And Just like That.. Season 2, Episode 2

"Have you seen this missing Chanel?"

"The Real Deal"
Original airdate: 6/22/2023

Episode summary: Charlotte gets upset when Lily sells her designer clothes so that she can buy an electric keyboard. Tony Danza tells Che he can't bring himself to play a Mexican dad on their new TV show. Carrie and Franklyn end their sex-once-a-week arrangement.

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Recap: Carrie and Franklyn are at Podcast Headquarters, working on sponsors ads when Carrie stumbles over the words of a new ad for a vaginal wellness product. She attempts it a few more times, but then firmly decides she's too much of a demure cherub to be promoting anything cooch related...which seems strangely off-brand for someone who wrote a weekly raunch column, while also gabbling about sex with her gal pals at every brunch for six entire seasons of Sex and the City.

Over at a high-end hair salon, Seema's nosy stylist asks whassup with her and Zed, so Seema tells him she's done with that 'cause Zed raised too many red flags, one of which is that he lives in the same building as his ex-wife. The stylist chides her for being too picky while simultaneously wondering why she's still alone, and Seema reacts by admonishing him for trying to "shrink" her, then storms out.

Miranda is - visual alert - going down on Che when they get a call from the TV show's head writer. Apparently, the network hates the latest script (big shocker there), so they need to rush over to the studio within the hour. Miranda doesn't let this showbiz emergency deter her from continuing to pleasure Che, who has to shove her head away before scrambling off of the bed to hurriedly put pants on.

After Carrie wraps up another scintillating podcast episode, Chloe enters the room to ask whaddup with her not reading the vagina wellness ad. When Carrie complains that she blushes too hard by the mere notion of pedalling cooch juice, Chloe suggests she rewrite the ad in her own words if need be - but sternly emphasizes that she absolutely 100% neeeeeeeeeds to read it during her next podcast.

Lisa and her daughter (Gabrielle) return home with flowers and a cake to celebrate an imminent visit from Herbert's crotchety and overly judgey ma, Eunice. Herbert chides Lisa for being late and tells her they need to tame Gabrielle's hair pronto 'cause his ma will have a fit if it's not neatly braided. He needlessly reminds his wife and daughter that Eunice grew up in North Carolina, a place where 'how you present yourself' is everything...and despite him being a fully grown man, he somehow hasn't figured out a nice way to tell the old lady to go pee up a rope if she doesn't like the way his daughter wears her hair.

In the next scene, Eunice has arrived in the building, and is rolling her suitcase behind her. Herbert, Lisa, and Gabrielle nervously answer the door and gushingly welcome her, and Eunice responds by complimenting Gabrielle's braided hair and insulting Lisa's outfit...and then leaves behind her suitcase in the hallway for Lisa to roll inside. 

"Welcome to our home, Lady Eunice!"

"One of you looks like total crap today."

Lily tells Charlotte and Harry that the time has come for them to buy her an electric keyboard. When Charlotte points out to Lily that she has an expensive Steinway piano to play on, Lily explains that she wants to take her music in a new direction and get more into songwriting. Rock begs their parents to please give that a hard no - until Lily reminds them how supportive she was about the whole pronoun change storyline last season. Rock concedes their sister's supportiveness and blurts out, "Fuck!" and gets an instant admonishment by Harry and Charlotte, who suggest to Lily that she simply record her music on her iPhone like everyone else. Lily haughtily retorts that, unlike everyone else, she's an artist. Charlotte tells her to just save up the money she makes giving piano lessons...and when Lily whines that that'll take forever, Charlotte breezily tells her to just find a way. 

Nya is on the phone with Andre and admits that, yeah, she acted a lot crazy during their last phone conversation - but it was only 'cause she had had too much to drink. Andre insists that nothing has happened with Heidi, then adds a yet...and admits that sometimes he entertains the idea of extramaritally boning other women, though most of the time he'd prefer it if their marriage worked out. He then offers a proposition he considers to be a fair compromise: hire a surrogate to birth them a child. Nya reacts to that shockingly distasteful idea by dramatically dropping her phone onto the floor.

Miranda is at an AA meeting in Los Angeles, sharing with the group how grateful she is to be attending these meetings, given that she otherwise has fuck all to do all day. After the meeting wraps, a young attendee (Allie) approaches Miranda and marvels at her virgin (un-tattooed) arms. She goes on to say that she volunteers to clean up the local beach and would love it she joined her and her fellow environmentalists, and Miranda happily agrees to pitch in and do her part. 

Over a drink at a swanky bar, Seema tells Carrie she broke up with her stylist for accusing her of inventing red flags to get out of relationships too quickly...and that that's the reason she's still alone. She explains that, in her defence, she was understandably weirded out when Zed told her he lives in the same building as his ex-wife, and was kind of appalled when he asked his ex to pick up the lunch check during the previous episode. She (probably rightly) translated that to mean he's a bit of a mooch, which makes her uncomfortable, so then Carrie re-directs the conversation to her discomfort at being asked to pitch a vaginal wellness product...despite it being a big part of any podcasters' job to just suck it up and read aloud these types of ads. 

Lily is recording a song with her new electric keyboard when Charlotte pops into her bedroom to drop off a basket of laundry. She glances disapprovingly at the keyboard and assumes that Harry caved in and bought it - but Lily explains that she was able to generate the necessary cash by selling her fancy designer wear to a reseller called The Real Deal. Charlotte stares at her in stunned horror, then rushes over to the closet and shrieks, "Oh my God!" when it looks like it's been largely emptied out.

"I sold my designer clothes so I could record sad songs with my new keyboard."

"I'm appalled, but also impressed by your callous resourcefulness."

Over lunch, Charlotte laments to Anthony and Lisa the sneakiness of The Real Deal, a store that apparently only ever deals in cash. She adds that she's so furious about them looting her daughter's designer wardrobe that she's prepared to sue - but Anthony points out that a lawsuit would likely go nowhere, given that Lily voluntarily sold her stuff to them. As Charlotte fumes, Lisa orders drinks for the two of them, then explains that she's about to start day drinking 'cause her curmudgeonly mother-in-law is having her sorority sisters over to the apartment for afternoon tea. She grumbles about how the old gal constantly makes comments that "cut like a knife" ... but Charlotte can barely mumble a sympathetic retort 'cause she's still too upset about the loss of Lily's designer clothes, in particular a pink Chanel dress she once wore during a piano recital.

Herbert exits his building with Gabrielle and her little friend - but things take a dark turn when he's unable to hail a cab. When one of the cabs is stopped at a traffic light, Herbert pounds on the hood and demands he let him in, and warns that what he's doing is illegal - just as Eunice and her sorority sisters suddenly appear across the street to witness the spectacle. Eunice hastily reroutes her friends in the opposite direction and denies that the man screaming at a cabbie is her son...and also ignores Gabrielle when she's like, "Hey grandma!" Ouch.

Over at Casa Bradshaw, Franklyn tells Carrie they really really need to rewrite the vaginal wellness ad, and does his best to brainstorm various approaches. Carrie responds by laughing at his ideas and refusing to just delve into the task like any reasonable, grown up woman would...and it remains unclear why Franklyn doesn't just pack up his computer and hightail it out of there. 

Over in the Goldenblatt penthouse's dining room, Harry is dismayed that both Charlotte and Anthony are too busy fiddling with their phones to engage with him in conversation. Anthony explains that he's busy looking at beefy guy pics 'cause he needs to recruit a new hottie for his bread store, and Charlotte's excuse is that she's looking into how to get The Real Deal to apologize for raiding their daughter's closet and also return the pink Chanel dress. A few seconds later, Rock enters the room and announces that Lily is requesting their presence in the other room so that she can perform a poignantly morose song.

Lily self-piteously croons about the power of privilege and always having to be the good girl who's "not allowed to be me" ... and Harry reacts by rolling his eyes, while Charlotte furrows her brows concernedly and stares contemplatively into space. 

Eunice drops by the master bedroom to chide Herbert for pounding on the hood of a cab like a deranged man...and a few seconds later, Lisa emerges from the bathroom and asks whassup. Herbert tries to explain the situation - but his ma cuts him off and says the context is irrelevant, chastises him for surrendering his dignity, and reminds him that his father faced a whole lot more prejudice but never so much as loosened his tie over it. She then insults Lisa's head wrap before huffing out of the room...and Lisa tells Herbert she agrees with his ma, adding, "When we go off, they win" and cautions that one day he could pound on the wrong car and get himself into a boatload of trouble.

Che wraps up their schtick at The Comedy Store, then invites Tony Danza onto the stage...and the audience gives him an enthusiastic round of applause. 

Late that night, Carrie and Franklyn are continuing their work on the rewrite for the vaginal wellness product. Miranda calls for a quick hello - but then has to hastily end the conversation when she sees Che and Tony Danza walking in her direction. Tony warmly introduces himself and suggests that the three of them have dinner together tomorrow night.

​When Carrie returns to the bedroom, Franklyn tells her he just heard from Chloe, who once again sternly emphasized that reading the vagina wellness ad on the air is a dealbreaker. Carrie shrugs disinterestedly, but then tells Franklyn she'll just bang something out on her own...and ambles over to the writing desk where she once wrote her weekly 'I couldn't help but wonder' musings.

Seema returns to her favorite salon sporting a messily disheveled 'do. The stylist gasps at her unsightly locks and is all, "Ack! Who did this to you?", so she sheepishly tells them it was the butchers at Easy Blow on 68th Street. She then informs him that his lecture about her life decisions got her thinking she should get back together with Zed, and admits to being too thin-skinned about criticism. The stylist earnestly explains that he gives all of his clients harsh (but well meaning) advice, then urges her into his chair so he can properly attend to her rat's nest.

"Who has done this to you?"

"Your less nosy, less talented replacement."

Miranda is helping Allie and her environmentalist friends clean up the beach when she gets a call from Nya, who reports that right now she's angrily stuffing Andre's belongings into a hefty bag 'cause of how outraged she is about his surrogate suggestion. A few seconds later, Allie bounds over to tell Miranda that she has to leave early, and Miranda assures her it's no problem and that she'll just call an Uber to get home.

Charlotte and Carrie arrive at the nearest The Real Deal store, and Charlotte whips out her phone to show the vapid store clerk (Eden) a photo of Lily's Chanel dress, and admonishes her employer for cleaning out the entire designer wardrobe of a minor. Eden points out that the store isn't a bar that's banned to underage kids...and when Charlotte asks her if the pink Chanel dress is at this location, Eden just stares at her blankly and mumbles, "Dunno." Carrie, meanwhile, is browsing the store and finds a wonderful pair of boots she's like to add to her mammoth footwear collection.

Miranda spirals into a panic when she realizes she's lost her phone amid all the beach garbage...and after sifting through piles of seaweed and trash, she approaches a pair of friendly surfers to ask if she can borrow their phone. One of them obliges, and Miranda immediately phones Carrie to get Che's number...which she never thought to memorize for an emergency situation.

In the next scene, Che gets Miranda's desperate phone call, explaining that she lost her phone at the beach and needs a ride home. Che complains that it's rush hour...meaning there's no way they'll be able to pick her up and also make it to dinner with Tony Danza in time. They think hard for a few seconds, then tell Miranda they're going to send someone to fetch her.

Eden tells Charlotte that after checking The Real Deal's inventory database, she learned that the pink Chanel dress is currently in a warehouse - but that Charlotte won't be able to buy it back 'cause it's on hold for a customer. Charlotte responds by threatening her with legal action...and Carrie jumps in and hastily pulls her away and says that clearly Eden isn't going to be able to withstand much more of her brow-beating. Charlotte sheepishly agrees that her behavior regarding Lily's Chanel dress has been disproportionately idiotic, then laments the fact that her daughter seems to be rejecting everything she's ever given her. Carrie gently suggests that perhaps Lily has simply outgrown the notion of wearing little girl dresses...then likens this to her Sex and the City podcast, which she's not sure fits into her life anymore. Charlotte chews on that insight for a few seconds, then decides she's satisfied with the memory of the pretty pink dress...and Carrie's like, "Hurray!" 'cause she really really wants to buy the boots she's been clutching ever since entering the store. 

A purple pickup truck arrives at the beach to pick up Miranda, and the driver introduces himself as Lyle, aka Che's husband (but in name only, 'cause neither of the two ever got around to filing for divorce). 

Across town, Tony Danza tells Che he absolutely cannot play a Mexican dad, 'cause he's Italian. He explains that his hard core fan base is already giving him pushback on social media, and that he has major anxiety about being "cancelled". [Sounds to me like 1) he's in desperate need of a spine, and 2) his hard core fans are in desperate need of a life.] Che reminds him that their real dad is Mexican and their real mom is Irish - but Tony Danza says he spoke to the bigwigs at ABC, and they unilaterally decided that the Irish TV mom is now dead and will be replaced by a Mexican grandmother. As Che stares back at him unhappily, Tony natters about how much he wants the show to succeed - though not with him as a Mexican.

"Let's transform your Irish mother to a Mexican abuela."

"No me gusta."

Seema meets up with Zed for dinner and explains that she temporarily dumped him 'cause she "got lost" in her head for a minute. Zed's all, "OK kewl" and stupidly proceeds to make a proposition: he wants them to go into business together and each invest 100K in a Manhattan nightclub. Seema shoots him the stink-eye and calls that "an immediate red flag" ... and when Zed argues that it's a legitimate investment, she retorts that she's only interested in investing in herself. She then credits herself for being right about him all along, then gets up and sashays out of the restaurant.

Miranda is sitting morosely by the backyard fire pit when Che returns home that evening. She irritably tells Che she didn't even know their phone number...and also had no idea they were still married. Che explains that they and Kyle are only technically still married, since both are too lazy to actually embark upon the divorce process. They urge Miranda to not be mad, then shares that Tony Danza wants their TV character to be Mexican-Italian, which they're not thrilled about [though it's largely immaterial, since the show ends up being a predictably dismal failure].

Carrie and Franklyn arrive at Podcast Headquarters and are stunned to see everyone exiting the building carrying their belongings in cardboard boxes. Chloe angrily informs Carrie that because she so stubbornly refused to pedal the vagina wellness product, everyone is out of work and the podcasting studio was sold to Apple. She glares at Carrie while growling, "At your next job, don't be so precious about your pussy."

While ambling out of the building, Carrie asks Franklyn if he'd be interested in doing the Sex and the City podcast elsewhere, and he says he'd prefer to not take the podcast or their Thursday romps any further. He explains that the day might come when he wants more than a meaningless hookup once a week, so he figures he'd better get out of this unholy sex coupling now before it messes too much with his head. Carrie just kind of shrugs, thanks him for the sex in the city - both in the literal and podcasting sense - and cheerfully saunters off. 

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