Recap: Nick and Krystle are sitting together in the waiting room of the hospital...and when Nick excuses himself to check in with his service, Krystle continues to sit and stare pensively into space. Steven, meanwhile, continues to languish in his coma and has a big purple bruise on his forehead. Blake is hovering over him, saying he knows they've had their differences, but that none of it matters now. He orders him to regain consciousness, then barks, "I want you to be all right. Can you hear that, son?!" He takes Steven's hand in his and orders him to squeeze...then looks despondent when his comatose son's hand remains limp. Alexis, who's been hovering over Blake who's hovering over Steven, tearfully wails that she needs her son to be OK.
Blake takes a break from sitting vigil to give Krystle a quick update, then urges her to go home and get some rest. She makes a half-hearted attempt to weakly protest, but he reminds her that only immediate family are allowed in Steven's room. Alexis emerges from her vigil to tell Blake he should return to the room, then poutily says, "Our place is with our son." He tells her he'll be there in a minute, then asks Nick to please take Krystle home, which Nick is more than happy to do.
Nick and Krystle stop at an outdoor cafe on their way to Carrington manor. Nick babbles about how he played piano when he was a child, then says he permanently hurt his hand in an accident. I notice that he really seems to like telling people stories about his childhood. He asks Krystle if she's annoyed by the sudden parental bonding that Steven's crisis has sparked between Blake and Alexis, and Krystle pretends as though the thought never occurred to her, but Nick doesn't buy it and assures her that Alexis isn't a threat. He tells her she's a good woman, which is apparently a rarity in her bitchified social circle. He adds, "You're a prize...a valuable prize" and says that Blake is well aware of her worth and would never want to trade platinum for tin. Krystle thanks him for his kind words, then jokes that she'll send him a check for his unsolicited counselling services.
Fallon has now joined the vigil...and Blake urges Alexis to get some rest, but she refuses to leave her son's side. Fallon wonders aloud if Steven might be brain damaged, and Alexis says it's definitely possible, but then then looks panicked at the thought. Steven suddenly starts moaning, and everyone perks up and crowds around his bed. When he opens his eyes, Alexis tells him he got hurt while careening around the estate, shit-faced, and he's all, "Wha-a?!" and starts wigging out. Blake looms over him and asks, "Do you remember me?" and Steven stares up at him in confusion and goes, "Fa-ther..?" (LOL) and when Fallon identifies herself, he stares up at her and repeats, "Fa-llon..?" When he sees Alexis, he says to her in a weird sounding little boy's voice, "You went off to find a rainbow." Alexis looks relieved that his brain appears to be at least somewhat functional, but then he suddenly starts flailing around and shrieking, "What's wrong with my head?! Why won't it work?!" He wails that his mind is in a fog and that it's cold and dark...and his family calmly urges him to chillax and rest.
Later, at the mansion, Alexis is putting the final touches on Steven's bedroom, including the careful placement of a ginormous bouquet of flowers. Krystle enters the room and looks surprised to see her there, so Alexis informs her that her son is being released from the hospital soon...and she's delighted to finally have a legitimate reason to be roaming around her ex-husband's mansion. She assures Krystle that the flowers in the ginormous bouquet weren't plucked from her sacred rose garden; she had them ordered in. Heh. She also had Steven's clothes brought over from his apartment. She tells Krystle she needn't trouble herself with anything related to Steven's comfort and care, so then Krystle tells her about the team of nurses she hired to care for him while he recuperates. Alexis says she's well aware of those arrangements and went ahead and canceled them 'cause she didn't feel it was necessary...and Krystle looks pissed off, shoots her the stink-eye, and storms out.
On the other side of the tracks, a stock car racer finishes a practice run, and when he brings his car to a stop, a leggy blonde dressed in the skimpiest pair of Daisy Duke short shorts imaginable wobbles over on her Candies. Hey - it's the very first sighting of Heather Locklear, who has officially joined the cast as dimwitted rube, Sammy Jo Dean. The car racer is her dad, Frank, and he invites her to sit on the side of the car so he can drop her off at work, which takes about half a minute. After that, he drives over to a nearby trailer, where a surly looking woman in an orange bikini is stretched out on a lounger. Frank tells her that Sammy Jo just timed him and says he's getting faster, but the bikini clad woman just snorts in derision and snarks, "That little tramp!" Frank makes a face and says he doesn't want to hear that, but she ignores that and gripes about how Sammy Jo is always getting in the way of their alone time. Frank asks her what he's 'sposed to do 'bout that, since she's his daughter and all, and the woman tells him about a dream she had in which Sammy Jo was made out of ice cream and slowly melted away. Er...OK. Frank turns on the TV and, by scripted coincidence, sees news footage of Blake and Krystle leaving the hospital after visiting Steven. He exclaims, "Hey! It's my sis-in-law, Krystle!" then tells his bitchy girlfriend/wife/whatever that Krystle may have just solved their problem.
Nick and Claudia are strolling the grounds of Carrington Manor, boring me with their inane chit chat. Claudia tells him she pretty much hates everything about herself, then starts moaning again about how she needs to find Lindsay, blah blah. Sorry, Claudia - but apparently viewers of Season 1 hated the little crybaby, so you're going to have to let it go. Their conversation is interrupted when Blake's limo enters the grounds...and as it passes, Claudia notices that Steven is sitting in the back seat. Nick also notices and cautions Claudia to give Steven some time and space before paying him a visit, and for some reason Claudia takes this as a huge insult and storms off.
Blake helps Steven to his room. Incidentally, he's being relocated across the hall so that he doesn't have to sleep in the room where Ted broke his head last season and died. Seems reasonable. Blake tells him he had a long speech prepared about how sorry he is for everything that's happened, but since every long conversation they've ever had on the show degenerates into a horrible fight, he's just going to say "Welcome home, son" and leave it at that. Whew! Steven looks visibly relieved, then gives his father a rare smile and says it's good to be back. After that, Nick drops by and asks Steven how he feels, then gives him a quick neuro check while Steven fake protests and insists he's fine. Blake chuckles affectionately as Nick orders Steven to take it easy...and after that, he and Blake exit the room to give Steven a chance to rest alone. Blake asks Nick if Steven really truly has no brain damage, and Nick says it's a bit too soon to tell for sure. Blake asks him if there's anything that could be done, but Nick says no, that it'll just take time, so Blake nods and says, "I'm in your debt." Suddenly, ominous music tinkles in the background as Nick has a gruesome flashback of someone's dirty dangling feet. Ick. He gives Blake an icy stare and replies, "Well, we all have debts to settle, Blake" and Blake just smiles and nods as though Nick didn't suddenly act really weird just then.
Blake tells Krystle he's heading to the office, and Krystle walks him to his car and tells him how nice it is to see him happy for a change. He beams at her and says, "Of course I'm happy!" and runs down the list of reasons for his generally happy state: Steven is out of the hospital, he's forgiven him for his relentless douchebaggery, and Krystle is carrying his bun in her oven. Ew. What more could a man want? After he drives off, Joseph stiffly ambles over and informs Krystle that there's a yokel at the front gate named Frank Dean who claims he's her brother-in-law. Krystle pensively ponders that for a few seconds and tells Joseph to have him sent up to the house.
Krystle meets with Frank in one of the mansion's luxurious sitting rooms. He gushes about how beautiful her home is, then congratulates her for marrying so well. She chides him for not keeping in touch after Iris (her sister, I presume) died, because she would have liked to have stayed in touch with her niece. He reminds her that she wasn't crazy about her sister marrying a deadbeat car racer - well d'yuh - but Krystle breezily replies that she just wanted Iris to be happy. She asks him about Sammy Jo, and he smiles and describes her as "an innocent little beauty" and says she asks about her aunt a lot. He then says he happened to catch her on the news the other night with her "oil big-shot" husband. Krystle raises her eyebrows suspiciously, so he quickly assures her he didn't come looking for a free handout...except for a free stay at the mansion for Sammy Jo. Krystle says she's totally fine with that, and A-OK with her niece staying at Carrington manor as long as she likes.
Krystle checks in on Steven, who has fallen asleep with a book spread out on his stomach. When she removes the book, the movement wakes him, and he stares at her in confusion and says, "I know you...you're my father's wife. But I can't remember your name." Krystle smiles and tells him her name, and he gets all upset that he couldn't remember it on his own. Alexis enters the room at that moment and asks Krystle if they could speak in private, so the two go out into the hallway. Alexis haughtily accuses Krystle of upsetting Steven, so Krystle snarks, "It's my house!" and Alexis counter-snarks with, "And I'm his mother!" She then smugly says it's very telling that Steven had trouble remembering who she was, and bitchily points out that he didn't have any trouble remembering her. She deduces that there must be tension in his mind associated with her...and Krystle scoffs at that notion and accuses her of coloring things, just like she did on the witness stand. I'm so looking forward to the day that these arguments degenerate into hair-pulling pond fights.
Frank tells Sammy Jo that he's arranged for her to stay with her Aunt Krystle for a few weeks, then describes Carrington manor with all of its servants, butlers, maids...and majordomo. Sammy Jo looks less than thrilled with the idea of living with strangers and tells her dad she'd rather go on the car racing circuit with him. He tells her she can't, then assures her she'll have lots of fun and will be waited on like a princess. He tells her that Krystle is rich, as in diamonds and emeralds rich, then hands her a small wad of cash for cab fare.
Krystle inspects the guest room which Sammy Jo will be occupying and tells Joseph it looks very nice. She suddenly hears a horn honking outside, so she peers out the window and sees Blake sitting in a shiny new Rolls-Royce convertible, waving at her as he leans on the horn. He tells her he's not going to stop honking until she comes down, so she rushes downstairs to see whassup. He tells her that a special woman should have a set of cars (!), then hands her the keys. Krystle gasps and says it's much too extravagant...but he argues it's not, considering what she's giving to him: a new child, hope, a beginning. She hugs him and then he invites her to take her new car out for a spin. As they're about to drive off, Fallon pulls up in her ridiculous luxury car. She admires Krystle's new gift and snarkishly remarks that she finally got her status symbol. Krystle just smiles and nods...and after Fallon drives off, she tells Blake she's way too happy to let Fallon wreck this moment.
Jeff bursts into Cecil's office at ColbyCo, tosses a bunch of papers at him and barks, "These just came in." He says that Blake isn't included in the California oil deal, and Cecil just kind of shrugs and says he fought for him, but the Californians didn't want him. Well...who could blame the Californians? Jeff asks him how hard he fought, then accuses him of betraying a friend. Cecil testily retorts that it's just business, then orders Jeff to get all the info he can dig up on the football team Blake owns. Jeff looks confused and is all, "Football team?? Wha-a?!"
Steven's relaxing in his room with a book when Joseph enters with a giant round Welcome Home Steven sign. He wryly announces "Little Dottie Dimples", and suddenly Fallon leaps through the sign, decked out in a blue flapper's costume, and starts dancing. Steven finds it hi-LAR-ious and laughs very hard, and Joseph gets into the schtick for a few seconds...but then quickly has enough and goes, "That's it!" and beats a hasty retreat. Fallon gives Steven a hug and tells him he looks wonderful...and he tries to ask about Jeff, but can't remember his name, so Fallon fills in that blank for him and tells him that they're currently trying to please Blake by conceiving his first grandchild. That's...so disturbing on so many levels. She then offers to sneak down to the kitchen and bring him some donuts and candy, like how she used to do when they were kids - but Alexis suddenly enters the room, and Fallon mumbles something unintelligible and rushes off. Steven is disappointed that his mother and sister still aren't talking, but Alexis is all, "Whatever" and tells him that the most important thing is that he and Blake have made up, and that he's back to being the Denver-Carrington heir. Steven suddenly looks somber and asks her if Fallon knows she's not Blake's daughter, and Alexis says she doesn't.
Blake and Cecil are eating together at the fancy restaurant. Cecil tells him that a reporter has written a less than flattering article about Denver-Carrington, and says it's articles like these that erode stockholders' confidence. He then informs Blake that the Colbyco board is putting pressure on him to call in the loan he made to him during Season 1, like pronto. Blake mulls that over and mutters that he doesn't have $9 million, so Cecil says he'll call off the debt and throw in a million bucks if he hands over ownership of his football team. Blake chortles and says that that team is easily worth $20 million, and then the two start bickering, blah blah..
Sammy Jo arrives at the mansion via cab, and she's decked out in a tight crop top and a fresh pair of unimaginably short shorts. She's greeted at the front door by Joseph, and after she introduces herself, he tells her that her Aunt Krystle is busy driving her fancy new Rolls-Royce. He crisply informs her that the butler will bring her suitcase upstairs for her...and she gazes at him and asks him his name. He tells her it's Joseph, and she grins broadly and says, "Like half of mine! Samantha Josephine. We're like Jo and Joe!" Joseph winces and insists, "It's Joseph" so then Sammy Jo nods agreeably and concedes that a lot of people don't like nicknames. As the two head up the grand staircase, Sammy Jo looks around in wonderment and does a ghastly Scarlett O'Hara impression, which seems to both horrify and amuse Joseph. He shows her to her room, and she squeals with delight and tells him she loooves it. She seats herself at the fancy vanity, stares at herself in the mirror and exclaims, "Talk about neat!" LOL. Joseph tries his best to maintain his usual haughty, disdainful demeanor toward the vapid nitwit, but it's clear that the uppity majordomo finds himself unexpectedly charmed by her youthful babe-a-liciousness. She scampers over to the chaise lounge and stretches out, then asks Joseph what they do for kicks 'round here. He wryly suggests that she ask her Aunt Krystle that question, and she widens her big doe eyes and asks him if there's any chance she could get a pizza. He curls his lip and repeats, "Pizza..?" and she nods and explains that she's very hungry 'cause she hardly had any lunch. He informs her that dinner is served at precisely 8:00pm in the family dining room...and pizza isn't on the menu - duckling is. He then waves his hand in the direction of her skimpy outfit and informs her, "We dress for dinner" then heads toward the door, shaking his head in fake dismay.
Alexis is instructing one of the maids on the specifics of how to prepare Steven's breakfast, then reminds her it needs to be cooked just so. A few seconds later, Sammy Jo comes flying down the banister in her formal dinner outfit: tight blue hot pants and a pink crop top that's cinched under her breasts. She almost bumps into Alexis and goes, "Oh, I'm sorry! Aunt Krystle...?" Alexis stares at her curiously, tells her she's definitely not Krystle, then asks her who she is. Sammy Jo tells her she's Krystle's niece, then chatters about how Krystle invited her to stay at the mansion, which she refers to as "a palace", and then needlessly provides her with a complete rundown of her extended family's history in Ohio. Alexis looks contemplative, calls Sammy Jo "an interesting and pretty girl", then asks her what Krystle's maiden name is. Sammy Jo reveals that it's Grant...and Alexis files away that information, tells her it was nice meeting her, then saunters off.
Alexis returns to her studio and calls Morgan Hess, a private investigator...but he's not in the office at the moment.
Sammy Jo finds her way to the study, where Steven is chillin'. The two introduce themselves to each other, and he explains that he's recuperating from an accident. Sammy Jo tells him she's staying at the mansion while her dad travels on the stock car racing circuit. Steven stares over at her, visibly charmed as she natters about wanting to become a hair stylist by mail, and then compliments his thick head of hair. LOL. Krystle, meanwhile, has returned home from her luxury joyride and heads straight to the study. She warmly greets her niece, and the two hug and compliment each other's beauty. Krystle tells her she hopes she likes it at Carrington manor, and Sammy Jo glances over at Steven and saucily retorts, "I know I'm going to like it here." Steven chuckles, and Krystle looks pensively confused.
Back at the studio, Alexis answers her phone - and it's Morgan Hess, calling her back. She tells him she wants him to dig up whatever he can find on a Krystle Grant from Ohio, then emphasizes that she wants to know everything about her...and by everything, she means, well everything.