Recap: Peter Brady from The Brady Bunch fame is playing with Max in his backyard...and by playing, I mean he's losing a tug-of-war match with the bionic dog. Peter then decides it would be fun to tie the rope to a steel post, give the other end to Max and watch what happens with that...and as anyone could predict, Max bionically pulls the rope hard enough to uproot the steel post, then drags it around and proceeds to make a giant mess of the yard. While that's happening, a white van labelled Department of Animal Regulations cruises by, and one of the men inside snaps photographs of Max bionically pulling on the rope. He cackles to the other man in the van about all the money they're going to make from the bionic dog. Eeeeek! Oscar, Russ, and a top bionic scientist named Valerie Breuer - who's sporting a rockin' Dorothy Hamill mushroom 'do - visit Jaime while she's laid up in the hospital, 'cause apparently Rudy is performing a total re-jiggering of her bionic limbs. Jaime asks how Max is doing, and Oscar tells her they've implanted him with a transmitter that can monitor his vitals and track his location as long as he's within a certain range. Jaime moans, "I miss Maaaax.." but Valerie assures her he's having a great time with her nephew, Peter Brady, and that the two are inseparable. When Valerie arrives home, Max hides in some nearby bushes to avoid an inevitable scolding for all the damage he just caused in the backyard. Peter Brady sheepishly tells his aunt that he and Max were just playing, and Valerie sternly reminds him that he's not supposed to let Max use his bionics when he's outside...then snarkishly adds that he's an expensive government asset, not the family pet. Valerie goes inside and taps on the keyboard of her giant home computer...then looks wistfully at a photograph of her brother and his son, both of whom died in a recent plane crash, and tears up. She tells Peter that if they had had a homing device planted inside of them (like Max now has), she would have been able to locate the crash site sooner. She then shakes off her feelings of grief and asks her nephew if he could please take Max for a short walk, preferably close to home so that his homing device doesn't go beyond its 5 km tracking range. Peter Brady scampers down the street with an unleashed Max, who's so excited by being taken out for a walk that he races off at top bionic speed. Valerie gets irked when she notices that Max's homing device is now beyond the 5 km range. Max comes to a stop, just as the Department of Animal Regulations van cruises by. One of the men inside uses an electronic contraption to jam the signal for Max's homing device, then steps outside of the van and asks Peter why his dog isn't on a leash. Peter says it broke...and while that's happening, two men quietly exit the back door of the van, pull out an Aqua Net spray can, and spritz knockout gas at Max. (I wonder if it's the same stuff the fembots were using on their victims.) Max is all, "Woof..?" and promptly collapses...and once he's fully unconscious, the men pick him up and load him into the back of the van. Valerie quickly realizes that Max's homing device is being jammed - just as the faux dog-catcher is writing up a ticket to Peter Brady for failing to leash his dog. As the van speeds off, Peter calls for Max...then stares perplexedly into space when there's no sign of him. Valerie alerts Oscar that Max is missing, and he rushes over pronto so he can watch Valerie tap on her computer's keyboard in a frantic effort to locate the dog...and get frustrated when the computer continues to go haywire because of the jamming. She exclaims, "Something is very wrong!" and says this reminds her of when her brother's plane went down. Peter Brady, who's been sheepishly eavesdropping on the conversation, enters the room and apologizes for losing track of Max...as well he should, the careless idiot. He tells his aunt and Oscar that around the time Max disappeared he was issued a ticket by someone from the Department of Animal Regulations, and Oscar puts his most solemn face on and calls Russ to report that Max may have been kidnapped, and that it was probably a professional job. He passes along Peter Brady's description of the white van and orders Russ to alert the authorities to keep an eye out for it. Max is imprisoned inside a steel kennel inside a makeshift lab inside what looks to be an abandoned train station. The two dog-nappers enter the lab and ask how the testing is going, and a man in a long white lab coat (Dr. Sanders) says in his heavy German accent that he can't run tests on a dog who refuses to cooperate...and who could tear him to bloody pieces with his bionic jaw. He tells them that Valerie Breuer is an expert in dog bionics and has had a long-standing relationship with the OSI...then cackles and says, "It vill kill two birds vith vun stone." One of the dog-nappers reminds him that they only have forty-eight hours to deliver Max's bionic data to their "Eastern customer", and Dr. Sanders mulls that over and smirkingly says, "Surely he vill pervorm vor Valerie." Back at the hospital, Jaime tells Russ she's soooo frustrated that the writers are giving her such little airtime in this Max-centric episode, and Russ urges her to chillax while Rudy gets her bionic limbs back to proper working order. Valerie's computer is still buzzing uselessly, so she tells Peter Brady that perhaps an OSI computer might help her "generate with more variables". She tells him she's off to OSI headquarters. Dr. Sanders tells Max that as long as he's located within fifty feet of their jamming device, no one will be able to track him...and Max nods as he thoughtfully absorbs that interesting nugget. The dog-nappers follow Valerie while she's en route to OSI headquarters. They cut her off at an intersection...and one of them pulls a gun on her and forces his way into the driver's seat of her car. Max glares at Dr. Sanders, who puts on a thick glove to place a bowl of food inside his kennel. Max responds by clamping his jaw on his wrist, which causes the doctor to writhe around in pain before passing out...and Max takes the opportunity to bionically break the lock on the kennel door. He then trots over to the door and uses his jaw to turn the doorknob (a trick I see that Rudy was finally successful in teaching him) and exits the lab. Way to go, Max! When Dr. Sanders regains consciousness, he panics at the sight of the empty kennel. He races out of the lab - just as the dog-nappers arrive at the abandoned train station with Valerie. Max is trotting around the building, looking for the nearest exit. He makes his way outside and is alarmed when he sees Valerie being dragged toward the building. When he barks in protest, Valerie urges him to run away [and get help!]. When one of the dog-nappers rushes at him with the Aqua Net spray can, Max wisely backs off and bolts down the street, and the dog-napper hops into his car to chase after him. Peter Brady notices on his aunt's computer that Max's homing device is suddenly working again and that he's located just 5 km from the house. He calls the OSI to report this to Valerie or Oscar, but neither is there to take the call. He decides 'why not be part of the solution for a damn change?' and puts the tracking device into his pocket, hops onto his bicycle, and heads out to find Max. While visiting Jaime in her hospital room, Oscar issues an APB for Valerie, who has just been reported missing. He tells Jaime he also has a new lead on "an underworld character" who might have had something to do with Max's kidnapping. I wonder if it's the Eastern customer (Soviet? East German?) the dog-nappers were referring to earlier. Valerie refuses to give the dog-nappers top secret intel on Max's bionic structure - but quickly changes her mind when the men threaten to kill her idiot nephew. Peter Brady tracks Max to a park and finds him slurping water from a fountain. The two greet each other happily, and Max barks and motions for him to follow...and it takes Peter Brady a lot longer than it should have to grasp that the dog is urgently trying to tell him something. Max leads Peter Brady to the abandoned train station, and the dog-napper who had been chasing after Max in his car sees them arrive at the building and grins gleefully. Peter Brady orders Max to stay put while he goes inside to investigate...and Max whines concernedly at that dumb idea. Valerie is tapping out reports on Max's bionic structure on Dr. Sanders' computer and says it's all the intel she's currently able to provide them with. The men scrunch their faces in disappointment and tell her they're most interested in info on muscle/tissue rejection and bionic surgery, and Valerie explains that those things aren't part of her dog bionic expertise. One of the dog-nappers smacks her around and snarls, "We're through fooling around!" then stalks out of the room...and Peter Brady, who's hiding nearby, overhears him tell someone on the phone about the 100K he and his partners in crime are going to make once they've delivered Max's bionic intel and disposed of the woman scientist. As Peter Brady's all, "Oooh nooo!!" he's spotted and promptly seized by the other dog-napper. The dog-nappers tie Peter Brady and Valerie to chairs with really thick rope and leave them unattended in the lab. Max, meanwhile, has decided to take matters into his own paws and trots inside the building to see whassup. Oscar and a small team of OSI agents arrive at Valerie's house. Oscar goes inside, looks at her computer and perks up when he sees that they now have a location on Max. He races back out to pass along this helpful development to his agents. Max sneaks past the dog-nappers, who are in the middle of plotting how best to dispose of Peter Brady and Valerie. Max enters the lab, much to the relief of Valerie and Peter, and uses his bionic jaw to rip through the thick ropes so they can flee. Dr. Sanders spots them running away and orders the dog-nappers to chase after them. Max leads Peter and Valerie to a back exit and bionically chews through a chain link fence so they can escape - just as Oscar and the OSI cavalry arrive in time to arrest the dog-nappers. Everyone crams themselves into Jaime's hospital room to gabble about the episode's predictably happy ending...and Oscar somehow sneaked Max past hospital security so that Jaime can enjoy a visit with her beloved pooch. She urges Valerie to take some much needed time off work and plan a vacation with her nephew, and Valerie mulls that over and says that after all of the dog-napping drama of the last twenty-four hours, it sounds like a very good idea. Woof! Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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