Recap: Nick, Cody, and Murray are aboard the Riptide, monitoring their discreetly placed surveillance cameras as they await the appearance of the masked burglar who's been robbing local merchants. Murray rails about how he's been relegated "the computer geek" of the trio, then chides himself for always shying away from physically taking on the bad guys. Cody points out that his geekiness is a credit to the diversity of their fledgling PI firm, and that leaping into silly Riptide action sequences isn't always as easy as it looks. Murray isn't appeased by that and insists he be trained on how to act more tough, so Nick and Cody half-heartedly promise to school him in the ways of faux punches and superfluous street brawls. When the surveillance footage on the computer suddenly goes on the fritz, Murray's all, "Ack! Something's going on!" and catches a snippet of the masked burglar stealing their hidden cameras. The three race out to nab him, passing Mama Jo and her buxom lady crew, who are watching the action from the deck of the Contessa. Cody tackles the burglar, and the two roll around and punch each other...but the burglar manages to overpower Cody and run off, then shoves Nick into the water and easily flattens Murray. The Contessa babes and a group of local businessmen run over, groan in dismay as the burglar escapes by speedboat, and admonish the Riptide trio for once again failing to catch the slippery criminal. Cody holds up a black leather glove and says he managed to pull it off of the burglar's hand, then pompously calls it "a road map" that will lead them straight to the thieving scoundrel. One of the businessmen warns the trio that if they don't catch him by end of day tomorrow, they're officially off the case. Back on the Riptide, Murray studies the black glove, while Nick strips off his shirt, stands around shirtless for a gratuitously long time...yum...then slowly changes into some dry clothes. The next morning, Murray decides to start getting in shape...and makes himself a raw egg blender drink before jogging to the Chariots of Fire theme music. A few seconds later, he gets a stomach cramp and staggers across the pier, where a young woman looks as if she just spent the night. She tells him she's been waiting for someone aboard the Riptide to wake up, and Murray perks up at that and tells her he's one of three detectives who lives there. When she remarks that he doesn't look like a detective, he explains, "I'm wiry, very quick reflexes. And I live for danger." The woman, who somehow refrains from laughing aloud at that, introduces herself as Alison London and says she's looking to hire the Riptide detective agency. Murray's like, "Yay! A case!" and offers to introduce her to his partners. Alison tells Nick, Cody, and Murray that she'd like them to confirm whether or not she committed a grisly murder by stabbing her boyfriend (Jack Wingate) to death...and says this while clutching an extraordinarily large butcher knife as she prepares their breakfast omelets. As the three stare at her with ashen WTF? expressions, she further explains that the murder happened three years ago, and that she just finished serving a three year sentence in a mental hospital. When Nick asks her what evidence the prosecution had against her, she admits that a bunch of people saw her standing over Jack's dismembered body with a bloody knife in her hand. She says she has no memory of that night, then begs them to take the case 'cause she'd really like to know whether or not she's a deranged killer. A wigged out Nick says he's going to have to put a pin in making a decision 'bout that until after he, Murray, and Cody can discuss this in private. Murray says he likes the sound of this case - but Nick thinks it's too dangerous to keep a potential ax murderer around, and is particularly uneasy about letting her near their large butcher knives. Murray says he has a strong hunch that Alison is not a killer, and Cody says he couldn't give a rat's ass either way - as long as she's willing to pay them to take her case. Nick reluctantly agrees...'cause, really, how much private detective work can they possibly expect to fall into their laps like this? As the Riptide trio heads over to the King Harbor police precinct, Murray says he'd like to take the lead on questioning the cops. He greets Lieutenant Quinlan, compliments him on something or other, then tells him they're looking into the Jack Wingate murder. Quinlan gruffly tells him to take a flying fuck, then admonishes the three for interfering with an active investigation. When they're all, "Wuh? Active?", Quinlan explains that Alison London escaped from a mental hospital last night...and that since Jack used to smack her around a lot, he's pretty sure she snapped and then retaliated by cutting him into pieces. The three climb into Cody's ugly milk wagon car to head back to the Riptide, and they wring their hands about not wanting to get into trouble for harboring a convict. When Murray decides to check in with Roboz, he hears Alison screaming in the background...and when the camera pans over to the Riptide, we see that the masked burglar is dragging Alison around the main living area...though it's unsure what exactly he's trying to accomplish with that. When the Pier 56 neighbors race over to see whassup with all the screaming, the burglar runs out and once again escapes via speedboat...and Alison dashes off in the direction of the parking lot, jumps into Nick's red Corvette, and squeals off. Nick, Cody, and Murray spot her on their way back to the pier and race after her...and for some reason she drives to wherever The Screaming Mimi is parked and crashes into the front part of the helicopter. When Nick, Cody, and Murray rush over to ask her what in blazes she's fleeing from, she screeches, "He tried to kill me!" Alison admits that she omitted the part about escaping from the mental hospital 'cause she assumed they'd refuse to take her case. Murray suggests they move forward with this inane storyline by looking into any possible enemies Jack may have had, so Alison tells them to start with Carol Davis, her bodybuilder gal pal who testified at her trial. Nick, Cody, and Murray head over to a nearby gym, where a leotard clad Carol Davis is lifting weights. She tells the three she's really not sure if Alison killed her boyfriend and that Jack was a skirt-chaser who made enemies of jealous boyfriends all over town. Murray, who's feeling extra sassy this episode, smirkingly asks if she and Jack ever hit the sheets...and Carol shoots him the stink-eye before throwing a heavy exercise ball at him, which knocks him to the ground. Haha! She advises Nick and Cody to head over to a rival gym and talk to Heather Johnson, who she describes as "a sexual predator" and a person of interest who probably knows something about Jack's demise 'cause of all the sleeping around she does. Heather Johnson soaks her lithe, bikini clad body in the gym's hot tub as she breathily tells Nick that, yep, she hooked up with Jack plenty of times and needlessly adds, "He was dynamite in the sack." She chuckles about how naive Alison was, and that Jack's friend and junkyard partner, Sharky, would get really angry about the shitty way Jack treated Alison. Heather climbs out of the hot tub, gives Nick an appreciative once-over, and suggests they start going at it - but he's like, "Gross" and dismissively says he's definitely not her type. A few seconds later, Heather's beefy husband Vic appears out of nowhere and punches Nick for ogling his wife in a bikini...and the rumble quickly spills into the weight room, where a roomful of exercisers passively watch them roll around on the floor. Nick manages to fight Vic off, flee the gym, and escape into the milk wagon...and Vic glares over at Heather and grumbles, "I'm tired of cleaning up your messes." The Riptide trio (plus Alison) head over to Sharky's junkyard. Murray once again offers to take the lead in doing the questioning and tells Sharky that he and his friends are investigating a murder from a few years ago. Sharky tells him to get lost and starts shoving him around, so Alison intervenes by shrieking, "Sharky! No!" and running over. Sharky's all, "Wuh? Alison..?" and looks happy to see her...but then a minute later gets angry at her for never calling him back while she was confined to the mental hospital. When he starts shoving her around, which seems weirdly out of character based on what Heather just told Nick at the gym, Nick and Cody pull Sharky off of Alison, wrestle him to the ground, and leave him laying in the dirt. While en route to the Riptide, Cody points out to Alison that Sharky had good reason to kill Jack - just as a pickup truck slams into the milk wagon from behind, then collides with it from the side and causes it to roll over a cliff. Despite the car wreck looking fairly unsurvivable, somehow the four are able to easily climb out the overturned car without injury and be all, "Phew! That was close!" In the next scene, Quinlan is berating Nick and Cody for harboring a known criminal, then orders them into a holding cell. Mama Jo and her Contessa babes put up the bail for Nick and Cody, who are informed that Alison was just shipped back to the mental hospital. As Quinlan cackles about how much he looooves seeing Nick and Cody (and Murray, I assume) behind bars, Mama Jo tells him to give his fat mouth a rest and open the cell door now that their bail's been put up. Hee! As the Riptide trio discusses their next move, Cody points out that no one yet knows that Alison has been sent back to the mental hospital, and that they should use this brief window of opportunity to smoke out Jack's killer. He suggests they call up their three suspects - Carol Davis, Sharky, and Vic Johnson - and "leak" that Alison is staying in a hotel room at Straightaways, and then casually mention that she just regained her memory of the night Jack was killed and now knows who the real killer is. Cody says that if everything goes according to his calculations, the killer will show up at Straightaways and try to off Alison. Nick and Murray decide that this idea is just crazy enough to work...and after basking in the glow of his brilliance for a few seconds, Cody tells Murray they'll need him to act as a decoy and pretend to be Alison. Murray looks delighted to be included in the more heart-stopping part of the operation and asks if he's being asked to do this 'cause of how wiry and limber he is...and Cody's like, "Um, sure..?" Cody calls Sharky and tells him that Alison, who's currently staying at Straightaways, now knows who killed Jack...and Sharky snarls, "I don't give a shit. Fuck off" and hangs up on him. In the Straightaways hotel room, Murray dons a brown wig and crawls under the covers, while Cody hides in the bathroom. Nick, meanwhile, heads back to the Riptide to initiate radio contact with Cody and Murray...and runs into Heather Johnson, who insists on coming aboard for a glass of wine. When the camera pans over to the Riptide, we see that the masked burglar is aboard...and he quickly hides in the closet when he hears the two come in. Heather opens the wine bottle in the kitchen, while Nick heads over to the living area and fiddles with the surveillance and radio gear. He wryly tells Cody that the horny broad he almost got beaten up over is on the boat with him and that she's refusing to take the hint and leave. A knife-wielding man enters the Straightaways hotel room - just as a knife-wielding Heather tiptoes towards Nick with a demonic look on her weirdly chiseled face. Cody flies out of the bathroom and leaps atop the knife-wielder, while Heather raises her arm and prepares to strike. Roboz suddenly detects what's happening around him, is all, "Hell no, lady", and releases a warning beep. The beep prompts Nick to whirl around and be all, "Ack!" at the sight of the giant knife in Heather's hand - just as the masked burglar decides it's the perfect time for him to burst out of the closet, the dumbfuck. Heather accidentally (?? not sure) stabs the burglar, then is quickly overpowered by Nick - just as Cody urgently yells over the radio that Vic Johnson is the real killer. Nick glares down at a now subdued Heather and mutters, "I'm not so sure." Nick, Cody, and Murray stroll down the pier and recap all that was uncovered in this inane episode:
Alison drops by the Riptide to inform the trio that she was released from the mental hospital this morning, then tells them she's sooooo grateful to learn that she didn't butcher her abusive boyfriend. She tearfully thanks them for believing in her when no one else would, then declares herself a new person. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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Recapper: Isabel K. French
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