Riptide - Season 2, Episode 1
Recap: Season 2 kicks off with some (not unexpected) gratuitous footage of bikini clad women and buff surfers - before the camera finally pans over to the roadside where the Riptide trio has been delayed while making an airport run 'cause of a flat tire. Nick changes the tire and grumblingly tells Cody they're now twenty minutes late picking up Marion, aka the daughter of Cody's rich friend (along with her two gal pals). As soon as he's finished changing the tire, the three hurriedly pile into the truck and speed to the airport.
A private plane lands at the local airport, and three well-heeled, high maintenance looking young women disembark and gush about the warm California weather and how it's sooooo much warmer than Minnesota in November. The quietest of the girls, Heather, says she needs to use the restroom and scuttles off in the direction of the terminal...and Marion wryly remarks to Portland that she's probably off to call her shady boyfriend, Tony. A few minutes later, a stretch limousine pulls up, and a beefy looking guy (whose name we eventually learn is Matt) pops out of the back seat and tells Marion that he's a member of the Sigma Chi pledge class and was instructed to pick up her and her friends and transport them to their hotel. The girls are all, "Kewl!" and rush towards the limo - just as the Riptide trio arrives. Cody sees Marion about to enter the limo and calls out to her...and when she scrunches her face confusedly and goes, "Cody..?", Matt roughly shoves her and her friends into the limo, then climbs in and orders the driver to hit the gas. Nick and Cody take off after them, unintentionally ditching a discombobulated Murray behind while they embark on a lengthy car chase sequence. The limo driver eventually terminates the chase at a construction site, where he and Matt abandon the limo and run off. Cody opens the back door and asks the girls if they're OK, and they emerge from the back seat looking unfazed about the car chase 'cause they still believe that the two men were a couple of Sigma Chi pledges who were egged on to fake kidnap them. Cody says he's pretty sure that the situation is a lot more serious than that, reminds Marion he promised her parents he'd look out for her during her stay in California, and orders the girls to crash aboard the Riptide until he can ensure their safety. Portland looks aghast at being confined aboard a boat and threatens to "gross out" if Cody's safety measures interfere with her Thanksgiving vacation...and Nick and Cody are all, "Er, OK..?" then head towards the truck.
In the next scene, Portland complains about being "crammed in a tuna boat in the middle of a harbor", but Cody insists that they stay aboard the Riptide until he, Nick, and Murray can get to the bottom of the botched kidnapping attempt. He adds that he checked with all the local fraternities and found that none of them knew anything about a pledge to fake kidnap a group of girls. Portland dismisses Cody's concern as paranoia, and Marion concurs and says they have no intention of missing out on this afternoon's yacht party. Cody mulls that over and says he'll allow them to attend - but only if they're willing to take him, Nick, and Murray as their dates. The girls are all, "Ew! Gross! You guys are, like, ancient!", but eventually agree to be escorted to the party by the thirtysomethings.
The yacht club party is underway with young, preppy looking people dorkily dancing to '80s music. Cody radios Dooley, the valet for the event and Riptide's temporary new sidekick, to ask if he's noticed anyone suspicious. Dooley, who doesn't seem remotely dependable enough for a detective agency to be relying on to maintain any kind of alert presence, ogles a leggy blonde crossing the street and mumbles, "Nope. Nothing suspicious here."
Matt arrives at the party and quietly skulks around - but is quickly noticed by Nick and Cody, who charge after him in a less-than-subtle fashion. A pursuit ensues through the kitchen, where the three make a giant mess bumping into as many employees and food plates as possible...and eventually Matt locks himself inside the bathroom and climbs out the window. Nick and Cody race outside to the parking lot, where Dooley is clutching his head after being knocked to the ground by a fleeing Matt. A few seconds later, a panicked Murray runs out of the club and informs them that Heather is missing.
After the commercial break, Heather is quickly located in the ladies room, where she's touching up her makeup. Cody tells the girls that since their attempted kidnapper followed them to the yacht party, they're going to have to remain under their protection aboard the Riptide until further notice. The girls bitch and moan about Cody's edict...and continue bitching and moaning while en route back to the harbor - until Cody finally snaps at them to shut the hell up.
Matt's evil cohort - who's (squeal!!) played by a young George Clooney - has been tailing/spying on the girls and informs Matt that they're currently aboard a boat called the Riptide. Matt says he's pretty sure they'll be able to pull off the kidnapping despite the bodyguards, then cackles about how the nefarious deed is going to earn them a cool million.
Nick and Cody inform Murray that the limo that was used in the failed kidnapping attempt was rented out to George Clooney, who has a criminal record in Minnesota...and Murray digests that tidbit before showing them the tiny tracking devices he attached to each of the girls' sunglasses so they'll be able to keep tabs on their whereabouts.
The girls freak out when the menfolk enter the main living area of the Riptide - and Portland is so horrified at being seen by males when she has only one eye made up that she races to the bathroom to hide herself. Murray gives the girls back their sunglasses and urges them to wear them all the time 'cause he applied retina protector across the lenses that'll protect their eyes from the sun. Cody breaks it to them that they're going to have to spend the better part of their Thanksgiving vacation aboard the Riptide - but that they can still have fun doing stuff like suntanning or waterskiing. Heather whines that that doesn't work for her 'cause she wants to go shopping, and Nick's like, "Can do" and offers to personally escort her to the mall. When the girls simultaneously voice their dissatisfaction at being so closely monitored, Cody snaps at them to shut up, that they're doing things his way, and that they're going to damn well enjoy themselves.
Nick chases after Heather as she irritably flounces off the boat...and eventually gets her to agree to take a drive with him in his vintage red Corvette. While on the road, she whines about her oppressive parents, which Nick correctly translates to mean that they rightly disapprove of whatever dumb schlub she's currently dating. She grins and tells him about her boyfriend Tony, and that he doesn't "fit the mold" for her parents 'cause he's a blue collar guy from the wrong side of the tracks. Nick asks her if she's dating him 'cause she loves him, or is trying to make a statement to her disapproving parents...then reveals that he was once the blue collar guy in a relationship with a rich girl, who ended up dumping him 'cause he couldn't afford to buy her a ginormous diamond ring. Ouch. Heather mulls that over before asking Nick if they can make a pitstop at a nearby gas station so she can pretend to use the can.
Cody takes the Riptide out to sea so he can take Marion waterskiing on the Ebb Tide while Murray keeps Portland company as she suns herself on the Riptide's deck. Marion has such a good time aboard the Ebb Tide that she convinces Portland to join her at the wheel of the speedboat while Cody takes his turn waterskiing.
Nick is waiting at the gas station for Heather to emerge from the restroom, and eventually he grows impatient and honks his horn to get her to hurry the hell up.
Matt and George Clooney spy on Cody with binoculars as he waterskis behind the boat that's being manned by Marion and Portland. A few seconds later, the two speed over via their motorboat and smash into Cody before advancing on the Ebb Tide to force Portland and Marion into their boat before racing off.
Later, aboard the docked Riptide, Cody presses an ice pack atop his head and assures a shaken Murray that he's fine. Nick suddenly bursts in and announces that Heather's missing, and can only assume that the bad guys somehow sneaked into the ladies room at the gas station and abducted her through the window. When he adds that, unlike Marion and Portland, she's at least wearing her sunglasses, Murray perks up and immediately gets to work pinpointing her location.
Heather, meanwhile, finishes up a clandestine appointment with a gynaecologist, then makes a beeline over to the nearest pay phone to call Tony.
Murray is able to track Heather to the local airport...and he, Nick, and Cody sit in the waiting room, watching in irked dismay as she greets Tony after his plane lands. Heather is startled by the sight of the Riptide trio, then introduces them to her boyfriend...and they grimly inform her that Portland and Marion have been kidnapped.
Matt is yanking Portland's hair as he demands that she give up her parents' phone number - but she screeches that that her parents are currently visiting her grandmother in Boston and that she has no idea what her phone number is. George Clooney menacingly yells, "Liar!" and around waves a knife in front of Marion's face and snarlingly says that for her sake he hopes she knows her father's phone number. Marion looks unimpressed at being threatened by the sweet-faced pretty boy that is young George Clooney, who someone in the casting department somehow thought would be convincing in the role of a sinister kidnapper.
Outside the building of the local telephone company, Murray sets up his portable computer atop the hood of the truck and explains to Nick and Cody that he's going to link up to the phone company's network so he can forward every call that gets placed to Marion's parent's house to the nearby pay phone. When Nick and Cody ask him how he plans to hack into the telephone company's network, Murray assures them that his inherent dorkiness will be all the camouflage he needs to fit right in. He then enters the building, slips inside the computer room amid the other IT dorks, and quickly gets to work on one of the computer terminals. As luck would have it, George Clooney dials Marion's parents' house...and unbeknownst to him, the call is intercepted and forwarded to the pay phone that's answered by Nick. As that's going on, Murray is able to pinpoint the address of the originating call - just as the IT supervisor finally twigs onto the fact that Murray is not a phone company employee. He pulls the plug on the computer terminal and asks him who the hell he is and what he's doing here, and Murray proudly introduces himself as the Murray Bozinsky - but doesn't have ID on him to offer proof. When the supervisor barks at someone to call security, Murray activates some kind of alarm and swiftly makes a break for it. He races outside, tells Nick and Cody he knows exactly where to find Marion and Portland, and the three squeal off in the truck to launch Operation Rescue Two Kidnapped Women.
Portland and Marion are whining to their captors about needing sunburn cream and something to nosh on when Nick and Cody suddenly burst into the room so forcefully that they somehow break the door clean off its hinges. LOL. As they point their guns at Matt and George Clooney, Marion and Portland decide it's the perfect time to leap into their arms to express their enormous relief at being rescued, which results in George Clooney escaping the room, and Matt attacking Cody. Nick chases after George Clooney, then steps aside as two stunt doubles tumble down the stairwell. At the foot of the stairs, Nick punches George Clooney into submission, while Cody subdues Matt...and Portland reacts to all the violence around her by examining her sunburned skin and wondering aloud if she'll peel.
Tony becomes enraged when Heather tells him she's pregnant, and accuses her of pulling "a fast one" on him. Heather insists that she didn't plan to get knocked up and isn't trying to trap him - just as Cody calls the Riptide to inform her that her friends have been rescued. When she hangs up and tells Tony the good news, he pulls out a gun and grumbles about his idiot cohorts screwing the pooch on their million dollar scheme by letting Portland and Marion be rescued.
Over at police headquarters, a less-hostile-than-in-Season-1 Lieutenant Quinlan tells Portland, Marion, and the Riptide trio that George Clooney and Matt confessed that Tony was the mastermind of the kidnapping, and that they had planned to flee to Mexico after collecting the ransom. Marion says she's not at all surprised, given that she's always had Tony pegged as a gold digging thug and believed he was only with Heather for her money. As the five start to head out, Nick and Cody notice a bruised Dooley in the next room, giving the police a statement. When they asks whassup with him being here, he explains that he was in the process of saving a girl who was being dragged aboard the Ebb Tide when her abductor knocked him out with a face punch. Nick guesses that Tony's probably on his way to Mexico and decides it's time to crank up the decrepit Mimi for a dramatic chopper-on-boat rescue.
Aboard the Ebb Tide, Heather pleads with Tony to turn back and tearfully cries, "I love you!" and he snarls back that he's void of all feelings for her and was only ever interested in looting her family's wealth. When Mimi makes a sudden appearance above them, Heather grabs a waterski and whacks Tony with it...and when he turns around and wrestles with her, she loses her balance and falls overboard. From Mimi, Cody tosses her a life preserver before leaping aboard the Ebb Tide, punching Tony, and easily taking control of his boat. Hurray!
After the dust settles, Heather sadly assures Nick and Cody that she'll be A-OK, despite having her scoundrel of an ex-boyfriend's bun in her oven. Nick and Cody advise her to tell her parents about her delicate condition and then focus her energy on rebounding from this traumatic experience. Murray enters the room and tells Nick and Cody that there's been a sudden change of plans...and Portland and Marion bound in and gleefully inform everyone that Minnesota is snowed in, which means they have to stay put in California for the next two days. Nick and Cody, who were just about to light cigars in celebration of ridding themselves of the brats, exchange wary glances and quietly put out their cigars. Womp womp!
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Recapper: Isabel K. French
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