Melrose Place - Season 3, Episode 21

Kimberly learns she's being cuckqueaned

"Breakfast at Tiffany's, Dinner at Eight"
Original airdate: 2/20/1995

Episode summary: Kimberly is miffed when Michael jets off to New York to see about getting Amanda specialized cancer treatment. Alison and Billy botch a pitch to a disgruntled D&D client. An increasingly deranged Detective John Rawlings pulls his gun on Jo and Matt.

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Recap: As Michael packs a suitcase to travel with Amanda to New York so he can plead with Dr. Steele to take her on as a patient, Kimberly snarlingly questions why he feels the need to be the woman's personal escort. Michael mumbles something about being intimately involved with Amanda's case, then rushes off...leaving Kimberly staring after him with a look of stunned dismay.

Over at Melrose Place, Amanda instructs Alison and Billy to keep their loose lips zipped about the real reason she's in New York...then gives them her contact number - but warns not to call unless it's a dire, 'world is coming to an end' type emergency.
 
As Matt helps Jo get her ransacked apartment back in order, Jo worriedly natters about the possibility that Detective John Rawlings might be spying on them while they clean up the mess he made, then abruptly screeches, "Go to hell!" - in case he happens to be listening. Matt remarks that John could be guilty of manslaughter if the now comatose drug dealer he beat up (Davis) dies, and Jo wrings her hands about having had enough trouble in her life this season - while at the same time feels kinda bad about Davis being in a coma. Matt reminds her that neither of them has done anything wrong and strongly believes that everything is going to turn out fine.

Sydney prepares breakfast for Jane and tells her sister that she's fully dedicated to making her life easier. Jane argues that she doesn't want or need a personal slave and would much rather put the past behind them...and when Sydney nonetheless expresses great joy at the idea of devoting her life to being her personal slave, Jane wryly rejoins, "You're my cross to bear."

Alison and Billy are meeting with a disgruntled D&D client (Franklin of Franklin Cruise Lines), who's pissily railing about how hard they screwed the pooch on the last campaign. When he sourly asks where in blazes Amanda is, Alison tells him she's in New York on business, but that she and Billy are fully authorized to cobble together an entirely new campaign. Franklin sneers, "Good" and says he wants a presentation tomorrow morning...and Alison and Billy assure him they'd be delighted to share their ideas with him despite the ridiculously short notice [in lieu of telling him where he can shove his sneery bitchitude and unreasonable demands].  

Over at the hospital, Detective John Rawlings wanders into Matt's office looking a combination of worried and demented. He gets all in Matt's face and informs him that the Internal Affairs cop, Bob Wilkens, hates him sooooo much that he'd love to pin a murder on him. He adds says that the comatose Davis might actually die, and that [instead of feeling an ounce of guilt for possibly beating a man to death] he can't help but wonder if Jo lied to him about not exiting the car and sneakily took photos of him attacking the hapless drug dealer. Matt plays dumb and pretends to know nothing about any covertly taken photos and weakly promises, "I'll see what I can do" ... and John mumbles, "Thank you" and stumbles out of the office in a daze.

"Did Jo take photos of the violent beating I gave to that drug dealer?"

"Define take."

While checking into a New York hotel, Amanda's all, "Hell no" when the front desk clerk tells her that she and Michael are booked in the same room. As Michael feigns shock at the reservation "error", the clerk informs them that the hotel is fully booked (because of course it is) - but that the situation isn't entirely a calamity 'cause the room has two beds. Amanda sighs and says she's reluctantly OK with having to bunk with Michael...and after she saunters off and is safely out of hearing range, Michael tips the clerk for not letting on that he was well aware at the time he booked the room that there was only one room available in the entire hotel. Mmm hmm..

Jane drops by Shooters to urge Jake to rehire Sydney, pointing out that Rikki (and not Sydney) was the head case who trashed his bar. Jake hems and haws...but when Jane assures him that Sydney has (sorta) taken full responsibility for her questionable behavior of late, he agrees to let her have her waitressing job back - but makes it clear that if she screws up again, she's out for good.

Later that evening, Kimberly calls the New York hotel room...and when Amanda picks up the phone, Kimberly stares into space with another look of stunned dismay. She then abruptly hangs up and glares at herself in the mirror all demented-like.
 
Early the next morning, Billy and Alison are at D&D after having pulled an all-nighter working on Franklin's new campaign. They express their pride and awe at the masterful campaign they were able to put together so quickly and have zero doubt that Franklin will be hopelessly dazzled by their collective marketing genius.

Dr. Steele is informed by his secretary that Michael and Amanda have come all the way from California to meet with him, despite not having an appointment, and are now in his waiting room. A couple of seconds later, Dr. Steele gets an urgent call, which ends up being Kimberly phoning to warn that a certain Dr. Michael Mancini has nefarious plans to steal his cancer study and replicate it in Los Angeles. Dr. Steele looks alarmed by the implausible sounding prospect, tells her he appreciates the warning, then promptly instructs his secretary to tell Michael and Amanda that he suddenly decided to take early retirement and therefore isn't taking on any new patients. When the secretary dutifully passes along the message to Michael and hands him a list of referring doctors, a defiant Michael decrees that Dr. Steele will see Amanda and orders her to tell her boss that he's not going to take no for an answer.

Michael takes Amanda to Tiffany's, where she picks out a stupid expensive brooch and decides she likes the optimism of making monthly payments for the next two years to cover the jewelry piece's exorbitant price tag.

Over at D&D, Alison and Billy are smugly presenting the new campaign strategy - in tag team format - to Franklin, emphasizing the ritz factor of his cruise vacation packages. When they ask what he thinks of their ideas, he shoots them the stink-eye and flatly says, "I hate it." Bwahaha! He chides them for their inability to grasp the simple fact that the majority of his clients are middle class families who can't afford first class cruise tickets, then decides that since they're both so clueless about what his company is looking for, he's pulling his account from D&D. Alison and Billy stare back at him in mute shock...and it remains unclear if Franklin never articulated his marketing preferences in prior meetings, or if Alison or Billy were somehow never able to suss this out of Franklin before spending all night working on such a misguided campaign.

"What do you think of our savvy pitch?"

"That it was the most idiotic pitch in the history of idiotic pitches."

A freaked out Jo rushes over to Matt's apartment to inform him that the comatose drug dealer (Davis) has died after being beaten by Detective John Rawlings, and that the Internal Affairs cops want to question her again. Matt urges her to chillax and offers to keep her out of the investigation by personally handing over the photographs to the police. He calmly assures her he'll handle everything without her needing to get involved, and Jo calms down and gives him a grateful hug. 

Jake drops by Sydney's place and offers to reinstate her at Shooters, and she happily accepts and says she'll see him tomorrow.

While out dancing, Amanda glumly complains to Michael that their plan to beg Dr. Steele to take her on as a patient is clearly proving to be futile - but he insists it's not, and that she actually has a lot to be grateful for. When Amanda reacts by storming off the dance floor, Michael races after her, tells her she has a good chance of being cured, then leans in for a hard smooch. Amanda glares back at him and snarls that right now she needs a friend and a doctor, not a new romance - but he insists, "This is exactly what you need" and smooches her again, and she responds by disinterestedly ambling off.

Later, Amanda calls Alison and Billy to get an update on D&D business, and Alison fibs and tells her there's nothing going on that can't wait until her return. After the call, Alison proposes a plan to convince Franklin to reverse his decision to dump D&D: appeal to his sympathetic nature by telling him about Amanda's cancer diagnosis, and then get down on their hands and knees to plead for another chance. Billy flatly says it's a very bad idea, not least 'cause it's a total invasion of Amanda's privacy...and warns that since they have no idea how Franklin will react, it could easily backfire on them (and by them, he mostly means her). 

Matt goes to the police precinct to hand over photographic proof about the Davis case, and explains to Detective Bob Wilkens that the envelop he's giving him contains all of the photographs that Jo took of Rawlings as he whaled on the now deceased drug dealer. He emphasizes that Jo really really doesn't want to be involved in the matter, and so Bob says he'll make every effort to keep them both out of it...but as Matt exits the precinct, Rawlings just happens to be covertly standing several feet away, and is staring after Matt with an expression of demented panic.

Michael bursts into Dr. Steele's office and decrees that he neeeeeeeeds to see Amanda. Dr. Steele's like, "I don't, actually" and admonishes him about his allegedly nefarious plot to steal his cancer study so he can take it over. When Michael stares at him confusedly and is all, "Huh..?", Dr. Steele explains that earlier he got a phone call from a colleague who painted a rather dismal picture of his scruples. Michael chews on that for a few seconds, then suggests he take him out of the equation, and insists that he genuinely has zero interest in interfering with his cancer study and simply cares about getting Amanda the medical help she needs. Dr. Steele softens at that and tells him to bring Amanda by his office at 10am tomorrow. 

"I heard that you have some very bad scruples."

"They are, admittedly, quite terrible."

Alison meets with Franklin and blabs that Amanda has cancer, and that she'd greatly appreciate it if he didn't pull his account from D&D. Franklin coos about how sorry he is to hear about Amanda's illness and says it does change things. He then thanks Alison for her candor and promises to factor in this intel while making his final decision.

Sydney reports for her Shooters shift and flirtily tells Jake it's great to be spending time with him again, and that she missed him during her cult storyline. She touches his arm and says she wants them to be close again - but he pulls away and makes it clear that he only rehired her as a favour to Jane, and that the notion of them being a couple again is water under the bridge. Ouch.

Alison tells Billy that Franklin was extremely compassionate about Amanda's ill health and concludes, "I think the sympathy route was the perfect way to go." A few seconds later, however, she receives a registered letter from Franklin Cruise Lines, informing her that they've decided to terminate their account at D&D. Oops.

While dining out in New York, Michael assures Amanda that she has a real shot at being cured of her cancer - just as the waiter comes over and tells Amanda she has an emergency call from Jake. When Amanda rushes over to the phone, she's dismayed when the caller turns out to be Kimberly, who warns that Michael is using her to make a name for himself in the medical research world. Amanda informs her that Michael has excused himself from Dr. Steele's study [that he was never actually a part of] - but Kimberly doesn't buy it, then says she looked at her (Amanda's) health records and tut tuts Michael for clearly giving her false hope, 'cause it's obvious to any doctor with a brain that her cancer is terminal. A devastated Amanda slams down the phone and flees the restaurant.

A vengeance-fuelled Detective John Rawlings bursts into Matt's apartment while Matt and Jo are having dinner. John rails about how he tried his best to be friends with them, then pulls out his gun. A panicked Jo's all, "Ack!" and incoherently proposes, "I'll tell them that I lost my memory! I'll tell them it was someone else!" - LOL - but John yells at her to shut up and points out that her photos are probably viral by now. He grumbles about how Internal Affairs has been looking for a way to kick him off the force (as well they should) ... and that since his life is over, 'cause surely he's going to prison for beating Davis to death (as well he should), he figures 'why not commit a couple more homicides while I'm at it?' Fair point.

"Tell me why I shouldn't shoot you both for outing me as the violently corrupt cop I am."

"'How about we both pretend to have amnesia?"

After the commercial break, Matt tells John (who's still pointing his gun at them) he totally gets the pressure he's under, then proposes he tell Internal Affairs an ass-backwards version of the Davis beating story: a second guy appeared and attacked him (John). John kind of perks up at that fake tale, but then realizes it's really just Matt's desperation talking 'cause of the gun being pointed at him and yells, "Liar!" He then squeezes his eyes shut as he tears up, and Jo uses that moment of weakness to lunge at John, grab his gun, and turn the tables by pointing the weapon at him and growling, "I'm tired of playing victim."

After aimlessly walking the streets of New York all night, Amanda returns to the hotel, tells Michael that Kimberly was the one who phoned her last night and said she was for sure going to die soon...and so she now has zero interest in being Dr. Steele's guinea pig. Michael tells her to pay no attention to Kimberly, and to keep in mind that Dr. Steele is the world's best oncologist. He adds that he voluntarily withdrew from Steele's study [that he was never actually a part of], and Amanda chews on that for a few seconds and abruptly reverses her decision to give up on life and says she hopes to hell he's not lying.

Later that morning, Amanda tells Dr. Steele she really really needs Michael's help through her cancer treatment journey, and Dr. Steele mulls that over and decides he's OK with it.

Over at Shooters, Sydney thanks Jane for convincing Jake to rehire her...then stares wistfully after him as he and Jane head off to the movies together. 

Back in New York, Michael gives Amanda a bouquet, apologizes for his unprofessional behavior this episode, and vows no more kissing. Amanda agrees that, yeah, he really did step over the line when he smooched her uninvited...but then saucily suggests, "Why don't you step a little farther?" before pressing against him for a consensual smooch.

​Mmm...nope. No chemistry there.

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