'girlfriend phone' so he can continue to hit the clubs hassle-free. He mumblingly pronounces in that weird way he talks without moving his lips, "I was born to play, dawg, that's what I do" - OMFG - and Brody chortles at Playboy Spence and predicts that his wild-oat-sowing playboy ways are going to push him outa his new love nest soooo fast.
Lauren phones Whitney in New York to tell her that Heidi is moving in with Spencer. Whitney's all, "Wha-a-a-a?" and says they'll have to discuss the matter in greater detail once she returns to L.A. tomorrow morning.
Lauren returns home to find Heidi packing up her stuff. When Heidi announces she's moving out today, a startled Lauren's all, "Wuh? Today?" ... and Heidi's all, "Um, d'yuh" and says she really wants to put in the effort to maintain their friendship by getting together a lot, e.g. tacos every Tuesday. Lauren just kind of shrugs and points out that she's pretty much been MIA from their friendship this entire season, to which Heidi says she doesn't want this to be the end for them. Lauren replies, "It might be though, Heidi" and says it's nice she's going to live with someone she loves...but since he's such a ginormous fucktwat, she really shouldn't expect to be able to have both of them in her life.
After Spencer finishes loading Heidi's stuff into the moving truck, Lauren tells Heidi she can always come back from the dark side if things don't work out. The two then hug and exchange I love yous before Heidi climbs into the passenger seat of the truck. Spencer remarks on her serious aura and assures her she won't regret this decision...and a glum Heidi mutely gazes at Lauren via the rearview mirror as the truck slowly pulls away from Hillside Villas.
At Bolthouse Productions, Heidi tells Elodie she's thrown all good sense to the wind and moved in with Spencer. Elodie stares at her incredulously before exclaiming, "After all of my grown up advice to you?!" Heidi happily gabbles that she's cooking dinner for her beloved tonight...after she buys some pots, pans, and dishware. Elodie ambles back to her workstation, shaking her head in utter disbelief.
Lauren returns home to celebrate the arrival of her new roommate - Audrina! - with pizza and a bottle of exploding champagne.
Over at Casa Dumbfuck, Spencer tells Heidi he's still a bit irked that it took her so long to agree to move in with him...and Heidi tells him he should be grateful she did, given that she disregarded her policy of implementing a two year waiting period before cohabitation. She warns, "Don't make me regret this", and he just stares back at her blankly...and as the camera pans out, Heidi stares vacantly into space as a bored looking Spencer starts fiddling with his cell phone.
Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
11/4/2021 07:56:58 pm
I’ve loved reading your recaps! Do you think you will do the rest of the show?
Isabel K. French
12/20/2021 08:32:28 am
11/7/2022 05:47:51 pm
When?! When?! I wanna start rewatching these!
Isabel K. French
11/9/2022 01:46:32 pm
Season 3 is coming soon to a computer or mobile device near you! LOL..
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Recapper: Isabel K. French
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Television of Yore
Snide recaps of television's most entertaining classics