Recap: Alison makes her triumphant, post-award return to D&D, clutching the glass advertising trophy she won at the end of the previous episode. After several of her colleagues congratulate her for winning Print Ad of the Year, Billy informs her that 1) Amanda is going to be late 'cause she has a doctor's appointment this morning, and 2) the board of directors are gathered in Amanda's office and want to talk to her. The board chair congratulates Alison on her award and adds that they, along with many D&D clients, know that she's been shouldering much of the company's workload while Amanda tends to her ill health. He then decrees that it's time for a change at D&D, namely that he wants her to take over as president, effective right now. A stunned Alison's all, "Say wuh?" - but then assures the board chair that she'd be delighted to stick it to Amanda extra hard and agrees to take the reins of the top job. Michael is meeting with his lawyer about the car accident that severely injured Kimberly. When Michael insists that the road conditions (and not his drunkenness) were to blame for the accident and that he and his wife are entitled to a giant cash settlement, the lawyer says there'd have to be a trial in order to prove this nonsensical claim. Michael chews on that for a few seconds, then asks how much he could get from the insurance company if he agreed to drop the lawsuit, and the lawyer says he could prolly get as much as 200K - but that he first needs to get Kimberly to agree to it and sign the requisite papers. Amanda arrives at D&D, snarlingly asks Billy where the hell Alison is, then haughtily decrees that employees will not be permitted to go out for lunch this week...which sounds to me like a labor law violation of some kind, but whatevs. Billy haplessly tries to explain that there's a good explanation as to why Alison isn't slaving away in her cubicle - but Amanda refuses to listen and storms off to her office, and is startled to find Alison sitting at her desk. Alison rises to her feet and clarifies, "This is my desk" and breaks the news that the board has replaced her [and obviously didn't have the guts to tell her to her face 'cause of what shitty cowards they are]. Amanda scoffs, "With you? I don't think so" (LOL), then tries to sit at her desk - but is blocked by Alison, who hands her the 'you're fired' memo. Amanda stares at it incredulously, accuses Alison of engineering this cruel twist of fate, and threatens that when she does get to the bottom of it, "I'm going to cut you open like a rotten piece of fruit". Ouchie. She then notices Brooke, who's been quietly packing up her (Amanda's) things, and - for good measure - growls, "You're dead too." LOL. Alison calmly tells Amanda that her firing is nothing personal, urges her to focus her energy on surviving her cancer, and assures her that there will always be a job for her at D&D. An incensed Amanda snipes, "There sure as hell is. And you're in it" before storming out of the office.
Over at the hospital, Michael pages Kimberly to tell her that he's been in contact with the Mayo Clinic in (Rochester MN), and that the people in charge are interested in interviewing them. He then covertly produces the insurance papers (related to her accident), pretends they're from the Mayo Clinic and says he needs her to sign them in a rushed fashion...and excitedly gushes about how they're going to become rich, famous doctors who have the privilege of working at the nation's top hospital. Kimberly squeals happily at this ridiculously transparent nonsense...and after she obliviously signs the insurance papers, Michael urges her to pack and fly up to Rochester asap, faux promising that he'll meet up with her in a couple of days when he gets his heavy patient load under control. When Kimberly shoots him a suspicious glare, he assures her that this "heavy patient load" definitely doesn't include Amanda, who he considers a lost cause given her terrible prognosis. He then kisses her goodbye and happily scampers out of the lounge, clutching the signed papers. At Shooters, Jake gets a call from his hometown lawyer friend Sam, who delivers the sad news that his ma has died. Jake thanks him for the call...and when Sydney scampers over to ask whassup with his sudden moroseness, he snappishly tells her to shut her stupid pie-hole. A devastated Amanda returns to her apartment and immediately calls Michael to complain that she feels sicker than usual, informs him that she was just fired from D&D, and grumbles that she can't stand the thought of being anywhere near Alison and her smugitude. Michael promises to rescue her by nightfall, then asks the nurse to page Kimberly and instruct her to meet him at the beach house stat. That evening, Jo finds Jake in the Melrose Place courtyard, sitting despondently by the pool. When she asks 'why so glum?', he tells her he just got word that his ma died. He mumbles something about how he had planned on visiting her to see if her drinking problem had levelled out - but then never did, and now has zero desire to travel to Washington State to attend her funeral and deal with his jerk-off half-brother, Jess. When Jo offers to accompany him and hold his hand through this difficult time, he looks touched, eagerly takes her up on it, and says they'll need to leave tomorrow - just as Sydney enters the courtyard and asks where they're going. Jake apologizes for snapping at her earlier, explains that he was overcome by the news of a death in the family, and asks her if she wouldn't mind covering for him at Shooters while he sees to it that his deceased wino ma gets to her final resting place. At the beach house, Michael rushes Kimberly into an airport-bound cab so that she can jet off to Rochester asap...and a few seconds after that, Amanda arrives. Michael gallantly says, "Welcome to your retreat", assures her that Kimberly isn't around (at least for the next day or two), and that his marriage is officially dunzo (even though Kimberly has no idea, 'cause Michael doesn't have the stones to formally break it off with her). The following morning, Scott Schenkman of the Greater Plains Insurance company drops by the beach house to inform Michael that the company is prepared to settle the car accident lawsuit - but that he needs to first speak with Kimberly. Michael mulls that over and tells Scott that his wife is very fragile at the moment - mostly because of the accident - then excuses himself and slips into the bedroom to give Amanda a heads up that a strange man is going to come into the room to study her. He hastily covers her head with a blanket and implores her to remain mute. A few seconds later, Scott tiptoes into the room and stares curiously at Amanda...then tells Michael that, despite himself not being any kind of medical professional, he's satisfied with "Mrs. Mancini's" weakened condition and assures him that his settlement check will be in the mail soon.
Once Scott has left and is safely out of earshot, Amanda tells Michael she doesn't even want to know what that strange visit was all about, and admonishes him for clearly trying to pull something over on her. Jake and Jo arrive in Washington and meet up with Sam, who tells Jake that Jess isn't taking their ma's death very well...not least 'cause he was the one who found her after she had suffered a fatal brain haemorrhage. Jake says he'll head over to Jess's workplace (a gas station) for a bro-on-bro chat, then snarkishly remarks to Jo about his half-bro being a freeloader who's been living off of their ma for years. Billy drops by Alison's new office to gift her a fancy new day planner. He also offers to take some work off of her hands, so she gives him a stack of folders and says she needs him to summarize each of the accounts...and is going to have to work late into the night to get it all done before tomorrow. Jake and Jo arrive at Jess's gas station and encounter the half-bro, a disheveled, goatee-ed local yokel, who's immediately hostile to Jake and accuses him of not giving a damn about their now-deceased ma. They bicker back and forth...blah blah...before Jess growls at Jake to go back to California and leave him the hell alone. Michael escorts Amanda back to the beach house after a particularly gruelling chemo session. She collapses onto the couch and thanks him for his help, and he declares his love for her and vows to do everything possible to ensure that she fully recovers. She sternly tells him to never again declare his love for her, 'cause it's weird, far too soon in their courtship (or whatever chemistry-free thing they're doing) ... and, given what a pathological liar he is, is not actually believable. Billy finishes the D&D account summaries and hands them back over to Alison, and she thanks him with an amorous smoochfest...and eventually the two start going at it atop Amanda's former desk. Jake is dismayed when Jess pulls a no-show at their ma's funeral. Sam reminds Jake that after the burial they're going to have to deal with his ma's estate, which mostly consists of selling her decrepit trailer home. A perturbed Jo shushes him so that the funeral can get underway.
Billy tries to engage Alison in a discussion about last night's smoochfest - but she immediately shuts him down and says she's far too busy focusing on her important new job. Billy looks visibly miffed and snaps, "Find yourself another toy", to which Alison bitchily declares that she plans to attend tonight's Advertising Association dinner stag. She then says he's going to have to work late once again, 'cause apparently there are lots more D&D account summaries that need writing up. Jake and Jo arrive at his ma's trailer home and find Jess in a foul mood as he nonsensically accuses Jake of stealing their ma's jewelry box. He bitchily insists that everything inside this trailer is his, and Jake's all, "Well d'yuh" and gently explains that all he wants to do is help settle their ma's affairs. Jess grumbles about how deeply he resents Jake for leaving him alone in this hellhole to be their ma's caregiver - even though no one held a gun to his head and forced him to take on that role - then whines about his ex-wife, who absconded with whatever little money he had. Jake refrains from pointing out that only he is responsible for his disastrous life choices, then sarcastically says they missed him at ma's funeral. Jess barks that he doesn't appreciate being judged, and sneers, "Go to hell!" Billy drops by the beach house with some D&D papers for Amanda to sign so that she can enjoy some extended medical coverage. She thanks him for looking out for her, firmly declares that D&D is over for her, and says it finally dawned on her that even though she's no longer a CEO, she's still "a somebody" by virtue of being alive. (Er, OK..?) She thanks him "for being human", and he kisses the side of her head as he wishes her good health. Jo stops by Jake's motel room with snacks and beer to help him relax from the stressful day. Jake grumbles about how he and Jess are blaming each other for everything...blah blah...and after he frustratedly throws a beer across the room, he stares hungrily at Jo before the two start getting it on. The next day, Jo heads over to the gas station to implore Jess to kiss and make up with his half-bro - but Jess makes it clear that he has zero interest in any kind of reconciliation with Jake, then tells her the story about when he and Jake were young lads and got into trouble with the sheriff after robbing a store. He (Jess) took all the blame and was shipped off to Juvenile Hall, while Jake eventually ran off to California and had a great life [a gross over-exaggeration of Jake's Melrose Place existence, I would argue]. Jess then snaps at Jo to get lost, and she gives up on her effort to get him to tone down his needless, unconstructive hostility and ambles back to her car.
At the hospital, Michael confides in Matt about how totes in love with Amanda he is...and a stunned looking Matt says that while it's nice to hear him talk so pleasantly about someone, he's currently married to a psycho-nut named Kimberly. Michael says he knows full well what an unstable kook he hitched his wagon to...and adds that he's looking for a quick way to pay her off and dump her like yesterday's news. During an impromptu meeting outside Ma Hanson's trailer, Sam tells Jess and Jake that settling their ma's affairs translates to hiring a realtor to sell the trailer and split the meagre earnings between them. Jake hastily says he's A-OK with Jess getting all of it, to which Jess bitchily argues that he doesn't need his charity [even though he so clearly does] ... and after the two bros glare hatefully at each other for several seconds, Jake says he really just wants to do the right thing. He signs the papers Sam hands him, and concludes the meeting by telling Jess to do whatever he wants with the trailer cash...and as he and Jo amble off, a contrite Jess blurts out an apology for being such a surly douchewad for the last two days, and that he'd maybe like to give him a call sometime. Jake happily says that that'd be nice, and then he and Jo climb into their car and drive off. Michael returns to the beach house and is all 'ack!' when he finds Amanda collapsed on the kitchen floor. He scoops her up and rushes her out the front door to his car - just as Kimberly enters through the side (sliding door) entrance, calls out for Michael, and gushes about how amazingly her Mayo Clinic interview went. [Incidentally, I find it interesting and deeply surprising that Michael went through the actual trouble of setting up a Mayo Clinic interview in his haste to get her out of town for a few days.] When she gets no response, she wanders into the bedroom, sniffs Amanda's bathrobe, then glares incredulously at a bottle of medication on the nightstand that has Amanda's name on the label. Oops. Thanks for reading! If you are enjoying TVofYore's recaps, consider thanking me by buying me a "coffee"!
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MELROSE PLACE HOMEPAGE
Recapper: Isabel K. French 
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