And Just Like That.. - Season 2, Episode 6

"Would you like me to put one of these on your boyfriend's schlong for you?"

"Bomb Cyclone"
Original airdate: 7/20/2023

Episode summary: Carrie delivers a reading of her 'Big died' book at Widow Con. Lily announces to her family that she's ready to get her cherry popped. Che dumps Miranda.

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Recap: Carrie is in her apartment preparing for a Zoom call by carefully arranging her laptop atop a pile of books and adjusting her lighting. A few seconds later, the Zoom caller (a pretty, young blogger) appears on her screen and asks her what her latest book, Love and Lost, is actually about...and has to admit that she has no clue 'cause she had no time to read it. A peeved Carrie tells her that it's the sad tale of her husband's death, and the blogger looks visibly disinterested in the morose subject matter and abruptly changes the topic by asking Carrie what her favourite lipstick shade is these days...and Carrie just stares back at her perplexedly as her computer slides off the pile of books and fatally crashes to the floor. 

Miranda wakes up in a panic, bursts out of Nya's spare room and asks her what time it is...and Nya tells her it's 10am and that it's Sunday. Miranda pants in relief, remarks on how screwy her bearings have gotten ever since "becoming a nomad", and pours herself a cup of coffee. Nya redirects her attention back to her divorce paperwork and explains to an intrigued Miranda that it's easy enough for her to file for divorce without a lawyer 'cause she and Andre have a no fault divorce...and Miranda self-piteously says it must be nice to have a no fault divorce, given that hers is an "all my fault divorce".

Lisa, along with her family, are gathered on the bed of the primary bedroom, reading the Sunday paper when she spots the ad from Rock's Ralph Lauren photoshoot. She immediately gets on the phone with Charlotte, who happily tells her that Anthony just brought over ten copies of the paper, and that she's been getting calls all morning. Charlotte gushes about how beautiful (in a non specific gender way) Rock is, and Anthony bleats, "Rock star! Rock's a rock star!" Rock grumbles that they don't actually like being the good kid and sashays off, while (back at Lisa's) Gabrielle chirps, "I'm a model too!" as she jumps up and down atop the bed and accidentally puts her full weight on Herbert's crotch. As Herbert cries out in pain, Lisa abruptly ends the call with Charlotte and clears the bedroom so that her husband can privately recover from his penis injury.

Lily asks Charlotte if she remembered to contact her person at Nobu to make a lunch reservation for her and Blake, and Charlotte says that with all of the hoopla surrounding Rock's modelling shoot, she simply forgot. When she says she'll do it in the next minute, Lily complains that it's already 11am and so it's unlikely she'll be able to get her a 1pm reservation...to which Anthony snappishly advises, "Boo hoo. You're seventeen years old. Go to Shake Sack and call it a day." Lily counter snaps, "I can't lose my virginity after a lunch at Shake Shack" ... and when Charlotte, Harry, and Anthony stare back at her in horrified bewilderment, she blandly confirms, "I'm ready to lose my virginity", then grumbles about how the failed Nobu reservation has ruined her loss-of-maidenhood plans. After she storms off, a totally befuddled Harry asks why, in the name of all that his holy, their daughter would publicly announce her sex plans in a way that no living teenager would ever do, so Charlotte wonders aloud if maybe Lily blurted it out as a means of attention seeking...and somehow refrains from reminding everyone that this was the girl who, just last season, was utterly confounded by the notion of a tampon.

"I'm ready to have my cherry popped."

"Should someone who was recently perplexed by tampon insertion really be having sex?"

Herbert tells Lisa he has a Wall Street campaign event on Wednesday - at the very same time Lisa is scheduled to do a Q&A about her film at MoMA. Herbert suggests she do her best to attend both events, to which Lisa sassily counters that he do his best to attend both events...and he chews on that for a moment before shutting his trap and making no more career-related suggestions that could possibly be construed as misogynistic.

Charlotte interrupts Lily's depressing keyboard playing to further dive into her cherry popping plans and gush about how open and sex positive they can be in this day and age. Lily informs her mom that today isn't the day after all...and despite her shocking announcement [to her parents + Anthony] a few minutes earlier, she has no desire to discuss sex. Charlotte reminds her to exercise responsibility by using a condom, and also focus on her pleasure as much as Blake's - and Lily reacts by complaining, "You've gone from sex positive to sex annoying."
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Carrie brings Seema along to an Apple Store to replace the Macbook that had fallen to its death during her earlier Zoom call. Seema gently broaches the subject of summering in the Hamptons and asks Carrie if she'd be into the idea of their fabulous selves renting a fabulous house together...and Carrie jokingly replies that she only wishes the proposal was taking place in a more romantic setting before committing, "Yes! Yes, Seema. I will spend the summer with you."

Miranda is in bed trying to cuddle Che, who's not at all into it 'cause they have a bunch of video cameos to record, presumably to make ends meet now that their TV show has been cancelled. When Miranda chuckles at the cartoonishly upbeat tone of their voice - versus the mopishness that she gets 24/7 - Che hotly retorts, "I'm not performing for you!" Miranda gets out of the bed, throws her clothes on, and announces she's going elsewhere to get a good night's sleep...then urges Che to at least try to step foot outside of the apartment sometime this week.

Carrie meets with her publisher (Amanda) to report on the disastrous Zoom call, and discuss the upcoming Widow Con event at which she's been scheduled to deliver the keynote address. A few seconds later, the event coordinator arrives, and she's an extremely perky woman named Karen Moore who now goes by Kerry 'cause "it's not a great time for white women named Karen". Carrie and Kerry tell Amanda they know each other from the early 90s, when they were set up by their literary agents as writing partners...and Kerry goes on to bitterly complain that they were tasked with writing a romcom - but the entire project when to shit when Carrie didn't bother showing up for the all-important pitch meeting. After Amanda wisely exits the office to get herself a coffee, Kerry grumbles about how the movie 27 Dresses was a total ripoff of their script and once again chides Carrie for skipping the pivotal meeting that could have launched their scriptwriting careers. She then backpedals and tells Carrie she got her a prime speaking slot during Widow Con, then jokingly (though not really) warns, "Don't you flake out on me this time!" Carrie apologizes for her past transgression (of which she has no memory), points out that she never fancied herself a movie writer, and promises to not abandon her at Widow Con. 

Che is sacked out on the couch with snacks strewn about when Carrie calls to beg them to please please please accompany her to Widow Con and provide some much needed moral support. She explains that she gets extremely nervous whenever she has to read aloud to a big group of people [does she, though?], then wanks Che for always being so fearless. Che mumbles that they're not feeling especially fearless these days, but will happily grant her this favor. They snidely add, "My mommy said I have to leave the house at some point this week", and Carrie's all, "Say wuh?" at the bitterness of their tone. 

"Would you accompany me to Widow Con?"

"That would entail interrupting my self-piteous snack-a-thon."

During a small dinner party at Nya's apartment, Nya gets a friendly text from Andre and remarks (to Charlotte, Miranda, and Carrie) that the two of them are doing their best to have an amicable divorce. Charlotte says she never kept in touch with Trey, not least 'cause he had zero desire to talk to her after giving him the dumperoo, and Miranda says that she and Steve aren't even talking about moving ahead with a divorce. Carrie decides that this is the perfect opportunity to tell her about her private conversation with Steve during Season 1's 'No Strings Attached' episode, when the dumb sap was so adamant about never ever taking his wedding ring off. Carrie urges Miranda to press Steve about a divorce, 'cause it's clear that he's never going to move on unless she lights a fire under his ass. Carrie then changes the subject to Kerry Moore, with whom she surprisingly has more baggage than she does with Aidan, who's now divorced and living in Virginia after selling his furniture company.

After the dinner party, Carrie goes home and starts to write Aidan an email, but then leaves it on the screen without clicking send.

The next day, Seema is over at Carrie's apartment to pretend to research rental homes in the Hamptons. When she accidentally stumbles onto Carrie's unsent Dear Aidan email, Carrie explains that it's an email to her ex-boyfriend...and Seema's all, "I really don't give a shit" and quickly resumes her search for Hamptons properties. She finds a large two story home with a lovely pool and shyly asks, "Do you take this house?", and Carrie nods and solemnly says, "I do." Seema looks momentarily relieved, but then confesses that she was just being polite, given that she already signed the rental agreement 'cause these kinds of summer houses always get snapped up so quick.

Che calls Carrie to draw her attention to the bomb cyclone type snowstorm that's raging outside and wonders aloud if the widows will be able to show up for Widow Con. Carrie says they likely will, given that they've been in New York for the last several days - plus, she absolutely cannot cancel her keynote address 'cause Kerry Moore will never let her live it down. She once again begs Che to come 'cause she somehow neeeeeeds them there in order to deliver a great reading for the widows, and Che reluctantly says they'll meet her there at 1pm.

Lily is all bundled up and ready to head over to Blake's place...and enters the kitchen to announce that since Blake's parents got stuck in Connecticut "today's the day". Charlotte steps away from the cocoa she's making in order to process the impending milestone and stare wistfully at Lily, who just kind of shrugs and shuffles off towards the door. When Harry ambles into the room, Charlotte tells him that Lily's off to experience her first boning...and Harry contorts his face into a pained expression before loudly asking if the cocoa is ready yet. 

Lisa grumbles to Herbert that her car service was cancelled due to the bomb cyclone - but still insists on braving the blizzard in order to get herself to MoMA. Herbert gives her a supportive canoodle and offers to drop her off with his car service on his way to the Wall Street event - but for whatever reason, Lisa firmly declines and declares that she'll get to MoMA on her own steam. Herbert fawningly replies, "OK, do you", and Lisa stares at herself in the mirror and agrees that, yep, she's definitely going to do her. She then removes her wig...and in the next scene is seen wearing a heavy coat and struggling through the snow.

Charlotte is watching Edward Scissorhands with Harry and Rock when Lily calls to report that somehow neither she nor Blake had the foresight to supply themselves with condoms for their big day...and, to add insult to injury, Blake is too chickenshit to go to the nearest pharmacy 'cause the store clerk knows his mom and might tattle about his birth control purchase. Lily asks Charlotte to bring her some condoms...and when Charlotte says she has zero desire to brave the blizzard for an errand of that ilk, Lily shrugs unconcernedly while stupidly sharing, "Blake Googled how to pull out...we can just try that." Charlotte immediately bundles herself up to head over to the nearest pharmacy, where she begs the clerk to re-open the store 'cause her daughter is in desperate need of condoms. When the clerk's all, "I don't care, get lost", she calls Carrie, who's also wading through the blizzard decked out in what looks like a giant comforter, to ask her if she happens to have a supply of condoms. Carrie asks her why in blazes she'd think she had a condom supply...so Charlotte explains that she's trying to scare up a package of condoms for her dumbass daughter before she risks an unwanted pregnancy and/or STDs, and Carrie wishes her good luck with that, dismissively adding, "And whatever happens, let it go."

"I need you to get me some condoms."

"I'd possibly consider helping if I wasn't braving the blizzard wrapped up in my bedding."

Lisa arrives at MoMA and heads straight to the ladies room to put on her wig. When she sees an older woman watching her with a look of curiosity, she defiantly says, "We're not going to let a little snow stop us, are we?"

Carrie safely arrives at Widow Con and meets up with Che, who's checking out the sex toys available for sale in one of the vendor booths. The two then enter the large ballroom, where the current speaker is unleashing a string of wisecracks about her husband's untimely death. Kerry Moore spots Carrie, rushes over, and informs her that the wisecracker is the opening act for her keynote address. Carrie looks alarmed by that and ruefully tells Che that her book offers zero comedy relief...then, a few seconds later,  looks visibly nervous when Kerry introduces her as the "always hilarious" Carrie Bradshaw.

Over at MoMA, Lisa is answering questions (from a very tiny audience) about her documentary, highlighting the various women she interviewed who have successfully broken down barriers. Herbert arrives just as she fondly mentions her family...and she shoots him a happy smile as she expresses hope that her film will inspire black women to keep at it.

Charlotte arrives at Blake's apartment building to hand deliver a box of condoms. Lily gives her a grateful hug, but then rushes back inside, leaving her mother standing in the cold and wistfully staring up at the high-rise.

Carrie reads to the widows about her grief, and how she ultimately grew from it and eventually outgrew the immature skank she used to be throughout six seasons of Sex and the City. Che looks deeply moved by her words...and after Carrie wraps up the reading, the previous wisecracking speaker thanks her for writing such a touching book, and that it gave her the kind of cry she needed.

Che tells Carrie she totally rocked it, and that her reading gave them some much needed perspective about their own life. They add that the failure of the TV pilot bruised their ego, but that it's clear they need to move on. The two hug, and then Carrie rushes off to sell some copies of her sad book to the widows.

"Your reading gave me the push I've been needing to give Miranda the heave ho."

"Happy to oblige."

Miranda is in the Hobbes/Brady townhouse, sitting in the living room folding laundry, when Steve returns home. She asks him how the apartment search is going, and he comes right out and admits that he has no intention of moving out. Miranda tells him she can't keep living like this, going from apartment to apartment, and he snappishly retorts, "This is my house!" and angrily points out that, despite him not making mortgage payments (which I found kinda surprising), he's the one who fixed up the kitchen, refinished the floors, and built the fireplace. He goes on to rail about how she never wanted Brooklyn, him, or even Brady...then yells at her to get the fuck outa their lives. Ouch. Miranda is so overwhelmed by his open hatred that she starts sobbing uncontrollably, so he hastily apologizes for his outburst and begs her to not leave the house in her current emotional state. Later, the two quietly spoon together atop the bed, and Miranda says she really really hates that she hurt him so much. She adds that she wishes there was something she could do to help them move past this, then abruptly stops talking when she finds an open condom wrapper under the sheets. She sharply asks him if he's been fucking someone in their bed, then calls him out for playing the victim when clearly he's been bedding another woman. Steve clarifies that he never claimed victimhood...and somehow refrains from pointing out that, since she made the choice to walk out on their marriage, he can have sex with whoever the hell he wants. Miranda unilaterally decides that he's moved on enough for her to be comfortable divorcing, then gets up from the bed, puts her coat on, and brusquely announces that she'll be writing up the divorce papers asap.

Miranda arrives at Che's, grumbling about "the shit show" she just endured with Steve, and that they should have finalized their marital split soooo much sooner. Che's like, "Uh, speaking of splitting soon.." and tells Miranda that it's unlikely their toxic relationship is ever going to get any better. Miranda looks stricken for a few seconds, but then agrees to that obvious reality...and in the next scene, the two enjoy one last spooning atop the bed.

Carrie is sitting in front of her computer, voice-overing that "some relationships are meant to stay in the past...and some aren't". With that said, she clicks send on the Dear Aiden email before staring contemplatively out the window.

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