Recap: Chris Williams arrives at OSI headquarters with a rose clutched in his hand - and even though we haven't seen him for the last five episodes, during which time Jaime was cavorting/flirting with various other men - it looks as if he's suddenly her main squeeze again. He runs into Sarah (last seen in The Antidote episode) and asks her if Jaime is around, and she tells him that Jaime went out on assignment this morning, then hands him a file containing all the details. Chris looks it over, contorts his face into a miffed expression, and says he was supposed to be meeting Jaime for lunch. He goes into Oscar's office to ask whaddup with him giving Jaime a BS babysitting gig, so Oscar explains that the young girl Jaime has been assigned to watch over is the daughter of a top notch scientist who just defected from his unnamed Asian country, and the OSI is worried that his enemies will try to blackmail him into returning by getting to his family. Chris points out that any OSI flunky could have handled such a low level task, and Oscar's like, "Well, d'yuh", but points out that Jaime is happiest when she's around children...but then puts his most solemn face on and says he's noticed that Jaime has been acting "edgy" lately. Jaime and her babysittee, Reiko (the same child actress who played Kim in the Beyond the Call episode) are at the zoo, staring at polar bears and discussing whether or not animals who live in zoo enclosures can be truly happy. When a man selling balloons comes over, Jaime offers to buy one for Reiko...but after she pays the fifty cents and he's in the process of handing the balloon over, he "accidentally" lets go of the entire bundle and is all, "Oh no!" as it flies away. He says he can inflate more, but that he could really use a child assistant, and Jaime decides 'why not let the girl I'm supposed to be bodyguarding from her father's political enemies just wander off with a strange man?' She then sits on a bench, daydreaming and staring longingly at a toddler, until she hears Reiko suddenly shriek, "Please help me!" Jaime springs up, spots the balloon man stuffing Reiko into a steel box in the back of his truck, and picks up some kind of cartoon statue thing and hurls it at the vehicle. After it smashes through the truck's engine, Jaime runs over, bionically lifts and tosses the balloon man and his accomplice into an aquatic animal enclosure, and rescues Reiko from the steel box. The two hug - but things immediately get awkward when Reiko sees part of Jaime's plastic arm skin ripped away, exposing her bionic wires. She wigs out and cries, "What is that?! What are you?" then runs over to a police officer...and Jaime stares after her in total mortification.
Over at the OSI lab, Rudy does a quick repair of Jaime’s damaged forearm, but it doesn't seem to do much to improve her mood. A day later, Jaime arranges to meet up with Reiko to see how she's doing after her big freakout and give her a matching set of stuffed polar bears. Reiko assures her she's over the shock of seeing her exposed arm wires, then asks Jaime if she's "like this" all over. Jaime breezily replies that she's only bionic in one arm and both her legs, then emphasizes that it has nothing to do with the person she is inside. Reiko's all, "Uh huh, whatever", then introduces Jaime to her father as "the robot lady". Jaime shoots her a look of horror, then excuses herself and grabs the stuffed polar bears she was about to give to Reiko - haha! suck on that, you rude little turd - and rushes out to her car. That evening, Jaime changes into her red snuggie to lounge in front of the fireplace and write a long resignation letter to Oscar. She unburdens herself about how sick to the teeth she is of all the spying and espionage she's been forced to combat for three seasons, and desperately wants to get back to reality...and she also reminds Oscar that she didn't so much enlist herself as she was drafted by the OSI not long after her grisly parachuting accident during her first appearance on The Six Million Dollar Man. She concludes the letter by stating how tired she is of being an OSI slave...and that even though she'll miss them all very much, her mind is firmly made up. The next morning, Jaime arrives at OSI headquarters, looking solemn and dazed as she ambles over to Oscar's office. She hands him the resignation letter, brusquely says, "Bye", and exits the room...leaving Oscar staring after her in shocked bewilderment.
Sarah calls Jaime the next morning, and Jaime tells her she feels awesome and freeeeee, and that she's so happy to be away from government employment for the foreseeable future. Sarah invites her to lunch tomorrow, then says she has a call on another line from Senator Renshaw. Uh oh. Somewhere inside the State Department, Senator Renshaw and Deputy Director Bill Parr are in a closed door meeting with Oscar to discuss the conundrum they're facing at the hands of Janie Sommers, who Renshaw describes as "a walking library of their secrets" ... not to mention a blabby mouthpiece about her status as a bionic government spy. He points out the national security perils they could all face if a foreign enemy were to kidnap her and probe the science of her bionic limbs, then admonishes Oscar for just allowing her to walk away from the OSI. Oscar argues that he and Jaime have developed an unspoken bond of trust over the show's three season run, that she's risked her life in pretty much every episode in service of the OSI, and has proven herself to be loyal, trustworthy, and reliable. Bill Parr holds up a file folder and says it contains intel of Jaime's last assignment, namely the profile of a top notch scientist who was, until recently, considered by the government of his native country to also be loyal, trustworthy, and reliable - until he defected to the U.S. That's comparing apples to oranges, but OK. Senator Renshaw insists that Jaime cannot be permitted to resign from the OSI and leave herself vulnerable to potential enemy kidnappers, and Bill Parr concurs and proposes a solution: force Jaime to live in a community that's under government control so she can't be kidnapped and probed. Oscar angrily says that that translates to imprisoning her - but Senator Renshaw disagrees, then says he's decided to leave The Janie Sommers Matter in creepy Bill Parr's hands. Oscar declares that he'll do everything in his power to stop this, then grits his teeth and snarks, "Her name is Jaime, not Janie. Get it right and don't forget it!"
Oscar drops by Jaime's apartment to say hey to her and Max, and warn her that the powers that be who oversee the OSI (aka the NSB) are refusing to let her peacefully resign. When Jaime's all, "Wha-a-a?", he explains that because she's a government subsidized cyborg, they want her to retire in a state controlled community, where she'll have everything she needs - except, of course, her freedom. Oscar says it's out of his hands...and since the NSB is on their way over, she has about twenty minutes to pack, go on the run, and use all the fancy spy skills her taught her to keep herself hidden. He says he'll miss her a lot, thinks of her as family, but wants her to be free so she can find whatever she's looking for. He croaks, "I love you", and Jaime tears up, returns his I love you, and says the thing she's looking for is "whatever's left of Jaime Sommers". Oscar's like, "Good luck with that!" and beats a hasty retreat with Max. Jaime weeps for a few seconds, then glares at herself in the mirror and calls herself "an awful machine". She gets so distressed that she bionically smashes the mirror with her fist, wails, "Whyyyyyyy is this happppppening?" then quickly pulls herself together so she can escape before the feds show up. After the commercial break, the NSB feds arrive at the Austin ranch and agree that they want Jaime's forcible retirement in a gated community-prison conducted smoothly...and are willing to tranquilize her if she puts up any resistance. When they see that her apartment is empty, Bill Parr radios his subordinates to put the word out that Jaime Sommers is a fugitive, and that every NSB agent officially has license to do whatever it takes to locate her. In the meantime, the NSB proceeds to cut off all communication with the OSI...prompting Rudy to complain to Oscar about how Bill Parr is using Jaime's escape as a political trick to usurp the OSI, which apparently he's been wanting to do for years. Chris scrunches his face concernedly and says he's worried about Jaime 'cause he knows the NSB will never give up searching for her - but Sarah insists that if Jaime doesn't want to be found, she won't be found. As Chris mulls over Sarah's words, he has a flashback of when he and Jaime once vacationed at a romantic cabin hideaway in the snowy mountains... As the two frolic on a snow-covered hilltop, Jaime coos about how awesome it is that no one in the OSI has any clue where they are right now, and that this mountain cabin is their own little secret. Chris snaps out of his reverie and blabs to Sarah, "I know where she is!" Rudy warns him not to make a move, 'cause he could lead the NSB, whose agents are surely monitoring him, directly to where Jaime's hiding. Chris assures him he has a foolproof plan that involves a jeep. Chris heads off in his car, which is being tailed by NSB agents on the road and in a chopper above. He enters a tunnel, switches vehicles by jumping into the jeep Sarah drove over in, then speeds off. The feds stupidly continue to chase Chris' car - but when they see that a woman is now in the driver's seat, they realize they've been duped. Sarah gives them a "fuck you" air kiss, chuckles, and drives off. Jaime is chopping wood at the romantic cabin hideaway when she hears Chris' jeep, panics, and bionically jogs into the woods. Chris sees smoke coming out of the chimney, sees Jaime racing away, and hops onto a snowmobile to chase her down. He yells, "Stop! It's me, Chrisssssss!" and Jaime's all, "Wuh?" and is so startled by the sight of him that she falls down a steep hill and rolls all the way to the bottom. Fortunately, she doesn't crash into a tree, and looks unharmed when Chris runs over to cradle her in his arms. That evening, Jaime and Chris sit by the fire and talk about her predicament. Chris urges her to stop running and surrender to the NSB, but Jaime argues that she'd prefer to not live like a zoo animal, and insists that she can evade capture by the NSB indefinitely. She concedes that Rudy Wells saved her life after the grisly parachuting accident, and in exchange agreed to the odd mission here and there...but once the spin-off really got rolling, here and there became nearly getting killed in every episode, and the wretched missions Oscar gave her every week started taking over her whole life. Plus, she's really starting to hate being a cyborg. Chris says he doesn't care about her internal wiring 'cause he finds her desirable regardless, and offers to live in "the zoo" with her 'cause of how much he loves her. Jaime's like, "Meh.." and says she has to work this out alone...then puts on her coat, heads to the door, and warns, "Don't follow me."
At daybreak, Jaime is ambling along with the road, with no better idea than to hitchhike and get into cars with strange man. When she and her hitchhikee reach Arizona, she wakes up from a nap in time to overhear him talking to police on a nearby pay phone, telling them he has fugitive Jaime Sommers in his car. She glances over at the newspaper he left in the driver's seat and sees her mug splashed across the front page, with an article stating that she's wanted for armed robbery. Jaime's all, "Ack!", hastily exits the car, and bionically races off. Jaime makes her way to a zoo park and stares dully at the caged polar bears, then glances over at the carousel and gets nauseous during a flashback of the tragic incident that sparked this three year spin-off: that blasted parachuting accident. The feds arrive at the zoo park, announce to each other that they're going in on foot, and that they have ten acres of park to cover in their search for Jaime Sommers. Jaime encounters a little boy named Tommy who wants to play ball with her 'cause his blind dad can't play with him anymore. Jaime points out that he's still his dad, and that the most important thing is not his imperfections, but the man he is inside. She looks startled by her own words of wisdom and urges Tommy to run back over to where his dad is standing and stop getting hung up on his blindness...and he's like, "Can do!" and scampers across the park to where his poor blind dad has been forlornly standing. The feds, meanwhile, spot Jaime and close in on her, and she stands frozen in place, looking defeated. In the next scene, Jaime is in a meeting with Oscar and Senator Renshaw, telling them she's returning to the OSI under duress, given that the asshole powers-that-be are dickishly refusing to release their death-grip on her. That said, she insists on a better work-life balance so she can get a healthier perspective on life...and she no longer wants every mission to involve espionage, disabling nuclear bombs, or battling fembots. As Oscar winces at her candor, Senator Renshaw deems her conditions to be "not unreasonable", remarks on how often senator fucktards such as himself lose perspective on what life is all about, and welcomes her back into the fold. Oscar thanks the old crony for being so accommodating, and handshakes are dispensed all around.
Chris is waiting outside the meeting room with Max (yay!), and apologizes to Jaime for trying to dictate how she should live her life. She assures him it's all good, and that she'd be interested in working things out with him - until she gets back with Steve in the made-for-TV movie, Bionic Ever After? He's all, "Hurray!" and the two hug it out while Max wags his tail approvingly. Woof! Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
1 Comment
Amina
5/10/2019 01:54:37 am
Bionic Ever After?- YAY!!! Leave a Reply. |
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