Recap: Jaime has gathered a few of her brightest students to study the night sky with a series of telescopes. The group discusses stars and celestial navigation...and one cheeky little boy reminds Jaime that she's friends with a famous astronaut who's very good at all this stuff: Colonel Steve Austin. Katie (of the previous, lion-centric episode) asks Jaime if she and Steve are ever going to get married, and Jaime blushes and goes, "I dunno." The group suddenly spots a fiery object flying through the air, and a puzzled Jaime says she can't imagine where it came from. We then hear someone official-sounding call Oscar Goldman to inform him that “an unidentified ballistic missile just came down in the Los Angeles reservoir”. Oscar's all, "Wha-a-a?! Where did it come from?" and the person on the other end is like, "I dunno." Eeeek! Cue the opening credits.. The following morning, Oscar leads a team of military agents to the reservoir to pull the missile out of the water. Steve Austin arrives on the scene and tells Oscar he's been looking into the unauthorized launch, but hasn't yet been able to determine who was responsible. He bionically rips open the control compartment thingy on the warhead to see if he can uncover any clues about the location of the launch...but after looking it over, he grunts disappointedly. He tells Oscar that the radar defense system was mysteriously jammed at the exact time the missile was flying through the air, and Oscar cries, "That's impossible!" but Steve theorizes that this is all the work of an evil genius. Oscar worriedly says that whoever owns this jamming device could drop a nuclear warhead any time they want without warning...and Steve's like, "Well d'yuh" and says they need to locate this sicko, like pronto. Jaime is hanging in her apartment, making a pie for an upcoming bake sale...and to speed things along, she bionically rolls out the dough and rapidly jerks her bionic hand around to whip up the meringue extra fast (which wasn't actually necessary since she's using an electric mixer...but OK). Oscar drops by to discuss the Missile Launch Situation and informs her that Steve is currently stationed at the Military Early Warning Station - otherwise known as MEWS. He tells her that, to date, all the intel they have to go on is an approximate location where the missile was launched...an approximate location which includes a vast estate owned by tycoon JT Connors, CEO of Connors Aerospace Industries. Jaime says she's been good friends with JT ever since he sponsored her first tennis tournament, and Oscar's like, "D'yuh, that's why I'm here." He tells her that JT's company has been frequently contracted by the Air Force to build missiles...much like the one they uncovered in the reservoir. Jaime says she can't imagine JT being involved in anything as nefarious as rogue missile launches, but Oscar argues that he has the capability - plus he's turned into kind of a right-wing kook ever since his son was killed in Vietnam. Jaime says she feels weird about investigating one of her oldest and dearest friends, but Oscar tells her she can't let emotions (or her lack of spy training and intel gathering experience) to get in the way of this mission and reminds her that - damn it! - innocent lives are at stake. Jaime puts her pie in the oven, says of course she doesn't want anyone to get hurt/obliterated, and agrees to look into JT's missile-related activities.
Jaime arrives at JT's gigantic sprawl of a ranch - and the two warmly greet each other and hug. JT introduces her to his chief engineer, Warren Rayker, then orders Warren to fetch Jaime's bags so they can head over to his private study and get caught up. Jaime spots a framed photo of JT's late son and picks it up, and JT gets emotional and says he's still angry about his beloved son dying "like a sitting duck". He starts ranting about the lack of leadership among "government mama's boys", and says he's been locking horns with DC brass for years. He then waves a fist in the air and growls, "One day I'd like to get all the Washington soft-heads in one place and..." and Jaime stares back at him in bewilderment and goes, "And..?" and JT puts a pin in his anti-government crazy-talk and suggests they go look at his train collection...and by train collection he means a collection of, like, actual trains.
JT shows Jaime a remote control that Warren built - a device that controls every electronic thing on the ranch. Jaime tries to sound super casual when she asks him if he happens to have any working models of weapons laying around, and he replies, "Of course not. That would be against the law" - but admits to owning several guns. Warren appears out of nowhere to inform JT that he just finished a systems check on something or other, and JT chuckles and tells Jaime that they're going to "bring the DC turkeys to their knees". Jaime stares at him worriedly. As JT shuttles Jaime around the ranch, she notices a concrete building in the middle of nowhere that's surrounded by chain-link fencing. He warns her that that building is strictly off-limits, then ominously says that not even the Secretary of State has a clue as to what's in there. After broodily glaring into space for a few seconds, he suddenly perks up and says, "Let's go back to the house for some chilli!" LOL. That evening, Jaime sneaks out of the house and bionically runs toward the concrete building - dun dun dun dun dun dun - and leaps over the chain-link fence. She rips the padlock off the door, needlessly whips it into the air, and steps inside a control room that has lots of levers, switches, and flashing buttons. It's exactly what I'd imagine a control room in the '70s would look like. Unfortunately, she must have triggered a security alarm, 'cause back at the house Warren is alerting JT that there's an intruder inside their radar installation building. JT, Warren, and a couple of armed guards jump into a jeep and race toward the building to see whassup. Jaime ambles around the control room and notices some helpful labels on the controls: "radar frequency search" and "high frequency intercept & jam". She shakes her head in dismay and mutters, "Oh JT.." and realizes that Oscar's suspicions about her friend were probably well founded. Suddenly, an alarm starts beeping, and an automated voice orders "the intruder" to stay where she is, warns her that the floor has become weight sensitive, and if she moves she'll be zapped to death. Jaime eyes the nearby exit and bionically leaps toward it, then hurls herself outside just as bright sparks light up the control room. Looks like she just avoided a grisly electrocution death. As the jeep fast approaches - eeeek! - Jaime attempts to get up, but quickly realizes that her right knee is all out of whack. She rolls up her pant leg and is dismayed when she sees that a chunk of her simulated skin has been ripped off, exposing the bionic wire innards. Yeech. When the jeep pulls up, a helplessly immobile Jaime remains slumped against the building. JT rushes to her side and asks her if she's OK...and why in the hell she broke into his super secret research lab. Warren tells JT they're going to have to lock her up as punishment for trespassing, but JT glares at him and barks, "I'll take care of it!" Jaime tells JT she was merely curious about what he had going on in this little building, and he seems satisfied with that (for now) and assists her into the jeep and drives her back to the house. Once she's settled into bed, he hands her a beverage and looms over her until she drinks it. She immediately gets sleepy and loses consciousness, and JT mutters, "Get some rest."
The next morning, JT pokes Jaime awake and apologizes for roofie-ing her without her consent, but figured it was the best way to ensure that she got adequate rest. A sleeping pill probably would have done the trick too, but OK. She tells him that her leg is in pretty bad shape and that she should probably get to a bionic surgeon asap - but JT sternly says she has "some fancy explaining" to do, and asks her again what she was doing in his research lab. Jaime then breaches any sort of confidentiality she's probably expected to maintain as an OSI agent and tells him that she was sent here by the government to investigate a recent unauthorized missile that was launched from somewhere inside his ranch. JT barks, "That's hogwash!" and says it could have come from lots of other places. Jaime adds that during the missile launch, the government's radar network had been deliberately jammed. She tells him she saw something labelled "high frequency intercept & jam" in his research lab last night, then sternly says that he has some fancy explaining to do. JT and Jaime head over to the research lab to look over the controls - and JT admits that, yep, he and Warren did, in fact, design a radar jamming device. He says they showed it to the "DC soft-heads", but they scoffed at it and didn't think it would actually work. He then whines about how hurt he is that she came here to spy on him - but Jaime assures him she's here to prove his innocence. She asks him if it's possible that someone launched a missile and then activated the jammer behind his back...and JT mulls over that possibility and says if that kind of shit is going on without his knowledge, he's going to find out right now. Back at the house, JT is on the phone, barking at someone to find Warren asap, then tells Jaime he's going to search for him himself. Jaime picks up the phone to update Oscar on the latest developments, but an armed guard suddenly appears in the doorway and orders her to put the phone down and follow him. Jaime limps toward him, then grabs the rug he's standing on and bionically pulls it, sending him tumbling to the floor. Before Jaime can hobble away, however, she's blocked by Warren and another armed guard. Warren orders her to come with him quietly, then leads her to a storage room where JT is laying unconscious on the floor. After the commercial break, JT regains consciousness and tells Jaime that someone hit him on the head. He's also learned that Warren has been involved in a boatload of illegal shit. A few seconds later, Warren enters the storage room and barks at JT and Jaime to follow him to the research lab. Warren orders Jaime to provide him with the name and contact info of her superior at the OSI, and she caves and gives him Oscar's name, and then dials the number of MEWS. When Warren gets Oscar on the phone, he demands a delivery of $15 million in exchange for not launching another missile - this time with an explosive. He tauntingly adds that it'll be impossible to intercept 'cause he's going to concurrently jam the radar system - just like he did the other night. He says he has two hostages, and allows JT to briefly talk to him. JT warns Oscar that Warren is a madman who means business...and then Warren grabs the phone back and tells Oscar he has five hours to deliver his money. And if he fails to make the delivery, he'll launch the missile at an unspecified target. After the call, Jaime asks Warren what the target is, and he gleefully informs her that it's MEWS. An incredulous JT asks him how he could do this after all he's done for him, and Warren says he's extremely bitter about the shitty salary he's been paid despite all of his brilliant engineering work, and now wants the big payoff he feels he deserves [and somehow doesn't consider endangering innocent lives with rogue missile launches a total over-fucking-reaction. Dude: just ask for a raise or get a better paying engineering job elsewhere]. He orders his guards to take JT and Jaime back to the storage room.
Steve tells Oscar he wants to infiltrate the lab, but Oscar forbids him 'cause Warren might get pissed and launch the missile out of spite. Steve says he's very worried about Jaime, but Oscar breezily insists she's fine and is probably waiting to make her next move. Jaime's bionic leg is making a weird buzzing noise. She tells JT they need to escape - but before that can happen, she needs to reveal to him a government secret regarding her bionicness. I'm not sure how tightly she's supposed to be keeping the lid on her cyborg status, but she's pretty damn cavalier about showcasing her superhuman strength on pretty much every mission she's been sent on. She shows JT her bum leg and asks if he can fix it, and he stares at the exposed wires in befuddlement and says he's never seen anything like this. He thinks he might be able to bridge the severed wires with a soldering iron...so Jaime looks around, sees an electrical box, and asks him if a couple of live wires would work. He says they might just do the trick, so she bionically pulls apart the box and rips out two wires. She connects them to test them out, and when they generate a huge spark, JT nods and says, "They'll do." Jaime sits down, rolls up her pant leg, and JT gets to work. Oscar packs up $15 million in a briefcase, then climbs into a helicopter. JT does his best to repair Jaime's leg, then nods in admiration and calls her bionics "an amazing piece of equipment". I dunno 'bout that...based on what I've seen of her and Steve's injuries, they seem to break down a lot. Jaime gets up and walks around and says it definitely feels a lot better...then kicks down the door of the storage room. JT punches the guard so that he and Jaime can run past him...but a few seconds later, the guard regains consciousness and alerts Warren about the escapees. Warren pushes a button that electrifies the chain-link fence surrounding the research lab and tells the guard the two will never make it there alive. When Jaime and JT arrive at the research lab, JT warns her that the fence is probably electrified. He directs her to where the control box is buried, and she bionically digs it up and gives it a good whack! and bam! the fence is suddenly de-electrified. JT points up at the antenna perched atop the roof and says that all they really need to do to prevent a radar jammed missile launch is disable the antenna. Jaime bionically jumps atop the roof, which seems to really wig JT out...but then a few seconds later, Warren and his goons appear, and he orders Jaime to come down and informs her "it's over". Jaime climbs down and waits with Warren, JT, and the goons for Oscar's money delivery. A few seconds later, the helicopter arrives, and Oscar rushes over, clutching the briefcase. He orders Warren to deactivate the missile launcher - and but then stupid JT jumps into action and tackles Warren. As a result, the missile gets launched, which prompts Jaime to shriek, "It's headed for MEWS!" and then JT shrieks, "The antenna!" Jaime's like, "Oh yeah!" - LOL - and bionically runs toward the research lab, stumbling several times when her injured bionic leg repeatedly poops out on her. Steve, meanwhile, is furiously working the controls at his MEWS workstation - but due to the radar jam, he's powerless to intercept the hurtling missile. An officer who's plotting out the estimated trajectory of the missile on a glass map informs Steve that the missile is headed straight for them, meaning there's no time to evacuate. Eeeek!
Jaime stares around uselessly, then suddenly gets an idea and uproots one of the poles holding up the fencing around the lab. She hurtles it like a javelin toward the antenna, which smashes it to pieces and disables the jamming device. The alarms at the Air Force are promptly activated to indicate the oncoming missile, and Steve quickly determines the exact coordinates and launches a counter missile, which destroys Warren's missile. Phew! Jaime sees the mid-air blast and smiles with relief. Steve arrives at Jaime's apartment...and the two hug afterJaime goes, "That was close, huh?" [Er...Yes.] Oscar introduces Steve to JT, then says they're off to DC to discuss his radar jammer with the Washington soft-heads. After the two leave, Jaime and Steve settle onto the couch and cozily canoodle in front of the fire. They agree to have a candlelit dinner, a little dessert (mmm hmm..), then get into some smooching action. I guess she's suddenly into him again. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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